Yes, Chapter Three!
Ulquiorra was a Vasto Lorde Arrancar. He was the fourth strongest Espada in Aizen-sama's army, killed whatever he needed to do or was ordered to, and followed nobody but Aizen-sama. Aizen-sama was also the only one he feared; nobody else.
So then why was he dreading fetching that stupid human Aubrey? He shouldn't have, and yet here he was, at the door, listening for a heads-up of whatever he would walk in on, next.
"Huh." (Aubrey) "There's a new way to use gelatin."
"Re-really?" (Orihime) "Nobody else does it? But it's so good!"
"Probably. After all, look at Louisiana's methodology. Thank you, deep fat fryers."
"Ehehe… Fried chicken is good…"
"We fry more than chicken, I assure you."
"Huh?"
Okay, they were talking about cooking. Boring. Ulquiorra opened the door, because at least boring meant that they wouldn't do anything—
Where had Aubrey gotten two full-sized kitchens?
Aubrey. Yes, it had to be Aubrey, because there she was dropping something or another into a… something on one of the two big, silver stoves. Why?
"Eeh? You fry pickles?" Orihime looked shocked. But… interested.
"Yep. Always go for the spears and not the chips."
"What?"
Orihime squeaked and whirled around… was that a pink apron? With a teddy bear on it?
"Oh, hey, Ulqui-kun."
Ugh, Aubrey… With a black apron that read, "Kill the cook. (If you can)." Oh, he could. Perhaps he would. "First, do not call me that. Second, where did you get these?"
"Hammerspace." Chekov's Gun.
…What? "Aizen-sama wishes for you to come to the throne room."
"Just me, or—"
"Both of you."
"May I finish frying my pickles, first?"
"No."
"They'll burn."
"It's your fault for bringing in two kitchens."
"Alright, then, no need to keep anybody waiting." And with that Aubrey picked up some tiny bag and pulled out…
"An Akuma!" Orihime exclaimed. I no own D. Gray-Man.
"Modified," Aubrey told her, setting down the skeletal… Akuma? "Ne, Allen?"
"Hai, Aubrey-san?" it asked, seemingly unaware of Orihime's sudden blast of laughter.
"Would you mind watching the kitchens while we're gone?"
"Hai, Aubrey-san." And with that it pulled out its own apron ("Are you using that body?") and a metal spoon.
The throne room was still ridiculously big with the ridiculously high pedestal of a throne (as if the Big Freakin' Couch wasn't bad enough). Aizen was still up said pedestal, looking down at all of his subjects like the god he claimed to be (A God am I, oh please).
"Good morning, Aubrey; Orihime."
"Good morning, sir," both smiled with identical cheerfulness. If Aizen seemed surprised by Orihime, he didn't let it show.
"I'm sorry to have to keep calling you, Aubrey; but I would like for you to demonstrate your powers for me."
"Yes, sir. Against who?"
"Yammy."
"Yes, sir."
"Oh, yeah! C'mere, human!"
Aubrey smirked, but was disappointed. Why couldn't Aizen have given her Grimmkitty? Still, she prepared to square off against Yammy as Casclu led Orihime to the sidelines. The girl looked worried sick, probably because she had seen Yammy fight in the real world. And had been stuck bedridden for five days because of a single backswipe, and had seen him pummel Ichigo when his hollow had taken over… Best not to worry her, then.
"Would you like me to join you?" the dragoness called.
"Only if I get him to release," Aubrey called back.
"The Hell is that?" Yammy demanded.
"My partner. Kinda like a Zanpakutō, but nothing of the sort." Aubrey glanced as Syazel, who looked way too interested in her Halae. "Ready?"
"Hell yeah, human!" Yammy charged, a maniacal grin spread across his face. Aubrey effortlessly sidestepped, wondering if she would even have to use her powers. Dodge, dodge, dodge, tick off Yammy with all the dodging, dodge some more… Dodge.
Orihime looked around the room, taking in everybody's reactions. Casclu looked unconcerned, most of the Hollow looked bored in the face of so much dodging, Ulquiorra didn't care, Gin looked like he had a secret, and Aizen looked detached from the whole thing. If Yammy were to kill her, he wouldn't care. At all.
Yammy hit, finally, and sent Aubrey flying toward a wall. Rey-chan..!
The witch kicked off, and flew right back at him. While materializing a giant black mallet, and raising it high over her head…
And smack into Yammy's head. It was suddenly his turn to go flying… And how was Aubrey able to twirl that thing like a baton? And why did she have the word "Fun!" written along its side? In periwinkle?
"That was amazing!" Orihime gushed as they made their way back. "That huge thing, and you just smacked Yammy across the room!"
Aubrey smiled back, absorbing the praise. She hadn't even used full power, not even close; no need to have Aizen worry about her presence, just yet.
Orihime was nervous. Aubrey had now pulled a wall-size TV out of her bag, hooked up her shiny navy blue Toshiba laptop, and plugged in a Flash Drive. She also had an aura suspiciously similar to Tatsuki-chan's scheming mode.
"Ever seen Nightmare on Elm Street?" Aubrey asked.
"Huh? Isn't that an American movie?"
"Yep; it's also one of my top five favorite horror series."
"Horror?"
"Yep."
"How much horror?"
Why had she agreed to this? Why? Orihime was watching a man named Freddy Krueger kill innocent teenagers in their dreams. As if that wasn't bad enough, Gin-san and a really creepy Espada had come knocking when they had heard the screams. And Ulquiorra had investigated. And Grimmjow had come in and immediately began laughing. And now they were sitting on the couches watching this poor girl fall into a liquidizing floor of blood, and—
"A wet dream?" Gin asked through his chuckles. "I like this man."
"Any human with claws like that has my vote," Grimmjow pitched in.
"Run human, run!" Nnoitra howled with laughter.
"You're making it hard to hear the screams," Ulquiorra told them.
"I heard that one," Aubrey smirked.
… Was Orihime the only one rooting for the heroes?
"What are you watching?" a pink-haired Arrancar asked.
"Oh no," Grimmjow growled. "Go away, Syazel, you'll get too many ideas." Oh, Kami...
"Too late; I love this movie," Syazel smirked. "Ooh, this part especially…"
Everybody but Orihime and Ulquiorra howled with laughter, and Orihime was sure that she saw that Espada smiling.
"Get Stark in here," Nnoitra suggested. "He'll never fall asleep at a meeting, again!"
Orihime couldn't leave, since it was her room and she couldn't go anywhere alone. And even if she asked for an escort to somewhere else, she had a bad feeling that any escort Ulquiorra called would stick around and watch the movie. She hated seeing people get hurt, and being stuck with Aizen was almost preferable at this point…
'Don't worry,' Aubrey told her telepathically. 'The good guys always win in this series.'
So Rey-chan still cared about her, after all. She'd still almost rather be stuck with Aizen, though…
"What are we watching?" a new voice asked.
"Ai-Aizen-sama!" everybody exclaimed about simultaneously (excepting Aubrey's "Sir!").
"Nightmare on Elm Street II," Aubrey smiled.
"I see. Is it good?"
"It's epic!" Grimmjow laughed. "Ooh, wait for it, wait for it…"
Aubrey began explaining the premise of the villain as the others watched (Syazel helped), and Orihime couldn't help but think that Aizen looked way too interested in her explanation. So much so that he asked to borrow the movie, later.
Orihime prayed that he wouldn't call for a movie night.
"Re-Rey-chan?"
"Hai, Ri-chan?"
"I-I'm too scared to go to sleep, now…"
"Don't worry, he's not real in this dimension."
"A-are you sure?"
"Yes, and besides. Do you see anywhere called Elm Street in Los Noches?"
"No-no…"
"Well, then. There you go."
"Oi, Pet-chan," Nnoitra called through the door.
"Ju-just a minute…" Orihime called, eyes crying out, "What should we do?"
Aubrey stood calmly and went to open the door.
"Hey, Aubrey," Nnoitra smirked. "Just came by to tell the pet that I'm gonna get the name 'a this hall changed."
"Really?" Aubrey asked as if surprised.
"Yeah, I was thinking of Elm Street." He threw the statement right at Orihime, looking for any fear in her response.
"Not Spanish," Aubrey pointed out.
"Ah well, I'm gonna try for it, anyway. Pleasant dreams, Pet-sama."
Orihime wanted to scream. At least he left after that, for all the good it did.
"Sorry about this," Aubrey sighed. "Looks like I dumped the can of worms on your head, huh?"
"I-It's fine!" Orihime protested. "I-It's just that…"
"Don't worry about it," Aubrey smiled. "After all of the nonsense you've been through, you could probably just slice him in two with Tsubaki."
Orihime squeaked, not happy with the thought.
"Or," Aubrey continued, "you could heal his burns and see if he'll be grateful enough to spare you. If that fails, hey, you've still got another shield."
"Bu-but he can control everything," Orihime pointed out. "What if he takes them away?"
"Knowing your luck," Aubrey smirked, "a dream version of Ichigo'll ride over and beat Krueger to a bloody pulp."
Orihime blushed. She had barely mentioned Kurosaki-kun, so how had Rey-chan already—
"Woman's intuition," Aubrey explained. "And even if that doesn't work, I can easily hop into dreams; I'll beat him up for you, then toss him into Nnoitra's."
"Why-why?"
"Because Ulquiorra would probably emo him to death."
"Huh?"
"Aww, come on. He's an Emocar and you know it."
"…"
"Or I could toss him into Grimmkitty's. Then who knows what'd happen?"
"Gri-grim—"
"Grimmkitty." Aubrey then noted Orihime's curious face. "Grimmjaw Jaguarjaques? Those facial markings? He's got to be a feline; just you wait."
"…"
"Maybe I should call him Grimmkitty later?"
"No-no! I don't want you to die!"
"By his hand? No way."
"But-but even Kurosaki-kun has trouble! Ho-how could…"
"Don't underestimate a witch."
End of Chapter
Too much OC-dominance? Sorry, but I thought it funny at the time… I'll try to fix that, next time. Sorry for taking so long. Again.
Ara.