As usual, this chapter took a lot more work than I had planned. Damned plot bunnies.
Darkness and pain.
It felt as if someone had hit him in the chest with a baseball bat. It was hard to breathe and so dark. So very dark.
He was alone, and that sent chills of fear down his spine. The last time he had been alone, bad things had happened to him. He had been hurt so bad, and there had been no way to protect himself.
Where was the one who had rescued him? Where was the one who had banished the solitude with eyes that glittered with danger and interest?
He had felt like a jewel under that gaze. Precious. Valuable.
Around him the darkness swirled and shifted, until at last it decided on a form and took on the image of a forest glen, darkened by the onset of night. The false sky seemed to stretch up and away from him forever, the stars high and distant. He was alone.
Or so he thought.
His ears twitched as he heard the sound of feet disturbing the underbrush, and a moment later he picked up the scent of human. He knew he had no real physical form in this place, but somehow he managed to turn. His nonexistent mouth watered at the thought of human flesh.
The form hovering by the trees was small and frightened – vulnerable in a way the youko could and would never allow himself to be. That vulnerability made the form beautiful, desirable. Compelling.
"You're here, too." Shuichi said quietly.
The youko lifted his lip in a snarl.
"Think to put me back to sleep?" he demanded. "To lock me away until you need me?"
The human crossed his arms and gave a small shudder.
"I don't think that's an option anymore."
"Where did you go?" the youko challenged, remembering belatedly that the human had been gone for a while. He had never left before – what if he returned with some new weapon to chain the fox with?
The human shook his head, a phantom wind picking up strands of red hair that didn't really exist in this place.
"I'm not entirely sure. A prison. It has, however, broken…or so it would seem."
The youko crossed his arms, baring his teeth. "Leave. I don't want you back. I don't need your weakness."
"The things which make us different do not make either of us weak." Shuichi told him with a wry smile.
"Why am I here?" he demanded. "It hurts."
"My return was too quick." Shuichi closed his eyes, seeking something beyond their surroundings. "Our body is in shock. It's dying."
"Dying?"
"Poor Yusuke."
"Yusuke?"
"He will blame himself."
The healer felt her heart break as she looked down at the boy sitting in the waiting room chair, red-rimmed eyes locked on a door through which he was not allowed entrance. Fine tremors shook his entire body, his skin pale and sallow.
"Urameshi?" she asked gently. He jumped as she placed a hand on his shoulder, but did not look away from the door. "Perhaps you should rest."
"No." he rasped.
The door opened and the healer she had come to replace walked through. He met her eyes and shook his head slightly, motioning for her to come to him. With a glance at the spirit detective, he drew her slightly further down the hall.
"There's been no change."
"None at all? But it's been days."
"We'll give it a few more days, but…it doesn't look like he's going to make it. There's nothing more we can do for him."
"No." the boy protested, rising to his feet. The healer gave a start, scolding herself for not realizing how far his hearing would reach with those cat ears. "You can't give up on him!"
"I'm sorry, son." The other healer shook his head as he pulled her into the room.
The door closed on the boy's anguished cry.
To say Hiei had been furious at the accusation that he had murdered Yusuke Urameshi would be to imply a set of emotions much more gentle than his actual response.
Had Hiei not been warded at the time, he probably would have ended up killing every last living thing around him. As it was, they managed to subdue him for long enough to cage him, adding enough extra wards that, in the end, Hiei would do nothing more than sit quietly in his glowing cage and contemplate his eventual rampage.
He had enough room to sit or stand in his prison as long as he remained the in very center of the enclosure. He couldn't even speak, because one overanxious guard had shoved a silencing talisman into his mouth that first, furious day, and the damage had not yet entirely healed.
So Hiei sat in his confinement with his eyes closed to keep himself from glaring, waiting for the day his captors grew complacent enough to leave themselves open to attack. Hiei would slaughter everyone in Spirit World the day he escaped, or die trying. If any harm had come to his lovers, he would attack the Human realm, too.
And even then his rage may not be fully sated.
The waiting game took patience – something Hiei did not consider himself proficient at. To distract himself, and to keep him focused, he delved into the past, examining his memories.
It almost worked.
The years before he had met his fox were dark memories in his mind. Even in the demon world he was accustomed to people perceiving him as monstrous – he looked too young for his bloodthirsty actions. He was too dark, too dangerous, too unstable.
Even in Demon World, where no one could be trusted and the most beautiful were always the most dangerous, he was considered a nightmare. Demons did have a few basic rules of conduct, and for breaking these rules, Hiei had forever set himself apart as a legend – and a criminal.
He should never have survived his childhood – but he had. Seeing a five-year-old with the cold and merciless eyes of someone willing to do anything to survive was truly a horrible thing. There had been blood on his hands before he had lived a decade.
At first those who had raised him had found it amusing. The corruption of a young child was the demonic dream.
But eventually they had begun to fear him.
He had still been traveling with them, though, when he had first met Kurama in Dai'shaal. In fact, they had been the ones to pay for the fox's time for him.
Kurama was older than Hiei, but at that time he was still considered very young by demonic standards.
Hiei had been utterly fascinated by him – another child trapped in corruption by circumstance. He, too, was an outcast from his home, shunned by those responsible for teaching him.
And worse, in Kurama's case, was that the fox had even less of a choice in his actions than Hiei. An adolescent youko far from the influence of his own kind? A powerful adolescent youko?
What else was there for him but prostitution? It would be years until he earned the power and reputation he would need for independence.
Much as Kurama hated it, there was no escape for him because his body – his power – needed the regular sexual activity, just as it needed food and rest.
Hiei had not slept with Kurama the night they met. In fact, their physical relationship had not begun until after Hiei had taken the fox away from Dai'shaal.
They had talked, nothing more. All night. For those few short hours Hiei had felt like something more than a weapon, or a feral animal struggling for survival.
The darkness that penetrated his memories did not exist in those which involved the fox. The years that they had traveled together were cherished to Hiei – even when there was danger, or when he feared losing the fox's favor to another lover, or when they fought each other (their shared passion lending itself to harsh words and, once or twice, even violence just as easily as it could to sex. That is, until they learned the merits and mutual benefits of angry sex. That, however, was another story.)
Then Kurama had died.
Hiei had not been there when it had happened.
He and Kurama had had one of their rare, explosive fights, and had separated. Hiei hadn't seen his lover for nearly two months when he felt him die.
There was an area of the Demon plane that still bore the scars of his rampage; his fury had been unstoppable.
His rage had been even worse when he hadn't been able to find his beloved's body. To this day, he still wasn't sure what had happened to it, though he was fairly certain Spirit World had done something with it.
Those years were the darkest of his life. In truth, he didn't remember much from them. Only two things had motivated him during this time – survival, and the search for Yukina.
Hiei heard the door to his cell open, but didn't move – even to open his eyes. A guard checking on him or bringing him food – it didn't matter which. They would think him broken, and one day they would make a mistake and come too close to him.
How long had he been there?
Hiei dismissed the thought, content to fix his mind on the past and fuel his rage with his memories.
Never in his wildest dreams would Hiei have allowed himself the luxury of even thinking he would ever see his beloved fox again. When he had slipped into the human world searching for a demon who may or may not have harmed his sister, Kurama had been the last thing on his mind. It certainly hadn't occurred to him that the human boy he met who radiated demonic aura could have been his Kurama.
Then the boy had given him his name.
At that time, Kurama had not yet opened himself to the full extent to his demonic powers – a youko's sex drive inside an adolescent human boy? It was a risk the red haired boy was unwilling to take.
But because he had not opened himself to his powers, he had not recognized Hiei on sight. He had known him once he had been told his name, of course, but had not informed Hiei of his own identity because he had not thought Hiei would be able to accept his new human form.
But Hiei had accepted it, and he loved it as much as he loved the fox form.
And finally he had had his fox to himself.
Which is what made it so strange, Hiei reflected, that he had been attracted from Yusuke from the very first.
Whoever had entered the room spoke, and Hiei ignored them, fully immersed within his own mind. On the backs of his eyelids his memories played like a movie – it was almost as if he again stood in that dark forest clearing where he had first laid eyes on the spirit detective.
Of course, he had not been in his correct mind at the time. That damned sword had done something to him – twisted both his mind and his powers. Hiei didn't like to think about it.
But nevertheless, it stuck out in his mind – one of his brightest memories. A human, brash and foolish, daring to stand up against him. Daring to challenge him and his companions for their rightfully stolen gain.
There were demons that quaked at the very sound of his name, and this nothing human was going to challenge him? It had impressed him, if nothing else. He would always hold that image in his mind – that first sight of Yusuke, so bold and confident.
And Yusuke had beaten him.
The incident was far enough into the past now that Hiei could admit at least to himself that he had needed to be stopped. The sword had blinded him to everything, even his love for Kurama. If Yusuke had not stopped him, he would have done something truly regrettable – he now had no doubt about that.
He knew that Yusuke had been all that kept him from drowning in his worry and rage and sorrow when Kurama had first gone missing. Without Yusuke there to ground him, he would have become so lost in his fury that he would never have gotten his fox back.
Hiei had nearly entirely slipped back within the surface of his memories when he felt the wards that surrounded him suddenly drop.
His mind snapped quickly back to reality, back to the pain of knowing he had been wrenched away from all his hopes. Hiei grew even more still, slowing his breath as he tentatively reached out with his senses.
He felt it when the intruder knelt before him, felt the disturbance in the air as a hand reached out for him.
Eyes shooting open, he darted his hand out to catch hold of the offender's wrist before he could be touched and he gave a start, rage melting away and leaving him empty as he found himself staring into a pair of amused, honey-brown eyes.
"Hiya, hot stuff." Yusuke greeted.
"Kitten," he greeted slowly, wondering if he had slipped into madness already. Surely this was impossible – accused murderers weren't aloud to have visitors, after all. Especially not if said visitor was the one he had supposedly murdered. "Have you come to help me destroy Spirit World?"
Another grin, and a little more light entered Hiei's mind.
"I was thinking more along the lines of I've come to take you home." Yusuke answered.
"Home?"
"Trial's over, lover," he grinned. "We'll talk about it later – but first I need my wrist back."
"Where's Kurama?"
"Get up. Let's go."
When Hiei did nothing but stare at him, Yusuke stood, and used the smaller demon's hold on his wrist to force him to his feet as well. Hiei felt a moment of surprise as Yusuke pulled him into a hug – the dark haired boy had always been extremely strong, but it seemed his new transformation had only increased that strength. How had he missed noticing that sooner?
"How long has it been?" he asked, finding it impossible to struggle out of the feline's embrace.
"Almost two months." Yusuke whispered back.
"Where's Kurama?"
Yusuke released him and clasped his hand. Hiei had never, ever ever ever liked holding hands – particularly in public – but he found it impossible to free himself. He had no choice but to follow as Yusuke led him past the guards and right out of his cell.
"Koenma sent Botan to find those creepy snakes who killed me. It took her a while because their souls had grown so weak after they failed to eat us, but she finally managed it and brought them back." Yusuke told him as they walked down the long corridor past other high-security cells. "There was a little incident and uh…they found out that the captain of the guys that arrested us had stolen stuff from us, so Koenma's dad decided to stop ignoring him."
"What does this have to do with anything?" he growled.
Yusuke squeezed his hand, and it almost hurt.
"Just shut up and listen."
Hiei lifted his lip in a silent snarl, but he really didn't want to fight with his kitten. He just wanted to know where the third member of their party was.
"Koenma managed to get the snake people to admit that what happened to me was their fault – though they don't know why I changed either, by the way – "
"Yusuke."
"I'm getting to it – hold your horses, will you?"
He gave a quiet growl, and Yusuke laughed. It would have made Hiei feel better to hear him laugh had there not been something subdued in that noise.
"Anyway," Yusuke's voice was quieter now. He paused for a guard to open the door for them, and led Hiei through with a small frown. "With their testimony, there was no more reason for them to hold you. So this morning Koenma got you pardoned for killing me and sent me to come get you and now we can go home."
Hiei managed at last to wench his hand away, and Yusuke blinked at him in surprise. Had he not realized how hard he was holding him?
"Where's the fox?" he demanded.
Yusuke's eyes darkened and Hiei felt the first stirrings of dread.
"Detective?"
"Let's just get out of here, okay?" he asked, pushing open another door and walking into the lobby. Hiei followed, furious.
"Don't avoid the question, kitten," he spat. "Where the hell is the fox?"
"Where indeed?"
Hiei jumped, spinning around.
Benches lay lined against the wall near the door from which they had just emerged. As Hiei turned around, a lone figure rose from one of those benches, a soft smile spreading across his pretty features, emerald eyes alight with mischief.
"Is there a problem, my dears?" Kurama asked, tossing long strands of red hair over his shoulder.
It sounded so much easier than it had actually been.
When the sphere holding Kurama's humanity had broken and the fox had fallen, pandemonium had erupted. Healers had been sent for, and Kurama had been rushed off to the medical bay.
Having nowhere else to go, his humanity had fled back into Kurama's body; however, the problem was that it had come rushing back much too quickly, sending his body into shock.
Yusuke had had no choice but to sit back and watch helplessly as the healers fought to save his lover. They had fought hard to contain his power and keep it from lashing out, to keep his soul from fleeing the strange things going on within his body.
They had done all they could and after a sleepless three days had pronounced him as stable. There was nothing more anyone could do – whether he lived or died was entirely up to Kurama.
Kurama wouldn't talk much about what had happened. He said that his human side and his demon side had met within him and fought and come to a drawl. He said that they had at last come to an agreement and chosen to fuse together.
Yusuke didn't know how much sense that made to him, and whether or not he would ever understand it. He did know, however, that Kurama was different now. Neither strictly the youko nor Shuichi, he was now more himself than he had ever been.
As Kurama had said, "the issue has been solved."
Kurama seemed at peace with the change, and happy with the fact that there was no longer a division within him between his two natures. He could switch forms at will now, and gently chided Yusuke for fussing over him.
He didn't seem to care that he had been unconscious for a week and a half, though he was touched that Yusuke had sat at his side sleeplessly.
Still, Yusuke couldn't bring himself to be as happy about what had happened as Kurama was. He had been terrified the entire time, sick with guilt and worry. The day he had noticed Kurama's hair turning red, he had been caught somewhere between hope and panic. Even now he couldn't quite bring himself to believe that everything was finally going to be all right – that the problems were all gone and they could go home at last. It didn't feel real. After all, in Yusuke's experience, nothing good ever happened without a price.
Kurama explained what had happened to Hiei, and the smaller demon seemed to feel the same wariness as Yusuke did.
Until Kurama smiled.
For some reason, Hiei saw something there that he could trust without question, and the darkness had vanished from his eyes.
"Yusuke?"
The dark haired boy gave a start, a part of his mind belatedly telling him that they had been trying to get his attention to get his attention for several minutes.
"My dear?" Kurama asked, placing a hand on his knee. "We're home."
Yusuke glanced out the car window, then back at Kurama. Hiei leaned over from the back seat, squinting at him.
"You shouldn't make that face, kitten." He chided.
Yusuke blinked, staring back at both of his lovers. They were all alive and free. Surely it wouldn't hurt, just this once, for him to relax and accept something good when it came to him. Couldn't he let himself be happy once?
Yusuke grinned.
"What are we waiting for then?"
To Be Continued
I know I always say this, but I'm really not very happy with this chapter. There was nothing else I could think of to do though. I've rewritten it three times; I'm at my limit. Anyway, I hope it's okay, and I hope it makes sense. It's probably too quick. Damn.
Response to Unsigned Reviews:
Abi - (cue dramatic music)
BballAnimeLover89 - Um, Hiei cried for Yusuke when he thought he had died. Yusuke saved the tear gems to remind himself that Hiei loves him. When they were arrested, the Captain stole the gems from their bag.
kit-kit - neither do I!