Parker continued to rub at his battered face as he left the building, his eyes wandering hopelessly down the street. He was certainly worse off than before now, this he realized as he glanced at his watch; hours had passed and Sara would be past worried about him by now.

He had no idea where John, or maybe the demon that possessed his cousin, had taken the entire gang. Since Parker wasn't a member of the secret group and hadn't been for some time, that put his ability to find out where they had moved somewhere in the range of negligible.

As he returned home Parker ranged from abject misery over his failure to think about the implications of tossing the demon artifact on to his cousin to horrible worry over what might have befallen his own blood on account of his own selfish actions.

He had wanted to be rid of the cloak and all the demons it represented both literal and figurative, and he hadn't thought twice about what that would mean to John. Parker paused and slammed his hand into a brick wall in frustration, unmindful of the blossoming pain.

Trying to get his breathing under control, Parker allowed his mind to be occupied with what he would tell Sara had happened here…

Parker told Sara what had happened, merely changing the location that the homeless men had assaulted him to the alley outside of the drug store. He lied that he had stolen one of the men's guns, using the story as an easy way to keep the weapon. No more hiding it in the toilet tank.

With his face bruised and one eye swollen shut, plus his bleeding hand, it wasn't hard to convince Sara to let him keep the sidearm in case something similar happened in the future, though she was concerned about keeping a gun in the house with the baby.

Parker felt a pang of guilt and eased her mind, "I'll get one of those gun cases with a lock on it for when I don't have it on me."

Later at work Parker had to deal with the unexpected visitation of every Avenger who called the mansion home. He mentally face-palmed as he realized that he had chosen to go with a mugging story when every vigilante there stopped by to wish him recovery and ask details so that they could hunt down the evil men who had hurt one of their own.

Alone at last toward the end of the day and finally caught up on phone calls (ironic, as he had taken this job to get away from phone work) Parker sat in contemplation of the fact that these people felt him to be one of them. He certainly didn't feel like a hero, and every time he told Wolverine where he had been mugged, he had gotten the sense that the other man had known he was lying.

If that didn't make him feel like shit, having the genuine concern of pretty much everyone drove the nail into the proverbial coffin. Parker sighed and tried to put it out of his mind. Instead he turned his thoughts to what he would need to do to make things right again.

The only way he was going to find out where John went was going to be to talk to or follow one of the other members of the gang, and that could only happen after one of them had committed a crime so he would know where to start. Fortunately for Parker, his job meant he did nothing but monitor police dispatch, as well as more advanced gear that Tony had built that Parker didn't understand but which somehow predicted criminal movements.

All that was left was to sit back and wait. Parker sat in the dark long after he could have gone home, listening to the radio noise; waiting had never been so hard.

Time passed, and each day that went by marked itself with worry and regret for Parker. It had not occurred to him that he had personally made his group this efficient; they never stayed at a crime scene long enough for the police to respond, and even Tony's advanced gear was too slow for their strikes.

Months passed, and the slow grind of time might have increased the hopeless feeling and desperation in Parker's soul, but he learned to deal with it by focusing completely on the task of listening intently to his equipment for any sign of activity.

Many times he would stay until he fell asleep on his console, and he constantly assured Sara that he was just putting in long hours for the overtime, despite her objections that they didn't need the money that badly.

Before Parker knew it everyone around him was happily decorating the mansion with the bright greens and reds of Christmas. He watched as Avengers and the other staff worked to erect holly and wreaths and before he knew it he had a cordial invitation to attend a party with the others.

"No way, we would stick out in a group full of crazies that dress up in spandex costumes." Parker wore an irritable frown as he stated this.

Sara gave him a reproachful look, "Don't be such a grump; they are your friends and you'd be an awful father to keep your baby away from that huge glittering tree you were telling me about."

Parker raised an eyebrow at her, "And I'm sure the free food and rich atmosphere don't sway you at all."

Sara swatted his arm playfully, "You know I've always wanted to go to one of these ritzy ball things! Stop being such a jerk and treat your ladies right!"

Parker gave her a brooding look, "Fine."

Tony spared no expense in making the grand ballroom of the Avenger's mansion sing with a myriad colored lights and a live band that played soothing Christmas jazz music. People of all background filled the place, as the families of every Avenger and their friends talked, danced and joked among themselves.

Parker looked around, a little awed despite having spent so long under Tony's employ. He had never had any reason to be in this particular room, and its vastness would astonish anyone. He watched as celebrities mingling with politicians and delegates from other countries who flew in just to attend Tony's esteemed party.

The oddest thing Parker found about it though was that persons dressed in full dress suits hobnobbed with obviously less well-off persons in simpler pants and t-shirt, and no one thought out of place. Parker supposed that with the costumed people walking around, nothing else could really seem weird.

The centerpiece of the entire event though was the enormous tree that dominated the center of the room, its rich display of glowing lights and reflecting ornaments a sight to behold. Parker took Briana and Sara over to it and the three of them stared up at in in quiet wonder.

Everyone came by to greet Parker, absolutely everyone; the Avengers to a man, and their friends and families, tons of people Parker didn't even know talking to him as if he were an old friend. Parker spoke at length to both Clint and Luke, but otherwise remained aloof, letting Briana play with the other children as he sat at the bar having a drink.

Sara approached him shortly after he sat, "What's wrong, Parker?"

Parker shrugged, "Nothing, I'm fine."

Sara shook her head, "You're moping; I know that look when I see it. What's bothering you?"

Parker waved off the notion, "Nothing's bothering me; I, uh, just don't feel well. Maybe it was something I ate last night."

Sara raised an eyebrow as her eyes tracked the glass in his hand, "And you're going to settle your stomach with bourbon?"

Parker smiled winningly, "Solves all illnesses according to my family; you know dad, he believed a scotch could fix any malady."

Sara's smile was tainted by a bit of worried frown, "Well, I hope you don't pick up too many of your father's sayings, seeing what I've heard so far."

Parker nodded assent, "Yeah, I'll stop at two."

Sara smiled and kissed his cheek, then moved on to seek new friends. Parker watched her with a sad smile, hating that he couldn't just tell her the truth.

The reason he was so despondent was the same as always lately, with the twist that John wouldn't be sharing the holiday with him, likely because he was in one form or the other dead.

Parker jumped to a strong hand on his shoulder and he turned to see Steve Rogers had snuck up on him. Steve gave him a nod and sat on the stool next to his. "Your daughter is a handful! It never ceases to amaze what energy children have, does it?"

Parker nodded, smiling wanly, "Yeah, you especially enjoy it when it comes to bedtime."

Steve laughed, "Well, life is full of its mixed blessings. Before you know it she'll be moving out and you'll wonder where the baby went."

Parker glanced over at Steve, "You've had kids, Captain?"

Steve shook his head while waving away the title, "Please, call me Steve, and no, I have just had the pleasure of listening to the accounts of close friends and my own observations. I don't know if raising kids is something I would want to do in this line of work."

Parker nodded, somehow having known Steve would say that. He sipped at his drink, wondering when Steve would wander away and leave him to his thoughts, but when he looked over again, the other man was watching him intently, "Something wrong?"

Steve shook his head, "I hope not! It's Christmas, everyone should be happy on this holiday… so why do you look so blue over here by yourself?"

Parker grunted, a little annoyed; his girlfriend he had expected to pick up on his despondency, but Captain Care-bear he could do without. "It's nothing, just feeling a little ill. I'm sure it'll blow over by tomorrow."

Parker had looked away as he spoke, but when he glanced over at Steve, he saw the other man had a curious expression on his face, "Well, I hope you feel better soon, then."

Parker nodded, letting his eyes set on Briana who was playing on a mat set out for the smallest children. She smashed blocks together as another little girl did the same next to her and they both laughed. Parker smiled, feeling a little better already.

Later on they exchanged presents, Parker feeling a little disjointed by his rather small donation to the huge table laden with gifts. He shrugged to himself as he placed his offerings there; this was Tony's party, after all, and he hazarded the guess that most of the presents were from him.

Sure enough, Tony had bought most of the gifts, but Parker noticed that most everyone else had gotten everyone else something, even if it was something small, or a gag, like the plethora of combs that a begrudging Login received.

Parker was amazed to see that almost every avenger had gotten him a gift, and even more amazing was that the gifts he received were things that he had spoken of in the past. They were mostly small gifts; like a watch, likely because he was often late to work and claimed it was because he lost track of time, thank-you Tony.

He also received a belt, which he knew without asking that Janet had gotten him, since she had complained that his pants were too loose and disdained seeing his underwear. There were also many gifts for the baby, among them things he had mentioned she had broken at home to Luke.

One gift caught his eye, though, as it looked far too large considering he still didn't know these people that well. No one had a card on it, and Parker opened the brightly wrapped box with growing curiosity. Inside laid a brand new electric piano.

Parker glanced around at all of those present, boggled by the gift. He had never mentioned that he played the piano to even one of these people, was it just a lucky guess? No, the fact that his own keyboard had died was a fact that he also hadn't shared, and it was far too much of a coincidence to overlook.

Parker threw a look sideways at Sara and saw the guilt there immediately, "Okay, so who did you tell that I play the electric piano to?" He smiled, "You know you're hurting my man's man reputation, right?"

Clint stepped in on her behalf, smiling, "Okay, I admit I badgered your wife shamelessly to tell me what you would like for Christmas."

Parker looked at her again, a little astonished, "You told him to get me a keyboard? These things are expensive!"

Sara shook her head vehemently, "No! I told Clint a long list of things you might like and he just chose the biggest one!"

Clint laughed at Parker's expression, "Don't sweat it buddy; I think if you can jam on one of these things it's the least I can do to help. If you really want to make it up to me buy me another drink."

Janet piped in at that, "Or he can give you the one he has, since he's underage anyways."

A few people laughed and Parker gave her scowl an annoyed look, then handed the beverage over to Clint, "Yes, mom."

That evoked more laughter and Parker found himself smiling again.

It happened too fast for Parker to respond. Over and over again for months he had told himself what to do and prepared for the night that it happened.

But when he finally picked up the broadband message that one of the Hood's crew had moved into his radar it was already over.

A large portion of the gang had been captured and put into custody by a concerted effort on the part of the Avengers, and suddenly Parker wished he had tried to talk to them or spied on them or something, so that he would have been aware of what was going to happen.

Parker rushed to the scene, which was actually the Raft; a high security prison for powerful criminals, whether mutant or meta-human or mystical. Parker could only assume that they had come here to liberate their colleagues, as was the way his gang was operated.

The Raft was incredibly secure to begin with, though, and the Avengers being aware of the attempt pushed the gang's chances of not simply being added to its prisoners in a marginal level. Likely a rat had tipped the authorities or the vigilantes and spelled doom for the attempt.

Parker moved over to where he saw Janet speaking with a few men in uniform. Those men tensed when they saw Parker walking up, and Janet motioned for them to relax. She turned to him, her face neutral, "What is it, Parker?"

Parker nodded to her, "I, uh, figured I'd come down and figure out what happened, since what I could pick up back at the mansion was kinda blotchy. I see that you guys already knew about it, though; did you catch them?"

Janet said goodbye to the other men then walked a short distance away before turning to face Parker with serious eyes, "You're not fooling anyone,

Parker. Now tell me why you really came."

Parker frowned deeply, "One of the guys in that gang is still family, okay? I just want to make sure he isn't hurt." He knew that what she knew about him blew his innocent bystander facade out of the water, so Parker figured he might as well tell her some of the truth.

Janet nodded, relaxing visibly, "Yes, I know John King is your cousin, and yes he is healthy and safe. Steven Strange figured out how to track the cloak that gives him his powers."

Parker froze, watching how Janet carefully studied him, "Then you knew…"

Janet nodded again, "I know that you gave John your cloak; an incredibly stupid move that I wasn't sure of until just now, but we can talk about it later.

For now just turn around and leave, okay Parker?"

Parker bit his tongue, caught in a whirlpool of mixed emotions, "I-I can't just leave him like this, there are some things Steven should know about that cloak."

Janet watched him a moment more, then sighed, "Fine, Parker; you can talk to Steven, but don't think that I'm going to let you get anywhere near any of the members of that gang or the cloak."

Parker scowled at her, "What, you don't trust me? After all this time, you think that way about me?"

Janet shook her head, "It's not that simple, just be happy I'm fighting my better judgment because I do trust you and am letting you stay here to talk to Steven. Don't make me regret this, Parker."

After a long discussion with Steven about the nature of the cloak, Parker realized that he hadn't known anything at all about it. Apparently, the garment had been enchanted by a very powerful demon named Dormammu, and all of its mystical might had been designed to spy on the denizens of the earth.

Steven was intrigued as to how Parker knew what he did about the cloak and he glanced over at Janet, knowing he would have to tell the truth.

Suddenly, Parker felt as if everyone was going to know about it, and he stared at the floor, "Because I've used it before."

Of course, Steven wouldn't let it go at that, and Parker was forced to answer one question after another, feeling more and more annoyed that his mission to help John had turned into him revealing all of his deeply buried secrets to this man he didn't even know.

Finally Parker snapped, "Okay, Janet, you've heard everything Steven here has said about the cloak. Now what you should also know is that I've seen John since I gave up the Hood. Parker went on to tell them about how Dormammu had taken over John's body completely and that the reason that he had been monitoring the radio so much lately was to try and find him.

Steven stared at him in shock, "Why didn't you tell us about this? We could have found him a long time ago."

Janet gave Parker a severe look but put a hand on Steven's shoulder, "He must have been worried, correctly, that his cousin would be going to jail. Come on, Steven, we need to tell this to the others."

Parker stood up suddenly as they turned to leave, "You're just going to throw him in prison when you know he wasn't in control of himself?"

Janet gave Parker a stern look, "Parker, you're getting carried away, alright? You need to step back from this…"

Parker's face became a mask of fury as he shouted at both of them, "I thought you were supposed to help people! No one needs help more than my cuz and you…" Parker turned his baleful stare on Steven, "You know better than to condemn a man for what his did under the spell of this Darma-face or whatever the hell his name is."

Steven gave Parker a scrupulous look then glanced at Janet, who folded her arms over her chest. "Well, I can't vouch for your cousin, Mister Robbins, and I don't think anyone else of us can… would you say his record was unblemished?"

Parker glared still but faltered a little, "Yeah, well…"

Steven nodded, "Yes, I see. You can understand then that we have to approach this in the manner we do because if you have reticence about his choices than we also must assume that he should be handled carefully."

Parker shook his head, "That's not fair! They'll throw him into prison without even giving him a chance… he can't afford any fancy lawyers and his record will doom him!"

Janet shook her head in turn, "Then John's past has injured him; we can't do anything for him there. I can see about getting him a good lawyer, though…"

Parker slammed his hand into the table at his side, rattling its contents in his anger. "You assholes are all the fucking same! It's the same self-righteous bullshit you're spitting now that's gonna sink my cuz into the hole for life. Thanks for nothing!"

Parker pushed past a startled Steven and stormed out of the building, not stopping until he reached the street outside of Steven's home. Parker wasn't sure what he had thought he was going to do. He was powerless to help his cousin, and the fact that he was helpless to fix the damage he had done was the worst thing he had ever felt.

Parker walked away from it all, both the two Avengers he had argued with and everything he had done up until now. What was the point of any of it, after all? Why bother to continue trying to change himself if all he had worked to do was to hurt someone he cared about and still feel like an outsider?

Parker walked until his feet were sore then he continued to walk. He walked until the sun came up and he no longer tracked where he was. His phone rang and he threw it into the sewer, and then continued to walk down the crowded streets. He walked until the streets were no longer crowded and then he paused, the soreness in his legs finally making him consider rest.

Parker looked up dully, noticing he happened to stand outside a small bar that stood at the outskirts of the city, where to travel further would put him into the ocean surrounding the city. Parker thought it fitting that his journey should end here, and went in to get himself a drink.

Parker looked up from where he had been resting his head on his arms to see Steve Rogers had come into the bar and now sat next to him. He grunted, then laid his head back down, "You gonna chase me around every time I have a drink? You know, I'm twenty now, and that's close enough…"

Steve waved off the comment, shaking his head, "Nah, you're old enough to be married and die for your country; who am I to tell you whether you can drink?"

Parker looked up at Steve's smiling face, a little surprised. "Seriously? The guy who mothers tell their children to be more like is telling me I can drink underage… that's awesome."

Steve laughed, "Well, I didn't say I condone it; I just said I won't make that choice for you. I think from what I've seen of you that you're usually the type of mature person I'd be comfortable drinking with."

Parked furrowed his brow, "Usually?"

Steve nodded, "Yes, I think that lately your choices might have been less than wise."

Parker glared at Steve and took his mug of beer, taking a long pull on it before laying his head down again. "I'm sure you'd feel that way. Go the fuck away."

Steve sighed and leaned against the counter, "People have blown my reputation up so much that it can be hard for me to relate to others who don't know me yet, but I can assure you that I've messed up plenty in my own past and I can guess what you're going through."

Parker lifted his head up enough to shoot Steve a baleful look, "You wouldn't have a clue what I've dealt with on a daily basis surviving on the streets; quite frankly, Steve, your shit smells like roses and everyone you've met has done nothing but go out of their way to make your life easier."

Steve frowned at Parker, "Young man, I grew up during the Great Depression, and while I may not have lived through your experiences, I can understand struggle. I fell into glory as Captain America, and all of the hype that came with it, but before that I earned the respect I got with hard work. I went to extremes just to prove I had the mettle to serve my country."

Parker rasped at Steve, getting a glare in return, "Oh no, they wouldn't let me go die for some greedy assholes in office! You're a soldier, which puts you into the spectrum of retards I try not to be like. Okay, you were poor, but how many times did your neighbors pull knives on you? I bet if they had, you would have realized that you have to look after yourself more."

Steve sat up slowly, seeming to collect his thoughts, "All right, I see that you have had too much to drink and are rambling a bit. Perhaps we can continue this conversation tomorrow. Why don't you let me give you a ride back to your home?"

Parker leveled Steve with an angry stare, "How the hell did you find me anyways?"

Steve waved back toward the door, "I didn't have much to go on but the direction you left Steven's from, but it seems you didn't waver from it. So would you like to go home and get some rest?"

Parker frowned, wishing he had thrown a few turns into his march away from Janet. "I'd like you to get the fuck out of my life; I'm not some troubled kid you need to follow around and harass with your philosophy on life."

Steve met his obstinate look and shook his head, "What about Sara and Briana, are you just going to stay out drinking and make them worry?"

Parker grunted, pushing his glass along the counter toward the bartender, who was busy staring at Steve like he might be starting to recognize who he was. "Give me another one."

Steve wouldn't let his question go unanswered, though. "I said, what about your family, Parker? I know you're troubled, I could tell that back at the Christmas party and before that even. But is it important enough to hurt those you love?"

Parker wouldn't look at him, "I hurt the people closest to me no matter what I do." He glanced down, "I think after I get wasted drunk I'm going to go downtown and fuck a whore…" He glanced at Steve, "…then I'm going to do coke until I forget why I went down there."

Steve looked shocked at the honesty in his face when he had said that and Parker laughed at his perceived naiveté. Then Steve's brow came down into a hard look, his jaw set as he nodded, "Okay, then. I see I was wrong to let you keep drinking…"

Parker waved him off, "I'm not even drunk yet, just wait around if you wanna see just how 'depraved' the man is that you thought so worth badgering."

Steve continued his statement regardless, "…but it is clear that you have lost you damned mind. So I'm going to take you back now, because despite how foolish the things you are saying are, I don't think you really want to make these further mistakes."

Parker sighed at him, "I've already told you, I'm not going anywhere with… hey, what are you doing?" Parker looked up annoyed as Steve hauled him to his feet by the arm.

Steve merely set a few bills on the counter as he pulled Parker away from his seat. He turned to the door and literally dragged the other man along with him, Parker realizing now how strong Steve actually was, as the younger man's best efforts were to graze the floor with his feet. "I'm taking you to the Avenger's mansion."

Parker gave him a dour look, "What the hell for? You wanna tell Janet what a mistake I am, that you can't reform a crook?"

Steve gave Parker a surprised look, "A crook? Well, we can talk about that when we get back all you like, because the reason I'm taking you there is so that you can sleep this off and then we can have our talk."

Parker struggled but only end up looking silly flailing in Steve's strong arms, "I'm done fucking talking! Let me go you asshole!"

Parker drew back and slammed his fist into Steve's face, the latter giving him a sad look but not stopping his course, nor showing that the blow had done any real damage. Steve pushed him into his car and then got into the front seat.

Parker pulled on the handle but the door wouldn't open, "You drive a fucking cop car?"

Steve shrugged from where he sat, and Parker could see that bulletproof glass separated them, just like in a police vehicle, even if this glass was harder to see, so clear it was. "I've found it useful in my line of work."

Parker sneered, "Which is bullying people around, it seems. You've got no right to push me like this, motherfucker."

Steve shrugged again, "Maybe not, but I like you and your family, Parker, and I want to see you get your head straight."

Parker leaned back and gave Steve a cold look in the review mirror, "And what exactly are you planning to do, lock me up in the mansion? Locking people up seems to be you guys' answer to anything you can't handle."

Steve shook his head, "Not exactly. You'll see…"