A big thank you to Faegoddess who inspired the end of this chapter with her review...Disclaimer...Not Mine...Hope you enjoy the chapter...Please review when you get to the bottom...

EPOV

By this stage, Beehl had silently made it back up the stairs, and into the bedroom. He must've snuck up on Sookie and put his hand over her mouth because the next thing I heard was a muffled scream and about 20 seconds later a huge piercing noise filled the air.

SPOV

As soon as I felt the hand come around my mouth, I immediately jumped, turned around and kneed the person (who turned out to be a still naked Bill) in the balls. And I wasn't even sorry. He deserved it after what he has done on me. And Lorena still hadn't moved from the bed. Except she had. She was now standing in front of me. Almost as if it was in slow motion, she raised her hand and struck me as hard as she could against the side of the face. I fell straight to the floor, but not before I got a chance to grab onto her shins. She fell too. Right on top of me, and as I was standing so close to the unit that had formerly contained Bill's clothes, she cut her lip. Blood poured everywhere, and the next thing I noticed was that Bill had passed out from the sight of the blood. Hilarious. Even after 5 years of being together – and we were married for 3 years. I still found that the fact he couldn't handle any blood at all was laughable. It really was.

The next thing that I realised was that Lorena was no longer lying on top of me but was being carried, just like a sack of spuds downstairs by Eric and, to my knowledge was dumped outside. Naked. And it had just started raining. Like monsoon raining. It was literally bouncing 3 inches off of the ground. And she was out in it. Naked. Brilliant. I shouted down the stairs to Eric to tell him to lock the door, in order for to keep her out. I was nasty.

But I had bigger problems, than Lorena Krasiki right now. My soon to be ex husband was currently lying unconscious on my (note: my not our) bedroom floor. What devilment could I do on him before he regained consciousness? It was then that I spotted the permanent markers lying on the top of the dressing table. What they were doing lying there I will never know but just at that moment, I had never been more grateful that they were. I sauntered over to the dressing table, picked up the black one (it was the one that would stand out the most against Bill's ice cold, snow white skin – he worked with computers and stayed indoors all the time), and walking back over towards Bill. I sat down on the floor beside him and took the lid off of the pen, before writing on his forehead, in the smallest, neatest writing I could possibly manage and wrote "Hi, my name is Bill Compton and I have a black dick, it is 2 cm long , have moobs and am the worlds first pregnant man."

Just then another idea struck me. I quickly moved down Bill's body, past his neck, his moobs, his pregnant stomach and then finally down to his 2 cm dick, which I took the marker to, and coloured it in. All 2 cm of it.

Just as I was colouring the last spot in, Eric appeared in the bedroom.

"Sookie, what the fuck are you doing?" he asked, flabbergasted.

"I'm getting revenge...right now I'm finished...now...out he goes...I'm gonna need you to help me Eric" I stated.

"Sure" he answered. "You know the cheating bastard deserves more than this Sookie – I mean, come on, all you have done on him is burn his clothes, , colour in his dick, write on his forehead and now you are going to dump him outside naked through a rainstorm."

Wow...I didn't guess...it sounded like a lot when Eric put it like that. When I didn't reply, Eric suddenly burst out laughing.

"What's so funny?" I asked him

"I does sound like a lot whenever you put it like that that doesn't it" he blurted out between laughs. The next thing I knew we were both laughing like loons. However, before Eric got a chance to move Bill, he came around.

"Sookie, I love you please...you have to understand...I love you...It wasn't me you saw...please..."

That just set me off laughing again. I had to double over in two holding my stomach because I was laughing so hard. Eric was in a similar shape. The next thing that I knew, Pam and Amelia were standing in the doorway.

"What the fuck is going on here?" Pam asked.

I couldn't even speak I was laughing that hard. It was Eric who had to fill Pam and Amelia in on what was happening. By the time he was finished, I could just about stand up straight and stop laughing.

I turned to Bill, who was still lying on the floor and said "Seriously, Bill...that's your excuse...It wasn't me...I catch you fucking that whore in our marital bed and you have the balls to say 'it wasn't me'. What exactly is it that you are smoking?"

"Wait a second" Amelia spoke softly, "He said it wasn't him..and you caught him. That is just hilarious."

"If you say so Ames" Pam answered before stepping forward before stepping forward and sticking her 6 inch heels (Pam always wears at least a 5 inch heel wherever she is) straight into his ball sack.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" Bill screamed in agony. He deserved it. He cheated on me. Even Eric had moved to cover his own baby maker. It really did look that painful. But Pam wasn't finished yet. Oh no. She bent down and slowly picked him up by the penis, took him down the stairs, still by the dick and led him outside, came back into the house and marched up the stairs. She didn't seem impressed. Not one bit.

"I always knew that he was a cheating bastard Sookie. Why you stayed with him for so long is a mystery to me...OH MY GOD...WHY IS THERE BLACK PERMANENT MARKER ALL OVER MY HANDS?"

"Come on everybody I need a drink" Eric quickly suggested "Lets go to Valhalla." Thank God somebody had their head screwed on. I didn't need another Pam tantrum. I just couldn't be dealing with it right now.

Like no like? What did you think? Did you like the scene with the marker? No? Review...Review...Please (I sound like Creepy Compton don't I)