This was meant to be the deciding part, but John had already made his decision, and so he was just trying to think of the least stupid question he could ask on national TV. Sadly, no ideas were coming to him, so he decided to just run with it.
"Okay… Being in the army, you form close bonds with everyone, you make really good friends in high pressure situations like that… So how would you make me be your friend?"
Sarah had to answer first. "Well, I'd be myself, and hopefully you'd like me for that." The crowd gave a half-hearted cheer at the half-hearted attempt.
"Ooh, you got a good one there John!" Paddy said, nudging John lightly in his good shoulder.
And then it was Sherlock's turn. Sherlock paused, running through acceptable-on-TV versions of responses. He couldn't give too many off his John-deductions away. "I'd find out all your favourite things and then turn up at your house with them. And I'd watch football-no, rugby with you."
John nodded unconsciously. "Okay John, you've got to make your decision, but before you do there's one thing you should know: one of these two often stays awake for days on end."
John didn't even have to think about it. He walked right straight over to Sherlock.
"I'm not gay." John pecked him on the cheek, and then walked round to Sarah.
Then he turned off her light.
"Congratulations! Sherlock has managed to get a date on his first show! John and Sherlock are now going to be off to…"
The audience chimed in to finish "The isle of Fernando!"
Sherlock and John waved goodbye and walked off out, hand in hand.
The camera panned over, showing them going down the stairs.
"Your deductions are fantastic by the way."
"That's not what people normally say."
John chuckled "What do they normally say then?"
"Piss off."
Apologies for how short it is, but the next one will be longer, much longer, I promise you.
Yay, John picked Sherlock! Of course he would. Their lobe is 5eva.
It's 1am. You may get the next chapter today. Laterz.