Uncanny Suicide Squad

Chapter 14: Downtime- Part 1

By

The Uncanny R-Man

Disclaimer- All familiar characters belong to Marvel.

Quote of the day- 'I kinda liked it when he made the pooping noises'.

Las Vegas-

Las Vegas, Nevada. A place of gambling, gambling, and... more gambling. the whole place was enough to make even the most cynical person (cough-Batman-cough) look up and go 'Ooh, pretty...' But George 'Digger' Harkness, aka the sort-of reformed boomerang-throwing Rogue known imaginatively as Captain Boomerang, wasn't all that bothered about looking up and enjoying The Strip's pretty, pretty lights. He was slumped over a bar with a nearly empty glass of beer in his hand.

'Gimmie 'nother...' The Antipodean boomerang-wielder slurred drunkenly. 'No... On second thoughts, gimmie a bottle o' Scotch. An' I don' mean none o' that cheap crap ya usually fob yer punters off with...'

'A bottle of Scotch?' The barman blinked incredulously.

'You heard me.' Digger retorted. 'Now, gimmie some bloody Scotch!'

'Fair enough.' The barman shrugged as he turned to look for the Scotch. 'I ain't your momma...'

Digger propped himself up with a hand and grabbed a handful of complimentary peanuts. He then started to try and toss them into his mouth. He missed every time.

'Ow! Sod it! Bugger! Christ! Strewth!'

'For a guy that can kill a man with a boomerang at five-hundred paces, you'd think that you'd be able to catch a measly little peanut in your mouth.'

Digger turned around, almost falling off his barstool. The boomerang-throwing former Rogue caught himself and took a look at the stranger. It took a moment for the drunken Australian's eyesight to focus on the visitor. It was a woman with long blonde hair, clad in a shiny gold dress.

'Hey Digger, long time no see.'

'Lisa Snart...' Digger mumbled. 'What brings you to this neck of the woods? You get fed up of yer boy toys?'

Lisa Snart was otherwise known as the Golden Glider, a former ice-skating champion turned Rogue. She was Leonard Snart's sister. He was also known as Captain Cold. Lisa was also Digger's estranged wife.

Lisa took a seat beside digger and motioned to the barman.

'Gimmie a vodka. With ice and a slice of lemon.'

Lisa then turned to Digger.

'Do I need a reason to see my husband?' Lisa asked. 'Besides, I could never remember the names of all those Chillblaines I recruited.'

'What ever happened to them?' Digger wondered out loud. 'You actually chucked 'em in?'

'You know I only ever had eyes for you, George...' Lisa smiled sweetly. 'I hope you can forgive me for running out on you like that.'

A small smile spread on Digger's face as he looked back at his wife. The alcohol may have been doing most of the thinking for him, but the way Lisa looked in that gold dress, he didn't rightly care.

'Aww, bugger it. I could never stay mad at you.'

Lisa leant in closer to Digger and whispered in his ear.

'So, what do you say we find a motel somewhere and get... reacquainted?'

'Best idea I ever had.' Digger smirked as he took Lisa by the hand and led her away.

'What about our drinks?' Lisa timinded him as she jerked her thumb in the direction of the bar.

'Oh. Right.' Digger nodded in understanding. 'Drinks first, then the shenanigans.'

Hoover Dam-

The infamous Hoover Dam was full of tourists looking around one of Nevada's most famous landmarks. People were taking pictures and admiring the view. A small boy was walking along the railing, completely ignoring his mother's warnings. Two such tourists were Bizarro and Giganta. The two incognito Suicide Squaddies were having a little time off to go enjoy the sights.

Bizarro peered over the side and watched the water thrashing down below.

'Better be careful there, B.' Giganta warned her friend. 'You don't wanna fall over the side.'

'Bizarro am not get hurt by falling.' The imperfect clone of Superman reminded his friend. 'Bizarro am weakest there aren't!'

'Just, be careful, okay?' Giganta asked. 'We don't want our cover to get blown. We're supposed to be in disguise, remember?'

'Bizarro not remember.' Bizarro nodded. 'Bizarro not be careful.'

'You wanna grab a hotdog, or something?' Giganta offered, indicating a hotdog vendor.

'Bizarro hungry.' Bizarro shook his head. 'Bizarro not eat before coming out.'

'Okay.' Giganta nodded. 'I'll just be a second, okay?'

Bizarro watched as Giganta started to walk over to the hotdog vendor.

'My baby!'

Bizarro spun around at the sound of a woman's scream.

'Somebody save him, please!' The woman begged. 'He fell over the side!'

'Bizarro am here to ruin day!' The imperfect clone announced as he threw his trenchcoat from around his shoulders. 'Bizarro not save child!'

The crowd of tourists watched in amazement as Bizarro leapt over the edge of the dam and plummeted down to the water below.

'Bizarro am not here to save you!' Bizarro told the little boy as he grabbed him by the collar. 'You am not safe now!'

'You're not Superman.' The boy blinked in confusion as he looked up at Bizarro's chalk-white face.

'What, you am not expecting somebody else?' Bizarro smirked as he flew back up to the top of the dam, carrying the little boy to safety.

Elsewhere-

Meanwhile, back in Vegas, two women were walking along by The Strip. One was blonde, the other redheaded. The blonde held two leashes with giggling hyenas on the other end. Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy were taking the hyenas for a walk.

'Ahh, you can't get better than this, can ya, Red?' Harley grinned happily. 'Takin' a nighttime stroll through Vegas without gettin' scared of bein' chased off by that stupid Batman.'

'It's alright.' Ivy shrugged.

Harley stopped walking and tugged on Bud and Lou's leashes.

'C'mon, Babies. Sit.'

The two hyenas did as they were told and sat down on the sidewalk.

'What's the matter, Red?' Harley looked towards her friend with a concerned frown. 'Ain't ya havin' fun?'

'It's not that...' Ivy sighed slightly. 'It's just... A lot of things have been on my mind lately.'

'Well, I'm ya bestest friend in the whole wide world.' Harley pointed out. 'So why don't ya tell me what's eatin' ya? '

Harley's face brightened up as she was hit with an idea.

'Ooh! Ooh! You got a crush on somebody, don't ya?'

'Maybe...' Ivy answered coyly.

Harley clapped her hands excitedly.

'Who is it! Who is it? You gotta tell me! Oh, God... it isn't Boomer-Butt, is it?'

'Digger Harkness?' Ivy snorted in derision, her nose scrunched up in disgust. 'Please! I like to think that I've got better taste.'

'Well, which guy have ya got a crush on?' Harley asked. 'C'mon, you can tell me. I won't blab. Girl Scout's honour!'

'Actually, it isn't a guy at all...' Ivy admitted sheepishly.

'If you ain't got a crush on a guy, then who have ya got a crush on?' Harley frowned in confusion. Then it dawned on her. 'Unless... Oh. Oh. Ohhh...'

Ivy looked down at her feet, more than a little embarrassed.

'Hey, bein' that way inclined ain't nothin to be ashamed of, Red.' Harley comforted her friend.

Harley put her arms around Ivy's waist and pulled her close into a hug.

'There, there. Let Harley make it all better...'

Ivy laid her head on Harley's shoulder and closed her eyes with a blissful smile.

'Love you, Harley...'

Harley's big smile faded away as he mouth formed a small surprised 'O' shape.

'...Say what?'

TBC...

Next: Downtime- Part 2

Say what? Ivy loves Harley? Does Harley feel the same way? Tune in next time to find out. Plus: Killer Frost and Elvis! Parademon and Ragdoll go gambling! Cheshire has a baby!