The Revenge of Jusenkyo Chapter 6: Happosai, a ranma fanfic

The Revenge of Jusenkyo

~Noy Telinú~

Warning: this is fanfiction. As you can see on this site, this is fanfiction. Fanfiction. Of course it's not perfect. And since it's made by a fan… then don't use it as a canon source. Capisce?

Caution: this involves living Jusenkyo water. Oh and many, many cursed people. Sometimes people forget that. Yeah, I know. I remember, and I'm the text!

Complainers: complain, and stuff. Well, Noy says this story isn't suppose to be serious like the others, in fact it is a parody. so... Yeah, I know I've been trying to tell Noy, but its hard too. Now read. if you think it sucks, then complain, Noy can take it. That and you can't please everyone, oh well. This is a weak plot, but, then again, it is about living Jusenkyo water getting revenge by cursing people. You read it not me! THE ALL MIGHTY TEXT HAS NO NEED FOR READING! Whoops... uh... IGNORE THIS STATEMENT! And everything...

You have been warned…

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Chapter 5: Happosai

While Ranma was trying to catch living water, Happosai was trying to figure out what happened to him.

'Ok, uh, paws… uh oh. That was Jusenkyo water? Ranma, you shall pay! Wait… if I'm an animal… it gets me closer to the ladies.' Happosai's huge eyes went wider, filled with mischievous glee.

"Ehhh!" went Happosai, the furry animal.

Seeing a group of girls, he used his new-found cuteness into action.

"So I said… Ackkkkahakk!" Shrieked one of the girls.

"Huh? What is it- Oh my GAHHHHHHAHAHAKK! Run away! Run away!" another shouted, and the whole group of girls saw the animal on the ground as well, screaming as they ran for their lives.

'Huh? That's not how it's supposed to go. Oh well, must be scared girls. Heh, that's redundant anyways. Oh look, a pretty lady!'

Happosai jumped over to his next target, landing in front of her, only to get a similar result.

"Ackk! Get away, get away!" the woman ran off, shrieking.

"What's her problem?" A man asked; only to see the animal in question. "Just, back away, really slow like everyone. Don't scream, it'll just scare it."

Everyone in the area saw the animal and likewise backed away, except for some girls, who screamed and ran away as fast as they could.

'What's going on? They should adore me, not run away!' Happosai jumped and leaped towards the nearest female.

"Gahhh! Get away! Nnnoo. No!" the woman gagged and pushed the animal off of her.

"Animal control! What's the number for animal control?" a man called out.

'Why is everyone avoiding me? I'm only a cute animal!'

"Ehhehe!" Happosai squeaked in his best cute voice.

Everyone just ran for the hills.

'Alright, what am I that females hate so much…' he looked in the store window, his reflection showing. 'No… Nooooooo! Curse you Ranma!'

Ranma felt a chill go up her back for some reason. Ignoring it, she tried to figure out a way to capture the water.

Akane, who was asleep on Ranma's shoulder, picked that time to wake up. "Eekk?"

This startled Ranma enough to almost lose her balance. "Akane! You're awake!"

"Ea*yawn* kk…. Ek… Ekkkekkek!" Akane shouted when she realized where she was.

"Hey, you latched onto me! Now stop it! The Jusenkyo water is right there!"

Akane, who saw the puddle moving with her own eyes, jumped off Ranma's shoulder and tried to smother the puddle. Of course it didn't work.

"Eckk!" The puddle reformed out of her hands like the water it is. "Ekk!"

"Akane that doesn't work. I know, I've tried. We need something to catch it in. Uh… Ow!"

"Eckk!" Akane scratched and hit Ranma with her tiny monkey hands. It was more annoying than hurtful for once.

"Akane, stop it! The water is getting away!" Ranma pleaded, talking to a held Akane by the scruff of her neck.

"Ekkk!" Akane protested, wigging around and thrashing in Ranma's grasp.

Akane was let down as the two chased after the water.

"HeeheheheheHE!" laughed hyena Soun.

"Growlf!" replied Genma the giant panda.

"He-he. HEheeeehehe!" laughed Soun as he pointed behind Genma.

Genma turned around, not finding anything.

While his back was turned, Soun rearranged the pieces of the Shogi game.

"Gewolf!" Genma protested, seeing the tables turned.

"He hee hee he he!" Soun shrugged.

[Look!] Flip [Its Akane!] The panda sign read.

Soun turned around to see no one. While that was happening, Genma rearranged the pieces.

"He heee hehehe!" Soun pouted.

"Growlef gowlf." Genma answered.

"Father, Mr. Saotome, would you like some tea?" Kasumi the Angel asked.

[Yes please!] flip [Tendo?]

"Ha!"

[He wants some too.]

"Alright, dinner shall be ready soon. Thank you for helping father through this." Kasumi smiled.

[Hey] flip [What are friends for?] flip. [Look, it's the master!]

Soun the hyena turned around only to find Nodoka instead.

"Grealff!" Genma panicked.

"Husband? Why are you playing with a hyena?" Nodoka asked, sword at the ready.

[I'm just a cute little Panda!]

"That doesn't work; I know it's you." Nodoka frowned.

[Sorry.] Flip [I forgot.]

"Have you seen Ranma anywhere? And why are you playing with a hyena?"

"Auntie Saotome! How was your trip?" an angelic Kasumi asked.

"Kasumi?" Nodoka asked, eyes widening, and looking up, way up.

"Yes auntie, would you like some tea as well? Here you go Father, Mr. Saotome." Kasumi was still smiling.

"Wha- how?" Nodoka gathered herself. "How did this happen?"

"Oh my! It was the magical Jusenkyo water that came in the mail. Now it's after everyone in Nerima." Kasumi looked concerned.

"It?"

"Oh yes. The Jusenkyo water is alive. It was in a package addressed to Mr. Saotome. Miss Jusenkyo said it came here to punish those who harmed its children. Ranma and Akane are after it now. Tea?"

"Ranma is going after it? Akane as well?" Nodoka looked sick. "Is Akane cursed as the rest of you? Oh, and yes, I need some tea right now." Nodoka sat at the table.

"Here you go Auntie, oh, and this is the book that came with the water, the people cursed so far are written next to their curse." Kasumi smiled

Nodoka flipped through it and was amazed at the curses that were in it. After a while, she found out that Kasumi was splashed by the spring of drowned Diathim that came from the moons of Iego. Another one that was found was Soun the Hyena, Nabiki the fox, and Akane…

"Oh my!" Nodoka did her Kasumi impression. "This will help my son. Ooh and she is so cute! A Capuchin monkey! How exotic!"

Happosai, meanwhile, was sulking in his situation. Out of all the animals to be cursed to turn into, this one was down there among the worst. If not the worst.

"Eehh!" groaned Happosai. This was not a good day.

Maybe Ranma won't mind being fondled.

'Oh look! There she is now! I will get you!'

Happosai jumped in front of Ranma and Akane, unintentionally letting the Jusenkyo water get away.

"EekkE!" Akane clutched her nose and jumped on Ranma.

"Hey! It's the old freak! It's your fault! You angered Jusenkyo! Ackk get away!" Ranma ran the other way as Happosai followed after her.

The Jusenkyo water was annoyed by what just happened, worse, Nodoka wasn't in her home, so it turned to its next target, which it finally got to.

The cat café already has two cursed animals, why not three?

'Cologne, you will be punished for sure!' Jusenkyo thought as it slipped under the door.

"Shampoo! Closing time!" Cologne shouted from the back.

"Yes great grandmother!" Shampoo responded.

"Shampoo! Would you go on a date with me?" Mousse asked a table.

Shampoo sighed. "Stupid Mousse."

The water ignored the beat down; instead, it slithered into the kitchen where Cologne was.

"Mr. Part time forgot a spot." Cologne sighed as she got a rag to clean up the water that appeared in her kitchen.

She only realized too late that it was no ordinary water when it jumped up her arm.

Dinner was about to start when Ranma, with Akane on her shoulder, jumped into the Tendo yard.

"There, I think we lost him… oh… hi mom." Ranma scratched the back of her head nervously as she saw her mom and everyone else at the table, right before they started eating.

"Boy! Get in here!" Genma shouted.

"You are just in time, son." Nodoka greeted the two.

"Exactly as planned." Nabiki said.

"Whaa! My daughter's still a monkey!" Soun cried, again… typical.

"Oh my! You are just in time, Ranma, Akane. I have hot water here. Oh, and Akane, here are your clothes. Dinner's ready!" A human Kasumi smiled. Life was unpredictable again.

Ranma just blinked and headed off to the bathroom with Akane.

They got back right before Happosai showed up.

"Eeheh!" the little guy squealed.

"Ahhh!" Akane, Ranma, and Nabiki screamed.

"Boy! Stop acting like a girl and take care of the skunk!" Genma commanded.

"That's no moon… err… Skunk! That's a Happosai" Akane yelled as it jumped towards her chest, only to be batted away, through the roof, twinkle in the sky.

"The master's a skunk!" Soun didn't cry. "Oh, happy day Saotome! Things might not be bad after all!"

"Yes it is, Tendo, yes it is." Genma agreed.

"Stupid old freak had it coming." Ranma agreed as he sat down.

"Oh my! I hope grandfather's alright. Girls don't like skunks." Kasumi looked thoughtful.

"Who does, sis? Now let's eat. I want to use my hands for something while I still got them." Nabiki stated as she dug in.

Everyone else shrugged as they ate.

Author's notes: yes, a skunk. It's so perfect! Mwhahaha! Good one Noy! So, for those keeping score, Ranma is a girl(duh) Genma is a panda (double duh) Akane is a special Capuchin monkey,(guess) Nabiki is a red fox, Kasumi is a diathim, (Star wars angel) Soun is a spotted hyena, and Happosai is a skunk. Up next is Cologne, what should she be? To find out, tune in next time for the next installment of… The Revenge of Jusenkyo! When will that be? Who knows? It's Noy. Until Noy decides to update this... thing... I'm the text.