They were the ones who could never truly join the crowd. They were too far to the extremes. They knew too much, and it showed in their bright, bored eyes, so people any less extreme would leave eventually, out of fright or confusion. So they had to react to each other the only way they knew how: by clashing and watching what type of sparks were born.

After all, no one really knows what they are doing in High School.

So two dangerous boys lay on the floor of an apartment, talking about girl trouble.

Well… one boy was talking about girl trouble.

The other was texting people at random. Boredom weighing him down like a lead sheet. Occasionally he'd offer an "mhmm," or "Yeah that sucks" but his heart wasn't in it. He'd heard it all before. Would hear it all again.

He froze as a thought struck him. The other boy didn't notice, as his beloved "Doesn't even notice [him] as potentially more than a roommate…" and the thought was horrid enough to hold him enraptured by it.

"Hey, Shinra…" the bored boy drawled, brightening eyes wandering, and a grin widening as a translucent layer of vision filled with images "Have you tried making her jealous?"

"I don't want to manipulate her!"

"Then why are you asking me for help?" the boy slunk closer to his only friend who would gracefully accept that title if pressed. "Am I really a last resort? Called on because she doesn't notice you, and Shizu-chan wouldn't put up with you?" He looked into eyes which were not usually this vague, and distant, willing them to focus on his. Very quietly he said "Or do you want me to help?"

Shinra looked away, unable to face the sharp redness of those eyes. "Izaya… if you're suggesting I go find some other girl and … just to make Celty recognize me as a sexual being…"

Izaya whispered into his friend's ear "Who said anything about girls?" He brushed Shinra's hair away from his eyes. "What you need is someone who can make you scream, doesn't mind being walked in on, and who is okay with this being a game."

"B-but where would you find someone like that?" Shinra stuttered and blushed fiercely, which, knowing that would only encourage the boy who loomed over him, merely served to compound his embarrassment, and deepen the blush. Damn bodies, you could understand every intricate piece of them and still not be able to control your own.

"Oh, I think I know someone just right for the job." Izaya's voice was breathy, and his red eyes bright. "You know, you are far too cute when you're frightened, Shin-chan!"

"You're a pervert, Iza…"

"I'm in good company, Shin-chan" Izaya whispered, trailing fingers to play with the buttons of his friend's shirt "But just think, if this is how you react to my words, and my closeness, think how easy it will be for us to convince her. All you'd have to do is hand over control. I'd take care of everything else."

"You're a… I'm not… well… I think I'm… Are you…"

"I am extremely attractive, is what I am… and you are attracted to talent."

"… or maybe I have a thing for monsters…" Shinra muttered.

Izaya laughed his high honest laugh, the one which said that he had known, but was happy that someone else had said it "maybe that too…" he rolled onto his back, leaving Shinra where his rampant blush attempted to make him burn a Shinra shaped hole into the tatami mat. Izaya, satisfied with the reaction he'd gotten, put his hands under his head and said in a sing-song voice "Anyways, that's how I would go about it."

After ten minutes of embarrassed/satisfied silence, there came the sounds of someone trying to get into the apartment. This someone had a key, and felt sure enough that she should be here that she made quite a lot of unintentional noise.

Shinra seemed to panic, and after a little gasp of "well now or never" from the aspiring doctor, Izaya felt a presence over him, and lips meeting his confident smile, which grew before getting the message, and fighting back. His fingers tangled in the other boy's hair.

A well placed knee knocked the nervous boy off his balance, and they rolled over together. "I thought we agreed that all you have to do is let me play with you?" Izaya breathed into his friend's neck.

Their wrestling had drawn the attention it had intended to. Shinra pulled the other's head into his neck, so that vision was completely obscured. He tried to speak despite the interruptions that came from Izaya's opportunistic tongue tasting his neck, and the way he could feel the badly restrained laughter distort Izaya's chest. "Welcome back, oh, there's no trouble! Izaya-kun was just going to help me study for an anatomy test" he said, by way of excusing himself.

Izaya laughed, "So you don't have to worry about him, ne! He's in good hands!" he managed to say before a hand was clamped over his mouth. The door was hesitantly slid back into place and Shinra let go. "You are far too frightened of me seeing her" he cocked an eyebrow "What do you think I'm going to do? Steal her? Corrupt her?" he whispered, slowly unbuttoning Shinra's shirt.

"Something like that" Shinra said, blushing intensely, and looking away.

"That's adorable. You don't need to worry. She's not my type."

"Y-you've never seen her.…"

"I don't need to. She left. That's all I need to know."

"What do you mean by… what's with that expression?" Izaya looked like he was sizing his friend up.

"How thick are your walls?"

"What?!"

"You want this to work, right? You need to be heard. We can achieve that one of two ways."

"T-two…"

"Yeah" Izaya was deadly serious but his lopsided frown betrayed his amusement. "We can just run with it, and let our hormones and imaginations take control, or we can make all the requisite sounds to make her think we're being hormonal teenagers, while sitting several feet from each other."

There was silence.

Then Shinra broke it "What?"

"you want me to go into more detail?"

"No… who are you and what have you done with Orihara Izaya, who always gets what he wants by any means necessary?"

Izaya shrugged and lay beside Shinra, laying his head on his friend's chest. "I have priorities. Who says that what I want is so easy?"

"Err…"

"What I want from you, I can't manipulate out of you."

"Now that's hard to believe…"

"What I want from you… is a friend… one who isn't trying to kill me." Izaya shut his eyes. "I've given you so many reasons to hate me so far, and you haven't grabbed hold of them. So whatever you choose here, I will not let you have the option of hating me for it."

"You make it sound like I didn't just make my choice clear?"

"Ha, you didn't. You're a fool if you think I'd take a panic reaction seriously. Your heart only just stopped trying to escape now." Izaya propped himself up again and gave a sweet, borderline terrifying smile. "If you're going to put yourself at my mercy, you have to know what you're agreeing to, and I need to know the rules of the game."

"R-Rules"

"Oh yes. For example, I'm pretty sure that you want your first time with her to be a new experience. So rule number one: I can't do anything to you that she could, or would, do without requiring some highly embarrassing conversations first."

"E-embarrassing…"

"Which begs the question, you were the one who kissed me. Do you want me to kiss you? Now that that first is out of the way?"

"Uhhh…"

Izaya's eyes narrowed, and he licked his lips slowly "I can't hear you. I need to know just where I can put my hands, where I can put my lips." He whispered "After all, if I trespassed on one of your fantasies, you might forget whose name you're supposed to be screaming. That would ruin the effect."

Shinra swallowed nervously "l-lips can go anywhere…" he stammered.

"aaaaaaanywhere? That's quite a dangerous request."

"h-hands… hands aren't part of my f-fantasies…"

"Oh? So you don't think much about being taken? Having fingers run across your skin? Tangle in your hair? Scratch you till blood stains the floor?"

"Izaya! What sort of…"

"See, You don't want me to let my fantasies loose on you. There's very few people who can handle me." Izaya chuckled, "Tell me what you want, Shin-chan."

"I… I want you to k-kiss me… and leave marks on me… b-but no blood…you made it sound like you'd vivisect me…"

"okay, so no vivisecting." Izaya laughed. Running a finger down his friend's neck, chest, stomach, and dangerously close to the groin. "Do you want me to touch you here? If lips can go anywhere is this part of that? Do you want me inside you, taking you to the peak of pleasure available for men to experience?"

Shinra could barely breathe under the husky suggestions and intent eyes. He tried to nod, and his head felt like it was wobbling out of control.

A smirk, far too close to be ignored, drank in his discomfort "I can't hear you." It breathed.

"y-Yes… yes I want all of that…" Shinra shouted, because it was that or nothing. "just stop teasing me!"

"You think my promises are teasing?" he purred "Shin-chan, you haven't even seen me try." He backed away from the flushed and dishevelled Shinra, stood up. "So, with the kind of expectations you have, you would keep a stock of condoms. Where?"

"Whaa…"

"Condoms. If we're going to do this we're going to do it right."

"err… first aid kit… third cupboard from the left." Izaya searched through, found a couple and threw them to the ground near Shinra. He soon followed them, falling to his knees in front of his friend. Reaching out a hand and pulling the boy upright.

"Be patient. I have plans for you. First, I want you to strip me, slowly." Izaya spread his arms invitingly, but the hungry look in his, almost demonic, eyes, and the way he licked and bit his lip suggested it was a trap.

Shinra's hand came up to his own chest, in a feeble attempt to keep his heart from beating so painfully. Flushed, and still more embarrassed at his own reaction to his friend's shameless glare, he inched closer to Izaya. Keeping as much distance as possible, he held a pinch of Izaya's tight shirt in each hand, and tried to pull it away and over Izaya's head. He could see the silent laughter shake Izaya's chest, and felt the cool grip surround and guide his hands open.

One of Izaya's hands, over Shinra's gently pushed up at Izaya's shirt, while the open palm was made to feel and glide over every inch of skin and muscle along the meandering path. The other hand, with a finger under Shinra's chin, forced eye contact. Izaya leaned in closer, and Shinra, needing to look anywhere but at those calm eyes, saw the blushing. Revelling in newfound power, has never stopped someone from being a bundle of nerves.

Shinra's hands had gotten the message, and Izaya was soon freed of his overly tight shirt. The pause that followed stoked some curiosity in Izaya "Really, Shinra, anyone would think you'd never seen my skin before? You've patched up far more intimate parts of me."

There was a gulp "There was never this…"

"Anticipation?"

"Yeah…" Shinra watched his words run dry as Izaya started work on undressing him. Starting with the buttons that he'd not managed before, moving down to pants. The fingers that were practically gliding across his skin left something like a trail of sparks lingering in their wake.

"Anticipating what? Pray tell?" he said playfully. "Is Shin-chan distracted from me by his imagination?" he went through the awkward motions of removing his overly tight pants while the other couldn't see through his own embarrassed fantasies.

"What?! Er…"

"What is the fantasy Izaya doing to poor little Shin-chan" he tore open a condom which he held with involuntary expressions of disgust.

"There's no… I mean… I'm not…"

"Oh Shin-chan, You know how I am with competition." He quietly snapped his fingers as he remembered his missed step.

"Comp…" Shinra was silenced by two fingers pressed to his lips, slowly, carefully trying to claw their way into his mouth.

"I have to make you feel better than you even imagine me capable of…" Izaya said, barely above a breathy whisper, as he pushed Shinra onto his back.

Time passed in silence, quickly broken.

One whispered, the other screamed.

"…louder, no one would think I'm doing a good job if they heard you…"

"AHH… so that's where that is… Oh noo-oohh GOD!"

"God? I think I like that nickname. Again!"

"Izaya!"

Shinra caught his breath eventually "…that was… different…"

"Tell me about it" panted Izaya. "Fun though… I'll be sad if this works too quickly and I never get to see you like this again"

The blood that had been settling down in Shinra's tired veins immediately rushed to his face "I-Izaya! You- you don't need to be quite so open all the time…"

"Aww, but you're adorable when you're being pursued." The one eye not obscured by his splayed arm had a dangerous gleam. "and if I can make you react like that now, imagine what I'd be able to do with some practice"

"You mean that was… You haven't… You were a"

"Not~ Anymore~" Izaya very nearly sang in childish glee.

This story was written in a different hand, the author seemed prone to fits of excitement during which the careful rounded script of the philosophical discussions, and descriptions, would turn into spikey handwriting and rushed action scenes. Spikey writing for Izaya's lines,

Underneath it was written "You're not the only one, Writer-chan"

"See" Said Erika, pointing at the page, "That wasn't me, It was written sometime while the book was circulating."

Her drinking buddy held his head in his hands "That never happened… Why would anyone think that…"

"But who would, Who do you think would be able to contemplate that?"

"Without their brain cells collapsing in on themselves and atrophying, you mean?" Said a mortified Shinra.

"Well… I wouldn't put it like that…"

A/N: I was not expecting this pairing to work in any way... but It was sort of spawned by the thought "Both Shizaya and Shikizaya are just accepted as canon in a lot of Fanfic... what is it with Izaya and Shi names? So I had to write the Other Other Shizaya... which I acknowledge is more an Izara.

Plus Shinra likes to play matchmaker for Shizaya so why not give him some reasons to :P

Sorry Celty...