-)*(-

Satoshi roused slowly, giving slight mumbles and groans every now and again. The first objects that came into focus were the walls of the room. And they were all wrong – they weren't suppose to be a bright white with blue curtains, they were suppose to be a deep beige with white curtains. Sitting up caused something to tug on his arm. He pulled the limb before thinking better of it and cringed as a needle moved under his skin. He became almost alert then.

Straight-faced, Satoshi took better notice of his surroundings and of the needle hooked into him. He was alone in a hospital room, an iv dripping into his veins. This was nice. What had happened at school? He'd climbed into the bed and laid down like he was suppose to, then... He fell asleep? More than just that if the room now was anything to go by.

Awaking more, he became aware of feeling physically lighter than he had in ages. And he was more rested than he'd been in a long time. That's when reality hit hard again. Krad was gone. He was free to live! The only chains tying him down to the Hikari duties now were the ones that made it possible for only him to have some measure of control over his ancestors' arts. It still wouldn't be a cakewalk, but it was certainly a lot lighter of a load to carry around all the time.

He shook his head, unable to believe it; to firmly grasp the idea that now he could be almost normal. He and Daisuke could actually be around each other without fear. Azure eyes nearly glowed as he smiled. He could-

Azure eyes narrowed as he realized he was a bit scared. Closing one's self off for so long held a price.

Could he even be himself?

What exactly was 'himself' now that he was older? Could he be normal? Should he risk exposure in ordinary life to find out? Was it really okay now?

His mind buzzing, he suddenly felt more unsure about life than he had in years. Maybe having a set path predetermined for you was better. At least one could pretend and force their self to move forward then.

Satoshi shook himself from his destructive thoughts. He'd been given a gift and he was going to use it! If things didn't work out, well then, the average lifespan was only so long. He shook himself again. When had he become such a coward? And when was a curse like a gift? And how had Risa pulled off such an amazing feat?

The room door opened and a dainty nurse stepped in. "You're awake. That's good," she said softly. Azure eyes darted up to her oval face. "How are you feeling? You seem a bit preoccupied, are you okay?" she asked, effortlessly kind and warm. It probably wasn't any trouble for her to bring comfort to most people, especially children. Satoshi nodded, and her soothing voice pressed on, "Are you aware of what happened? And are you hungry? Lunch was a few hours ago."

"I must have passed out. I'm not sure why. And lunch would be nice." If only because he knew the staff automatically wrote any refusal of food down as a sign of something possibly being wrong. He didn't want to stay here any longer than he had to. Hospitals had never set well with him. The sterile places housed too many remnants of suffering and loss. ...And disembodied souls if one looked hard enough.

"That's great!" The nurse suddenly took on a cheerful note. Satoshi looked at her confusedly. "You are a rare case – you came in looking pretty rough, but now you're looking in perfect health. Your skin is a normal color and you're wanting food," she explained. Satoshi had to smile a little at that, however, his smile faltered when she spoke again. "Your father should be here within the hour to pick you up and take you home. We've already taken a blood sample and have had a priority rush put on the test results. Thankfully it seems unnecessary now, but we should receive any news from it before you leave."

Satoshi's face blanked. He didn't want his father near him at the best of times. The nurse noticed something changing in his demeanor. "Don't worry," she said, mistaking the reasoning for his dulling expression, "I'm sure everything will come back fine. I think you must have just overworked yourself at school. The studies nowadays can be overkill!"

Satoshi forced himself to respond. "Yeah." His tone wasn't a very convincing one, even to his own ears. There was a hesitant pause as neither one spoke for a minute.

"I'm going to go get your late lunch now." The nurse eased out the door. Satoshi leaned back, feeling distraught at the loneliness that presented itself as the door snapped gently closed. This was new. Nothing was usually more pleasing than being alone. By himself he had a semblance of peace. Maybe it no longer worked because it was already so quiet inside his mind? Well mostly, aside from the doubts that had started flooding in with Krad gone. Did he miss the angel?

No! That was just crazy! Why was he even considering missing that psychotic freak?

He didn't know, and it was very confusing that a large part of him felt gone, somehow. So, why did he suddenly want company? Shouldn't he want to be alone to recover and make sense of his mixed feelings? Daisuke's face came to mind and realized he'd have to wait until lunch tomorrow to really get a chance to talk to the redhead.

Time slowly went on, and it became increasingly frustrating to wait as the minutes crawled past. What was wrong with him? Why was he so restless? Maybe it was because he no longer knew what to expect. Life was to no longer play out in measured steps from this point on.

It was time to come up with a plan.

He did still need to keep an eye on the rest of the Hikari Arts. He could still feel his connection with them. Course – like always – he'd have to wait until they started to awaken to do anything with them. Then he could seal them again.

Deep inside, a new part – or maybe a waking part – laughed. There was always the option of letting Dark steal the strong ones. The weaker ones could be left to the Hikari and perhaps dealt with in a more subtle manner. Redeeming them would be better than destroying them, like his ancestors had always wanted to have the moral strength to do.

Life really wasn't so bad or stressful.

The urge to go to the restroom hit. Satoshi looked grumpily at the needle still stuck in his arm. The device was comparable to a leash for all the help it was now. He'd ask the nurse to remove it once she got back. And he'd also ask her name. She seemed like a really nice person.

Fifteen minutes later, he was free of the contraption and eating a meal full of greens and a slice of meatloaf. For hospital food it actually wasn't that bad. The nurse stayed with him as he ate, sometimes recalling stories of others that had been treated in the same room. All ended mostly well, and one was even funny enough to make him snort a pea up his nose. That hadn't been expected, by him or the nurse; who patted his back and retrieved a tissue while he berated himself for laughing so easily.

Twenty minutes after, he stepped out of his numbered room and traipsed the expansive area outside it. A few nurses and doctors walked around, checking into other doors and the patients beyond them. It was obvious due to the lack of hustle that this wasn't the Emergency Room. But it wasn't exactly a rest area, either. The staff kept too close an eye out on everybody.

Satoshi explored, finding nothing unexpected for a hospital. The atmosphere was the same as any with its clean, yet slightly cold impression. It wasn't homey, but it wasn't hostile. Still, sometimes looking into open-room doors wasn't a good thing to do. He could have sworn he saw an old man staring sadly at him, but as he did a double take, the bed proved to be empty. Goosebumps erupted all over his skin and he hurried on.

Finally he found the restrooms. Why did they have to be so far from his room? A large window, settled in the opposite wall down the hallway, caught his interest and he walked to it, finding he wanted to know more about where he was. Turned out he was approximately five stories high. His stomach gave an unexpected flip at the sight of people a ways below. It was weird. When Krad had awaken in him, heights had no longer really effected him. Probably his subconscious had known he'd had nothing to fear because of Krad's wings being practically his own.

He needed to stop thinking like he missed the angel, because he really didn't. Not in any way, shape, or form. Heck, maybe without Krad and the monster's wear on his body, his life would be longer than originally thought.

The horizon outside of the thick window was blocked by tall gray buildings. This didn't look much like Azumano. Where had his father taken him? It was useless trying to gather much information from the nondescript buildings in front of him. And road signs were too far to read – not that he could find any. He gave up, turning for the doors marked for males behind him.

A few minutes later, he was drying his hands with a paper towel and looking in one of the mirrors above the sinks. The nurse hadn't been kidding. His skin color was very healthy, and almost radiant. No longer was it the usual pale; his cheeks had a light dusting of pink. It was strange. He threw the used towel out then leaned forward toward the mirror more. Both his blue eyes looked light and clear, and there were no usual dark bags under them. Krad really had been putting a strain on his body. No wonder the Hikaris had such a short lifespan.

Blinking, he noticed his lips seemed a lot brighter than normal. They stood out, and appeared a bit fuller. Or maybe he was just imagining the change. He wasn't one to often stay in front of a mirror and study himself. Shrugging, he walked out of the restrooms, and right into his father. He stepped back in surprise, being quick to relax his face at the figure standing in front of him.

"Father," he greeted almost calmly, reaching to adjust his glasses before remembering that he didn't have them on. He stopped the habitual motion about halfway. Kei took the opportunity to place Satoshi's glasses into his already lifted hand.

"You don't usually go without these. Are you feeling any better?" Kei asked, swooping Satoshi into a hug. "I'm sorry I couldn't stay with you. An emergency call came in and I had to return to the office. But I have a lot of faith in this hospital – I knew you'd be well taken care of. And the lab below has your test results. You should be present as the doctor goes over them with me." Kei lifted away and Satoshi released his held breath as his father's hand landed on his shoulder to steer him back to his room.

Satoshi fumbled his glasses back on, deciding it best to hide Krad's departure from Kei for as long as he could, or until he knew how his father would react and what he would do about it. Without Krad to keep him "in check", Kei might just make his role at police HQ a little more harder. It was already difficult enough getting facts together on his case with Dark.

"Where is this hospital located?" Satoshi asked, sounding as nice as he could.

"Don't worry, we're not that far from Azumano." His father effortlessly dodged the question. Satoshi forced himself not to scowl. It was always so pointless to ask his father anything. Kei let him go when they entered the numbered room. The nurse from before, Clair, was already there, straightening things up for the last part of his stay. She glanced cheerily at him while she wheeled a small cart past. She hesitated, her smile turning downwards a fraction. Satoshi knew she'd spotted the difference in him now that his father was near.

Satoshi nodded at her, hoping she'd continue on. She did. But not without pausing to give his arm a small, reassuring squeeze. "I hope to see you again. I mean... Erm... I didn't mean... That is, I hope that you don't have to come back to the hospital."

He gave her a small smile and she smiled back, also giving Kei a respectable bow before exiting. Kei didn't respond to her in any way, and Satoshi knew that he didn't like her. He probably thought that she was incompetent just because of her stumbling over her wording.

The two sat and waited for the doctor. He didn't take long. The graying man knocked and came in carrying Satoshi's chart on a clipboard.

"I'm Cami," he introduced strongly, but with a friendly air. "It's a pleasure to see you again, Mr. Hiwatari." He strode over to Kei and shook his hand.

"It's good to see you again, too." Kei smiled as if greeting an old friend. Satoshi figured that they at least knew each other well on a business level. Possibly personally, although he'd never heard of a Cami before. Not that that meant much.

"I know you are a very busy man, so I'll get right to the point," Cami said, turning a few pages on the clipboard in his hand. "Just to let you know right now, the blood work came back good, but I'm a little worried about your son's development." Cami's expression hardened a bit, and Kei's quickly followed suit. Satoshi's brows pinched together as he stared over at Cami and his clipboard.

"Why?" Kei demanded.

"Since we weren't sure what made your son sick, we ran many thorough tests on the blood. All results came back clear, but we found that his testosterone, androsterone, and dehydroandrosterone levels are lower then they should be, and his estrogen levels are high. There are also traces of estradiol, estrone, and estriol; which are hormones that belong to women only. I've never come across this problem before, not in a male that wasn't taking hormonal supplements in order to undergo a surgery to change genders."

Father and son's eyes widened. Their gazes both held shocked surprise as they turned to stare at each other, then back at the doctor searchingly.

Cami cleared his throat a bit before continuing. "Mr. Hiwatari, you've given us all of Satoshi's medical history. I know that he hasn't been given any of these supplements, but I'm not sure how a perfectly healthy boy, already going through puberty, can suddenly start making the wrong kinds of hormones, and I'm worried. This is a very important time in a person's life, development wise. If something isn't done to correct this soon, it could bring major and permanent repercussions."

Satoshi yanked off his glasses and hunched over some, firmly gripping the bridge of his nose. Talk about having your body betray you! His cheeks had never felt so hot in embarrassment. He was a growing boy, not one of those girls that flocked after one! Satoshi wasn't a sexist, but he appreciated his masculinity.

"What do you purpose we do, doctor?" Kei spoke up. The unusual waver in his voice spoke volumes of how much this news had thrown him off tether.

"I recommend taking male hormone supplements to counteract what's going on. It may even throw everything back into proper working gear. However, it could pose a potential side effect. Nothing serious, just a bit of nausea. Course, I'd like to keep an eye on him and run some future tests. If you'll speak with Julie at the main desk, she'll give you a slip for the next available appointment."

By the time the doctor was finished speaking, Satoshi had his face buried in his hands. He could only imagine what the 'future tests' would be.

The ride home, or rather, to his apartment, was blurry. Satoshi never did find out where the hospital was located. To be honest, he didn't really care at the moment. He just wanted to figure out why his body was deciding it wanted to be female. Mix-ups like this usually fixed itself while the child was still in its mother's womb. How could this possibly be happening now? And why?

He didn't react when his father hugged him again and left him with some rare words of assurance. Satoshi was too far in the back of his mind to notice. Once his front door closed, the noise and the abrupt silence was enough to rouse him to walk to his living room chair. He sat in it almost cautiously and passed the next few hours just staring across the room and out one of the blind-free windows.

Night came, and with it, knocks at his door. Satoshi jumped. His face held red marks from where his cheek had rested against the knuckles of his hand for so long. He grumbled slightly, angry that he hadn't figured out any answers to his bizarre day, and shuffled over to the front door. As he opened it, a hand came close to knocking against his chest. The hand belonged to none other than Niwa, whom quickly retracted it, seeing as the door opened a fraction to reveal one side of his friend staring mutely at him.

"Hiwatari!" Daisuke squeaked. "I came by to check on you and to give you today's homework."

Satoshi didn't say anything in return, just disappeared behind the big door and pulled it the rest of the way open. Daisuke took the hint to step into the apartment. As was habit, he looked around before placing a small stack of papers down. The place reminded him of someone that worked too much. There were many important documents and folders around a desktop computer and on the small coffee table, but other than that, it was pretty barren. Definitely a guy's place, although cleaner than most. Almost too clean. The snap of a lock made him turn around. Satoshi looked at him in the eyes for all of two seconds before he stared at the carpeted floor. The gesture of avoidance was made more unusual by the furrowed brow and slightly glazed eyes.

"Was the trip to the hospital bad?" Daisuke asked worriedly.

Satoshi's head snapped up. The look on his face told Daisuke that he'd overstepped his boundaries before the other even spoke.

"How did you know about that?"

"I-I went looking for you in the nurse's office at school. She told me. I was worried..." Daisuke hung his head some, hoping he wasn't in trouble with the other teen. Azure eyes narrowed at him, but looked away as Satoshi moved on into his kitchen. Daisuke took that as a good enough sign to follow.

"You seem a bit edgy. Don't tell me the doctor gave you bad news..."

"I'M NOT-!" Satoshi spun around and yelled, catching himself once Daisuke about flew out of his skin. The blue-haired teen took a deep breath and leaned against a wall, suddenly void of much energy. "I'm sorry, but I don't want to talk about it." Daisuke slowly relaxed, only to tense up again.

"But, you are okay, aren't you?" The redhead's genuine worry made Satoshi smile some.

"I'll be fine, but I want to ask about you."

"Eh?" Daisuke colored some. "I'm good." The redhead rubbed the back of his neck.

So that meant Dark hadn't been affected by Krad's departure. Did the kaito even know his opposite was gone? If not, did it mean that Krad hadn't truly left? Satoshi didn't want to go farther with questions. He wasn't ready to reveal any of the day's events, but strangely, he thought he might go mad if he was left alone to think anymore. All his thinking earlier had done him no good in handling his situation. Walking to his cupboards, he pulled down two cups.

"Would you like some tea?"

Daisuke walked the rest of the way into the kitchen, stopping at the table. "Yes, please." The redhead nodded along with his words. Was it just him being paranoid with his situation, or was Daisuke looking at him differently? Satoshi shook himself some as the Wing Tamer pulled out a chair for himself. He was just being paranoid. There wasn't anything physically different on the outside. ...Yet.

"To be honest, you look better than ever."

Satoshi, who was taking two teabags out of a little decorated box, dropped the box and all its contents to the floor. Teabags scattered by his feet as he gave Daisuke a purely shocked expression. Daisuke cringed at his words as he rocketed up to gather the spilled items. "I didn't mean it like that!" he nearly shouted while on his knees before Satoshi, who fought not to back up a step.

"Then... how did you mean it?" As Daisuke looked up at him, he thought of how weird he must sound. Like he'd expected the redhead to... care for him more than in the friendly way. "Sorry... The reason I ask is because today decided to twist on me more than a little bit." Satoshi actually appeared somewhat sheepish.

Something really did happen with him today. "You just don't seem as stressed."

Satoshi wanted to laugh. He was definitely stressed. And now he didn't feel right with Daisuke in his apartment. Was it because he'd been told his body was trying to act like a girl's? Does your body affect how you feel around a person?

Satoshi's eyes went wide.

Does your body decide your sexual preference?

"Oh, God!" Satoshi's hand covered his mouth in shock.

"What? Are you okay!" Daisuke suddenly stood, not six inches from Satoshi to look at him directly in his eyes. Personal space invaded, and mind whirling, Satoshi backed up into his counter.

"I-it's nothing! I'm j-just going to b-be sick!"

Satoshi roughly pushed past Daisuke, practically running for his bathroom. He knew he probably seemed so pathetic to the redhead right then, but what did it matter? His vision blurred and he felt something wet trail down one cheek. Why was he crying! Getting more confused by the second, and dizzy, Satoshi wiped at his eyes with his sleeve. He didn't clear his vision in time to avoid slamming into the closed bathroom door. He felt like such a fool.

"Satoshi!" Daisuke almost ran down the hall after his friend, but Satoshi disappeared behind the bathroom door and threw it closed.

"I'm fine! Just go away, please!" Satoshi slid down on the opposite side of the door, hugging his knees with one arm, the other busily rubbing his nose. It felt broken, though it wasn't bleeding.

Daisuke felt stricken. What kind of friend was he if he wasn't wanted when the other clearly needed comfort? Hanging his head, Daisuke almost whispered, "I want to help."

"NO!" The refusal rang out strongly. Daisuke jerked, a bit in shock at the vehemence in the voice. Hurt, Daisuke quietly made to leave the apartment. Satoshi heard the front door shut and felt he could breathe again. But with his breath came a weight. He hiccuped once and found himself holding his breath. Water was gathering in his eyes, but he'd never been one to let himself cry.

-)*(-

A/N: Satoshi has got it rough with two sets of hormones bouncing.

I ask whoever is interested in this story continuing to let me know how I did this chapter. Something is just not striking me as right about it, but I'm not sure what it is and I've delayed updating for this reason long enough. I'd appreciate any constructive thoughts.

Intelligenceisstupid: Thanks for being here and laughing with me on this. ^_^

Sapphiet: You're insane (in a good way) with your energy. I never know what you're going to say. ...Hopefully it'll be good for this chapter.

Sneeze Powdered Moth: O_O DANG! I think we covered everything in private. XD

franxie: You're just totally awesome! I'm glad for all the chats we've had. ^_^

Lady Fai: I hope I haven't let your patience down.