Everything right now is centred here, everything is an extension of this. For him. For us.

His cock, his poor, beautiful cock, quivering in time to his heartbeat, so thrilled and appreciative at last to be noticed, to not be given up for dead.

Me? I'm just the messenger.

God it's just ... what can I say ? How can I possibly fucking explain it ? Unbelievable. Truly, almost more than I can stand. Like being propelled, hurtled forward at a swirling, dizzying pace by magical unseen forces. Everything, everything, is this - this brilliant, ceaseless, swirling/swiveling/bobbing/slipperiness. Making love to an organ, I recall him saying. Yes, I now fully understand.

And I'm a little afraid of the knowledge that ... I'm not even frigging there yet. What on earth will it feel like- coming ? ? Will my head pop off and hit the ceiling ? No wonder people are obsessed. No wonder I was.

Really, for a boy who hasn't come in a year ? I mean ... I would've thought it'd at least be quick.

But christ, to have been been granted such an extraordinary opportunity ... the final page in what for him must seem a decades-long chapter in the piecing together of his life ... I couldn't be more honoured, whatever else happens, if I can just bring him round ... please ... I promise you, nothing else will touch it.

I'm aware of my hand searching blindly for the door handle, to steady myself, as my breathing suddenly slows and my lids go all fluttery.

Holy fuck, this must be it.

Damn ... this is scary.

Thank christ it's Maxxie, and not some random girl. Thank christ for that.

At once, his body goes quiet. Oh fuck, we're almost there – I'm so happy I could expire, so proud and pleased and thrilled to bits to even be here, to have played any part at all, and to now be a witness to this singularly momentous event in his life.

Okay, enough with the romantic bollocks. Bear down ... bloody concentrate ... steady, warp speed ... squeeze, stroke, swivel, suck ... balanced counter-rhythm, clutch his hip to steady him, and yourself.

And here we go ...

My breathing stops. Am I dying ? My body feels like one long strand of taut wire, through which is about to be fed a dangerously out of control electrical current.

Up and down and back again; call to the warm bed of semen within. Kiss and stroke and squeeze and swivel and bloody well suck. Do not stop ! No matter that your jaw is ready to dissolve from the pressure.

It starts in my toes – a miniature jangly warm tingle, and spreads quickly upward, knees, thighs, hips ... I'm aware of a tremor forming and I'm struck with a desperate thirst, a blinding need that is at once, unimaginably sweet and dirty and awful and filthy and delicious. Like my entire being- brain, nervous system, arteries, lungs, heart, has been taken over and swallowed whole.

Holy bleeding christ.

In the next split second, I become keenly aware of the ridge of my left shoulder blade digging into the door, the tiny, microscopic fibers and orbits of lights inside my eyelids, each individual droplet of sweat snaking it's way down my back. My tongue feels like wood. My eyebrows are standing on end. I can't quite remember what tripping feels like, but this, may I say, is many miles better.

Okay ... now ... god ... up, up … to the ceiling, to the sky, inside out and knotted to bits and floating free and … moving … moving …

... ohgod ... oh no ... the wonder and torture of that glorious, stupendous mouth ...

Get your head out of the fucking clouds, boy, cuz here It comes ...

I'm floating, corpuscles contracting at light speed, hot and breathless and dying. Somewhere far off I hear a pained sound squeezing through the hollow of my throat, glancing off the walls … the tingle rises upward, shooting through my thighs and belly and spleen, straight up into my skull which rockets backward … in an instant, my fog-shrouded head quits spinning, like a hand to a rotating globe ...

WOOSHH !

Bloody ...

fucking ...

tsunami.

His hips jerk, his whole body jerks and shakes like he's having a stroke; it's so intense, it's downright unnerving and for a second I'm afraid – is he okay ? Is it too much for him ? His brain ? I look up, and watch the great blissed-out storm pass, a sight of unimagineable beauty and magic in itself ... and then he calls out – a sound I shall never forget: piercing, wrenching, like a gorgeous, innocent boy experiencing something beyond his comprehension. The sound fills the room as he jolts over and over ... and I know that I've never experienced anything like this before, this manic a level of devotion and passion for another human being.

My god.

It's happened.

We did it. We really did.

After a minute, he pops up off his knees, and stands there, and just holds me ... and it's ... god, so powerful. Just ... unbelievable. There kind of aren't words for it.

I'm sweating and gasping like an arse, in total disbelief over ... everything ... that Maxxie and I really are here, inexplicably in a room someplace, somewhere on earth, and that he's just granted me this incredible gift - that's how it feels, this bit of wisdom that is utterly rare and priceless ... the keys to the rest of my life ... so fractured to this point, now, at last, I know it, I can feel it - made whole.

I'm convinced it's all some fucked up dream, some far off ridiculously over the top fantasy in which I'm happier than I ever could've imagined, and so sated and serene and madly in love I might go crazy ...

So ... yes, let it officially be known ... that the cliches about fireworks and pleasingly achy post-orgasm balls and huge, weary, satisfied smiles plastered to your sweaty, stupidarse face ...

... all are true.