Name: War Among Wars

Rating: Mature, for some sexual content, swearing, and dark themes.

Summary: Whammy's boarding school is the enemy of anybody unwilling to be under the control of Light, the leader of the secret society, and L is one of those enemies. Light is cause of the whole meltdown of everything, starting with his senior year.

Pairings: LightxL, NearxBB, MelloxMatt, MatsudaxMisa.

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-Ken

b e f o r e w e s t a r t t h e s t o r y

"I was wondering, if maybe I could borrow something very personal of his." The day light was too bright today, it made my eyes hurt. Today is a very sad day. All I wanted was to understand this whole mess. Even after all this time I can't let go, I want to know him the way everyone else knew him. He's the only thing I hang onto, the only thing that gets me through each day.

The proud man I consider his father sits across from me. His hair is white and he faintly reminds me of a butler instead of a father figure. I remember how fondly L would talk about him. His mustache twitches with every word that slips from my mouth. Even after three years...I suppose that's not long enough for the hate to fade away. Even if he says it wasn't my fault, I do know the truth behind it all. It was my fault. I should have seen the signs. I should have done something to stop him, hold him with his last breath. At least comfort him in his time of need.

"I think I know what you're here for, Light Yagami. The letters I presume?" The older male is much smarter then anyone suspects, and I do enjoy his company, although my throat clenches so painfully whenever we are together. It's a pain I am is used to. I try to smile with politeness, but it never quite reaches my eyes. Has it already been six years? It feels much longer, like 100 years.

"Yes, those." I answer, I want to add more, to thank him, but I can't get my emotions in check for that. I don't want to feel this way anymore. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, not ever.

"Very well." The man pulls something out his pocket, the letter. They are the last piece of L that is left on the earth. Watari must have known I was coming for it sooner or later. "I always kept it in my pocket whenever you paid a visit." He knows I was wondering about it. Clever man indeed. I know where L gets his best qualities from. Watari is a great man, better then I will ever be.

I was a terrible person during my high school years. I scoured the school for victims. The students, teachers, and the school had been clay in my hands. Ready for me to mold. I was the leader of that place. I made every single student humiliated, even the ones I rather liked. L was no exception. I found myself wanting to tease him a bit more, torture him. I don't know exactly why I felt that way, but I did. I am truly ashamed. How I had friends I'll never know.

I often went by the nickname Kira, one that some frightened freshmen spread around the school. I liked it, it was powerful and eye catching. It was everything I needed it to be. Kira became me, and I became Kira. Light did not exist during those dark years. I have no excuses though.

"Do you-" I begin to ask a question I ask every time I see this old man and his watchful gaze.

"No, I do not believe it was your fault. L was unhappy. He wanted to control one thing in his life." Watari grips the chair tightly, as if getting that out was hard. It must have been hard.

"There was time, we could have saved him" I bury my face in his hands, a common thing I did when I felt weak. It was pathetic I know it was. L killed himself 6 years ago. Honestly, it was out of love I suppose. I am not exactly sure why he did it, but I don't think I want to know. These letters hold every answer I need. They are not only letters, but diary entries L had written, and Watari had gotten a hold of after his accident.

It was my fault that L Lawliet is dead, and it's a very long story.

Dear Watari,

I fear you've made a big mistake. I don't belong here. I know I have been hard to handle, and you're just trying to do what is best for me, but here is not good at all. I am miserable. Nobody here is sane. They're all under the influence of cruelest man I've ever met. He's mean, incredibly cocky, and I believe he's out to get me. I bet right now you are probably thinking I'm being paranoid. That I'm just trying to make things up in order to win your favor. Please, listen to me. I'm not kidding. Ever since the first day he's hated me. All I feel on my back is his un-yielding stare. It's always there. I don't know what I did, or if it's what I haven't gone. All I know is that I won't last here. The food is awful, barely any sweets to go around, nobody looks anybody in the eye, and there is no such thing as justice. Please reconsider your thoughts about me staying here. It may have been successful for you as a boy, but times have changed. Everything where isn't black or white, it's all in between. It's a mess. I heard some rumors about an assignment I'll have to do. I'm terrified. I won't be able to back down. I'll be at the mercy of whatever he wants me to do.

Kira has my soul from now on.

Ps. Send some cookies?

Love,

L Lawliet