A/N: Here's another one...not sure where we're going but hopefully we'll find out soon!
A week later.
Callie and Arizona had been even more inseparable since there lunch together than they had been before. The realisation that both of them had been prepared to give up their dream and change the person they were for the woman that they loved was a reality check for the both of them and the reassurance that they both needed.
Arizona was getting fitter every day, she wanted to be at home more than ever and living with Callie was a definite prize at the end of the hard road. An even further goal was provided in the image now firmly in both of their heads of the couple with children.
The memorial service had been planned around the recovery of Arizona, Derek and Alex whilst it also waited for Bailey to be back; it just wouldn't have been the same otherwise. It was organised to be on the day exactly a month after the shooting had taken place and was to be held in the hospital grounds. A memorial garden was being placed at the front entrance, replacing the paved pedestrian area it had been previously. This meant that every day the staff would walk through it and it was meant to cause them to smile rather than to be sad.
Richard had kept it very under-wraps about what the design and layout was, wanting to give something to the hospital; he still blamed himself partially for not being there on the day from the very beginning. Callie had gone up to get Arizona as she was still wheelchair bound only to find her sat at the edge of bed in tears. Callie instantly ran forwards and wrapped her arms gently around Arizona, knowing that she was still very sore.
'Shush...What's wrong baby?' She soothed as she rocked her girlfriend back and forth.
'I-i-i-i should've died Calliope...' Arizona coughed out in between full-body sobs that tore Callie's heart to pieces.
'What?'
'Me...I got shot...not once but t-t-three times and other people just got s-s-shot once and they're now dead...w-w-why did I-i-i deserve to live?' Callie didn't have a clue what to say; Arizona had been so...upbeat since the shooting, this was the first time that she'd had a visible breakdown, that Callie knew of at least.
'Babe, it's not about who deserves to live and who doesn't. Every single person that lost their life that day didn't deserve it...Reed, Percy, Sandra... none of them deserved it Arizona...not you or Derek or Alex either...but it happened...Gary Clark came into our hospital and ripped out it's very heart, but you know what?' Callie reached forward so that Arizona was looking into her eyes. 'He hasn't broken Seattle Grace Mercy West...he's made us stronger...I know it's shit...but look at what this shooting has done for us...God I'm not saying I'm glad the shooting happened...no way...but we have to make the best out of the shittest situation Zona. You got lucky...we were able to get you to an OR and save your life but please don't dwell on why you're alive babe...it'll eat you up otherwise. All I can say is that I will be eternally grateful to whomever was watching over you that day...be it God...or someone else...your brother maybe...I don't know...I'm just going to forever be in their debt cause you're still here with me and I get to grow old with you...marry you...and have babies with you...'
'...and chickens.' Arizona whispered as she nuzzled into Callie's neck as the tears stopped falling. Her Calliope always knew how to make her feel better regardless of the situation.
'Of course babe, the chickens too.' Callie kissed the top of Arizona's head.
'So you want to get married then?' Arizona couldn't help but ask the question as the stupidest of grins spread across her face. The question caught Callie off guard; it had never been something they had spoken about but it just seemed right if they were going to have kids...plus Arizona in a wedding dress...phwoar!
'Well if you want to...' Callie didn't know what else to say.
Arizona chuckled at Callie's obvious nervousness, 'It's ok I won't hold you to it.' Arizona kissed Callie before sitting back up and continuing to pull on her scrubs. She didn't know why but she felt that she needed to be in them for the memorial service. Callie came out of her thoughts and helped Arizona gently get dressed, taking care to miss putting pressure on any of her wounds as she knew they were very tender.
Arizona was positioned in the chair, 'Ready?' Callie asked, pulling on her lab-coat.
'Ready,' replied Arizona as she pulled on her own white coat. They walked in silence to the elevator, rode down to the lobby and joined the rest of the staff who were beginning to assemble outside. Derek and Alex were already there; both of them being men had discarded their chairs and instead leant on the nearest thing for support; Derek on Meredith and Alex on a tree.
'Hey guys.' Teddy moved to stand the other side of Arizona to Callie.
'Hey Teds.' Both women greeted the cardio surgeon.
'I suppose it's stupid to ask how you both are?' Teddy's questioned was met with a nervous chuckle from Callie and Arizona, neither wanting to answer the question.
'Is Bailey here?' Arizona asked, from her chair she could only see peoples torsos.
'Yeah, she's there look...oh wait she's coming over.'
'Oh how it's good to see you up and about Arizona.' Bailey greeted all three women with a hug for each of them.
'How are you Bailey?' Callie asked.
'Tired. Hurting. Angry. Confused. The same as you three I should imagine.' Bailey's response did indeed sum up the three women's feelings, more so the entire staff.
All four stood there in silence waiting for the unveiling to begin. As the Chief stood up Arizona got angry with the fact that she couldn't see and instantly went to get up, regretting it as her thigh, shoulder and chest screamed at her. She tried to push through the pain but it was too much and she almost gave up.
Then she felt three sets of hands helping her silently. Teddy and Bailey supported her gently under her arms and Callie moved behind her. Callie kicked the chair out of the way and wrapped her hands around Arizona's mid-drift so that she could help take some of the weight off of her leg.
Callie's mouth moved to Arizona's ear, 'I've got you babe.'
That simple sentence was all it took for silent tears to fall down Arizona's face already. She nestled into Callie's embrace whilst also looping her arms around Bailey's and Teddy's so that it was more comfortable for all of them.
'Thank you.' Arizona breathed so that all of them could hear. Bailey and Teddy simply smiled at her whilst Callie kissed her neck softly. They all looked up as Chief Webber stood up in front of them.
'Today is not a day to be sad. I think we've all done our fair share of crying and grieving over the past month. Instead, today is a day to remember those that we lost; to celebrate their lives and reveal our own little way of remembering them for everyone that comes to this hospital in a week, a month, a year, a century; people will know what they gave to us. So today, remember those we lost, but remember the people they were, what they brought to the hospital and what they brought to our personal lives... Remember them with a smile on your face and love in your heart...' Richard stepped down and pulled off the sheet that was covering the memorial.
It was very simply; beautiful. It was a small waterfall design, on the rock that the water spilled out over were written the names of the people that lost their lives that day. It was so simple and fitted in perfectly with the rest of the front of the hospital and yet it was still clear what it was there for. Everyone remained silent as they took in the scene before them; some had brought flowers which they threw into the water.
'Chief can I say something?' Derek motioned forwards; he walked tall and strode forwards even though he was in obvious pain.
'Well you are the actual Chief.' Richard joked.
'Thank you.' Derek said as he stepped up to the front, swaying slightly. 'Firstly I'm going to say thank you. Thank you to all of you for coming back to work so quickly, so efficiently, you all truly are the foundations of this hospital and that fact will never change. Secondly I want to step down as Chief. This job isn't for me, I don't want to do it anymore...I want to be a surgeon...and let's be honest here Richard Webber has and always be our Chief here...so yeah...back to you Chief!' With that Derek stepped down, threw a flower in the water, took Meredith's hand and walked back inside.
A laugh broke the silence that the four women were cast under as Bailey chuckled to herself, 'He quit! Just like that...oh Derek Shepherd...' The other three women stood with her gave a small chuckle before descending into silence once more.
The crowd dispersed to leave pretty much those four, the three still supporting Arizona on her feet.
'I need to go to my ward.' Arizona spoke clearly and with a degree of authority.
'Of course babe, sit down I'll wheel you back and get you to bed.' Callie answered straight away as she pulled the chair back and gently sat Arizona down in it.
'No Calliope you misunderstand me...I want to go back to my ward...paeds...' Callie froze where she was; this would be the first time that they had both been back in the ward since the day of the shooting and it was going to be difficult for Callie as it would be for Arizona. Both Teddy and Bailey realised this and shared a knowing glance. Both had been back to the places they had seen the most horrific things: Bailey to the General ward and back to that room; Teddy herself to the paeds ward where she had seen her best friend, covered in blood and thought she was dead.
'Are you sure Zona?' Callie couldn't hide the concern in her voice.
'I'm sure. I need to face it and stop hiding behind my injuries.' Arizona didn't know where the conviction and confidence came from in her voice but she was glad it was there as she knew that Callie wouldn't let her go unless she was sure Arizona would be ok.
'Babe...'
'Calliope...please?' Arizona's dimpled smile and big blue eyes were too much for Callie to resist so she just nodded. As she moved to push Arizona Bailey pushed her away and gestured for her to walk alongside her girlfriend. Bailey and Teddy had already made up in their own minds separately that they would go with them; they knew how hard it would be and realised that Callie underestimated what it would do to her as well.
They walked back into the hospital in silence, Callie walked next to Arizona in her chair; she had her arm propped up so that she could hold Callie's, their fingers clasped tightly round each other. They rode the elevator once again in silence, when Bailey reached the double doors that led to the peads ward she stopped so that everyone could collect their thoughts.
'You both sure you're ready for this?' Teddy looked at both Arizona and Callie in turn. They both simply nodded and tightened their grip on each other's hand.
Teddy pushed through the double doors in front of them and as soon as Arizona's eyes fell on the floor in front of her she instantly felt the tears roll down her face and her breathing quicken. Bailey stopped pushing the chair forward and placed a reassuring hand on the blonde's quivering shoulder. Callie too had tears in her eyes as she saw Arizona's lifeless body in front of her again, covered in all that blood.
'I told him about you Calliope you know...' Arizona's voice was almost inaudible as she spoke.
'What?' Callie replied, bending down so she was now at Arizona's eye level.
'Gary Clark...I told him about you...I thought if I told him some things or...I dunno...he wouldn't shoot me.' This was the first time that Arizona had really revealed what had happened between her and Gary Clark, Callie ran gentle circles on Arizona's wrists as she continued. 'I think the fact that I was a lesbian didn't really help my chances...' she let out a sarcastic chuckle. 'He said he was looking for Richard Webber...said he'd already taken down Derek and wanted his final 'prize'...then he started crying...he said he was sorry...then he asked me if I had anyone in my life that I loved with all my heart...someone that I would do anything for...of course I told him about Calliope... he laughed...said that I couldn't know true love if it was with another woman...I shouted at him then...told him he was wrong, I did truly love another woman with all my heart, someone that I would do anything for...give my life for even...that made him laugh, he said that I should prove it and he raised the gun and shot...he shot my shoulder first and I just kind of stood there, it hurt but I was so determined to not let him see that I hurt...then he shot my thigh...I couldn't hold it in then and I screamed...fell to my knees and begged him not to shoot me again, I knew that I would survive if that was the only wounds he inflicted then he laughed and shot me in the chest...I don't remember him leaving, I think I blacked out cause the next thing I can remember is seeing you Calliope.'
Callie's face was now completely tear stained as well, her mouth agape at the whole story Arizona had just shared. Teddy and Bailey both had tears on their face as well. They all stood in silence after Arizona had finished her story, none of them really sure what to say next.
Their thoughts were all interrupted by the voice of a tiny human; 'Dr. Robbins!' They all turned to the direction of the voice to see a young girl running up to them all. As she neared and took in the faces of the four doctors she slowed her run and frowned. 'Why are you all sad?'
Arizona smiled at the girl in front of her; she was one of her long term patients, Jessica, she had leukaemia and things weren't looking good, not that you would tell from the way she was. She just sometimes had good days, they were becoming less frequent but when she did, she lit up the whole ward.
When she didn't get an answer Jessica prompted further; 'Why are you sad Dr. Robbins?' She didn't know who the other three doctors were so she spoke solely to her favourite surgeon.
'We were just remembering a sad story that's all Jess...now more importantly how are you?' Arizona plastered a smile on her face, instantly feeling better with the addition of her favourite patient. The other three doctors took the time to wipe their own faces and hide the fact that they had been crying from the new addition to their party.
'Ow...wellllll are you want to come to my room? We can have tea and cake and we can play onoply and...' The little one stopped as she underwent a huge coughing fit. Arizona rubbed her back until it ceased.
'Of course that sounds perfect, why don't you run along and get the tea on and I'll catch you up?'
'Ok!' She went to leave and then turned back to the group of surgeons. 'You can come too if you would be liking to?' She addressed the other women in the group, not wanting to be impolite.
'Oh well thank you very much but I think I have to be getting to a surgery...you enjoy yourself though.' Bailey gave both Ariozna and Callie a reassuring shoulder-squeeze before exiting through the double doors, with Teddy shortly following as she was already late to start her rounds.
'Would you like to come?' Jess addressed Callie, moving to stand in front of her.
'Well if that's ok then I would love to come.' Callie had calmed herself down, she knew that she wanted to talk with Arizona more about what happened, tell her version of events but she knew Jess was Arizona's favourite patient and she was quite enjoying seeing Arizona with her dimpled smile permanently back on her face. They let Jess run on ahead so that they had time to collect themselves.
'Arizona...I...'
'We'll take about it later baby...I don't want to have to dry my face all over again...and besides we'll be late for our tea party!' Callie laughed, kissed Arizona and pushed her round to Jessica's room.
For the next two hours Callie and Arizona stayed in Jess' room, and found themselves drinking tea, eating cake and locked in at intense game of monopoly. Arizona, even though Jess was only five, was as competitive as ever and determined to win. When the game finally ended Arizona was declared the winner much to her joy as she had more money than the other two put together.
'Dr. Torrs, are you a tiny human doctor like Dr. Robbins?' Jess asked as they all sat there, she was laid down in the bed obviously worn out from the afternoon.
'Nope, I'm a bone doctor. I mend broken bones and replace old ones...stuff like that.'
'Ohhh that sounds cool...I want to be a doctor when I am bigger...' She yawned.
'I think it's about time we left you too it Jess, you need to get some sleep before Dr. Foster comes round.' Dr. Foster was the acting head of department whilst Arizona was off and although Arizona didn't like his personality he was a very good surgeon.
'I don't like Dr. Fost...he's not as nice as you Dr. Robbins...' Jess mumbled.
'Jess I think you can call me Arizona...if that's ok?'
'Ari...Ari...' she struggled with Arizona's name.
'How about Zona? That's the name I use...and you can call me Callie.' Callie spoke now.
'Dr. Zona and Dr. Cal...' Jess smiled sleepily at them both before drifting off into sleep very quickly. Both Arizona and Callie smiled at each other.
'She's amazing.' Callie stated simply.
'Yeah, she's my favourite patient...I just wish there was more I could do for her you know?'
'Do you think she'll make it?'
'I honestly don't know...I've had kids come back from worse...but I've also seen kids die from a lot less...it's hard; she's got the fight left in her but I honestly don't know with this one Cal.'
'Well at least she's got the best surgeon.' Callie gave her a wink.
'Hmmm...in ten months...'
'That's when you can operate Zona...you can get back to work before then...'
'I know...I'm going to work out my plan of action for Jess whilst I'm stuck in the hospital anyway.'
'Where are her parents?' Callie asked realising that they'd been in Jess' room all afternoon without a sign or mention of them.
Arizona took a hefty sigh; 'They were killed in a car crash on their way to the hospital two months ago...'
'Oh my God! That's awful...why didn't you tell me?' Callie asked, they had often spoke about Jess but Arizona had never mentioned that they were dead.
'Think about where we were two months ago babe?'
'Oh..' Callie didn't have to think too long to remember that two months ago she and Arizona weren't on speaking terms after breaking up over the kids thing. 'Sorry.'
'It's ok, you weren't to know... I had to tell her...it was horrible Cal...and I'll be honest that was another thing that reinforced in my mind that I didn't want kids...the thought that something could happen to us and we would leave behind a child to fend for themselves...that thought terrifies me Cal...but it's something I'm willing to risk now...since that day... because I love you so much and I want to have kids with you...'
Callie had moved to be next to Arizona now and kissed her softly, the fact that she was saying again that she now wanted kids filled Callie with such happiness. 'Come on, let's get you back to your room babe, leave Jess to sleep.' Arizona nodded and let Callie wheel her out of the peds ward.
As they went back through the double doors neither of them gave thought to Gary Clark, both of them too busy thinking about little Jess and about each other. Once back in the room, Callie helped Arizona back into bed and took the seat next to her bed.
'Thank you.' Arizona said, as Callie laced her fingers into hers.
'What for?'
'For everything babe. For being there...for the service, for listening to what happened, for coming with me to spend time with Jess...for understanding...for loving me...'
'You never have to say thank you for that Zona...loving you is the most...easiest...amazing...rewarding thing I've ever done in my life and that fact is never going to change.'
Arizona didn't speak, she just patted the bed next to her and siddled over, Callie climbed in and instantly lifted her arm around Arizona, pulling her close.
'I love you so much Calliope Torres.'
'I love you too babe.'
'Will you stay here with me tonight?' Arizona asked. 'I mean in bed with me...please?'
'Of course babe, I can think of nothing I'd rather do more.' Callie and Arizona settled into each other enjoying the warmth of being back in bed with the woman they loved as they drifted off into sleep easily.
A/N: Reviews please guys :D