Chapter 2
I.
"NO! NO, no, no, no, no!"'
"YES!"
The hands planted in the middle of Ron Stoppable's back pushed him inexorably forward, despite the promised traction of his new gym shoes. He knew this was not a good idea, he knew this was oh so wrong, but his best friend, his bestest friend in the whole world, insisted he do this thing. After the glorious (and unexpected) sight he had seen in their tree house, his mind had gone off line. The only indications his mind was in hibernation, rather than shut down completely, were the wide eyes and silly, awed smile on his face. Fortunately, the department they were headed for sent a surge through his synapses, causing a rapid and much needed reboot.
"Kim, please, I can't go in there. It isn't right. This is...this is..."
"The Junior Miss's section, so what? This is where Mom bought it, and this is where you're going to replace it."
"But, Kim" Ron fought desperately, "Those things prob'ly cost hundreds of dollars, and I don't have any money."
"Yes, you do. We haven't been to Bueno Nacho yet, so you can just use your snack money."
How could his warm, loving, always there for him friend sound so cold? Denying him his snackage? That was just inhuman! "But Kim, what about Rufus?"
"What about the little rat?"
"You'd deny a growing animal it's nutrition?"
"He's had all the treats he's going to get for today." The redhead growled.
At the word 'treats', Rufus woke up and popped his head out of his pocket home. "Cheese?" He squeaked hopefully.
"No cheese!" Kim snapped.
"Sorry, little buddy, but if I have to do this, it's coming out of your cheese budget." Ron explained.
With a litany of words Ron didn't know yet, or at least was sure his mother didn't want him to know yet, Rufus disappeared back into his pocket, pulling the flap closed. "See, Kim, you hurt his feelings."
"That's not all that's gonna be hurt if my mom finds out about this, now get in there." With a final massive shove, Kim pushed Ron into the department.
Ron turned his head for one last pleading glance, "But, Kim..."
Her pointing hand and blazing eyes showed no mercy. "Just ask a sales lady for help. I can't be seen in case she talks to Mom." And with those words of encouragement, she hurried away.
His reluctant feet slowly carried Ron into the bastion of male fears and fantasies, his mind looping her advice. Then the bulb exploded, "SALES LADY! ASK A S..S...SALES...L...L...LADY? I...I...can't...I..." With great speed, and no finesse, he attempted a quick about face. Unfortunately, his natural grace chose that moment to appear, his right leg hooked his left ankle, and down he went, crashing to the floor at the feet of...A Sale's Lady!
Kim sat in the food court, attempting to soothe her guilty conscience with a smoothy. "Ron can do this, I know he can. Maybe I was a little rough on him, but he so deserved it for what he did. All I asked him to do was hide it for me, I didn't tell him to...to..." "Is it really Ron's fault though? I mean, he didn't chew holes in your bra, Rufus did. And Rufus is just an animal, a gross one, true, but still just an animal." "Yeah, about that, what was he thinking to put my bra in the same pocket as a naked mole rat? He knew I was going to have to wear it later! Ewwwwwww!" "So he didn't think, what were YOU thinking of to give it to him in the first place? Especially knowing Ron." "Ok, maybe it's partly my fault, but that still doesn't explain the chili cheese fingerprints." "Do you really want to know what Ron puts in his pockets?" "Ah, no, on second thought..." "Right, don't even go there." "So I guess this is partially, a little, my fault." "And you left Ron in a place he's terrified of because..." "All right, all right, this is a lot my fault, and I shouldn't have made him buy it. The money, yes, at least some, but the other...I guess I'll have to..
"Kimmie! What are you doing here? You should be home."
"M...Mom?"
"You know your father and I don't like you coming to the mall without permission. Especially alone."
"I...I...I'm ah, not alone."
"Really? Who are you with?" Mrs. Dr. P. frowned, arms crossed on her chest, one elegantly clad shoe tapping.
"R...Ron."
"And where is Ron?"
"He...aw...he...he..."
That's when they heard the screams.
"Young man, are you all right?"
"If I just keep my eyes closed and crawl, I can make it to the door."
"Young man...Ronald? Ronald Stoppable, is that you?"
Ron slowly raised his eyes to the amused eyes of the sales lady.
"M...Mrs. Kapinsky?"
Mrs. Kapinsky reached down with one strong arm and lifted Ron to his feet. "Ronald, what are you doing here? And why are you on the floor?"
Still being held on his toes, Ron attempted to explain, "I...I...I..."
"If I tell her, Mom will know before I get home! And if I don't tell her Mom will know I was in the girl's underwear section before I get home! Oy!"
"Ronald?"
"I..I got lost, yep, you know me Mrs. K., got lost."
"Ronald, how can you get lost when you haven't even got out of sight of the door?" Mrs. K' shook her head in amusement, "Never mind, tell me what you need and maybe I can help."
"NO...ah...no thanks Mrs. K., I'll just look around."
"In the girl's lingerie? Ronald, is there something you're not telling your mother?" Mrs. Kapinsky's eyebrows rose. "Because I think she really needs to know about this."
Ron's slender shoulders slumped in surrender. "Okay, Mrs. K., you got me. If you promise not to tell..."
"Ronald?"
"A...a good friend of mine was complaining about having to wear a...a training...b...bra, and..and...I was just curious as to what all the fuss was about." Ron looked up at his mother's friend and neighbor with what he hoped was an innocent and trustful face.
Before he could decide if she was buying it Mrs. Kapinsky was hailed by two girls. Ron's eyes widened as two lovely girls, two senior girls, two...
"Excuse me a moment, Ronald. Connie, Lonnie, have you been assigned a department yet?"
"No, ma'am. We were told to stay with you for the next four hours and you'd show us this department."
Mrs. Kapinsky glanced at Ron, then returned her attention to the girls, "Well, it's kind of quiet today, so..." She noticed a man waving to her, "Mr. Snyder needs to talk to me, so why don't you two help Ronald? He would probably enjoy the assistance of two young ladies more than mine." She smiled at Ron, "These girls will help you, Ronald, but be sure to check with me before you leave."
"Yes, ma'am."
Mrs. Kapinsky hurried toward her manager, but as she vanished from sight, the smiles vanished from the faces of the two teenagers.
"As if it isn't bad enough Dad insisted we get a part time job, we have to deal with losers like this one." Connie sneered.
Lonnie walked around Ron, her arms folded, glaring at him. "Too true, sister, if we had to, ugh, work, why couldn't Dad let us get a job at a trendy place?"
"He said we needed to meet" Connie made air quotes, "regular people."
"Yeah, regular people like this loser." Lonnie laughed.
"So, loser," both turned to glare down at Ron," what are you doing in the girls department?"
"Nothin'." Ron mumbled.
The two girls advanced, forcing Ron back between the displays. "Nothing? As if, probably wanted to peek at what his little girl friends have under their clothes." Lonnie spat malevolently.
Connie stepped closer, "And it looks like he's been shoplifting too."
"What?" Both Lonnie and Ron gasped.
"Look at his pocket," Connie sneered, "He's most likely swiped something he can fondle at night."
"I think you're right," Lonnie giggled, "C'mon pervert, let's see what you're hiding."
"No," Ron managed, "I'm not stealing and you've got no right.."
Both girls got right in Ron's face, "Come on, loser, show us, or we'll call the store detective.
"Show us!" "Now!"
Ron wilted, reaching into his pocket, "O...Okay."
"Quick, here comes Mrs. Kapinsky, show us." Both girls chorused.
Ron pulled his hand from his pocket. Unfortunately, Rufus really liked his soft, comfortable new nest, and his grip was very, very strong.
Kim and Ron sat on the Stoppable couch, trying to hear what their parents, and Mrs. Kapinsky were saying in the other room. The close door prevented all but a few noises from reaching them.
"I am so sorry, KP, if I had just told..."
"No, Ron," Kim reached and held his hand firmly, "It's my fault. If I hadn't tried to lie to Mom, and hadn't made you..."
"Not your fault, KP, I just messed up, that's all. I just hope the mom's don't separate us. I don't know if I could..."
"Not gonna happen, Ron." Kim pulled him into a warm hug. "Best friends forever, nothing is going to change that, ever."
"But what if..." Ron never finished his conjecture as a shout of laughter came from the kitchen.
"Laughing? Was that the dad's laughing?"
"I think so..." Kim hesitated, "but what..."
Mrs Possible and Mrs. Stoppable came through the doors before she could finish.
"Ron," Mrs. Stoppable began, "Your father and I have decided that as punishment for scaring Mrs. Kapinsky, you will do her yard for the next two weeks. And as further punishment, you will clean out the garage this weekend."
Kim jumped up, "I'll help him, this is..."
"All your fault?" Mrs. Possible interrupted. "Not all your fault, Kim, but don't worry, your punishment will keep you busy, too."
Kim squirmed, "What do I have to do?"
Before Mrs. Possible could explain, the kitchen door opened again as Mr. Possible and Mr. Stoppable came into the room.
His face stern, his voice raised, Mr. Possible began, "Kimberly Anne Possible, I cannot believe you..." His voice broke, his lips twitched, his complexion reddened and he whirled to return to the kitchen. Mr. Stoppable's eyes twinkled as he fought for control, jamming with his friend in the kitchen door. Through the closing door the Kim and Ron heard their Dad's guffawing loudly.
The two women looked at each other in mutual husbandly disgust, before turning back to their children.
"All right, Kim, just help Ronald. Your also grounded for a week." She walked toward the kitchen.
"And you will do a good job, Ronald, along with your grounding." Mrs. Stoppable said sternly, before following her friend.
Through the shutting door, the two friends heard two feminine giggles join the masculine roars.
Turning to each other in shock, the two friends began, "Well..."
"Yeah, well..."
Epilogue:
Rufus loved his new nest. And that nice Mr. Possible had even snuck him a large wedge of aged cheddar. Life was good.