I arrived in Forks on a Sunday afternoon. My dad was still at church, and Mom was putting together a meal for the parish members that had been invited over to share Sunday dinner. This was a regular occurrence while I was growing up and it shouldn't have ruffled me, but I was out of practice with socializing as the pastor's daughter. I began feeling claustrophobic rather quickly. When Mom said she was out of a few things and needed to run to the store, I quickly volunteered to make the trip.
On my way out of the market, I scoured the bulletin board on the long shot that there would be a roommate wanted sign. I knew my parents were glad to have me home, but I was anxious to be on my own. I was fond of my independence and was already missing the quiet solitude of my old apartment. Not to mention, if I ever wanted to get laid again, it wouldn't happen while living at my parents' house.
However, the board only had an ad for free fire wood and a lost dog. No luck. Not a surprise in a town this small. I took the index card I'd prepared and stole a pushpin from the board to put mine up.
Room needed, female roommate preferred. No weirdos.
At the last minute I decided not to be picky and crossed out the no weirdos requirement. I'd take a little weird if it meant not displacing one of my brothers from their room or sleeping on the couch indefinitely.
I turned toward the door to head for my car when I saw her. She was standing stock still, but I could see her hand trembling. It was raised like she was reaching for something, but there was nothing in front of her except me. Her eyes were locked on mine; an expression of anger, confusion, and something I didn't have words for on her beautiful face. I was overcome by a sense of awe, the likes of which I'd only ever known once before. It was the same feeling that had once launched an obsession.
It was misty that spring morning, and there was a chill in the air. I was alone. I'd turned back a short time into our hike to grab a sweater from the car. I walked quickly to catch up with the group, and to Ben, who I knew was waiting ahead on the trail. I was lost in the rhythm of my boots against the ground. They sounded like thunder in the otherwise silent forest as my body cut through the damp air. I began to feel uncomfortable, the minimum visibility making me claustrophobic, the quiet seeming almost unnaturally so. I picked up my pace, trying to push through my nerves and the irrational feeling that I was being watched from somewhere in the grey fog.
I heard the muffled snap of a twig from the trees to my left followed by a bird call that sounded remarkably like a woman's laugh from the same direction. I froze before turning toward the source of the sound, my eyes seeking out its source without success. I strained my ears, but the noise did not repeat.
My back began to warm, as if the sun had broken through the clouds sending a deep heat I felt in my bones. I calmed considerably with the sensation, instinctively relaxing a bit. I blew out the breath which had caught in my lungs and tried to calm down.
When I turned back to head up the trail, I found the source of warmth in the form of a tremendous animal only a couple of feet away blocking my path. I'd never seen a wolf in the wild, but I knew they weren't supposed to be this big. I'd seen Draft horses smaller than this. I had to crane my neck to see its head from where I stood and was surprised that it didn't seem to notice me there. Instead it was focused on the area to my left, where I'd heard the rustling and trills. The wolf's posture was rigid, the animal's thick, shiny, black fur stood on end. A vicious snarl revealed sharp teeth, and it occurred to me that I should be more frightened than I was.
Instead I was simply awed. It did not escape me that I was witnessing something extraordinary. The wolf started to move, a slow stalking pace off into the trees. It cast a glance over in my direction, and the soulful look in its eyes took my breath away. I felt protected, important, exhilarated.
Like a flash of lightning, it disappeared into the trees. The thrall broken, I turned and I ran up the trail as fast as I could.
I couldn't outrun what I'd seen, what I'd felt. It was a moment that had changed me. I'd never been the same.
A glance shouldn't have such significance, but standing in front of this beautiful woman, I felt completely bare; like there was something happening that was bigger than I was. She was clearly too beautiful to be real. Artemis fallen to earth. Her body was powerfully feminine, the perfect balance of muscle and soft curves on her tall frame. Her tremors had shaken loose a lock of short, black hair from behind her ear and it fell across the edge of her eye. She looked dangerous, but I was eager with anticipation. Despite her silence and rigid posture, I felt drawn to her. I wanted to know her well enough to ask what she saw when she looked at me. The pull toward this stranger was unreal.
I tried to muster a friendly smile despite how nervous I felt under her gaze. Approaching girls was always awkward anyway. Barring meeting at a gay pride parade, it was hard to tell whether they would be receptive to a relationship of a more intimate nature. It seemed like by the time I realized I was falling for a girl, she'd tell me about the guy she was crushing on. Not wanting to face the disappointment of making an emotional connection when the physical wasn't an option, I had spent the past couple years having more casual hookups, and hadn't felt a real intensity with anyone.
This, however, was intense.
I wanted to know this girl. Somehow, just looking at her, I knew I would accept whatever she offered, just to keep feeling the way I did when she looked at me. I took a deep breath and said the only word my stunned mind could summon.
"Hi."
She didn't respond, but at least the shaking stopped. She blinked twice and blew out a long, slow breath through her rose petal lips, turned, and ran out the door.
I felt like the chance of a lifetime had just slipped through my fingers, and though I tried to brush it off, that quiet ache stayed with me for days.