A/N: Well, I only had one person ask to continue, but I decided to update anyway before I left. Anyway, I think I'm going to make this humor as well, cuz I find this chapter, and the one's following, funny. It's kind of a silly chapter, but I like it. It's a bit short too. And after this chapter it will get more into the plot and all the conflicty goodness. Mary might be OOC. Or maybe not. She's just displaying her jealousy.

Also, Richard and Mary are fairly good friends, so that might help things to make more sense. Oh, and please R/R so I can know what you think! Thanks!

The assembly ended and the very next day found the Lucas' calling on the Bennets to discuss the ball. Mary marked in her mind with disgust how the conversation dare turn to Mr. Darcy's pride and how he labeled Elizabeth's appearance as merely tolerable. Apparently it was a most evil thing for him to call her tolerable. Never mind the fact most of Hertfordshire had been calling herself plain for years, with few barely batting an eyelash.

"Oh, but of course, everyone loves Lizzy and caters to her," Mary thought spitefully to herself. "Any who dare say anything of negativity towards her should go to the gallows, for it would be most deserving."

"I could easily forgive his pride, if he had not mortified mine," (1) she heard Eliza say.

"Oh, yes!" Mary thought. "It is oh so mortifying for one mere man to think you're looks tolerable. Please!"

"Pride," Mary entered in calmly, "is a very common failing, I believe. (Which most of you have possessed at one time or another, so perhaps you should forget about Mr. Darcy's and worry about your own!) By all that I have ever read, I am convinced that it is very common indeed, that human nature is prone to it, and that there are very few of us who do not cherish a feeling of self-complacency on the score of some quality or other, real or imaginary. (Mary tried to ignore how much this sounded like herself, telling her it was something the others needed to hear.) Vanity and pride are different things, though the words are often used synonymously. A person may be proud without being vain. Pride relates more to our opinion of ourselves; vanity to what we would have others think of us. (So it's your vanity that's 'mortified' Elizabeth. It might be helpful if you got over yourself!)" (2)

This insight was unsurprisingly brushed off as the young Lucas boy got in a childish argument with her mother. Mary endured no more than a moment of this before exiting the room to head off upstairs.

"I suppose I shall take company to my books!" Mary muttered. "For they listen to me better than most humans do."

It was shortly after this that Mary was finally able to vent her feelings. A large party had assembled itself at the Lucas' and Mr. Singleton was in attendance. Mr. Singleton was one of the few she counted as a friend, for she never felt judged when speaking to him. She had a habit of saying more to him than she did others, though perhaps she said a little too much at times, for she had a habit of complaining about her family. This, though, she brushed off because she found him to be someone she could trust and a little venting did her some good.

Mary was observing Elizabeth's behavior towards Mr. Darcy when Mr. Singleton approached.

"Hello there, Miss Mary!"

Mary gave Richard a serious look

"Mr. Singleton, have you not heard about the most grievous evil that has taken place?" she asked him gravely.

Mr. Singleton looked nervous.

"I-is everything alright, Mary?"

"Is everything alright, he asks!" Mary said incredulously. "Ha! How can anything be alright? Do you see Elizabeth talking to that Mr. Darcy over there?"

"Yes."

"Well! That-that...MAN had the nerve of calling Lizzy's appearance tolerable! Tolerable! Everyone is in such uproar about it!"

Richard smirked at the sarcasm dripping from Mary's voice.

"Can you imagine?" Mary continued. "How can anyone say such a dreadful thing about our dear, sweet Lizzy? He is hated by all, as well he should be! And Elizabeth wants to have nothing to do with him!

Never mind the fact that I have been called plain by most of Hertfordshire. I say, if I had written all those people out of my acquaintance it would be most improper and I would barely have any acquaintances left! Not to mention that would include my two younger sisters, and my mother oft times! "

Richard gave her a sad smile but Mary continued.

"Oh but not Lizzy! No one should say a negative thing about Lizzy! One mere, stupid man out of all the men she's ever met and will ever meet called her tolerable." Mary mockingly threw a distressed hand to her forehead. "I don't see how the world goes on through such an evil!"

Richard chuckled at Mary's antics. Though he felt sorry for her at times, her jealousy of her sisters could be amusing. He was very glad, though, that the party was loud with chatter and no one was near them to hear it.

Mary bolted upright in her seat.

"Come! Let us go to the window to see how the world fares through this." She said. She stood up quickly and charged to the window in the hallway, placing her teacup on a small, nearby table. Richard followed, chuckling as he went.

Mary peered out the window.

"Look at that!" she exclaimed. "How dare it! How dare it! The world, it goes on! It is still operating in its normal fashion despite all the wickedness that has occurred."

Mary turned to a laughing Richard.

"Do you hear that?" she asked in astonishment. "Do you hear that cricket? It is chirping! Chirping I say! How dare it chirp! How dare it!"

Mary turned towards the open window.

"Stop it! Stop it this instant!" She called. "It is a most grievous evil!"

Richard sides hurt from his laughter.

"Please cease with the sermonizing, Mary! We're an old married couple and this is our house after all."

Mary and Richard looked out the window to see Sir and Lady Lucas a few feet off in the darkness, wrapped in a warm embrace.

"Oh, sorry," she called out the window in embarrassment. Richard sat on the floor in laughter, barely able to keep himself up, tears streaming down his face. Mary slid onto the floor next to him, very embarrassed.

"Oh my, that was embarrassing." she said, with a horrified look on her face. Richard laughed harder in response.

"Oh there you are, Richard!" Mr. Jenson said, walking into the hall. Mr. Jenson stopped and looked at the scene before him. Mary and Richard were both sitting on the floor, the latter laughing as if he never laughed before, and the former looking mortified.

"Is everything alright?" Mr. Jenson asked. Mary's eyes met Mr. Jenson's.

"No. A most grievous evil has occurred." Mary shot a look up at the window. "Two actually."

Richard continued laughing. Mr. Jenson groaned.

"Please Mary; you know Richard is the only one who finds your sermons tolerable," he said, walking off.

"T-tolerable!" Mr. Singleton stuttered out, and continued laughing.

"That was quite rude!" Mary said, watching Mr. Jensen's retreating figure. Mr. Singleton eventually calmed down and the pair stood up.

"I must ask, Miss Mary, how much sugar have you put in your tea this evening?"

"Oh I don't know," she said. She took the teacup she placed on the table and took a sip from it. "I've been awfully bored and all I've been doing is drinking tea to occupy myself. And I hate the taste of tea so I put a good amount of sugar in it."

Mr. Singleton stopped Mary from taking another sip, took the cup, and placed it on the table.

"Perhaps you should drink water for the rest of the evening," he said.

"Oh!" Mary exclaimed. "Someone is playing the piano! It's probably Lizzy, she's such a show off! I must have my turn at the instrument as well."

Mary entered the sitting room and approached the piano where Elizabeth was finishing her song.

"Come now, Lizzy. Let me have a go on the piano forte." Mary said, shooing her sister off. Elizabeth got up, looking slightly irritated, while the rest of the crowd looked disappointed. Mary flipped through a music book and found what she wanted.

"Oh yes! I've been practicing this one all week!" she said. "Mr. Singleton, do you mind turning the pages for me?"

Richard smiled.

"I'd be glad to."

Mary started off her long concerto, while the guests watched her in boredom or ignored her. Mr. Singleton, however, found her playing interesting, or perhaps it was the player he was interested in. Her manner was outwardly conceited and pedantic but as he watched her closely he saw something else. He saw passion in her eyes as she played, as if all her hopes and dreams were being placed into the very piece she was playing. Her normally grey eyes lit up and Mr. Singleton noted flecks of blue in them. Mr. Singleton was preoccupied in thought, until the said object of his interest stopped and looked up at him impatiently.

"Well, aren't you going to turn the page?" she asked.

"Oh!" Mr. Singleton exclaimed, coming out of his thoughts. He looked anxiously around the room to see people staring curiously at him. Mr. Jenson was next to him, snickering. It was to him Richard muttered:

"I fear I cannot concentrate on turning pages, please take my place."

Mr. Jenson smirked at him.

"And why not?"

"Just do it, or I'll tell Maria Lucas you'd like to hear about the new dress she received for her birthday."

Mr. Jenson shot a mortified look in Maria's direction and quickly agreed to Richard's pleas.

"Miss Mary," Mr. Jenson announced. "I'm afraid I'll have to take Richard's place, for he is quite muddle headed at the moment and cannot concentrate on page turning."

Richard shot a deadly glare at Mr. Jenson, who smiled innocently at him.

"Fine, just pay attention and don't mess up." Mary said, with an impatient glance at Richard. Richard smiled sheepishly.

Mary finished her long concerto and received a polite applause from most, and a genuine applause from Mr. Singleton. Kitty and Lydia rushed up to the piano.

"Oh Mary, do play something we can dance to!" Kitty exclaimed. "Like a Scotch or Irish air!"

Mary looked scandalized.

"Richard, you should join us." Lydia said. "It's much more interesting than staring at Mary."

Mr. Jenson snorted in his drink, but was quickly apprehended by Maria Lucas.

"Oh Mr. Jenson! You turn the pages quite nicely!" she said, dotingly. "You must join us in dancing."

Mr. Jenson gave Maria a forced smile and it was Mr. Singleton's turn to snort into his drink. But alas, the two shared each others fate as they were dragged from the piano to dance with the 3 girls, along with some of the Lucas' and a few officers.

Mary glared at the scene and unwillingly started a few silly Scotch and Irish airs that the crowd seemed more entertained by than her long practiced concerto.

"Cretins." she muttered.

1. Page 21. Volume I, Chapter 5 of Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

2. Page 21, Volume I, Chapter 5 of Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (Minus what's contained in parenthesis of course)