AN: Odd chapter, but it has a purpose. My opinion: It's alright, kind of funny. I read it a few times and I couldn't think of what else to do or how to change it so I hope it's okay.

I just want to thank any anonymous reviews that I've received for past chapters but didn't have an email address. I believe I haven't thanked:

Wen – Glad you like the story! I know, we need more hot guys go for plain girls story. Sometimes it's hot girl likes hot guy but hardly ever the other way.

I think/hope that's it. If not, thanks to any I've forgotten!!

The rest of February went by and brought a change in Mary's countenance. She was still fairly sad but she gradually began to feel better without really noticing. Thoughts of Mr. Collins still brought feelings of distress but those thoughts were fewer and practically nonexistent in Mr. Singleton's presence. With Mary being slightly more cheerful Richard seemed to be a little happier as well though not entirely; there was often a slight distressed air about him.

Lizzy left with Sir Lucas and Maria to visit Charlotte in Hunsford one cold day in the beginning of March. It was then another odd change occurred inside of Mary. She began to feel as if she missed Lizzy. She thought perhaps it was because Lizzy was the only sensible sister left since Jane went to London. The fact that she missed Jane was understandable. Though Jane's perfect beauty made Mary want to vomit she was easily the most amiable Bennet. Now Mary was left alone with two obnoxious sisters, a silly mother, and an unconcerned father.

The Sunday after Elizabeth left for Hunsford Mr. Singleton approached Mary with most shocking news. He sat down silently next to Mary with a horrified expression on his face.

"It has come to my attention that I am now a father," he said.

Mary's heart stopped and a feeling of dread swept over her. It couldn't be! She felt distraught, more distraught than she would think she would feel and she couldn't understand why. To feel sorry for him or to feel disappointed in his actions was understandable, but another feeling was present and she couldn't figure out what it was.

"Mr. Singleton, what in the world happened? I mean, I know what happened but what I mean to say is...what did you do?"

Richard laughed.

"Rascal is, apparently, female and this morning he...or rather, she...decided to make this fact known by giving birth to 5 tiny kittens on my favorite coat."

Mary gave a sigh of relief and then burst into laughter.

"Mr. Singleton, you and your clothes just don't have the best of luck, do they?"

"Not when it comes to that stupid cat!" he exclaimed. Mr. Singleton got a faraway look in his eyes as his voice softened, "It seems like only yesterday I was rescuing that tiny stray kitten in the middle of a rainstorm. And now...and now she's having kittens of her own!" Richard sniffed but then his voice grew rough. "If only I could get my hands on the neck of that scoundrel of a tomcat!"

Mary snickered at Richard.

"You know, perhaps it's the parents fault in cases such as these," she teased.

"Oh so you don't think she's responsible for her own actions?" he joked. "Believe me if I had known she was a girl I would have locked her in her room until she was thirty!"

"And what difference does being a girl make?" Mary asked.

"It's the difference of a clean or dirty coat!"

"Very well, but tell me Mr. Singleton, how did you not know Rascal was a female?" she said laughing.

"Well apparently you were unaware of the fact yourself!" he said defensively.

"I'm terribly sorry for finding no interest in randomly checking a cat's gender, but if I owned a cat I suppose it would be a matter of importance to know before it was 'made known' all over my clothing."

"Alright, you win!" Richard laughed. "You may have one, if you like. Better yet, you may have all of them since you're such a wonderful young lady and deserve such felicity."

Mary laughed.

"Perhaps not all, but I might like to take one. I have to ask my mother and father first."

"Alright then, I'll reserve five cuddly kittens just for you!"

"One."

"Five."

"One."

"Four."

"One."

"Three?"

"One."

"Two!"

"None."

"One! One! One cuddly kitten for the bright and beautiful Miss Mary Bennet!"

"That's much better." She said. "I shouldn't have to take the responsibility for your parenting mistakes or your laziness either!"

Richard laughed.

"That's alright, I'm sure I'll find homes for them. I might like to keep one as well." Richard looked over at the doorway. "Oh wonderful, there's Fredrick. Just the person I want to see. He's been complaining of boredom lately. Perhaps four adorable kittens can bring amusement to his pathetic life. Pardon me Miss Mary."

Mary laughed as Richard got up and hastened to the door.

"Oh Fredrick!" he called as he walked off. "Since you're such a good friend I have a very special surprise for you to cheer your dreary countenance!"

At lunchtime Mary sat at the table sending nervous glances her family's way. Lydia and Kitty were chattering incessantly, Mrs. Bennet was bothering her husband about nonsense, and Mr. Bennet was ignoring her while giving his complete attention to his newspaper.

"Ahem." Mary cleared her throat.

"So I told her he wouldn't pick her over me if she were the last female on earth..."

"Why did she even think so in the first place?"

"Mr. Bennet the girls need new dresses, I won't hear otherwise."

"Yes dear..."

"Ahem!"

"I don't know but she had the audacity to contradict me!"

"Oh please, what does she know?"

"And shoes, we must get them shoes."

"Yes dear..."

"Ahem!"

"Well, nothing I suppose. She never was very bright."

"That is true; she's completely daft in my opinion."

"And they must have bonnets to match, of course."

"Yes dear."

"AHEM!"

The Bennets turned and looked at Mary.

"Mary! For heaven's sake, girl, take a drink of water!" Her mother said.

"Mr.Singleton'scathadkittens." Mary said very quickly, hoping to get it out before they returned to their conversations. Her family looked at her in bewilderment.

"What did she say?" Kitty asked.

"Perhaps her brain has finally wore out and this is the result." Lydia said.

"Mary, speak clearly like a proper young lady if you ever expect to interest a young man. My poor nerves."

"I don't think speaking clearly is her problem." Lydia muttered to Kitty. Mary ignored this.

"Mr. Singleton's cat had kittens." Mary said. "H-he's offered to let me have one."

Everyone looked at Mary, surprised at her odd request. A kitten was not something she was accustomed to be interested in. Mr. Bennet raised his eyebrows in amusement.

"Absolutely not!" Mrs. Bennet said.

"But mamma, we live on a farm."

"Mr. Bennet tell your daughter-"

"If Mr. Singleton wants to give Mary a cat I don't see why she shouldn't accept it." He said unconcernedly, turning back to his newspaper.

Mary smiled at her father even though he wasn't looking.

"Fine, one kitten but no more!"

"I don't see why I can't have a kitten; my name is Kitty after all!"

Mary rolled her eyes.

"Fine, two kittens but that's it." Mrs. Bennet said.

Mary stared at her mother incredulously. She was so reluctant to let her have a cat but she had no qualms about letting Kitty have one.

"Well that's not fair!" Lydia whined. "Why do they each get a kitten and I don't?"

"Fine, you may have Mary's cat." Mrs. Bennet said.

"Excuse me!" Mary exclaimed in anger. Everyone looked at her in surprise. "I asked first, why does she get it?"

"Because she younger." Her mother answered matter-of-factly.

"But that's not fair! Mr. Singleton offered ME the cat, not Lydia!"

"Oh please, he offered the cat to the family. It's not my fault he saw you first to ask you." Lydia said. "As if he were giving you special privilege, please. Quit being a baby. What would you do with a kitten anyway? Sermonize to the poor thing all day? It'll die of boredom within a week."

Kitty and Lydia snickered.

"Oh shut up Lydia!" Mary said. Everyone, even Mary herself was surprised at her behavior, yet Mary did not care. She continued "And quit saying please all the time, you sound like a parrot who only knows one word!"

"Mother! Are you going to let her talk to me like that?"

"Mary, I will not have you questioning my judgment or talking like that to your sister." Her Mother said.

Mary looked furiously around the table. Kitty and Lydia were snickering and her mother looked at her in disapproval. Her father looked surprised, but then turned back to his paper not wanting to be involved.

"Fine!" Mary exclaimed, slamming her book shut and standing up. "Just fine! If that's the way you want it, fine!"

"Speaking of parrots," Lydia muttered and Kitty giggled.

Mary threw Lydia a spiteful look and scooted her chair in with such force that it crashed into the table. Mary then turned swiftly on her heel, stomped out of the room, and up the stairs. She threw open her bedroom door causing it to slam against the wall and hurled her book down so that it crashed loudly on the floor.

"It's obvious there are favorites in this house, and I'm none of them. But I suppose it's better then being a spoiled brat." she muttered, picking up random things and slamming them down again, barely knowing what she was doing. Her coat fell off the mirror and Mary saw her haggard looking reflection. She screeched and threw the coat back over the mirror.

Finally, she picked up the book she mercilessly threw on the floor and then walked out of her room, slamming the door once more. She stomped down the hall and into the dining room. Her family, who had been sitting there quietly staring at each other as they heard her stomp, screeched, and slam around in her room, looked at her in bewilderment.

"I am going for a walk. I don't know where I'm going, and I don't know when I'll be back." She told them with finality in her voice. They stared at her, still shocked at her outburst. She stomped out of the room toward the front door, exited the house, and slammed the door. Her family exchanged glances once again.

"Well!" Lydia exclaimed. "Apparently being the baby of the family isn't dependant on age order."

Kitty snorted.

Mr. Bennet sighed and put his paper down.

"My dear," he said to his wife. "Mr. Singleton did offer the cat to Mary. I think he wanted her to have it."

"Oh please, Mr. Bennet." His wife said. "It's as Lydia said: it was an offer to the family."

Mr. Bennet gave her an amused look then went back to his paper. He would never forgive his dear Lizzy for leaving him in such chaos.

Mary trampled through the woods muttering about the idiocy of her family, her low place in the hierarchy of her household, what she would like to do Lydia, and the overall injustices of the world.

Mary kicked at a tree.

"Dear Miss Mary, what did the tree do to you?" she heard a voice joke behind her.

Mary turned around. The voice belonged to none other than Mr. Singleton whose joking countenance fell upon seeing Mary's displeasure.

"Mary, what's all this about?" He said frowning. "We really ought to stop meeting like this."

"Hello, Mr. Singleton." Mary said through gritted teeth. "I just asked my parents if I could have one of the kittens. My mother reluctantly agreed. Then Kitty informed us that she would like a cat. Mother had no qualms about her having one. Sweet, sweet Lydia intruded and whined that it was unfair. So my DEAR mother decided that Lydia should have MY Cat because she didn't want more than two in the house!"

"Miss Mary, I'm terribly sorry." Richard said with a frown. And he was sorry, it was Mary he wished to give the cat to.

"You'll never believe her reasoning! 'Lydia is younger.' She said. BALDERDASH!! Jane and Lizzy always receive things I can't have because they are 'older' and Lydia and Kitty always get things because they're younger! Where is the logic in that? When I have I ever received anything for simply being the middle child? NEVER! Obviously my parents hold a special favoritism for all their children except for me!"

"Well, if you want me to I'll refuse to give Lydia the cat. I'll tell that dratted family of yours that I want YOU to have it."

Mary gave him a small smile.

"Thanks Mr. Singleton but please give Lydia the cat. I'd rather not have to put up with her. Besides, let her become even more fat and spoiled than she already is. Perhaps she'll EXPLODE with all the indulgence! My dearest wish is that I'll be of witness when that occurs!"

Mr. Singleton eyebrows rose in surprise but he couldn't help snickering.

"Alright Mary. Your wish is my command. I will allow your dear sister to explode if that is what you desire."

"Thank you."

"You are exceedingly morbid, you know."

"And again, I thank you." Mary said darkly. "Besides, it's the principle of the matter. I asked first, not that idiotic Lydia. She's so...IDIOTIC."

"I gathered that."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Singleton. All I do is complain and yet you don't hesitate to offer a kind, listening ear."

"Well, I'll admit there is some truth to what you say." He said. "And you have to remember that Mr. Jenson is my closest friend and he is one of the worst complainers in all of Hertfordshire. If I can put up with him, I can certainly put up with you. Or anyone else for that matter."

Mary laughed.

"I suppose your right." Mary said. She eyed the fishing poles Richard was carrying. "Are you off to fish?"

"Yes. Would you care to join me? It's much more entertaining than kicking poor, defenseless trees."

Mary blushed and giggled.

"Well, I don't think it's proper for a woman to fish but I suppose I'll sit with you and read."

Mary and Richard journeyed over to a small lake in the woods. Richard spent this journey in silent contemplation, staring at the ground, while Mary told him about the new book she was reading. Once they reached the lake Mary questioned him about this.

"Oh." Richard said, thrown off by the question. "I'm alright, I was just thinking about…what you were saying." He said. His tense demeanor quickly fell away and he took up the occupation of provoking Mary. "Are you sure you don't want to try a hand at fishing?"

"No no, I'd rather partake in much more enlightening activities." She said as she sat down and opened her book.

Richard smirked.

"Yes, I forgot. You're a silly buffoon who can't even run. It's only logical you can't fish either."

Mary put her book down and glared at Richard.

"You better tame that tongue of yours, Mr. Singleton, or I'll shove you into the lake!"

Richard chortled.

"Mary was a buffoon who couldn't run

She only read and had no fun

She had not a wish

To try to fish

For she could catch not a one"

Mary threw her book down and stomped over to Richard. Richard was slightly frightened and wondered if she would shove him into the lake.

"Give me that!" she snapped, snatching the fishing pole from Richard. She stood there for a moment, stupidly glancing from the pole, to Richard, to the lake. "So…how do I do this?"

Richard laughed and took the pole from her, showed her how to cast, and instructed her on what to do. Mary took the pole back from him and stood there looking nervously at the lake. Richard smiled at the endearing sight.

"Oh my!" Mary exclaimed as her line tugged suddenly. She followed Mr. Singleton's orders and tried to reel it in with vain effort.

"You can help you know!" she yelled to Mr. Singleton who was standing there stupefied that Mary had already caught a fish. He quickly ran over to her, blushed, and placed his hands over hers as they reeled the fish in together.

It wasn't a very large fish but its size was significant enough.

"I must say, Miss Mary. Most people don't catch fish so fast, especially not on their first try." Richard said, holding up the fish to look at it. "You must have a real knack for fishing."

"Fifteen fish!" Mr. Singleton exclaimed as Mary and he were walking back to her house later. "You caught fifteen fish in 2 hours and I didn't catch a single thing!"

Mary laughed.

"I wouldn't say you didn't catch a single thing." She said with a mischievous smirk. "You did catch that old boot after all."

"Correction. I caught two old boots." Richard said.

"Actually it was the same boot, I believe. You did throw it back in after the first time you caught it."

"Ah yes, well I had no need for that old, wet boot."

"Then why didn't you throw it in the second time?"

"I was tired of catching that silly thing." Richard said.

"Well, perhaps if you threw it in again you wouldn't have caught nothing afterwards." Mary teased.

"Well pardon me. I would think that if someone lost their boot in a lake they would have the courtesy of throwing their other one in so highly skilled fishermen like myself could catch both."

"I thought you were tired of catching boots, Mr. Highly Skilled Fisherman."

"Correction again. I was tired of catching the same boot. I hoped to catch the other boot."

"Why the preference for the one boot and not the other?"

"For one, I'm left-footed. Two, there was no preference, I wanted both boots."

"I never knew you were left-footed, Mr. Singleton. But do tell; if you don't know what to do with one old, wet boot what in the world will you do with two old, wet boots?"

"It's simple logic Miss Mary. There's not much you can do with one boot. One always needs two. Unless they cut one of their legs off."

"Speaking of being morbid." Mary said, smirking.

"Speaking of throwing stuff back in the lake. What in the world were you thinking, throwing all those fish back in?"

"Oh, I don't know." Mary said. "I couldn't bring myself to kill them."

"Mary! You EAT fish! And you shoved a hook through their mouths!"

"I know but it's completely different from killing them directly."

"Oh bother! Women!" Richard said. He eyed her irritably. "You should have at least kept the twenty three inch bass!"

"Yes, I suppose I should have let it suffer and die since it almost pulled me into the lake." Mary said. Richard wished very much that it had pulled her in. Not that he wanted Mary to drown, but he wouldn't have minded the opportunity of rescuing her.

"It would figure that I would finally discover something I'm good at and it's something I can't do openly."

"Oh come now, Miss Mary. Where does the Bible say 'Thou woman shall not fish!'?" Richard said. "Just approach your family and say 'Dear family. I can fish and I will fish. If you don't like it than...stick a feather in your cap and call it macaroni!'"

Mary looked at Mr. Singleton then burst into laughter.

"You, sir, are odd."

"And yet you're my friend. What does that make you?"

"Long suffering."

"Oh, haha."

"In either case, I much prefer to keep my life to myself. It's more interesting that way."

Richard gave her another mischievous grin.

"Oh yes. Miss Mary and her secret encounters with the dashing Mr. Singleton."

Mary snorted.

"Well when you put it that way, if it was a choice between a dull life that was an open book or an interesting one full of secret encounters with this 'dashing Mr. Singleton' I'd much rather take the dull life." she teased.

Mr. Singleton stopped in his tracks.

"Did you hear that Mary?"

"Hear what?" she said, stopping to look at him.

"That crash."

"What crash?" Mary asked. Worry started creeping over her.

"That was my heart shattering into a million pieces."

Mary rolled her eyes, but giggled.

"I do have to say, Miss Mary. You are not without quick wit yourself. I don't see how everyone thinks Lizzy inherited all of it."

"Well, perhaps I just save it all for you. There's so much to make fun of you about after all."

"Oh, is that so? You know, it's been said that teasing is a disguise for hidden feelings."

"Feelings of irritability?"

Richard looked at Mary, smiled, and not watching where he was going, ran sharply into a tree. Mary looked down at Mr. Singleton's sprawled figure on the ground and burst into laughter.

"Mr. Singleton! What in the world happened?"

Mr. Singleton sat up and put a hand to the side of his face.

"Oh my poor, dear face! I marred my beautiful face." He said.

Mary snorted and knelt beside him to peer at his poor, marred face.

"There's not but a small scratch. It's not even bleeding." She said. "You're beautiful face is fine."

Richard looked at Mary and smiled.

"So you agree my face is beautiful?"

"Yes," she said "like a pretty little girl."

"You are very kind to poor young men with fatal wounds. I suppose I shall be bedridden the rest of my life, never to see the light of day again, for my poor face is now wretched and I am dying and you have not a care."

"Oh but I do care. I'll visit your grave everyday." Mary said.

"You will?" he asked hopefully.

"Well, once a month if I have the time. Now get up."

"You have no compassion for my poor face."

"Stop it. You sound like my mother."

Richard looked up at Mary and pouted.

"Well I'm not going to kiss and make it better if that's what you desire." She said.

Mr. Singleton blushed but smiled.

"If you did that, Mary, I would mar my face everyday until I hadn't a face left."

"Oh please. Come on!"

Mary and Richard arrived at Longbourn and after saying their goodbyes, Richard left. Mary, hiding behind a large tree at the edge of her family's property, looked down at her dirty clothes. She was a complete mess and she smelled like fish. She couldn't appear before her family in such a state. She crept along the edge of the forest to the back of her house. Crouching low she snuck to the back door of the house hiding behind various and a sundry objects along the way: a haystack, a wheelbarrow, a cow. She arrived at the back door and slowly opened it. Peeking into the kitchen she saw her luck. Only the cook was present and she had her back turned as she stirred something in a pot. Mary crept past her quietly.

"Girl!" The cook exclaimed. Frightened Mary stopped dead in her tracks and looked at the cook guiltily but the cook still had her back turned.

"Put this bowl in the sink before you leave." The cook said, passing her a dirty bowl with barely a glance at her. The cook thought her to be a simple maid.

"Yes ma'am." Mary said as she slightly altered her voice, hoping to disguise it.

Mary took the bowl, placed it in the sink, and exited out of the kitchen quickly. She entered into the dining room which was, thankfully, empty for dinner still wasn't until the next hour. Quickly and quietly she swept through the room and peered into the abandoned hallway. She entered that and crept past her father's study. The door was shut and she assumed her father was in there. She came to the sitting room, and peeked in to see Kitty, Lydia, and Mrs. Bennet idling away the time. Mrs. Bennet had fallen asleep, and Kitty and Lydia were gossiping and giggling over something.

"It would figure they weren't concerned over me." She thought. "I'm sure they assumed I was merely reading. Well, I showed them!"

Mary peeked back into the room, and once Kitty and Lydia had a significant fit of giggles, she darted past the doorway. Hearing no exclamation of the acknowledgement of her arrival Mary gave a sigh of relief and, smiling to herself, quickened her pace. She was feeling very good about herself until she turned the corner to head up the stairs and ran sharply into someone. Mary's eyes flew up in horror.

"Please don't be father!" She thought and looked at her captor. She was fortunate for she merely ran into a servant.

"Oh I'm sorry Mi-"

Mary hushed her. The servant quickly shut her mouth.

"Follow me." Mary whispered. The servant obeyed and followed Mary to her room. Mary could tell the servant was eyeing her tattered state, wondering what had happened.

"Is everything alright Miss?" the servant whispered.

Mary smiled.

"Yes, but I need you to draw me a bath and take my clothes to wash them."

"Alright Miss." The servant said. The servant appeared nervous.

Mary snickered.

"Oh don't worry! I've done nothing scandalous!" Mary said. "I merely went fishing and fell in the lake."

"Fishing, Miss?" The servant said.

"Okay, so it wasn't the most proper activity for a young lady, but it's not like I killed anyone. After all, can you tell me where in the Bible it says 'Thou woman shall not fish.'?"

"No-nowhere Miss that I know of."

"Exactly! And anyone who says otherwise can...can stick a feather in their cap and call it macaroni!"

The servant gave her a curious look.

"Yes Miss. I'll go draw your bath while you undress."

"Thank you." Mary said and the servant exited the room. Mary fell upon her bed and laughed.

"To think that I have done such a thing that could find disapproval." Mary said to herself. "Something worth sneaking around about. There was something thrilling about it all however."

Mary laughed again yet noticed her heart had been racing in turmoil.

"I daresay I shant do such a thing again though."

Mary remembered her clothes had still been dirty and stood up quickly, frowning at her soiled bed.

"Oh dear, I had forgotten about that." She said. "Now my bed smells of fish as well. Betsy will have to take the bed sheet to wash along with my clothes."

After her bath Mary spent the rest of the hour in her room reading until supper. When she came down for supper her family was surprised to see her. When inquired as to when she came back, she merely stated she'd been there for an hour with emotionless unconcern. But as she sat there, she couldn't help but smile. She hadn't known what came over her! She should have been mad at them. And she was still supposed to be mourning her loss of Mr. Collins, yet all she could do was smile. And with a shock she realized she hadn't thought of Mr. Collins all day.

Firstly: Richard rescuing a kitten in a rainstorm is hot. Heehee. Anyway, I decided to give Mary one little crazy rebellious action, even though it's really not that big of a deal. It would fit in how I picture her, especially since she was so worried about it LOL. Same with her archaic view of women. As for 15 fish. I dunno, maybe that was unrealistically a lot. But when I was on vacation I had never fished before and I got like 6 in 15 minutes. So I don't know. 15 fish just sounded better than 10 or 11 or 6 or whatever. Anyway, hope you liked it. Maybe it was kinda dumb but oh well.