Oh God, I'm finally updating!

I do not own Axis Powers Hetalia.

…

Time passed and school life went by a little smoother than the past two years, perhaps because Ivan was a bit calmer… he still tended to scare and pick on others a bit but not as much as he used to. He merely avoided them most of the time. His family noticed the slight change and didn't try to force him back to Russia, and as the weather got colder everyone got busier and didn't bother with him anymore. Katyusha and Eduard both had to travel around Canada a lot, mostly to Ottawa, and Toris and Natalia were busy with their own lives. Home became empty.

Frost showed up on the grass and all the leaves were rotting on the ground. A bit of snow would sometimes fall, but it wasn't quite cold enough for it to stay in packs on the ground so it merely melted away and made the ground a slushy and soggy mess. Ivan didn't think much of it other than the fact he wasn't a huge fan of the cold, but that was one of the wonderful uses of his regular heavy clothing attire. It was, however, appearing to have an effect on Madeline. She always seemed so much more exhausted, more feverish at times. She didn't leave the hospital anymore, and didn't even do much inside her room except sit by the window or play the occasional board game with him. Her appearance was even becoming thinner and paler to a point where he became reasonably worried, but decided not to speak up yet in case it wasn't important. Still, Ivan wondered about the girl.

One day after school, he walked in to her sleeping form. It wasn't normal for Madeline to be sleeping this late in the afternoon as far as he knew… he had never seen her sleep much during the day. Ivan frowned and pulled a chair up to sit beside her. Her cheeks were sweaty and a bit red… it was probably another fever. Maybe if he sat here for a while she would at least wake up and keep him company, although she did seem rather ill today with her heavy breathing and slightly pained expression. Maybe she needed the sleep…

Soon enough, the familiar Nurse Eliza walked in. One look at Ivan made her pout and glare slightly as she checked the girl on the bed over. "You'd better be behaving."

"Da."

"Don't disrupt the other patients…"

"Da."

The nurse ignored him after that, still examining Madeline and looking a bit sad as she did. Her expression showed pity, and it caused worry to bite at Ivan's chest.

"Is she… alright?" he asked quietly. Elizabeta did not look up, but she nodded.

"She always gets worse this time of the year, as far as I've seen. They almost lost her when she was just a little girl, sometimes. This winter shouldn't be that bad, though… she's getting stronger." She explained. Ivan's heart pounded slightly faster.

"What causes it? Why is it this time of year she gets worse?" he asked, not even noticing the slight waver and shake of his voice. At this, the nurse raised her head, face showing an unsure expression.

"It could be anything… of course winter is a bad time for anyone with weak health and a bad heart but…" she paused, looking down at the sleeping Madeline. "There isn't a lot we know about her…"

"I see…" Ivan sighed. Just as he thought, it remained a mystery.

"On the bright side, my husband will come and play music for the patients!" Eliza giggled cheerfully. So this young lady had a husband too… people sure got married early around here. Then again, early marriages were common in his family, as well.

"Well, she looks fine for today. Let's hope she keeps it up." Elizabeta smiled and left the room, seemingly relaxed and giddier now. Ivan didn't feel the same, though. He didn't like the fact that winter hurt Madeline so badly. If she got worse than she usually was, it would defiantly be painful to watch. It was odd, for usually the pain of others either didn't bother Ivan or even made him laugh… but this girl was so different. He wanted to… protect her, almost… not that he found her completely vulnerable and weak, for she seemed strong on the inside, but in a way he wanted no harm to come to her. He hadn't felt this way before for anyone except his sisters.

A rubbing and shifting of sheets made the large Russian-Canadian come back to reality. His eyes focused on the bed and light violet eyes met the slowly opening deep, purplish blue ones. A light groan sounded in Madeline's throat.

"Who's there?" she mumbled. Ivan realised she wasn't wearing her glasses, and probably could barely see.

"Ivan, da?" he mumbled. She reached over to the table beside her where she always kept her water and pills, then felt around and finally found her glasses there. Lazily she dragged them onto her face and squeezed her eyes at the sudden brightness and clear vision. Madeline did not sit up, but she looked over to Ivan with a tired smile.

"Hi… sorry I'm not really… awake today, eh?" she mumbled with a light smile.

"I don't care much but…" he trailed off. Madeline's smiled faded as she seemed more curious now.

"What is it?" she asked. He stared at the ground, playing with his heavy boots.

"Is it true that your health gets a lot worse in the winter? You won't… get too bad, will you? A nurse told me you almost died as a child because of It." he said quietly. She was silent, face becoming rather melancholic.

"I do become worse… but don't be too worried, alright?" she asked. He looked up to her and nodded lightly. She knew he wasn't really content with that answer, but it was really all she could give him for now. Who knew what winter would bring? She could only hope she would be stronger like the doctors were saying she might be.

"You don't need to come over during the winter, eh… if it bothers you or if you're too bored staying here." She quietly assured him. He shook his head immediately, a bit of anger piping up.

"Don't be an idiot; I'm not picky like that. I don't care if you sleep every moment that I am here." He stated. Madeline smiled.

"You're a bit too nice for your own good…"

"I am not kind, I am merely doing what I want to. I refuse to be stupid and think so much of other's opinions!" He pouted like a child. She giggled lightly.

"Whatever you say…"

"Whatever I say is true. I do not want to be by myself during the winter, it is the loneliest time of the year…" the Russian suddenly became rather small-looking and scared. Madeline was so tired and ill she wasn't able to notice and smiled to herself.

"What's wrong with winter? It may hurt me but I still love it… it's so pretty and all my favourite sports are played on the ice. I would have thought you would like it too…"

"… I would but… there's one memory that always makes winter slightly painful…"

"A memory?" she questioned. He nodded, eyes going distant.

"The only thing I can recall is lots of snow… lots of cold… and lots of blood and pain…" he whispered lowly. Chills went down Madeline's spine as she heard the tone of his voice… so much heaviness. She didn't know if he would continue or not, but she wasn't even sure if she wanted to know. Was it something she was allowed to know?

"Ah… that was a bit off of me." Ivan suddenly spoke up.

"I-It's okay… but… I'm really sorry something so terrible happened to you…" she whispered. He shook his head quickly. She pitied him, but that shouldn't be the case here. He didn't want any pity.

"It was a car accident that took my parents from me… the cause was a blizzard… but I was so young that I can hardly recall anything but lying in the snow and waiting all alone in the cold for someone to find me… it's not the memory that's painful, it's the effect it left on my body and mind… I became injured in several places and have many… terrible scars all over my body. It's quite disgusting." He mumbled, hand cautiously touching his white scarf and tightening it. He had just told Madeline even more about himself, he realised, something he didn't want to do in the beginning but always accidentally did, anyways.

"I don't think you're disgusting, Ivan. I wouldn't care if you didn't even have a face. I mean, I'm always told how skinny and pale and frigid I am by the nurses… but you don't say anything about that, do you?" she laughed lightly. It didn't exactly make him feel better, though he knew that neither he nor Madeline cared for each other's appearances… but he knew she defiantly wasn't as ugly as he was. She had spent her life in the hospital and she was still pretty, even if she was thin and pale.

"On my first day of school Alfred took off my scarf in front of a bunch of people and they saw my scars… they didn't understand that I wore my coat and scarf for a reason. Now there are rumours of how I got them… they think I'm some sort of gang fighter…" he hissed.

"A gang fighter, eh? I can see you getting in a pretty nasty hockey fight but from what little I've heard about gangs from Doctor Gil… I don't know if you would be that silly." She smiled a bit. His expression lightened.

"You would be surprised, da?" he joked. She giggled lightly, the exhaustion still evident in her voice. Ivan frowned then, remembering her worsening condition.

"Do you want to see?" he asked quietly. She frowned.

"See what?"

"…the scars."

"If you want to show me… but whatever they look like I don't care much." She assured him. And yet, he still wanted her to show her. His scars were something that only his sisters had ever been allowed to see, and he really just wanted her approval on them, he supposed. Slowly, the Russian boy slipped off his scarf and coat, letting them fall gently to the ground. Next came his shirt, showing off his large and muscular form.

Madeline stared blankly. Several pink and purple lines ran around Ivan's neck and almost completely covered the flesh, and many more ran in X's and slashes on his chest and back with just a couple more minor ones running down his arms. Gently, she brought her hand to run along one on his arm, and he held his breath as she did the action. Her hands were so gentle and soft…

"This is quite the sight…" she said seriously. His heart beat a bit faster.

"What… is it that bad…" he whispered nervously. She looked up to him slowly, eyes solemn… and then…

She giggled.

"Nothing to worry about, Ivan. They don't disturb me in the least. In fact… I have scars on my chest, too. I've had three heart surgeries in total and the scars are really deep and big… but I don't think I should show you mine. I'd have to take off my shirt and… I'm not supposed to do that in front of boys, eh." She explained. Ivan stared at her, surprised, and then smiled lightly.

"Nyet, I'd rather you not do that." He nodded. "I would get into lots of trouble."

He quickly put his clothes back on. Ivan still hated his scars, he hated looking at them, he hated having them, and he hated remembering what little of the night he got them he could recall. But Madeline didn't care one bit about the purple and pink marks that would always be there. She still proved to be different than anyone else who had seen and heard of them, who used them to become even more afraid without even trying to talk to him.

And yet… Madeline still hadn't told much about herself. That was something that still bothered him… angered him, in fact. He would give her more time, though. Maybe time was all it took.

…

In the end, Madeline fell fast asleep before they could talk any further. Ivan snuck out the room and headed home. On the way there, he noticed light snow falling as the temperature rose. It made him wonder if this was going to affect Madeline…

No one was home, so he merely passed the time with television and reading for the rest of the night before Toris and Natalia came home and he retired to his room.

Before he went to bed, Ivan noticed the snow become even heavier…

…

It wasn't a surprise when next morning everything was frozen and the snow had packed heavily on the ground. Ivan put on a heavy sweater beneath his coat and added some leather gloves to his wardrobe before he parted for school. Kids were fooling around, younger ones taking advantage of the fresh sticky snow that was perfect for snow men, older ones complaining about the cold and struggle to walk but still shoving each other into large piles. It was nice he wasn't sweating so much now that his clothes were appropriate for the season, for Ivan was so used to cold that he almost needed it sometimes as much as he hated it.

The school day always went by faster when no one wanted to be outside. He got a bit of homework and departed, heading for the hospital. This time, Madeline was burning up and surely needed sleep, so he watched her for a while before leaving.

That was how the first day of the true winter went, and it was the same each day for about a week. Dress warmly, walk to school, go to the hospital, watch Madeline sleep, go home. Nothing but blank, boring days. Sometimes she woke up, but she was either with fever or exhausted. In this case, they talked a bit or sat in silence. She assured him this was normal, and he believed her, but he still wasn't enjoying how ill she was. But if she said she was alright, he wouldn't question it.

His opinion on that changed when she had an air mask on one day. It made him freeze at the doorway as he stared at the stupid thing that covered her pale face, glasses off, hair in a mess. Before she had at least made an attempt to get ready a bit before he came… but not today. Ivan didn't like that pained expression on her face… or the way she shuddered a bit with each breath. He didn't know if he should go beside her or leave…. he had no clue what to do at this point.

"She's alright, Ivan. Her breathing was just a bit heavy so we put that on. It will pass, it's happened before." A voice assured behind him. He didn't need to look at the woman; the French accent told him who it was.

"You're sure?" he asked quietly.

"Oui, she's doing well this year." The woman answered. "Perhaps next year it will be even better, as long as the pattern continues."

"Okay." He breathed out heavily. This still disturbed him, but at least it was… normal?

Normal was such an odd word to use for this.

…

A few more days of quick visits and seeing Madeline sleeping went by. Ivan hated it. But the weather was calming down and warming up… at least, for winter. He walked up the stairs to her floor with slow, nervous steps, hoping that maybe she would be awake. He wanted her to… look at him, at least! He wanted to just see those kind eyes no matter how tired they were… see her smile at him no matter how weak or even forced it was. The cold and silence was getting to him.

He stood at the door. If she was asleep, then perhaps he could just wait and wait until she woke up… or at least until visiting hours ended. He just wanted to see her eyes open, to ease his nerves and stress. Ivan inhaled deeply and took one step through the door and shot his head over to the met. Light violet met dark violet, and his breath was released. She was looking better… a little bit of colour in her cheeks and hair even combed once again, glasses slipped on her face and eyes looking less tired.

"You are an idiot." He mumbled. She frowned.

"What did I do?"

"Worry me! Like you always do!" he scolded, but his voice was not harsh. He was just relieved.

"I'm sorry…" she apologised sincerely.

"Don't apologise…" he answered, crossing his arms.

"But I worried you, so I should…"

"Nyet, you apologise too much. It was something you couldn't help so don't say anything." He commanded.

"But you… scolded me…"

"And then you should fight back!"

"Oh… sorry."

…

Madeline's improved health was short-lived as she grew tired and feverish again not long after. Ivan sat beside her quietly as she struggled to stay awake.

"Sleep, da?" he insisted, removing her glasses and placing them on the table. Madeline's glassy eyes stared at him sadly.

"I can't…" she whispered.

"Why not?" he sighed. She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it and shut her eyes. Ivan was alerted when she suddenly flinched and placed a hand to her chest.

"Does it hurt?" he asked seriously. She nodded. "Should I get someone? A nurse?"

"No…"

"But Madeline…"

"It's alright, she's okay." A voice sounded behind him. He hadn't even noticed Dr. Bonnefoy-Kirkland walk in. The blond woman didn't look so cheerful and "fabulous" as she usually did.

"Well what's wrong with her?" Ivan demanded.

"Chest pains… I've checked her over not long ago, it's not serious. It's common since she's become so weak." The woman explained, still looking over Madeline and checking things over. The girl clutched her chest and moaned lightly. The doctor frowned at her before leaving quickly, probably having something else to take care of.

Ivan knew it wasn't serious, but he still wanted to help… but what could he possibly use to protect Madeline from this illness? The winter and cold was doing it to her, right? So…

He hesitated as his hand went up to his scarf. His precious scarf. It protected him from the cold, so would it protect Madeline? He slowly took it off and wrapped it around the neck of the pained girl. She opened her eyes in question.

"It will keep you warm, da?" he whispered.

"But…" she

"Don't argue."

"Then… take Kuma…."

"Your bear?"

"Please…" she was trying to give something back, desperate to be equal with him. Ivan sighed, knowing by now that this was just how the girl was. He looked beside the Canadian and saw the bear sitting loyally at her side. Carefully, the Russian scooped the toy in his arms and held it close to him, showing Madeline that he had taken the bear.

"If you take care of my scarf, I'll take good care of him, da?" he told her. By now, she was growing weak and struggling to keep her eyes open.

"Kay." She whispered. Afterwards, she quickly closed her eyes and drifted to sleep. Ivan stared at her for a while longer before leaving.

She'd better damn well take care of his scarf… honestly; he was almost being too nice!

…

The walk home was humiliating. His scars were exposed and his neck was cold, bare for everyone to see. Not to mention, Ivan had a large stuffed polar bear in his arms. Some stared, some avoided him. After what seemed like an eternity, Ivan made it home.

He didn't expect Katyusha to be there, but she met him at the door. The moment she saw her little brother she froze.

"Vanya… erm… where did you get that bear?" she asked.

"A friend. I'm borrowing it." He answered. She nodded, but was still unsatisfied with such a simple answer.

"I also see… you don't have your scarf…" she mumbled, rocking back and forth. Her eyes were sad… perhaps it hurt to think he had gotten rid of something she made especially for him…

"Vanya dear, I made you this scarf so you don't have to be embarrassed of your scars anymore! It will keep you warm when you go outside, too!"

"Can I really keep it? It's so warm! Thank you Katyusha!"

"I lent it to the same friend." He answered. She nodded in understanding.

"So, you have a friend…" she smiled. He blushed.

"Da, I have a friend." He mumbled, quickly walking upstairs to his room.

He hadn't made his big sister cry this time… but she was still too far away to make him happy.

…

No one walked into Ivan's room that night, but suppose someone had they would have found him uncharacteristically snuggling a teddy bear to his empty neck, taking in the scent of both hospital medication and a certain Canadian girl.

…

Why am I so mean to Madeline? I felt bad this writing this chapter -_- And now we know pretty much everything we need to about Ivan, at first I kind of felt nervous about making him talk about himself so easily but… I don't find that there's a need for him to hide it, I guess? I mean, I've always found Ivan as someone who will share his pain as long as someone is actually willing to listen, but maybe it's just me? Madeline, on the other hand… she takes a while XD

Updates are growing slower, but I've been busy, sorry! It's going to get worse when I start school on Tuesday, just a head's up.

Hope you enjoyed~