Chapter Five

AN: The amount of views and reviews I got yesterday bowled me over, so I just had to keep writing. Yes, I know this upcoming plot device has been used before, but I wanted to put my own spin on it. I read everyone else's spins and went "Hey, this looks like fun."

Still holding onto Tamsin's hands, Kenzi backed onto the bed until she sat cross-legged on the mattress, looking up at the Valkyrie. Tamsin was still looking at the floor, trying to figure out the best way to begin her story. She opened her mouth a few times, then shut it again, each time with a shaky sigh as she forced back tears.

"Valkyries… A Valkyrie is trained for battle. Our sole purpose lies in war and in bringing soldiers back to Valhalla. It's what we're made for. But sometimes…"

Tamsin pulled back from Kenzi and began to pace, her hands gesturing in halting, trembling movements. "Sometimes…if a Valkyrie…if they meet someone… Sometimes Valkyries find a warrior. These warriors are called 'chosen' warriors, but the Valkyries can't really help who they…who the warriors are. If a Valkyrie falls for a warrior, then she…well…Falls.

"A Fallen Valkyrie's life cycle immediately becomes her last. She gets her wings, but they're black and rough. It means that she's accepted the Valkyrie Bond. Her purpose is now her warrior, and she will never set foot in Valhalla again. She can still take souls to the gate, but she cannot pass through. If she dies, she goes to Fólkvangr – Freya's realm."

"So the Valkyrie Bond is when a Valkyrie falls in love?" Kenzi interpreted, her voice kind.

Tamsin nodded. "Yeah." She sighed again. "A Fallen Valkyrie is constantly drawn to her warrior. She literally feels a pull in her heart to follow them. If her warrior is close, her heart even begins to form a connection, but that connection breaks when the warrior moves away, causing the Valkyrie a moment of pain. She is completely devoted to her warrior, even if…even if her warrior doesn't feel the same."

"And if the warrior does?"

"If a warrior loves his or her Valkyrie in return then he or she can accept the bond."

"What happens to them?"

"The Valkyrie Rises. Her wings become pure white and she and her warrior become one. Their powers grow. Their lives become entwined and can continue for millennia. Some of the lore says that one bonded couple lived for over ten thousand years. The passage says something like 'civilizations rose and fell around them but time could not touch them.'" Tamsin's indrawn breath quivered with unshed tears. "Falling and Rising used to be uncommon, but not rare. Bonding used to be something that was cherished. Valued. That a warrior could be so strong as to sway a Valkyrie and for the two to be together. Unstoppable. But that…not anymore."

"Why not?"

"Because of the drawbacks of the bond. Warriors would bond to Valkyries for the sake of power and then try to go back to old lovers only to find that they could neither love them nor…feel pleasure from them at all. A Valkyrie and her bonded warrior can only find joy in each other. Sometimes warriors would kill Valkyries in their sleep to try and break the bond, but it never worked. The bond is eternal. Valhalla is filled with more than a few resentful warriors and heartbroken Valkyrie. It happened so many times that most Fallen Valkyries would just accept their fate without question knowing it would hurt less in the long run."

"But what if they didn't just 'accept their fate'? What if they chose to complete the bond? How does a warrior even accept the bond?"

"The Valkyrie has to offer it and the warrior has to accept. But once the Valkyrie offers, there's no turning back: in that moment, her life is in her warrior's hands."

"What happens to the Valkyrie if the warrior says no?"

Tamsin shrugged. She'd yet to look Kenzi in the eye. "It depends. Sometimes the Valkyrie just continues living her life as Fallen. Some Valkyries lose their wings. Some actually die."

"Of a broken heart?"

Tamsin let out a weak laugh. "Yeah, pretty much."

Kenzi was silent for a moment as she contemplated the Valkyrie's story, letting everything sink in. "So what does this have to do with you, Tam? Why is this bonding thing worrying you?"

The blonde bit her lip. "Momz…did Bo ever tell you about my wings?"

The human nodded. "Yeah, she said they were gorgeous. White with hints of brown."

The fact that Bo had called her wings 'gorgeous' lifted Tamsin's heart even as it tore. If the succubus could see her wings now, she wouldn't think so highly of them. "Ok, um…I'm gonna show you my wings now. You're gonna see my face, but don't freak out, ok? I'm not casting doubt on you or anything." The Valkyrie took a step back from the bed and let her face darken and hollow to its true form.

Kenzi had to force herself not to reel backwards when she saw Tamsin's face. Bo had said that it was terrifying yet hauntingly beautiful, but to Kenzi it was just terrifying. She couldn't read an ounce of emotion from the woman who called her momz and it scared her more than she wanted to admit. But fear was replaced by awe and then dismay as Tamsin's wings reached from her back and stretched to their full length. "Oh, Tam-Tam," Kenzi murmured, standing from the bed and reaching out to touch the feathers.

"Don't," Tamsin warned, holding out her hand. "You'll be cut. A Valkyrie's wings can act as both weapon and shield. Only one person in a Valkyrie's life can safely touch her wings." Kenzi nodded, but didn't quite pull her hand away. Seeing this, Tamsin reached back and pulled out a feather, handing it to the human. "Hurry. A Valkyrie feather doesn't last long on its own." Kenzi gently took the feather in her hands, her heart sinking even further when she felt the rough texture. A moment later, the feather disappeared in a wisp of black smoke. "It's supposed to be a sort of white mist…" Tamsin mourned as she watched it go. With a shuddering exhale, she retracted her wings and let the darkness fade from her face. Kenzi ran forward and wrapped her arms around the Valkyrie's neck. Tamsin returned the embrace, and the human could feel the blonde's tears through the fabric of her shirt.

"When you doubled over in the Dal, that wasn't a cramp – that was the connection breaking in your heart," Kenzi realized, not letting go.

"Yeah."

"So that means…" Kenzi pulled back and looked at the Valkyrie in shock.

"Yeah," Tamsin repeated, hanging her head. After a pause, Kenzi lifted the blonde's chin with her fingers and when the Valkyrie met the human's gaze, she was surprised to find her smiling.

"She does care for you, you know."

Tamsin let out a breath in a sad sort of scoff. "Right. Cares. As a friend."

"I think it's more than that. But there's always time. Well, we kind of have to defeat a horde of sídhe, but after that there'll be time to figure this shit out." Kenzi cupped Tamsin's face in her hands. "Thank you for trusting me with this, T, even though I kind of strong-armed it out of you." This provoked the smallest of smiles from the Valkyrie, which was what Kenzi was hoping for. "I'm here for you, ok? Whenever you need me."

"Thanks, momz," the Valkyrie whispered, truly grateful.

A familiar voice muffled its way through the ceiling. "Tamsin? Kenzi? You guys ready? Where are you?"

"Keep your pants on, sugarsnatch, we'll be right down!" Kenzi shouted back. She gave Tamsin another hug. "We'll figure this out. I'm helping you figure this out whether you like it or not."

Her words gave Tamsin just the smallest bit of hope.

…

"Nice digs," Bo commented as she and Tamsin walked into the Valkyrie's apartment. "Not much for decorating, though, are you?"

Tamsin shrugged. "No need." The place was surprisingly bright, but bare and sparsely furnished with a very utilitarian feel to it. "Bedroom and bathroom are upstairs. I'll be down here if you need me."

"You're…not gonna stay with me again?"

Tamsin felt the tug at her heart and wished so desperately that she could fight it. "If you want, succulette. I suppose I can stay nearby." The grin that lit Bo's face at this response made everything worth it.

They changed separately – Tamsin into a t-shirt and sweats while Bo wore the infuriating black nightie again. As they had the night before, the succubus crawled under the covers while the Valkyrie stayed atop them, resting her sword by her nightstand. "Aren't you going to sleep?" Bo asked.

"I'm not tired."

Bo propped herself up and gave Tamsin a skeptical look. "You were awake all night last night."

"Valkyries can stay awake as long as they like. And I had a nap earlier."

"Tamsin…"

The Valkyrie let out a long-suffering sigh. "I suppose I'm a little tired."

"Good. Get under here and go to sleep."

Tamsin obeyed, thinking that as long as she and Bo kept their distance on the bed she'd be fine. But the succubus decided to curl up against the Valkyrie again, throwing an arm across her waist. "G'night, Tamsin."

Tamsin couldn't breathe – had to force herself to breathe. Aching with the knowledge that she may never have more than this, she accepted what she could, pulling the succubus into her embrace. "G'night, Bo."

…

Bo was dreaming.

She was back in that dark room – that blue-lit room with the elaborate, canopied crib. She was being carried, but she wasn't. She was watching, but she wasn't. The shadow was carrying her, placing the baby in the crib. And then he was the one watching, staring down at her with both pride and malice.

"Mo pháiste," the deep voice resonated. "I have such plans for you."

…

Bo sat up with a gasp, and her movement woke the Valkyrie beside her. "What, Bo, what is it?"

"I think…" the succubus tried to gather her thoughts. "It was a dream. A weird, weird dream." She paused before asking, "Tamsin, do you speak Irish at all?"

The Valkyrie rubbed sleep from her eyes as she tried to process what was going on. "A little, why?"

"Does 'mo fawshta' mean anything?"

"'Mo pháiste'? It means 'my child.' Why, where'd you hear that?"

Bo didn't answer as her thoughts became suspicions she couldn't help but dread. "Tamsin…is it possible that the Wanderer is my father?"

Language lesson time! (breaks out college notes):

I'ma try to keep this as simple as possible. Irish is weird in that when you put a possessive before a word, some words take extra letters. So separately, "mo" ("moe") means "my" and "páiste" ("PAWSH-tuh") means "child." But when you put them together, you get "mo pháiste" ("FAWSH-tuh"), because the "p" takes an extra letter.

I listened to the soundtrack from the movie Ink while writing this, particularly the song "Jacob's Chain." Have a listen, if you like.