That day after Hermione left his rooms, her mind began to reel and spin with plans and possibilities. She could become like him, get close enough to the enemy and strike. She was nothing like Ron and Harry, their hotheaded tempers of taking action before thinking it through, Hermione liked to played her cards right. If she could get close enough, create the ideal friendship then maybe there was nothing Severus wouldn't do for her. He owed her after all; he put her parents to their end on her behalf. Hermione's thoughts stopped. Could she do such a thing? Could she really blackmail someone who has lived his life trying to atone for his sins? She had no clue, but the greed and desire to avenge her family, to end this killing and widespread of evil and corruption, was so great it coursed through her veins. She needed to think on it greatly, everything must be planned accordingly in order to do anything, and she needed to look at every angle and every possibility.
Three days later found Severus as fully recovered as possible in his book. Poppy had stop by earlier in the day to give her final assessment, Hermione and Minerva listened to the two's loud bickering from outside the door like two eavesdropping teenagers. Minerva tried to muffle her laughter as Hermione stared on with concern.
"Does this always happen?" Hermione questioned.
"Don't touch me there woman!" She could hear Severus shout.
"Stop being such a pansy!" They could hear Poppy's retort.
"Pretty much, I usually am not present during these times, but when I am, they are at each others throats." Minerva chuckled again as she heard something being knocked over. Suddenly the door swung open, revealing a flustered Poppy, panting heavily with anger. Hermione and Minerva straighten up quickly, trying to look as innocent as possible, yet to no avail.
"Don't play innocent with me you two! You're both just as bad as him!" Came Poppy's frazzled tone. Both Minerva and Hermione leaned sideways to see Severus with a smug look playing across his lips, arms folded in front of him in triumph. Poppy pushed her way from the scene, nodding her frustrated goodbye as she took her leave.
"Really, must you be so tiresome?" Minerva questioned.
"Why do women feel the need to coddle me like I am going to break?" He brood.
"Because we care, that is usually what one does when they care for them." Hermione's comment seemed to hang in the air as Severus looked at his hands with a passive expression and Minerva watched him with owl eyes.
"Then why don't you let us coddle you?" Minerva spoke softly.
"Because I don't need it." Severus growled
"Neither do I." Hermione interjected.
"Some need to know that they have a support system."
"Then why do you always disregard yours?" Her gaze pierced him and Severus could feel the rest of his protective walls begin to unravel. She could see right into his soul and he couldn't hide anything from her. Minerva watched on in amazement as the scene unfolded in front of her, this young woman penetrated his guard as if it was nothing. It had taken the older woman 8 years to peel back only a quarter of it Finding that the tension was going to thick for her taste in the room, Minerva excused herself to put the kettle on as Hermione and Severus continued to hold their own staring contest.
"I thought we were becoming friends." Severus spoke, once the door clicked shut behind Minerva.
"We are, but you are not in this alone, you don't have to be."
"What impression did I give that I have someone who is in this with me?"
"Am I not your friend? Is not Minerva and Albus at least your confidants and backbone?"
"Albus is merely another master and Minerva, a colleague. You are my only true 'friend' that I have as of yet. Forgive me if I am not used to having someone to talk to."
"Minerva counts you as a very close friend, you merely find the need to push her and Poppy away."
"Poppy was merely doing her job."
"In the years that I have had to sit a night in the infirmary or stand at the side of Harry's or Ron's, she has never once acted in such a way. She cares for you and values your life."
"In the hopes that I do not die and leave the order to fend for themselves. I am valuable to both sides more alive than dead."
"Do you ever listen to yourself? Have you no hope, or faith?"
"Hope has disowned me long ago, and faith? What faith is there when I prayed to the gods above to save my only friend and they betrayed me, Merlin betrayed me."
"My parent's have just died and you speak of such heart retching things that make me welcome death whole heartedly. How dare you choose death as an easy way out then to enjoy that which you have been gifted with! Many have not had the luxury to redeem themselves, to be given a second chance to make amends and you sit here brooding like it is the fourth coming!"
"What second chance have I received to redeem myself? Do not speak of which you do not understand fully. I gathered and gave information to the Dark Lord knowing that it would cause my friend's intimidate death. I went to beg for her mercy and he did nothing but slaughter her like a pig. I begged Albus to save her, to hide her from the world completely and he made a Death Eater her secret keeper. I live every day with that knowledge and that blood on my hands and since then have never willed myself to open up to another. By switching to the side of light, I knew and longed to be right, I am yet again an outcast and considered a traitor by both sides. So what would you have me do with my second chance? Smile? Laugh? There is nothing in my world that would warrant such a rare thing until I had met you, but I cannot smile, laugh nor talk to you openly in front of others unless I wish to risk our necks."
"God give me courage to show you, you are not alone." Hermione walked the distance that separated them and captured his hands within her own. He stiffened, never straying his gaze from her hands that clasped his own. When he refused to meet her gaze, she raised her hand to his chin, forcing his eyes to meet her own. "Severus, trust me. I will never leave you to fend for yourself. I am here for you, from now until always."
"You know of not what you speak."
" I speak of what is in my heart."
His onyx eyes bore into her liquid brown ones and he seemed to lose his breath. Emotion began to wrap itself around him and his throat began to tighten and burn with the things his heart wished to say.
Hermione watched his eyes and couldn't help but finally come to her own conclusion. She would gain her revenge, learn everything she could from him, but unlike everyone else who used him, she would not use him to kill for her. She would never hurt him intentionally or leave his side until her dying day. She would care for him and be his confident.
They stayed like that until the door suddenly open and they ripped themselves away from each other, as if burned. They didn't talk the rest of the day, completely staying hidden within the confines of their rooms.
The rest of the week had passed and the three of them grew gradually close, they helped her pack the things she wished to take with her and move in to with in her new chambers. Dumbledore had sent a letter a few days ago, informing Hermione that because now she was technically going to be an adult and was considered an orphan (In the politest way), she was entitled to move into one of the many Professor chambers the school had to offer. She was still required to fulfill her Head Girl duties, but no longer was next to Gryffindor tower. Now she was in a neutral place that even, if and when the Slytherins needed something, none of her fellow classmates could begrudge them.
Today they had woken up, the marking of the two weeks of her grieving period and the given absence from her normal life, they sat at the table each eating a scone and nursing their own coffee or tea as they talked about their common ground, school.
"I think I will like the new chambers, now I can get the peace and quiet that I deserve. The noise from the common room always leaked through the cracks of the walls."
"Yes, when I was Head Girl, I recalled that too, those rooms really do need to be patched up."
"Most likely from the face that you sleep next to a bunch of meowing kittens, not to mention the fact that if Potter and Weasley weren't yapping so much, it would have been more enjoyable." Both women threw a dirty look, typical Slytherin thing to say, they concluded.
"And you Slytherins, are you always so quiet and brooding? Even in the common room?" Hermione gave a skeptic look. Severus, matching her look, let a smile slip through his lips.
"Yes in fact we are quite the mature sorts."
"More like the boring, sort." Minerva chuckled, their banter continuing on until the morning was through and the house grew silent of chatter and loud with music as they milled around gathering and packing their things. As the day grew towards mid afternoon they closed up the rooms, the conservatory last, since Hermione had no clue on what to do with it.
"What to do with you?" She muttered to the room filled with exotic plants and ingredients. Her work space was cleaned and prepared for when she decided to make her next batch of potions and her cabinet that was once full of potions, now stood empty since the house elves were instructed to put them in Hermione's new storerooms at the school.
"You can transfer them to my green house at the school and if you wish to brew you can use my lab. I have more than enough room in the green house and even more available space in my lab." Hermione turned to the rumbling voice behind her.
"You would allow another in your private space? Why Severus, I feel so honored." She chuckled and his serious expression disappeared, a light smile gracing his features instead.
"Will you help me crate everything then?"
"No, I will send one of the house-elves to take it there. I need to get everything separated and cleaned out before you can take up the space."
"Why not have the house-elves do that as well?" She asked him, curious as she motioned for him to follow her and sit on the large settee by the windows.
"It is something I like to do and know where I put everything."
"I should like to help, would after supper tomorrow night be alright?"
He nodded yes and they both fell silent, Hermione leaning over the windows ledge, letting the breeze from the afternoon play with her hair, and Severus simply staring at the creature before him.
"How are you?" She turned her face too look at him, her expression just as blank as his. She didn't know how she really was, sad, depressed, trying to stay afloat yet relieved and constantly plotting to take her revenge. That was something she couldn't tell him, yet at the same time did you call it lying by not informing him what she really planned to do? It was for a good cause and if their friendship could become strong then they could make it through anything.
After a while she answered him, "I'm okay."
"Hermione, when we go back, please do not think you can not talk to me, but for appearance sake- I know Severus. Don't worry." Hermione cut in. She turned to look out the window again, waiting a few moments before she felt the urge to speak again. "I like how we three have gotten close, it will be a shame that our social circumstances cause us to act indifferent towards each other. May I write to you?"
"You may."
"Will you answer?"
"Of course."
"Thank you." This seemed to cause Severus to go still. Hermione turned to him when she did not hear his usual shallow breathing. He was unsure of what to think, He had been thanked plenty of times by Dumbledore and Minerva, but by her, it felt different. It felt real, fulfilling, 'what was it he was feeling? Love? Fulfillment? He sure hoped not, he already head to risk her safety and most likely her trust, but he did not ever want to risk hurting her heart.' There was a knock on the door behind them and they looked to see Minerva.
"Everything has been sent back to Hogwarts, its dinner time and we should make out way back." They both nodded and Severus made to get up but Hermione seemed to be frozen in time.
Hermione felt a moment of weakness, she didn't want to go back, to face her life there or anywhere outside the confines of these walls. She didn't want to think about the new comments that the junior Death Eaters would throw at her or suffer through the sad and pitiful looks from friends and acquaintances. She didn't want to be reminded, here at home for the past few days it felt like her parents had simply gone on vacation or were at work, but at school, there will be no owls or warm wishes for holidays, she was truly alone. 'No, I'm not alone.' She stopped herself, she was strong and able, she was Hermione Jean Granger and she was going to put her chin up high and fight, like everyone else was. Fight for the freedom and the chains of the Dark Lords rise to power.
So when they finally arrived back to school, she paid no mind to the whispers of the mass and strode down the aisle to sit next to her friends with a smile and confidence of a mature witch.
A/N: Hello wonderful readers! i am extremely sorry for the delay, but i'm sure as you've read this chapter, my grammar and such is up to par! It is a wonderful thanks to my new Beta Abreana. I will be going on a long extended vacation to Albania, bc, i am albanian and i've decided to spend the summer out in the wilderness if you'll please, so i will not have any new updates for three months! I know very sad! but i will NOT abandon this story a second time. Because of the long wait for more chapters i leave you with a gift. Another chapter to the story, so with out further ado, click next chapter :)