Hikaru did his best to evaluate the girl. Her eyes were unfocused and still as her lips fluttered over half-spoken words. She was murmuring sequence after sequence of possibilities, numbers rolling off her tongue into the palm she held in front of her mouth. She could have been counting if not for the way her nose crinkled in disgust when she began a new sequence. She could have been pretty if not for that revolted expression.
'She hates the game,' Hikaru told Setsuko ruefully, remembering his initial aversion to Go, the way it had so upset Sai. He felt a phantasm of sympathy for his departed friend that he couldn't quite hide from Setsuko, not that he much minded at that point. The spirit knew most of the conscious thoughts and feelings he'd had since meeting her, and she knew most everything about Sai.
She smiled faintly from where she sat behind Yuka, her thoughts tickling his psyche. The fat man seems to enjoy watching her play, she noted, nodding towards Kurata where he sat beside the board. His face radiated amusement and perhaps pride at his niece's determination. Spectral fingers tightened over the ivory handle of the bachi in Setsuko's lap as she too watched Yuka play.
"Yuka-chan, why not stop here?" Hikaru offered after a few agonizing minutes of her muttering.
"Do you surrender then?" she demanded, shooting him a brief glare before resuming her furious muttering. Hikaru tried not to laugh.
'I really don't get her at all,' he commented as she surveyed the board again. 'I'll bet Touya was confused too. He must've had her come here so I could figure her out.'
I don't think that's it, Setsuko disagreed before Hikaru could start gloating. He looked at her for just a moment before returning his attention to the girl. Just watch her: you say she hates the game, yes? But she's still doing all she can to at least play impressively. You have already complimented her a few times now.
'I guess so. She's a strong player, but…' the biggest mystery of the girl was this uneasiness he felt; the hesitation when he considered her playing. He couldn't feel her potential or even her current skill level. 'Her Go is strong, but…'
It's "pride," Setsuko adopted an uncharacteristic pedantic tone as Hikaru blinked at her. The reason she plays so powerfully though she claims to feel nothing for the game. She has pride in her play; or rather, she has pride in all that she does well. She enjoys being a good player, which neither you nor Touya can experience because you can only defeat her. I'm sure she would take pleasure in a game that she was winning.
'But then why…?' Green eyes blinked. That still wouldn't explain the uneasiness that the girl's Go caused him. 'Even with her pride, her Go is so rough and incomplete. It's almost—'
Empty? Setsuko frowned as she stood with the full grace of a lady of the Heian court. That's why Touya had her meet with you, isn't it?
'Is that it, then? But why…?'
He must see something in you that he wants Yuka-chan to possess. Something more… her face twisted into a mocking smile, …passionate?
Hikaru cleared his throat loudly to try to drown out the spirit's giggles. "Yuka-chan." The girl lowered the hand that had covered her mouth. "Touya only told me a little bit about you. You're only playing Go to become a pro, right?"
"That's right," Yuka answered, chin lifting slightly. Defensively.
"And you say you're going to pass the exam this year?" He allowed a touch of mockery to enter his voice. Yuka's jaw clenched as he leaned over the goban. "Prove it," he hissed with a grin. Yuka colored at the challenge, slapping a stone down to connect her groups in the bottom left. Setsuko hid a smile behind her bachi as she moved to stand behind Hikaru.
"Are you going to win this game?" Hikaru asked as he captured a stone near the periphery of the new structure. Yuka made a frustrated noise in her throat.
"No," she admitted tersely. "You've been a pro for years."
"Well, you've been playing for much longer than I have." The room grew terribly still as both Kurata and Yuka blinked at the young pro in complete astonishment. "How else could you play so well without any attachment for the game?" Setsuko smiled at her host's rare moment of insight.
"I grew up playing," the girl admitted in a grumble, retreating from white's attack.
'Like Touya,' Hikaru told Setsuko. The ghost nodded, tracing her fingertips over the ivory of her plectrum. 'He probably knew that just from looking at her, though.' His thumb skimmed over the indent in his middle fingernail.
"Why only come into the insei program now? Surely you could've started training earlier; you could have been plenty prepared for the pro exam by now."
"No special reason." Yuka was glaring right at the spot that Hikaru was about to play in, probably without even realizing she was doing it. He smirked and played his stone at the opposite side of the board, almost laughing at the shock on her face.
'She has an amazing feel for the game. She probably felt out my next ten moves; maybe even more,' he thought for Setsuko's benefit. The spirit nodded, but she was only watching the girl. She didn't even glance at the battle between them.
There is something…Hikaru? What if this game…what if she isn't empty?
Hikaru shot an inquisitive glance her way but Setsuko was still staring straight at Yuka. 'I don't—' He looked back at the girl, trying to think. Setsuko's confidence filled his mind and he knew she was right, but what could that mean?
'Okay. Let's say that she does have some passion for the game. Why would she go to such lengths to hide it? It's only holding her back to not use her full potential. What is she hiding? It couldn't be—' Hikaru looked her over one more time. 'There's no way…It wouldn't be something like that…right, Setsuko?'
No, it isn't another spirit. Not so far as I can tell at any rate. Hikaru couldn't contain all of the disappointment he felt at that. He thought that he'd finally found someone he could talk to about his situation. Why not just ask her? I'm not sure it's such a big secret. If it's someone like you…
'What're you…' Setsuko looked pointedly at Kurata and Hikaru felt that he understood.
"Kurata-sensei?" The frog of a man blinked at him. "If there's something you'd rather attend to, I don't think I'll be done with your niece anytime soon. I can drive her back once we're through."
"No, I think I'd rather stay. I'd like to see just what Touya-kun was thinking, sending us all the way over here," the Gosei replied.
He's impossible! Setsuko exclaimed, near-outraged at his severe tactlessness.
'Now, now…'
"I'm terribly sorry, but I think you might be distracting Yuka-chan." The girl bristled so far that even Kurata noticed. Hikaru winked at him casually and Kurata caught on enough to play along.
"In that case, I'll leave it to her to direct you to her house. I'll see you later, Yuka-chan!" Kurata winked back clumsily as he walked out the door. Hikaru couldn't suppress a sigh at his antics. Yuka scowled at him.
"Now then…" He looked at Yuka expectantly. She still scowled, hand half-covering her lips. She had stopped counting. "What aren't you telling me?"
She blinked. "Plenty, Shindo Hikaru. But why don't you tell me: why would Touya Akira care at all about what you have to say? You don't even compare." Hikaru stiffened but said nothing. "Why would he tell you to evaluate my skill when you're nowhere near his level?" Her glare was supposed to be horrible. It was supposed to cut Hikaru's pride apart and mangle the pieces, but all he felt was a hint of pity. That was truly how she saw Akira's Go: as an insurmountable force.
'He wasn't even playing her seriously it's almost as if…' He let the thought die as he realized another key point of Yuka's character. 'She seriously looked at his Go after their first game. It was only shidougo then, but she actually dug out his kifu and looked at it. And she understood it, all on her own…'
"You've seen it, then?" Hikaru asked quietly. Yuka didn't let her glare diminish. "Touya Akira's skill?" Hikaru shook his head. "Then you should know that he doesn't have to waste himself on players as weak as you." Setsuko looked at him briefly. Yuka burned red.
"Just what gives you the right—"
Hikaru stood and drifted back to his room where kifu still littered the floor. He pulled out one hand-copied volume that he had transcribed himself and returned to the goban, dropping it at Yuka's side. She picked it up almost disdainfully, flipping through without interest.
"I don't know what you've seen of Touya's Go, but those are the games that Touya played against me."
"All these…" She opened a random page near the end, one that Hikaru had won. She studied it for a moment before looking back to the game she was currently playing. "You were just—"
"You learn well. Kurata-sensei said that you played a lot like Touya used to. He still would have floored you back then, but you do have some of his tendencies. I think that's just because you've drowned yourself in studying his kifu." Hikaru sighed, wondering just what he was supposed to tell Touya out of all that he learned. "Just one thing, though…One thing I can't quite figure out…" He stared at her, amused that she now shrank back slightly from his gaze. "Where is your Go? Don't you like to play?"
Yuka bit her lip, dropping their eye contact to look back at the kifu. Hikaru knelt again, glancing at the unfinished game on the goban.
"I'm nowhere near proud of this, but…" she measured Hikaru up quickly before taking a large breath, "…all I want is to keep playing." She stared at the kifu in her lap. "I know I don't play very well, but by copying Touya Akira, I can at least look strong. And my uncle…he recognizes enough to compare us, but…" she closed the book and set it down beside her, "…I can't get any stronger by myself. But my uncle…" a reluctant smile, "…he always did his best to make sure I never stopped playing. I pretend that he's a nuisance, that he forcesit on me, but no one else even would even listen when I tried to tell them I liked it, so I'm—" Yuka cleared her throat and put on a determined glare. "I'm leaving home and becoming a professional Go player. But if my parents knew how serious I was about this…there's no way they would allow they're precious daughter to end up corrupted by my father's whimsical brother. He's such a joke to them…"
Hikaru was touched to see Yuka so upset over someone like Kurata. It was more than enough for him. He wondered just how much would convince Touya.
You can't tell him very much of this, Hikaru. The girl has earned some discretion on your part. More than some. Hikaru?
"If all I have to do is convince you that I'm serious about this, then please…"
"Don't worry, Yuka." Hikaru smiled at the girl. "I won't tell him anything you don't want me to. But you have to promise me one thing." She tilted her head, eyes wide. "When you play with me, we play honestly. No shidougo, no imitations. Okay?"
"You mean, you'll tutor me too?"
"Of course not," he said with a grin. Yuka blinked. "We'll play just for fun. Whenever you want. Well, anytime that you want that I'm free…Well, not any time. There should be some limit…" Yuka was surprised into laughing, and Hikaru's grin softened into a friendly smile. "Trust me; with Touya teaching you, you're going to need all the fun you can get."
Touya was not amused. Hikaru had insisted on a match before they could discuss anything and proceeded to play a frustratingly straightforward game that Touya lost by no small margin, most likely due to the fact that he kept searching for elaborate hidden meanings in the flow of the stones.
"That's it?"
"Teach her, Touya. She's worth it, I promise."
"That's all you have to say to me?"
"For now, yeah. I dunno what you saw in her, but I promise it's real. She can be really strong, Touya."
Shindo had that stupid expression on his face. It was the expression that let Akira know exactly when his friend was about to get away with being completely unreasonable. He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.
"I'm holding you personally responsible for each headache this causes me, Shindo. I hope you know what you're talking about."
"What exactly did you see in her, Touya?" Shindo asked, eyes bright and hopeful. Akira smiled at the sight; it shouldn't have been so unfamiliar, but Hikaru's strange depression finally seemed to have lifted. "Touya? What was it that made you send her to me?"
"Just some small things that didn't add up, really," Akira ventured, crossing his arms. "The way she touched the stones. A look she got in her eyes sometimes. And that bizarre counting of hers." He shrugged. "I figured she was lying about at least some of her story. And people seem to trust you."
'Unreasonably, at that. You have more secrets and lies surrounding you than anyone I've ever encountered.' The thought was heavy between them. Touya felt his expression reflect it and sniffed, shaking his head lightly.
"No matter. If you say that I was right, at least that's somewhere to start."
"When's your first session?" Hikaru asked. Touya cleared the board and began to replay the game.
"Next Wednesday. It'll be late, of course. It's going to be rough working time into my schedule for a while. I don't suppose I could get you to give some supplementary lessons to keep her playing?"
"I'm sorry, but I can't give her lessons," Shindo apologized. Akira shot him a venomous look and the other boy held up his hands. "I already told her that any games I played with her would just be for fun. Besides, even you say that I suck at instruction." Touya's expression didn't soften. "Ogata, maybe. Or you could have Kurata…no, Kurata's no good…Who else…?"
"Ogata's no good either," Touya said with a sigh, glare finally cooling as he set the last stone of the game. "His schedule's worse than mine. And I shudder to think about leaving her alone with him." Shindo's eyes were a question that Touya ignored. "Forget it. Playing 'for fun' may be enough for her initially. So long as she has stones in her hands as often as possible…"
"…What about Akari?" Hikaru asked slowly. Touya blinked.
"Fujiwara-san?"
"She plays at a B-class insei level. It'll be good for Yuka to get experience from all kinds of people. She isn't a beginner, but she hasn't been exposed to competitive play before."
"Why not just let her play around in some Go salon, then?" Touya was getting irritated. The whole affair was becoming a major nuisance. He barely had enough time to visit his parents, play his matches, see Shindo and Ashiwara and the few other friends he had, and sleep, not to mention the various promotional jobs he got from the Go Association, sessions with the Ogata's study group, and preparing for two upcoming tournaments. Why should one girl have a license to alter his entire life just so Kurata could feel good about himself?
"Hey now, Touya," Hikaru said after a brief pause. "That's not a bad idea."
"Her name is Ito Yuka," Touya said to his father, pouring him a cup of tea. The old man was reclining at his wife's insistence, watching a game of NetGo between two Korean pros. "She's a few years younger than I am. I'm not too sure of her skill level, but she has definite potential. And Shindo Hikaru vouched for her, too."
"Ah, Shindo-kun. How is he doing these days?"
"He is well." Akira handed the cup to his father and joined him in watching the match. "Busy, I suppose, but better than you last saw him."
"Good. That boy…he's important, Akira. Don't let him fall too far behind."
Touya wanted to bristle at the implication that the he and Shindo were at the same pace, but he restrained himself to a simple, "He's doing better. His play is evolving, like you said. It's slow, but…" He searched for the right words. "I can see it; the player he could become." The look he gave his father was a question. "He's going to be very strong."
"He already is very strong. But then, so are you, Akira," Touya Kouyo responded, eyes still glued to the computer screen. "Shindo-kun is currently experimenting with many aspects of his game. He's learning to recognize very specific weaknesses in his play, and he is building new ways to overcome them; strategies that haven't been seen before."
"He seems to incorporate many archaic variations in his play," Akira noted for perhaps the dozenth time, but for the first time out loud. It didn't seem strange to discuss this with his father, though he did notice the faintest hint of a smirk on his father's face.
"In another hundred years, players will look to his games as a tome of insight into the complexities of the game. Akira, it is up to you to make sure he finds his way." The younger Touya looked helpless for the smallest instant. "No one will ever understand that boy more than you do. And no one will ever be able to let him discover his own methods as effectively as you; you are both so accustomed to playing each other…Haven't you noticed in your games against other players? At certain points, don't you find yourself evaluating a match as if you are sitting across from Shindo-kun?"
Touya allowed himself to smile, looking back at the computer screen.
"Do you have someone like that, father? Someone that helped you to discover your own Go?"
The former Meijin's smile lessened, corners hardening as he fought visibly to remain cheerful.
"I did, yes. Briefly, but yes…"
Akira blinked. 'Is he talking about…but who else could it be?' He couldn't bring himself to ask any more; he knew he wouldn't get any answers and it would only upset his father, but Touya tucked the information away. It was important. It was the biggest clue he was likely to receive from his father about Sai.
"It is a blessing, Akira, to have someone like that in your life."
"What about my Go, father? Will I find someone like that, too?"
Touya Kouyo regained his smile. "You haven't found him yet because he isn't ready." Akira's confusion was enough for his father to elaborate, "When Shindo Hikaru shows you the extent of his abilities, you will be able to find your own. And then…" His smile was so serene. "…The future of all of Go will be in your hands; I just hope I will be there to see it."
Setsuko moved Hikaru's hands over the biwa methodically. The strings had been removed and a cloth prepared to polish the wooden body of the instrument, but then Setsuko insisted on being allowed to do it herself.
"You barely let me play at all," she complained using his voice. Hikaru decided he would never get used to hearing himself when he wasn't talking, especially when she would say the same things that Sai always did…
'Don't complain; I don't have too much time these days. Things may change later on, but for now…just be grateful I'm letting you play at all.' He felt like a bully. Her sullen pouting wasn't helping him feel any better.
"Well, I'm at least going to sing for you today," she told him. "I'm tired of humming."
'By all means,' Hikaru sighed. What choice did he have?
"Hikaru?" Setsuko asked, polishing cloth pausing in its gentle caresses. "Do you think you could…no, never mind."
'What is it?' This was one of the most infuriating things she did: thinking half of a thought out loud and refusing to share its entirety without a lot of effort and prodding on Hikaru's part.
"No, you just said you don't have any time." She at least seemed to be genuinely trying not to inconvenience him, but he could never tell when she was being genuine or when she was just trying to manipulate him.
'Just tell me what you want. I'll decide if there's time for it.'
"I've been thinking a lot lately…" She made his fingers clench around the cloth; he felt how uncomfortable she was. "Is it possible to take a trip soon?"
'…Where to?'
"I…" she drooped, catching Hikaru's lip in between his teeth. "I'd like to see my old palace."
'In Ise? Setsuko…you've seen what I have. I did research for you; it isn't a palace anymore. Just ruins and museums.'
"I know that!" his voice shouted at him. "I know it's probably pointless, but I keep on…" Tears stung at Hikaru's eyes and throat. "I keep seeing the same dreams, Hikaru. I need to see it myself…" She wiped his eyes with the back of his hand before resuming the task of polishing the biwa. "I need to, Hikaru."
Hikaru considered it for a moment. 'I suppose it's close enough to Innoshima…I'm planning that trip with Touya soon. We'll be passing by that way…Sure, Setsuko. We can go to Saiku.' A flood of delight surged into his consciousness. 'But!' She calmed herself down by a few notches. 'I just want to warn you now: everything is so much different now. I don't want you to get your hopes up too much.'
"Oh, thank you, Hikaru! Thank you, thank you, thank you!" His voice had never been so high-pitched.
'Don't worry about it. And Setsuko?'
"Nnn?"
'Don't ever be worried about asking for things. I'll let you know when you're being ridiculous. I promise.' Her grin was his and it was fantastic. 'Now…play me a song.'
"Patience, patience." Her giddiness hadn't faded. It actually grew as she finished cleaning her biwa and restrung it. "My lovely here won't meet any demands but my own." She was beaming as she plucked at the strings, tuning the instrument to match the range of Hikaru's voice. "This is a story song about a general and his horse."
As she sang and played, Hikaru could see the story. He forgot that he was listening to his own voice as it was transfigured through Setsuko's mastery of vocalization. He forgot that his fingers were developing new calluses that blistered uncomfortably and would horribly inconvenience him throughout the next few days. He forgot everything except the taste of the music in his mind and for a moment, he felt nothing at all except Setsuko moving his fingers and lips to the simple rhythms of the song. Horses galloped across his mind and he drifted until Setsuko pulled back.
I can't do much else today… she murmured, fatigue tickling her place in his mind. Please set it to rest for me…Hikaru?
"Okay, Setsuko-hime." She smiled at the formality, slipping further into her own exhaustion.
And…thank you. For everything…
Phew, that was a long wait for some of you. More is coming, but not soon. I'm done with making irresponsible, optimistic promises. We're really getting somewhere though. And that is a promise.
