It's Not Always A Bad Thing Not To Be Chosen

I found this half-finished one-shot on my computer and I thought why not finish it? It's a coda to Damon's confession from 2x18 ("I will always choose you."). Takes place the same night or shortly after that, but it's kind of AU plot-wise. Elijah hasn't been resurrected and they have figured out a different plan to defeat Klaus, but the plot is not important in any way. This is about Damon and Elena only.

The lights in the living room of the Boarding House were dim but Damon didn't need any light to know that the bottle he'd just poured himself a drink from held one of the finest Whiskeys in the world. He'd purchased it nearly a century ago and had wanted to save it for a special occasion.

Well, tonight was very special.

It was the calm before the storm, the last night of peace, before tomorrow all hell would break loose. The plan to kill Klaus had been set in motion and tomorrow they'd do it… they'd either kill Klaus and save Elena… or they'd die trying.

Well, at least Damon was sure that he would. Die trying, that is. And he was astonishingly okay with it. Better he died than someone else, right? Damon knew that of all of Elena's friends he was the least important one.

So…

"Damon, there you are," Elena's voice drifted over to where Damon stood in front of the big fireplace. He didn't turn around but took a swig from his tumbler before he set it down on the mantelpiece. Then he leaned with both hands on the stone, bracing himself for whatever it was Elena had come to say.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Can I stop you from talking?" Damon countered, his voice wary and flippant all the same. He heard Elena sigh. Then a shuffle of feet told him she'd started moving towards him.

"Damon!"

"Elena," he shot back, using the same exasperated tone she'd used.

Elena let out another sigh. It looked like Damon was in a mood. He had obviously every intention of making this difficult for her. Nevertheless Elena approached him further.

"Don't!" Damon swirled around and held up a hand to stop her from coming any closer. Elena ignored it. "Damon,"

"No, Elena!" Damon shook his head once. His blue eyes seemed to pierce her right through. "I'm not gonna listen to you saying your goodbyes. You are not gonna die tomorrow."

"I know," Elena surprised him. She sounded very confident. "I know that you won't let that happen, Damon. Of all my friends you are the one that's most determined to save me. I got that when you said you'd always choose me, Damon."

Damon bit his tongue to stop himself from demanding to know if that's the only thing she'd gotten from his confession. He'd meant so much more with these words…

He stared at the girl in front of him but Elena in turn couldn't hold his penetrating gaze. Her eyes were downcast, focusing on her shoes.

"I'm not here to say goodbye, Damon." Elena eventually looked up.

"Good."

"I wanted to…" Elena broke off and took a deep breath instead. Damon cocked his head to the side, not sure what to await from her now.

"Damon, there's something I need to say. Something you need to hear. Because I don't think you know. If…" Elena faltered for a moment but then squared her shoulders and locked her eyes on his. "You know that I don't want anyone to risk their life for me. But you also know that it might still come down to it. Tomorrow somebody might die to save my life. As much as I don't want that… If it comes down to it, if I had to choose…"

"I get it, Elena!" Damon started to turn away. He didn't want to hear it. He didn't need to hear it. He already knew that she expected him to be the better man, to lay down his worthless life for her. And he would, so…

"No, Damon!" Elena's voice rose and she grabbed his arm. Her hand clasped around his biceps and although Damon could have easily thrown her off he let himself be turned around again. "See, you don't get it," Elena continued with a shake of her head. "That's why I have to spell it out for you. If it came down to letting someone die in my place… I would never choose you, Damon!"

Damon was stunned, shell-shocked. He stared into Elena's brown eyes, searching for something… he didn't know what he was looking for, only that he didn't find it. Elena's eyes held nothing but the truth.

"See," Elena went on after a while. "I know that you think you're not… I know what you think, Damon."

"No, you don't," Damon countered, more out of habit than anything else. He had no idea what to think for himself, so how should Elena know his thoughts?

"Yes, I do," Elena was adamant. "You think that your life means less to me than Stefan's or Bonnie's or Caroline's or Ric's. But you're wrong, Damon. I care about you. Just like I care about them. I don't want anyone to die for me. Not Stefan, not Bonnie, and certainly not you, Damon."

"I get what you're trying to do, Elena," Damon eventually ground out through clenched teeth. He flashed her one of his trademark smirks. "You're saying this so that I won't do anything stupid tomorrow, I get it. And I appreciate it, it's very selfless of you…"

"Selfless?" Elena laughed, incredulous. "No, Damon. It's not selfless. Quite the opposite. In fact, I couldn't be more selfish right now. Because I'm not saying this for your sake. Of course I don't want you to do something stupid tomorrow. I want you to be careful. I want you to be cautious. I want you to survive whatever it is we'll have to face tomorrow. Because…" Elena took a step closer and her other hand came up to rest on his cheek. "Because I don't think I could go on without you in my life. I know I couldn't. I can't lose you, Damon. I know it's selfish but, please, Damon. I can't lose you."

She watched Damon close his eyes for the briefest of seconds, as if he wanted to savor the moment for as long as it would last. But when his eyes opened again, Elena realized that they didn't hold what she'd been hoping for.

Understanding, belief… it wasn't there in his ice-blue eyes. Only defeat.

Damon didn't believe she'd genuinely meant what she'd said. He didn't believe her.

Elena let out a sigh. She'd no idea what else to say. How to convince him…

Without a word Damon slowly pulled away from her. He started to turn around, put some distance between them, and suddenly Elena got angry. Why didn't he believe her?

"Damn it, Damon!" She let out, frustrated. "What does it take for you to believe me? What more can I say? What do you want me to do?"

Damon eyed her closely. "Don't die tomorrow, Elena. That's all I ask." He lifted his hand and placed it on the side of her face. His thumb stroked softly over her cheek. "Don't die. So that you can say it again one day, and maybe even mean it."

A small glimmer of hope appeared in Elena's eyes. "But that would mean that you'd be there to hear me say it, Damon."

"True."

Elena realized that Damon was still caressing her cheek. She leaned into the touch and sent him a smile. "So we have a deal then? I promise, I'll tell you again what you mean to me after we both survive this. Okay?"

"We have a deal," Damon stated with a note of finality. But when Elena made a motion as if to step away Damon's grip on her tightened and he repeated: "Remember, you have to survive. I mean it."

"It will only mean something if you do, too." Elena whispered back equally intense. Her fingers came up to graze over his cheekbones so tenderly that Damon had to close his eyes. "Promise me, Damon."

Damon could feel her plea ghost over his lips, they were standing so close. He opened his eyes again. Elena's eyes glistened with unshed tears. Tears for him.

And something inside Damon broke and finally gave way. "I promise," he whispered against her lips. Then he leaned forward the missing inch and sealed his promise with a soft kiss.

Elena pulled away after a second but, Damon noted, not before she'd given him the softest press of lips back. "Thank you," she breathed out and with a gentle smile took a step back. "I'll hold you to it."

And she did.

The End

Not my best work, I know, but... anyhow, tell me what I could have done better.