Chapter FIVE!
There was no time for my thoughts to process my feet had lead the way as I burst into the bedroom.
"Harry, please I'm sorry" I whispered, not wanting to look at his frame that was sat on the edge of the bed his back to me. There was an awkward silence that hung in the air; I wanted it to break any minute.
"Harry? Please" I whispered again, I knew he could hear me, I stood in the doorway waiting for his beautiful face to turn around and grin at me but when he did turn to face me the smile was non-existent, instead the shape of his mouth was turned into a line and his perfect green eyes were cloudy and distant.
My hands created knots as I anxiously waited for him to speak, my voice inaudible but maybe that was because I knew there was nothing I could do or say. Tears gathered in my eyes threatening to fall.
"I know things have been hard for you lately but I didn't know that it would be such a crime for me to spend Valentines Day with my girlfriend" he sighed, his gaze transfixed on the bedspread. My heart beat furiously, the threatening tear sliding down my cheek as I realised the consequence of my selfishness, causing pain to the one person who I never wanted to feel pain especially pain that I had caused.
"I'm sorry" was all that I could choke out, it was pathetic but that's who I am: pathetic. His eyes finally met mine as another tear glided over my cheek bone. He was hurt and it was entirely fault. My eyelids closed trying to block the scene out in front of me, wanting it to go away.
A hand snaked around my waist and another hand pulled me into something hard that was covered by a thin piece of soft material. At first I instantly thought that it had been a dream but my theory appeared to be untrue when I opened my eyes to find myself in the same room but in the arms of the boy I loved, it was a drastic change but I felt relieved as my rigid frame relaxed into his embrace. The jigsaw pieces of our bodies fitting perfectly as his t-shirt became dampened from my sobs.
No words were spoken they weren't needed only a few shushes that were whispered from above my head could be heard over the sobs that had found their way out of my system. I wasn't crying for the same reason anymore, I was crying about everything. Inviting feelings surrounded me as forgiveness settled in and I knew that everything was back to normal but these feeling didn't stop the tears that carried on falling.
It sounds selfish that I am stood in the arms of this outstanding being and im crying about my life when people are far off worse than me, they have nothing, where as I have a house, a boyfriend, friends and a good financial situation but is all this enough for me to make me feel like my life is complete? No, even though I have everything I could have ever dreamed of, this is out shone by the pain that I carry everyday and it's becoming too heavy. The shattered remains of my insides will never be mended, I'll be forever broken and no one wants the discards of someone's left over's because that's all I really am, I'm someone else's leftovers…Connors leftovers.
Heey guys! Hope you enjoyed this chapter? sorry its really short:/ I will be posting another tonight to make up for my lack of chapters this week and for the shortness of this one, I am so rubbish haha, but I've had another super busy week. That's no excuse though. Please REVIEW! and favourite me, etc. Thank-you for all the support and for being patient with me, it means a lot just keep reviewing!:D xoxo
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