Yeah. So, when I stalked outside, in my fit of fury and frustration, Adam and Hannah were sitting in the porch swing.

Brian and Clare weren't in sight.

I paused, and let out a huge, long breath, and met their eyes.

"Are you alright?" Hannah asked. Which, really-what sort of a question is that? But, what could I say?

"Yeah," I said.

"Come sit down a minute, sugar," Adam told me.

"Do I have to?" I asked. "I mean do I have to, right this minute?"

"I guess not," he said.

"Can I go for a ride?" I asked.

"Where do you plan to ride to?" Adam asked.

"To the canyon, maybe," I said.

"That's a far distance," he said. "How about somewhere that's closer?"

I could tell by the way he said it, that it wasn't really a suggestion at all.

"Alright, I'll just go to the creek," I said.

Adam nodded in agreement, and I went down the front steps and towards the tack shed to get my saddle.

I saddled Charlie, and rode off. I went to the creek, where I left Charlie ground-tied, and sat at the edge of

the water. The breeze blowing in and across the water was a chilly one. I wished that I'd brought a jacket along.

I tossed sticks and rocks into the water, and I don't think it was very long after that, that I heard someone

walking thru the grass.

I only looked because I wanted to make sure it wasn't Daniel. If it was, well, I was going to-well, I wasn't sure, but

I wasn't going to talk anymore at this point.

It wasn't Daniel, but Guthrie. He came and sat down beside me on the grass, gathering up his own

handful of small stones to begin tossing into the water.

For a few minutes, neither one of us said anything.

"Sorry I left you like that," I said. "I had to get out of there."

"I know."

"I don't like the way things keep popping out. It's like a giant onion, that has all this layers to it. You have one peeled

away, and there's more underneath," I said.

"Yep," he said, in agreement, and tossed a rock.

"It's crazy, don't you think?" I asked him.

"I think it's beyond crazy," Guthrie said. I looked to my right at him, feeling so glad at that moment that I had Guthrie-at

least we had each other in this.

"Is he gonna give everything up?" I asked. "His music, and his career, and everything?"

"He says he's not."

"You asked him that?" I asked.

"Sort of."

"What else did he say, after I left?" I asked.

"Just that he hopes we can get where we understand what he's doin'."

We sat in silence for a while longer, and then Guthrie sighed. "We gotta be gettin' back to the house. Hannah said

it'll be time for supper."

We walked back to the house, while I led Charlie. When we got to the barn, I untacked him, and Guthrie went

to put the saddle away for me. We went into the back door to the kitchen, just as food was being set on the table. Crane was

out somewhere, and Evan and Nancy were on their own for supper, so it was a smaller group than was usual.

Guthrie and I both washed up, and sat in our chairs.

"How was your ride-your walk?" Hannah asked us, and I could tell she was trying to make things seem normal.

"Okay," Guthrie said.

"Fine," I said.

I knew I wasn't imagining that Daniel, and occasionally Jill, too, were looking over at Guthrie and I.

After supper, I helped clear the table, but I wasn't on dish duty. As Clare and Daniel began doing the dishes,

I went on and did my shot. Jill had eaten and made another one of her retreats.

I finished my shot, and took an apple from the bowl, and went thru to the living room. I sat there for a while, beside

Guthrie, and we looked at some of the albums that Nancy had gotten done and put together.

Nobody said anything about Daniel, or what had happened earlier. I was relaxing, just a bit, when he and Clare

finished the dishes, and came into the living room. Clare took a seat beside Brian and Daniel sat down on the other

side of Hannah.

I picked up the photos I'd been looking at, and stood up, saying that I had homework to finish.

Everybody said goodnight, including Daniel, who said, quietly, "Night, squirt."

I said a general goodnight, and avoided looking at Daniel.

7

I tried to throw myself into school the next day. I offered to work on an article for the school newspaper, though I regretted it

afterwards. It was going to take some time to write, since it was on the statistics of high school dropouts.

I drove to the vet office, talking to myself the whole way. I was already busy enough, I shouldn't have volunteered for

such a big article.

There was plenty of work at Ivy's that afternoon. The horses that she was boarding there were already staked out, but

I mucked out the stalls, and refilled the water and feed. Ivy got busy with a couple who came in with their poodle, who had

been attacked by a larger dog.

So, I saddled one of the boarding horses, and took him for an exercise ride, and led one of the others behind, so it could

get some exercise, too.

I rode thru the fields out back of the veterinary building, and then took a road on further, that goes out of town a bit.

The road I chose isn't traveled much, since it leads to a private property on a dead end. I went to the end of the road, and

then turned to ride back. I was coming back a different way, on a more traveled street, and a vehicle pulled from around me, and

up beside me.

A whistle had me looking to the right, at Evan's truck. He was at the wheel, and Daniel was on the passenger side, his window down.

"Hey," Evan said.

"Hey," I answered. I pulled the horse to a halt, and Evan braked his truck.

"These some of the horses that Ivy's boarding?" Evan asked, leaning forward to look out Daniel's window at me.

"Yeah."

There was a momentary silence, and I said, "What are you guys doing?" to make conversation.

Daniel was regarding me with a serious expression. Regretful, I thought.

"Came to get feed," Evan said.

"Oh."

"Gonna work with your horse when you get home?" Evan asked me.

"Yeah, I think so," I said.

"Well, if you manage to get him into the corral, ride him in there," Evan cautioned.

I resisted the urge I had to argue. I didn't want to argue with Evan in front of Daniel.

So, I settled for saying, "Okay." I would argue later about it, I thought.

"I was thinkin' we could go for a ride when you get home," Daniel said to me.

I gave him a look, trying to make my expression as blank as possible. A 'ride' actually meant a 'talk'.

"I've got a lot to do," I said, vaguely. "I don't know if I have time today."

When he gave me that same, regretful look, I added, "I've got a test to study for, and I need to work with D.C."

Daniel wasn't fooled. I knew that. He said, still quietly, "We need to talk, squirt."

"Sometime," I said, breezily, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Avoiding it won't make it go away," Daniel said.

Our eyes met briefly, and I looked away, over the top of the truck. "I need to get back," I said.

Evan was looking uncomfortable, pained, as though he was sorry he was a witness to Daniel's attempt at

conversation with me.

"Bye," I said, pointedly, and urged the horse forward.

Evan said goodbye. I didn't hear Daniel say anything. The truck pulled out, and away, and I headed back to the

vet office.

7

When I got home, I went inside to talk to Hannah, and let her know I was home. I went out to try and coax D.C. into

the corral. I managed, surprisingly, to get him into the corral, and I rewarded him with a second apple. I decided to forego

saddling him. I put on a bridle, and called Guthrie over, as he was passing by.

"Give me a foot up, will you?" I asked him.

"Why don't you saddle him?" Guthrie asked, ducking under the corral gate to come over to me.

"I'm gonna try it this way, today," I said. "Come on."

Guthrie obligingly cupped his hands, and helped hoist me up onto D.C.'s back. I rode him around the corral for a bit, cantering, and

walking.

"He's doin' good," Guthrie said, from the spot where he'd been watching.

"Yeah. Better. At least I got him in here by myself today, without Evan's help."

When I was finished, and was beginning to curry D.C. I told Guthrie about seeing Daniel and Evan earlier, and how

Daniel had said he wanted to talk to me.

"You might as well," Guthrie advised. "Just hear him out, and get it over with."

"You've changed your tune," I told him.

Guthrie shrugged. "Not really. I still think he's crazy, but he's in the right about one thing. It's not for us to understand

everything about it. Just support him."

"It's not even about that," I said. "I mean, it is, but it's also about him not telling us."

"He said he was going to."

"When?" I demanded.

Guthrie lifted his hands. "I don't know, Har. That's what he said. Besides, there's nothin' we can do about it, anyway."

"Yeah, but it says something about our relationship," I tried to explain. "He could have told us when he said he was

going to marry her, and that she was going to have a baby. He could have said right then that Jill was pregnant when they met,

and he was going to take care of the baby anyway."

"He could have," Guthrie agreed. "But, he didn't."

"Exactly," I said.

"Man, you're stubborn," Guthrie accused.

"It wasn't right of him," I maintained.

"I understand how ya feel," Guthrie said. "I mean, with you and Daniel always bein' so tight and all." He regarded me

with sympathy. "I'm sorry, Har. I know you're hurt about it."

I felt emotional at Guthrie's sympathy. I gave him a grateful glance.

"Thanks, Guth," I said.

"Maybe you would feel better, if you talked to Daniel, I mean."

"I'd just say something that I shouldn't," I said.

We were interrupted by the call to supper. I went to put my bridle and the currycomb away, telling Guthrie to relay

that I would be in in a few minutes. I wanted to finish my chores first. Time had gotten away from me. I fed the goats, and

went to check on the water and food for the stray pup, who was still staked out in the orchard. I noticed that the rope I'd had tied

to his collar had been replaced by a much longer, much nicer lead.

I stopped at the back door, long enough to crouch down and give Clarence a belly rub.

When I went into the kitchen, everybody was already seated at the table, passing the food. I went to wash up at the

sink, and then went to sit at my spot at the table.

Hannah was asking me about my day, and what I'd done at the vet office. I told her about exercising the horses Ivy

was boarding, and ate my meal of roast with potatoes and carrots.

"How's Kristin?" Crane asked, looking across the table at Guthrie and I.

"I didn't get to really talk to her today," I said.

"She's okay," Guthrie said. "Her mom told Frank to stay away last night so they could talk."

"That's good," Hannah said.

Guthrie shrugged. "One night isn't anything. Her mom will just let him come right back, anyhow."

"She could be emancipated," Jill suggested.

"Is that where she'd be a total legal adult?" Guthrie asked, looking at Jill in interest.

When Jill nodded, and said, 'Yes', Crane spoke up.

"That's not it, exactly," he said. "She'd be responsible for herself, yeah, but she still can't vote, or drink, or quit school."

Guthrie and I exchanged a look and I knew we were both thinking of the fact that Kristin was considering quitting school.

"A parent can sign a teenager out of school, though, right, Crane?" I asked.

"Yeah, they can," Crane said. "Kristin's not thinking of that, is she?" he asked, his forehead wrinkled in disapproval.

I didn't want to rat Kristin out to Crane, since he was the one that she particularly didn't want to know about it. And, besides,

it wasn't as though it was definite.

I settled for saying, "She doesn't know what's best sometimes."

"Well, what's best isn't that," Crane said. "That's for sure."

I winced a little, hearing the censure in his tone. Even though it wasn't me, I could feel his disapproval. I thought how

formidable he would be, if it were me, suggesting such a thing.

"I think Linda would benefit from a support group, of other women who've been thru what she's going through," Hannah

said. "I wonder if there's anything like that around here."

"There must be," Clare said.

"I should call around and find one for her," Hannah said.

"That's Linda's business," Adam said.

Hannah gave Adam a look. "I'm just saying that it could help her. Some counseling-a support group. Some friendship

and support."

"Friendship and support are good," Adam said. "But, it's up to Linda to decide when and if she wants to go to a counselor or

group."

The air was crackling between them. It wasn't an argument, at least not yet. I knew Hannah wouldn't argue, full-out, in

front of everybody.

"My sister took a long time to decide to look for help," Clare said. "Two years of her husband berating her, and then hitting

her, before she decided to leave him and get help."

Jill made a sound from across the table, sort of a cough and gasp all together. When everybody looked her way,

she said, "Excuse me," in a weird voice, and stood up, leaving the kitchen quickly, and going towards the living room.

Daniel's gaze followed her, and then he stood up, too, and followed.

7