Thanks as always to the awesomeness of beta Suilven and how she cleans up my messes!

His lips were soft and pliant against hers, his tongue gently—yet hesitantly—seeking and exploring her mouth. His fingers moved softly through her hair, the pull matching the growing heat inside her. As they kissed, Lhiannon felt the light brush of Anders' hand against her breast, his touch curious as his fingers moved over the sensitive nipple. Lhiannon arched her back slightly, pushing her breast more firmly into Anders hand…

… and then her eyes flew open.

Her eyes were drawn to Anders' face, so close to hers that she could feel them cross as they moved over his skin. The heat in her body quickly quelled as their kiss suddenly felt… wrong somehow.

Anders was her friend; the very first friend she had made when she entered Kinloch Hold only a few months before. She had watched him woo other girls—and the occasional boy—in the tower and had even given him her opinions of those people when he had asked for them… and sometimes when he did not. He had been her confidant when she had originally felt awkward around the other apprentices. He had often helped her with her studies, even spending time with her when it had become clear she was struggling with her healing spells. He always made her laugh when she was feeling down and she had found in him a closeness she had only experienced with her brother as they had grown up in Greenwood Vale. In that moment, she realized that Anders had actually become closer to her than Edwin ever had.

She could not do this. It felt wrong, even with the buzzing of the brandy still roaring through her head. Its influence was strong, but not strong enough.

Moving her hands up to Anders' shoulders, Lhiannon gently pushed him back, breaking their kiss. Anders paused, a look of confusion crossing his features. His light brows knit together and his head tilted slightly as he studied Lhiannon's face. "Lhi? What's wrong?"

"I… I can't do this."

"Sure you can," Anders said, leaning forward to nuzzle her hair. Lhiannon closed her eyes, fighting the growing heat inside her once again. The buzzing of the brandy thundered in her head, pushing and nudging her to continue, to satisfy the desire and need building in her one more. She turned her face slightly toward him, almost instinctually, before she pulled away from Anders again.

"No, Andy. I can't. It just… doesn't feel right."

With a sigh, Anders pulled back and studied Lhiannon for several moments. She felt as if his eyes were boring into her, searching for a reason why she had stopped him from continuing despite both of them clearly wanting to continue.

"Why, Lhi?" Anders asked more sharply than he intended. He saw Lhiannon flinch slightly and immediately began to stammer as he ran a hand through his hair. "I… I mean, why doesn't it feel right? It felt right to me and I'm pretty sure it felt right to you."

Lhiannon pinched the bridge of her nose, squeezing her eyes shut against the hot tears that suddenly flooded them. She felt so confused; in a way, she loved Anders, but that love felt similar to the love she had for Tallia, Rigana, and Vivian. Granted, her body responded to Anders' kiss and touch, but she knew that was a normal response exacerbated by the alcohol. While her body craved the touch, her mind was too strong. When she asked herself if she truly loved Anders, the small voice inside her whispered 'not that way.'

"What if we pursued this, Andy? What if we decided to take our friendship further? What would we do if something were to happen between us? I couldn't bear to lose you as my friend." Lhiannon swiped at a tear as it rolled from the corner of her eye. "You were the first friend I had when I arrived. Remember how I hid you from the templars?"

Anders chuckled softly. "I remember you practically shoving me into that dusty trunk at the end of your bed. I sneezed for hours after that."

Holding out her hands in supplication, Lhiannon continued. "You're my best friend. I can't let anything happen to that. Falling in love is just... too risky."

Silence fell between them as Anders shifted to sit next to Lhiannon, his back against the outcropping of rocks behind them. The waters of Lake Calenhad gently lapped against the stones nearby. The plaintive cry of a gull soaring overhead drew Lhiannon's attention upward. She watched the gull soar on the air currents until it disappeared from her sight. Sighing softly, she closed her eyes. Had she already damaged their friendship beyond repair by stopping him?

"Dammit. You're right."

Lhiannon turned to look at Anders He was massaging his temple and grimacing slightly as if he were fighting off a headache. "I am?"

"Against my better judgment and reputation amongst the apprentices in the tower, yes." Anders turned to face Lhiannon directly. "I want you, but I don't want to force you to do anything you don't feel is right. I, too, value our friendship too much to do that. Even if you did give me blue balls."

Lhiannon grinned sheepishly. "Sorry about that."

As she finished speaking, Lhiannon saw a small grin pull on the corner of his mouth. "You… won't tell the other apprentices about this… will you?"

"Preserving your reputation?"

"Always." Anders stood, holding out a hand to Lhiannon and helping her to her feet. He reached down and picked up the empty Antivan brandy bottle. With a grin, he led Lhiannon to the shore of Lake Calenhad, where he flung the bottle far out into the lake. It bobbed on the surface for a moment, catching the rays of the sun before sinking beneath the surface.

A year had passed since the events surrounding the liberation of Kinloch Hold from the late First Enchanter Remille's usurping. Most of the scars of that day had been erased; most, Lhiannon thought to herself as the somber anniversary ceremony continued. But not all. A call had gone out to the other Circles in Thedas, asking for enchanters to come to Kinloch Hold to replace those instructors and mentors that had been lost. After several weeks of a diminished population, mages had begun to arrive over the subsequent months, boosting the population and morale of the mages once more. While the tangible scars on the building itself were all but gone, the physical—and mental—scars remained on the mages themselves. At any rate, the Circle and Chantry hoped that this ceremony would finally be the closing of that horrific chapter of the recent past.

Much had changed in the last year. Lhiannon was still meeting with her mentor, Enchanter Sari, to improve her healing spells and work on mixing and combining reagents to make potions and poultices. While her healing spells were still troubling her, she was making slow progress. "You may never be the best healer," Sari had told her, "so I'll teach you to create potions and poultices as well. It will be helpful. We already know your gifts are in the primal realm, but you should still know basic healing." They met with the First Enchanter on a regular basis to discuss her progress, as was normal for apprentices assigned to senior mages.

Rigana was quickly moving toward her Harrowing, which she was certain would be happening within the next few months. Even the senior mages were in agreement that she should be put to the test soon. Lhiannon was both happy for her friend and slightly envious. Rigana's mentor had already told her that they would be traveling to one of the northern arlings once her Harrowing was complete, so she was excited to undertake this new adventure. Lhiannon knew her Harrowing was still some time off because of the age at which her abilities had manifested. Still, she would not be the oldest mage to face the Harrowing, so that gave her a degree of comfort.

Lhiannon was glad that Tallia would still be at the Tower after Rigana had left with her mentor. The young elf was still at least a year away from her Harrowing. First Enchanter Irving was looking for a mentor for her, but had not found a suitable one just yet. The prejudices against elves still remained among some of the human mages, so finding either an amenable human mage or a suitable elven mage was still a work in process. Tallia was understandably impatient for a mentor, but rarely complained beyond how ignorant some of the shemlens could be. She continued her diligent studies, knowing that her time would come soon.

Jowan was with many of the younger students, taking the necessary beginner's classes and learning about the history and laws of magic. The laws of magic fascinated him; he wanted to understand the relationship between mana and the Fade and sought to learn about magic of all types. He was showing a curiosity about the ancient magic used by the Tevinter magisters and scoured the libraries on his free time to learn all he could. Whenever Lhiannon visited him in his dormitory, he always had his nose in a book. If nothing else, his vocabulary was expanding by leaps and bounds.

Lhiannon sighed quietly when her gaze fell to Anders beside her. He still had not faced his Harrowing and was becoming increasingly angry about the situation. He often questioned the senior mages and even the First Enchanter himself, seeking to understand why he had not been selected for his Harrowing. "The senior mages are holding me back!" he had complained more than once to Lhiannon. "I don't know if it's because they are jealous of my abilities or are punishing me for something. I just want to take my Harrowing so I can leave this place!"

"I'm sure the mages will let you know when you're ready, Andy. You just have to be patient."

"Fuck patience, Lhi! I'm tired of waiting! They had better put me through my Harrowing soon… or else!"

Lhiannon had felt her brow lower at Anders' vague threat. "Or else what?"

"Or else… oh, I don't know… just or else!"

It was not long after that conversation that Lhiannon discovered what 'or else' meant.

"Apprentice Amell! Get up!"

Lhiannon felt herself being pulled from the washed out landscape of the Fade and back into the real world, the jarring effect causing her head to both pound and spin with maddening vertigo. After a moment, she realized that there was an ironclad grip on the upper part of her arm, pulling her into an upright position before her tired brain could catch up. She opened bleary eyes and squinted at the bright light of several lanterns held just before her. The pounding in her head increased at the stabbing light.

"Get up, Apprentice."

The blankets were ripped away from her, exposing her to the sudden chill of the room. She yelped in surprise. Looking about, Lhiannon saw the angry expressions of several templars gathered in a half circle at the side of her bed. Beyond them, Lhiannon saw Tallia curled up on her bed, her knees to her chest as she looked on with wide eyed horror. Her eyes moved from Lhiannon to the templars and back again.

"What's happening?" Lhiannon asked, her mouth feeling as if it were full of cotton. She reached for the small cup and carafe of water at her bedside, but was pulled out of bed and toward the door by a scowling templar, a stocky middle-aged man named Marley. Standing at the door was Knight-Commander Greagoir himself, who stepped aside as his templar pulled Lhiannon toward the door.

"You are coming to my office, Apprentice," the Knight-Commander said, leading the march through the halls toward the stairs. Lhiannon saw other templars stationed along the hallway, guarding the doorways and barking commands for the mages to stay in their rooms and be quiet.

Fear began to settle into Lhiannon's stomach and hot tears began to burn in her eyes. She nearly had to run in her bare feet to keep up with the relentless pace Marley was keeping as he all but dragged her along by the arm. She turned to look at the man holding her. "What's happening? What have I done?" she asked again, her voice barely more than a cracking whisper.

"That remains to be seen."

Her mind raced with questions. Why were they taking her? What had happened? As she continued her frantic pace to keep up with Marley, a more terrifying question came to her:

Are they taking me to be made Tranquil?

At that thought, she began to struggle with the templar in earnest, trying to jerk her arm from his iron grasp and dragging her feet along the cool stone floor of the hallway. Her shoulder screamed in protest as Marley yanked her arm. She began to pound the silverite encased arm of the templar holding her with her free hand, the fist making a dull thumping sound as it impacted the metal. "No! Let me go! Don't make me Tranquil! It's not fair! I haven't done anything!"

"Do you want to call a smite down upon you, girl?" Marley said, his voice a hiss in Lhiannon's ear. "If you keep struggling, I'll have no choice but to do it and I assure you, it won't be a pleasant experience for either of us."

Greagoir turned his head, looking over his shoulder to where Lhiannon was being pulled behind him. The templar was pushing her flailing hand away with a scowl on his face. "You are not being made Tranquil," the Knight-Commander said. "However, if you keep screaming and causing a fuss, you'll be taken to a cell and kept there until we are certain you are telling the truth."

After what seemed like an eternity, they reached the Knight-Commander's office. The templar holding Lhiannon's arm pulled her to a chair across from Greagoir's desk and deposited her into it. Once he had released her arm, he stood directly behind the chair, arms crossed over his armored chest. Another templar stood in the doorway, waiting for orders from the Knight-Commander.

"Captain, go wake the First Enchanter," Greagoir said, his voice a firm command. Once the templar left, Greagoir turned his attention to the weeping, scared young apprentice seated in the chair across the desk. Lhiannon had her arms wrapped around her, her head bowed and long strands of her hair were falling into her face. Greagoir watched as several tears fell from the girl's face into her lap, small wet spots appearing on the dark fabric of her nightdress.

Reaching into his armor, Greagoir pulled out a small, clean kerchief. He walked around the desk to stand next to Lhiannon, holding the small square of fabric out to her. "Here," he said, his voice low and not unkind, "you may wish to use this."

Lhiannon looked up at him and sniffled. Her eyes were red and tear filled, and several wet tracks glistened on her face. She looked confused at his small offer of kindness. With a shaking hand, she reached out and took the proffered cloth. "Thank you."

As Lhiannon used the soft cloth to dry her cheeks and dab at her eyes, she heard rustling and footsteps from behind her. The footsteps drew closer, coming to stand next to the Knight-Commander. Looking up, Lhiannon saw the First Enchanter looking down at her, then over to where Greagoir stood.

"Greagoir, what is going on here? Why have you called me down in the middle of the night and brought this apprentice to your office?"

"Irving, Apprentice Anders has gone missing."

Lhiannon took a sharp breath, clutching the kerchief tightly in one hand as it hovered near her face. Her stomach sank as her shocked brain processed what the Knight-Commander had just said. "What?"

"That is why you are here, Apprentice Amell," Greagoir said, turning his hard gaze onto her. "You are here to answer questions regarding his disappearance. It is a well-known fact that the two of you are close friends. We are here to determine your involvement. Now, tell us."

Patting at her eyes, Lhiannon took a hitching breath. "I don't know anything, ser. Honest, I don't."

The Knight-Commander crossed his armored arms over his chest and for a brief moment, Lhiannon wondered if he slept in his armor. It was as brightly polished as she had ever seen it, even at this late hour. Templar Marley came to stand next to Greagoir, joining the Knight-Commander's scowling.

"Apprentice," the Knight-Commander continued, "we know you and Apprentice Anders are close. I find it very difficult to believe he never said anything to you. The templars have searched the tower and found no sign of him. Where is he?"

"Ser, I don't know!" Lhiannon said, her voice beginning to crack.

"Do not lie to the Knight-Commander!" Marley bellowed, looming over Lhiannon menacingly. The First Enchanter began to protest, but stopped in mid-sentence with a gesture from the Knight-Commander.

"I'm not lying!" Lhiannon met the templar's glare, her anger beginning to grow larger than her fear of the templars or whatever punishment they might threaten her with. She had no idea where Anders was, that was the Maker's honest truth. He had never spoken to her of his desire to leave the Tower before his Harrowing. He had been unhappy, yes, but she never thought he would simply try to escape. That was when the realization hit her: he did not tell her for just this reason. He did not want her to be able to tell the templars of his plans. Whether that was to protect her or himself, she was not certain. Either way, they would learn nothing of significance from her, and that was mostly likely just what Anders had wanted. Hot tears burned in her eyes once more. She covered her face with her hands, openly weeping into them in both anger and grief. She was angry at Anders for leaving her in this position, yet grieved for his sudden absence. She hated the templars for believing her a liar, and hated the First Enchanter for not intervening.

It was the most alone she had felt since the days she traveled from Greenwood Vale to Kinloch Hold, her hands bound tightly in front of her.

With the quiet clearing of his throat, the First Enchanter moved forward and interposed himself between the armored forms of the templars. He leaned casually against the desk, his relaxed posture a stark contrast to those of Greagoir and Marley's rigid stances.

"Apprentice," Irving said, his voice soothing and calm, "if you know anything—anything at all—that may help us determine Apprentice Anders' location, please tell us." He paused as Lhiannon continued weeping, then leaned forward to put a gentle hand on her shoulder. "I know Anders was unhappy with having to wait for his Harrowing. Do you think this could be a reason for him to escape?"

Lhiannon pulled her hands away from her face. She could feel the heat radiating off her cheeks and her eyes stung from her tears. She sniffled slightly, patting her skin with the damp kerchief in an effort to dry them. "Maybe… he was unhappy at having to wait…"

"I knew it!" Marley scowled, turning to regard Greagoir and pointing toward Lhiannon. "She knows exactly what that troublemaker was planning, yet did nothing to stop it. She needs to be punished for not reporting this to the templars."

"Apprentice, I grow tired of your denials," Greagoir said, leveling an accusatory finger at Lhiannon. "You will tell us exactly how Anders escaped and why. You will tell us how long he planned his escape and your role in abetting him."

Lhiannon felt something snap inside her, her grief and confusion quickly turning to anger and rage. She was telling them the truth. She had never caused them any trouble in the past; well, any trouble that she had been caught involved with. As far as she knew, they did not know about the secret passage she and Anders had used to climb to the top of the tower to watch the Grey Wardens a year ago. They did not know about the hot foot stunts or any other little pranks that they had all pulled on each other. They did not know about the stolen brandy and the encounter between her and Anders at the lake.

"I. Don't. Know," Lhiannon said, her voice a growl through gritted teeth. The First Enchanter looked upon her tone with disapproval, but she was past caring. "I don't know how many times I can say it. Anders never told me he was planning to escape. I don't know where he would go, or what he would do, or even how he left." She paused, taking a deep, shuddering breath before continuing. "You can threaten me with chores, or floggings, or even… worse. It doesn't change the fact that I can't tell you what I don't know."

"Put her into solitary confinement until she breaks," Marley said, turning to plead his case to the Knight-Commander. "A few days in shackles with no human contact and only meager meals and she'll be begging to tell you what she knows."

First Enchanter Irving moved slightly to stand between Lhiannon and the two angry templars. "May we speak privately, Greagoir? Just you, me, and the Apprentice?"

After a moment of silence, Greagoir nodded curtly and ordered an unhappy Marley to leave. Irving watched the templar leave the office, slamming the door shut behind him. Once the echoes of the door faded away, Irving moved to stand next to Greagoir so they could both see Lhiannon.

"I believe that sort of punishment is uncalled for, Greagoir. This Apprentice has never been brought before either you or me for disciplinary action in the past, is that not so?"

The Knight-Commander frowned deeply, his brows lowering and nearly touching. "She has not, Irving. However, there is a first time for everything and this is a serious offense."

"I agree," the First Enchanter said, his gaze falling onto Lhiannon. She looked up at him, confused as to where he was leading the conversation. "However, I have worked closely with her and her mentor over the last year. I believe her when she says she doesn't know what happened to Apprentice Anders."

The Knight Commander looked at Lhiannon, his gaze one of stern suspicion. "And if she is lying to both of us? Her transgression will have to be punished most severely."

"And it will be," the First Enchanter said, turning once more to Lhiannon. Though he looked at her with compassion, there was hardness to his expression as well. "I will ask you one more time, Apprentice. This is your last chance to tell the truth. If it discovered later that you lied to the Knight-Commander and me, I will see you harshly punished myself. Now, do you know anything about Apprentice Anders' escape? Did you help him in any way?"

Lhiannon looked both the First Enchanter and Knight-Commander directly in the eye and shook her head once. "No, First Enchanter. The first I heard of Anders' escape was when Knight-Commander Greagoir and Templar Marley woke me up. I swear it." She looked over to Greagoir, meeting his firm glare. "I will make a vow upon the Chant of Light, if need be."

The Knight-Commander snorted and shook his head. "Apparently, that won't be necessary, Apprentice."

Irving tilted his head once toward the Knight-Commander. "Thank you, Greagoir. I believe we are finished then?"

"Yes, it appears that we are." The Knight-Commander turned his attention one last time onto Lhiannon. She felt the weight of his gaze on her, weighing her down as if it were a physical presence. "The First Enchanter shows a great deal of trust in you, Apprentice. Take care that you do not—and have not—dishonored that trust. Once lost, trust is very difficult to find again." With that, Greagoir moved from the office in a rustle of metal, sensing that the First Enchanter wanted to speak with the young mage alone. Greagoir had a great deal of respect for the First Enchanter, though they were well known for butting heads from time to time. Irving was a fair man and had a healthy respect for the duties the templars were charged with. They did not always agree, but always seemed to find a common ground between the obligations and requirements of the Maker and Chantry, and the needs of the mages. They might be two diverse personalities, but both had the protection of mages at the forefront of their minds.

With a sigh, Irving turned back toward Lhiannon. "I don't think I need to tell you, Apprentice, that the Knight-Commander will be watching you very closely from now on."

Lhiannon nodded, sniffling slightly and using the kerchief to dab at the wet streaks on her cheeks, hopefully for the last time this night. "Yeah, I suppose."

"He will also insist that Enchanter Sari and I keep close tabs on you as well." Irving sighed, his hand stroking the long hair covering his chin. "I will not have an easy time in these next few days. I will have to answer many questions about how and why Apprentice Anders could have slipped through the templars' guard. The Knight-Commander will also have to answer to his superiors, which will make him extremely unhappy."

"I'm sorry Anders caused such a mess for you."

"This sort of thing doesn't happen often, but it does happen. The Knight-Commander takes great pains to make sure the apprentices and young mages remain here in the Tower until given permission to leave." Irving paused for a moment, then motioned for Lhiannon to stand and follow him toward the door. "No matter what you may think, Apprentice, Greagoir takes his duty to protect mages very seriously. He and I may not see eye to eye on some matters, but I respect him a great deal."

Irving led Lhiannon through the halls of Kinloch Hold toward the dormitories that housed the apprentices. She was quiet, but also visibly relieved. Irving, for the most part, believed her when she said she did not know about Anders' escape. He remembered his warning to her just after the chaos sowed by Remille a year before. He had tried to tell her to be wary of the mage because of his troublesome nature. Now, she was finding out why his warnings were justified. Greagoir often believed in guilt by association because he had seen it many times in his years as Knight-Commander. Blood mages rarely practiced alone; they were drawn to each other like moths to flame. Then there were those mages that believed in violent separation from the Chantry. They always found each other, emboldened by their common belief to the point where, every few years, the templars had to thwart an uprising before it materialized. Troublesome mages often traveled in packs and Greagoir believed Lhiannon near the center of the trouble Anders had caused.

"And here you are, Apprentice," Irving said as they reached the doorway leading to the dormitory with Lhiannon's bed and belongings. A very nervous Tallia leapt from her bed, gasping in relief as Lhiannon smiled at her.

Before Lhiannon could enter her room to rejoin her friend, Irving reached out and lightly touched Lhiannon's arm. She turned to him, a small smile on her face. "Thank you, First Enchanter."

Irving nodded once, winking at the young woman before him. "I shall see you and Enchanter Sari after your lessons tomorrow, as per usual. Remember, though, what we discussed earlier."

"I will."

Irving watched as Lhiannon turned away and nearly ran to her elven friend, who gathered her up into a tight hug before quickly peppering her with questions, one on top of the other. Their voices faded as Irving walked back toward his quarters, rubbing his forehead and letting a wave of healing magic course through him.

He did not look forward to the questions both he and Greagoir would be asked in the following days.

I apologize for the delay in this chapter and possibly the next chapter of "Retribution." It's been a very hectic week or so for this girl. My router died and I'm having issues with the new one, so no internet at home for the moment (at least I have my cell phone!). Our house also sustained wind damage from a storm that blew through my area last week, so the hubby and I are working on that (and the wind just won't stop blowing!). All the stress has had me feeling under the weather too, which exacerbates the sometimes icky feelings I get from being pregnant. Ugh. What a week.

Special thanks go out to reviewers Suilven, Aura of Darkness Night, Wyl, Arsinoe, Ventisquear, naomis8329, and Tyanilth. You all rule!

Thanks to those of you reading and lurking in the background as well!