Uncanny Suicide Squad
Chapter 5: The Doctor Is In
By
The Uncanny R-Man
Disclaimer- All familiar characters belong to DC.
Shout Outs-
Aaron- of course I got the guys from the JLI from L1701E. He and I co-write 'Uncanny Superbuddies', remember? You want more from Giganta and Bizarro? You'd better watch out for later chapters then. I'll see what I can do about Scandal…
Proponent of EVO- I think Power Girl has got a rival in Bea DaCosta. Oh man, that fight'll be vicious when they meet again…
Todd fan- That last review was short but sweet, just like you, luv.
DarkKnight92- Oh god, the child of two of the most dangerous assassins in the world? The kid's gonna be a psycho! Don't worry, Cheshire isn't a traitor. Damn you Deathstroke!
Doza- Yeah, Deadshot's real happy that he's gonna be a daddy. Who wouldn't be glad to have a hot babe like Cheshire by your side? If you want evil bad guys, just you wait until the Suicide Squad goes up against the Society. Hoo-boy, that's gonna get vicious.
Quote of the day- 'Me Grimlock am strong. Me Grimlock should be leader!'
Suicide Squad HQ, Nevada-
It had been a quiet day for the team of reformed villains known as the Suicide Squad. There had been no missions for the team in some time. It had been so quiet that two members of the team had decided to take a trip into nearby Las Vegas to do some grocery chopping. How the hell they would find a grocery store in with all the casinos and swanky hotels was anybody's guess.
Killer Frost and Captain Boomerang walked along the corridor that led to the sleeping quarters. Killer Frost mentally ticked off a list of groceries.
'We need the basics for a start off…' The ice-wielding villainess remembered. 'Bread, milk, toilet paper, stuff like that… Then there's the luxuries. Deadshot wants his JD. Bizarro needs his comic fix. Cheshire's got a craving for chocolate ice-cream and red M&M's. I need to get some Doritos. You want your fruity Aussie beer…'
'There's nothing fruity about Foster's, Sheila.' Captain Boomerang frowned. 'There's a reason why it's called Amber Nectar, y'know.'
'Whatever.' Killer Frost shrugged as she continued to count off groceries. 'Giganta wants strawberry scented shampoo. And… Power Girl wants chocolate.'
'It's a wonder how she stays so slim with all the chocolate she shovels down her bloody throat.' Captain Boomerang shook his head.
'I think we all know where the weight goes.' Killer Frost snickered.
'You mean those things aren't implants?' Captain Boomerang blinked in surprise. 'Strewth.'
'Now we just need to ask Firefly and Scorch what they want…' Killer Frost said, swiftly getting back to the task at hand. 'Where the hell are they anyway?'
'I ain't got the faintest clue, Sheila.' Captain Boomerang shook his head. 'Those two've been inseparable. You don't think…?'
'Don't even go there…' Killer Frost shuddered, holding her hand up with a wince. 'That's just wrong on so many levels.'
'As wrong as Bizarro and Giganta?' Captain Boomerang suggested.
'Shut up before I stick an icicle where the sun don't shine.' Killer Frost glared as they reached Scorch's room.
The pair didn't bother to knock as they walked straight in to the room. The sight that greeted them made the two former villains stop dead in their tracks. Firefly was stripped to the waist and was tied to the bed while Scorch did unspeakable things to him.
'That is just sick and wrong!' Killer Frost hissed, hiding her eyes with a grimace. 'And I know sick and wrong! Gah!'
'Aw, strewth!' Captain Boomerang turned away in disgust, his face turning slightly green.
'Get outta my room, you sickos!' Scorch yelled angrily.
'We're the sick ones?' Killer Frost snorted.
Scorch lobbed a fireball at the two intruders, narrowly avoiding their heads.
'Get out! Get out! Get out!' The fire-manipulating demon woman yelled.
'Geez, we're gone.' Killer Frost grimaced as she quickly moved out of the room and shut the door behind her.
'Well, that's a keeper. Uch' Captain Boomerang commented.
'Those two need to have their heads examined.' Killer Frost closed her eyes tight and tried to get the horrid mental image out of her head.
'So says the self-confessed psychopath.' Captain Boomerang quipped.
'Oh shut up, Digger.' Killer Frost sneered. 'Let's just get the shopping done before Deadshot gets back with this new doctor guy, okay?'
Portsmouth, Washington-
Pieter Anton Cross was a very busy man. As well as being one of the world's most accomplished doctors, he also moonlighted as a reserve member of the Justice League. To the rest of the League, Cross was better known as Dr Mid-Nite. A medical prodigy, Cross aced his way trough medical college and set up a surgery in New York. Even though his fellow surgeons thought that Cross was a loose cannon, they couldn't deny that he was one hell of a great surgeon. There was no area of medicine that Cross wasn't an expert in.
Cross became Dr Mid-Nite after a lab explosion gave him the ability to see in the infrared spectrum. Unfortunately, the explosion also blinded Cross in the process. Dr Mid-Nite was usually aided in his superhero pursuits by his pet owl called Hooty.
Cross was about to close down his surgery for the night when he noticed a black-haired man with a moustache sitting in his waiting room.
'I tried to tell him that we've closed for the night but he insisted on staying.' The receptionist explained.
'It's alright, Elaine.' Cross nodded calmly. 'I'll take care of him. What can I help you with, my friend?' Cross asked as he walked up to the stranger.
'I'm Floyd Lawton.' The stranger explained as he stood up.
'Deadshot?' Cross blinked.
'Don't worry, Doc…' Lawton reassured him. 'I'm not here to kill you or anything. I want to make you an offer. Can we talk in private?'
'Come in to my office…' Cross led Lawton into the next room and closed the door behind them. Cross then noticed that Lawton was carrying a suitcase. Cross used his enhanced vision to look through the side of the suitcase. Far from being a bomb, as Cross had originally thought, the suitcase was full of neatly arranged dollar bills.
'The Suicide Squad needs your help, Doc.' Lawton said as he laid his suitcase down on the desk. 'Long story short, Cheshire's expecting a kid. My kid.'
'The assassin Cheshire?' Cross asked. Cross already knew the answer but he thought it would be best if he got all the information before making a solid decision.
'Yeah, that's the one.' Lawton nodded. 'I only found out a short time ago myself. I know you're the best at what you do, so I came to you for help. The Suicide Squad needs somebody like you to patch up any injuries that we get, as well as delivering the baby. You have delivered a baby before, right?'
'I have experience being a midwife, yes.' Cross nodded. 'I won't be being held against my wishes, will I?'
'I wouldn't have brought all this cash, would I?' Lawton remarked.
'I… guess not.' Cross shook his head. 'You will have noticed that I am a very busy man.'
'We've got a teleporter.' Lawton explained. 'If we need any help we'll give you a call, okay?'
'I'll think about it.' Cross nodded.
'Thanks a lot, Doc.' Lawton smiled as he shook Cross's hand. 'You won't regret this.'
'I'll see you soon then.' Cross smiled. 'Oh, and Mr Lawton? You might want to give up those cigars. There are several nasty black patches on your lungs.'
'Way ahead of ya, Doc.' Lawton smiled as he popped some nicotine gum into his mouth. 'See you around.'
TBC…
Next: Doctors, And Tameranians And The Main Man, Oh My!
Dr Mid-Nite catches the eye of one of the Suicide Squaddies, Jinx tries to recruit Blackfire, and Power Girl gets in to a bar brawl with Lobo. A normal day for the Suicide Squad, really.