Hey everyone! This is an early update, because I put an idea in there, and I just couldn't stop after I started.:) The day is slowly approaching that I picked to advertise this fiction (two more days to be exact).:D HOPEFULLY! lol So, if you enjoy this story, please up-vote.:) It'll help a lot.:) Plus, I always feel so happy whenever I see that people enjoy what I write.:D I listened to a lot of Owl City typing this out, and I think my music choice has a lot of influence over my writing. lol But, without further ado, please enjoy this chapter!:D Don't forget to comment and let me know what you think!:D Or up-vote.:3
Lay and Luhan stood in Chanyeol's doorway, mouths a gape as Chanyeol rolled his eyes in annoyance- placing Baekhyun gently on his couch. "Were you raised in a barn? I really don't feel the need to cool the whole duplex down, thank you," he stated as they stepped inside and closed the door.
Chanyeol knelt down in front of Baekhyun as he checked on his leg- Lay and Luhan joining Baekhyun on the couch. Baekhyun stared quietly- blankly- at Chanyeol as he straightened back up. "His leg should be fine. It's just a sprain," he stated as he looked at Lay and Luhan. "Why'd you guys follow me home like lost puppies anyway," he asked, somewhat annoyed.
Lay looked up at Chanyeol and then back toward Baekhyun. "What? I can't make sure my best friend is okay," he asked, crossing his arms over his chest. Chanyeol scoffed. "Not when it means I have to be kind to people," he stated, just as Baekhyun looked up at him- a sad twinkle in his eye. "Uh… Never mind," Chanyeol stammered as he looked down. He went to walk into his kitchen when Kris popped up from behind one of the counters, scaring the ever living love out of Chanyeol. "Where the hell did you come from," he shouted, breathing heavily.
Kris shrugged, casually. "I climbed in through a window from your spare room," he stated, smiling. Chanyeol sent a death glare behind him toward Baekhyun- who flinched into Lay, and then looked back towards Kris. "And so, you just thought it'd be a good idea to climb in through it, and scare the loving hell out of me? And what are you doing here anyway" he asked, crossly.
Kris shrugged in response. "I didn't mean to scare you, but I miss you man. Ever since your dad forced you to attend that school for peasants, we hardly ever get to see you," he stated, looking down. But Luhan stood from the couch, awfully offended by his peasant remark. "Excuse you," he started. "I may not be rich like you, but I'm definitely not impoverished, ass. You need to work on your people meeting skills, because obviously you don't know how to talk to people without being uncouth," he stated, indignantly.
Kris stared at Luhan, heatedly until Chanyeol intervened and Luhan took his seat back down next to Lay. "I don't care how you treat people, but you do need to calm down, Kris. Besides, don't we have plans later on, anyway?"
Kris nodded. "Oh yeah! Suho and Sehun wanted to go out to some sort of charity event or some boring shit like that," he stated, enthusiastically. Chanyeol made a face as he scoffed. "What's the charity event anyway," he asked, uninterested. And Kris shrugged, equally uninterested. "I think it's something about awareness of something by the name of Cotard's Syndrome," he stated, yawning.
Chanyeol sighed heavily as a knock on his door caught his attention, and he turned to answer the door. To Chanyeol's dismay- there, in front of him- stood Chen, Suho, Sehun, Kai, and Sandara. Chanyeol made a face and Dara did not look pleased at all either as she shoved her way into Chanyeol's apartment. "Now, what's this I hear of you allowing another man to live with you?"
Chanyeol sighed heavily as he glared at Kris, who sunk behind the counter. "Noona, I can explain," he stated, following after her- leaving Kai to shut his door. Dara turned toward him, abruptly, pointing her finger in his face, furiously. "You best not be fucking him," she shouted and the whole room silenced.
Lay made a face as he looked at Baekhyun, who shook his head slowly. And then he looked back towards Chanyeol and the intruding female. Chanyeol made a face as well, but he looked more angry. "Excuse me, that's not all I do-" he stopped short as he glanced toward Baekhyun. He hated to admit it, but he really wanted to know what Baekhyun was like in the bed.
But he tossed the thought aside as Dara glared. "There! You looked somewhere else," she stated, looking around the guys in the room. She hated to admit it, but all the guys in this room all looked handsome. But she glared at two in particular, and it happened to be Baekhyun and Luhan. One sitting there, silently as he stared down at the ground and the other looked offended the second she rested her eyes on him- both seemingly suspicious in her eyes. "Well, either way," she stated, looping her arm around his and resting her head on Chanyeol's arm. "You need to get ready, so we can go," she stated, watching those two react. Baekhyun continued to stare down and Luhan turned away from them, huffing- making him more suspicious in her eyes now.
After getting ready, Baekhyun- still sitting on the couch with Lay and Luhan- looked up to see Chanyeol dressed in his formal attire with his hair done in a messy sweep. For the first time ever, Baekhyun thought he felt his heart race as he stared at him. But Dara smiled as she looped her arm around Chanyeol's arm again- though Chanyeol didn't look pleased. And suddenly Baekhyun felt emptier than he's ever felt as he watched Dara interact with Chanyeol.
There was a lot about Chanyeol that Baekhyun still knew nothing about, and he wasn't sure if he wanted to get any closer to this guy than he already was. Because for some reason, Baekhyun's chest ached, and he couldn't figure out why.
"We'll be gone for a little," Chanyeol stated, heading for the door with Dara. "Are you guys staying here with him? You know, to keep him company until we get back," he asked as Baekhyun stared up at Chanyeol. No matter what, Baekhyun felt he was never going to be able to escape this guy's entanglement. He seemed so nice and friendly – which would build Baekhyun's confidence a little- and then other times he just tore Baekhyun down- without even realizing it. That was the worst part for Baekhyun- he didn't even realize he was doing it.
But then again, Baekhyun couldn't understand why this upset him so much. Maybe because his parents were never this nice to him after he quit speaking, but Baekhyun watched as they left, leaving him there with Lay and Luhan.
Luhan stood, stretching his body. "How about we watch a movie," he asked, looking toward Baekhyun and Lay. Lay was all for it, but Baekhyun shook his head- he could feel tears pricking his eyes as he stared down at the ground. And he felt the pain in his chest, surprisingly strong for a second- and then just as quickly- he felt absolutely nothing as he whispered. "I just want to be alone today," he stated, still staring down.
Lay and Luhan both looked at him surprised that he'd actually talked. "What? Why," Lay asked as he continued to stare at Baekhyun, but now he did not receive an answer as Baekhyun stood. He grabbed a movie from one of the little tiers by the television now- mind suddenly changing- and handed it to Luhan. "Is this the one you want to watch," he asked, staring down at it. And Baekhyun nodded slowly, shuffling even more sluggishly toward his room.
Lay went to follow, but Baekhyun stopped him and pointed toward the bathroom. "Oh! You have to use the restroom? Okay, do you want us to wait to play the movie for you then," he asked, looking around the room that Baekhyun was headed into in awe. But Baekhyun shook his head this time as he continued to trudge onward toward his bathroom at a pace that he normally didn't walk.
And Lay found that strange. Baekhyun normally moved a little faster than that, but he didn't question him any further to keep him from the bathroom any longer. Lay found his spot back on the sofa- next to Luhan- as they started the movie.
Baekhyun shut the door to his room, locking it after he knew Lay and Luhan were entranced in the movie. He then proceeded to shuffle his way sluggishly to the bathroom- where he shut and locked that door too. He didn't want to worry his friends, but he was feeling more dead inside than normal. And he needed some way to relieve that numbness. He stumbled his way to the medicine cabinet after locking the bathroom door. This would hopefully slow anyone, who wanted to interfere, down.
He took three or four sleeping pills that he'd had prescribed to him for the insomnia and grabbed the little razor hidden under the countertop and wedged into the wooden frame. He'd hoped the sleeping pills would thin his blood enough for him to bleed out. He was just hoping he wouldn't wake up anymore- not after that pain he had felt- though extremely short. It still wasn't something he wanted to feel again as he placed the razor to the scarred, delicate skin.
He could already feel the tears threatening to spill over as he slowly ran the blade over the skin, pressing in further. He sat down on the floor, so not to make any noise in case he couldn't catch himself in time.
Chanyeol sighed heavily, bored and tired of Dara being there. But also something wasn't setting quite right in his stomach; his stomach doing flips. He was worried about something, and it was tugging at his heart, trying to warn him. But he didn't know quite what was bothering him yet.
He wondered if Baekhyun was having fun with his friends- wondering if they'd actually stayed with him. Or if they were going to stay with him until they got back. As Chanyeol and his group listened to the representation for Cotard's Syndrome, they wondered how anyone with this mental illness could survive the damage one caused themselves. His group of friends ended up donating thousands of dollars to this organization that was trying to help these people.
Chanyeol couldn't possibly imagine what it would feel like to be affected by this illness. He looked at Dara- who had donated twice as much as anyone- but still couldn't see why his father had forced them together. Dara didn't really love Chanyeol, and Chanyeol surely didn't love Dara the way his father wanted him to. He loved Dara, but it was more like the love he'd have for his sister- not someone he'd want to marry. But he knew his father would never be accepting of the fact that he preferred men.
He looked around, panic suddenly setting in around his heart, but he couldn't understand why as he looked at Dara. "What's wrong," she asked, studying his face. He looked as if he'd seen a ghost or something. He pulled out his cell phone, and dialed his apartment's phone number.
Almost an hour into The Dark Knight, Lay finally realized that Baekhyun has not rejoined them on the sofa- and knows it shouldn't take Baekhyun that long to use the restroom. He was just about to knock on Baekhyun's door when a ringing alarmed him and he looked at the intercom. He pressed the button, gently. "Hey, just checking up on you guys," he heard Chanyeol's voice through the speaker.
Lay sighed with relief as he smiled. "We were just watching a movie. But I was about to check up on Baekhyun. He's been in the bathroom for a while now," he stated, somewhat distracted. That was when Chanyeol's voice sounded panicked. "How long has he been in there," he asked. Lay thought for a moment, before he answered. "Well, I don't really remember. I got caught up in the movie, so… I think an hour," he stated, honestly.
It was quiet on the line. "Someone check on him now," Chanyeol stated, calmly. Lay didn't know why Chanyeol sounded panicky until he tried Baekhyun's door handle to find, dismally, that the door was locked. "Baekhyun," he called through the door, following it with a few loud raps on the door. But both Lay and Chanyeol heard nothing from the other side as Lay began to panic now. "Baekhyun, open the door," he called, rapping on it again. But Lay heard no answer nor did he even hear the sound of shuffling around inside the room. Luhan, who was also paying attention now, was worrying about Baekhyun as he walked up to the door as well.
Chanyeol could hear the panic in Lay's voice and Luhan's voice as they continued to call through the door and bang on it louder and louder. "I don't care what you have to do, but you get in that room and make sure he's okay," he stated, calmly over the line. "I'm on my way home now," he stated, just before hanging up.
Chanyeol tucked his phone back into his back pocket as he rushed toward the table that all his friends were sitting at, not wanting to just leave them clueless. "Hey guys, I'm going to have to bail on the rest of this charity event. I have an emergency at the house to take care of," he stated, bolting out the door. Dara stared at the door, displeased as everyone stood up to follow after Chanyeol. They knew him very well, and that this behavior wasn't normal for him. And they wanted to make sure everything was okay as they rushed after him.
Baekhyun could hear Luhan and Lay calling him from a distance- though they sounded more distant than he thought as he stared at his bathroom door that was slowly starting to spin. Looking at the door, he sluggishly made his way to the door by crawling, but his strength failed him as he laid in front of his bathroom door- hand out stretched in an attempt to open the door. But his arm fell limply to the floor as his vision became hazy.
Lay and Luhan heard a small thump on the other side of the door, their panic jumping into their throats as Lay began to beat his shoulder against the door. "We need someone who can kick the door in," he cried out, desperately still trying to get inside the room. Luhan looked at Lay in desperation- not really knowing how he was going to find them- bolted out of the apartment in search of Tao, Xiumin, and Do. Luhan didn't even know where to start to look for them, but he was going to find them. He passed by several shops, looking in through the windows as he sped by. He stopped short when pink hair caught his attention at a coffee shop, and he burst into the store, scaring all the customers.
Luhan rushed up to the muscular boy with the pink hair, tapping him on the shoulder- dismally realizing Xiumin was alone. When Xiumin turned around, Luhan smiled pleasantly at him- his eyes disappearing behind his relief, waved, and yanked Xiumin out of the shop- making him drop his coffee.
Lay beat on the door still, desperately trying to get to Baekhyun as he worried about where Luhan had run off to. "Baekhyun! Please, let me in," he cried out, choking slightly. Lay hadn't even realized he'd started crying as he beat his fist against the door again- harder than he thought. "Baekhyun, open the door," Lay cried, the tears finally spilling over as he continued to bang against the door. To Lay's relief Luhan came rushing back into the apartment with a confused Xiumin in tow- tripping over his own feet- trying to keep up with Luhan. "Kick the door in," Luhan demanded, pointing at Baekhyun's door as Xiumin stared at them- confused and reluctantly.
"There's no time to explain! Just kick the door in, please," Lay pleaded with Xiumin. Although, Xiumin was still confused, he could hear the desperation in Lay's voice as he positioned himself in front of the door. Lay and Luhan took a couple of steps back as Xiumin brought his knee up to his chest. And with one swift and forceful kick, he knocked the door off the hinges. It crashed into the room, slamming against the wall behind it as they rushed into the room.
Lay rushed to the bathroom door, noticing that it was shut as well, but hoping it was not locked as he tried the handle. He cursed under his breath when he realized it was locked as well. "Baekhyun, please unlock the door! Can you do that for me, please," Lay asked, desperately trying to hold onto his sanity. He was also trying his best to keep from breaking down and bursting into tears.
Xiumin positioned himself in front of the door. "Do you want me to kick this door in too," he asked, looking back towards Lay. But Lay knocked on the bathroom door one more time. "Baekhyun, if you're by the door: move. Because he's about to kick it in," he stated, and they waited to hear the shuffling. But they heard no sound from the room. "Baek," Lay shouted through the door. "Please," he cried. Lay, Luhan, and Xiumin all sighed with relief when they heard a heavy thud in the corner of the bathroom, and Xiumin pulled his leg into his chest again.
He released his leg toward the door with a heavy thud, and with a loud thunk the door caved under the force of Xiumin's kick. They all rushed into the bathroom to be met with the sight of Baekhyun barely conscious, arm covered in his own blood- basically smeared everywhere on the floor in that bathroom- razor nowhere to be found.
"I'm sorry," Baekhyun whispered as they all stared at him, horrified by the sight. Xiumin rushed forward before anyone else, clamping his hands down on Baekhyun's forearm. "Get me something that we can tourniquet the bleeding with," he stated, watching as Luhan left in search of something.
"Baekhyun," they heard Chanyeol's voice from the front door as he forgot to close it. He was too panicked and in too much of a hurry to care about shutting a fucking door. But as his friends filed into the room- Chen closing the door- nobody was prepared for the scene that was headed their way.
Lay and Xiumin came out of Baekhyun's room with Baekhyun's arms slung over their necks as they helped him wobble his way out of the bathroom. From somewhere off his body, blood dripped, leaving a trail behind them as they made their way to Chanyeol's couch. Chanyeol continued on into Baekhyun's room- toward the bathroom- the look of utter horror that crossed his face surprised his friends as he rushed back out. "Where is he bleeding from," Chanyeol asked, panic evident in his voice.
Baekhyun looked frightfully pale as they held out his wrist to him, blood still copiously dripping from the laceration. Chanyeol's expression showed he was furious, and his friends stared down in utter shock. "Why'd he do it," Chanyeol asked, staring at Baekhyun's hazy eyes. "Don't you dare fucking die on me, do you understand me," he yelled, shaking Baekhyun violently.
Luhan ran back up to Xiumin with a long rope trailing behind him, hoping it would help. "Is this okay," he asked, handing it over to Xiumin. Xiumin took the rope, and wrapped it around Baekhyun's forearm tightly- knotting it as well. "We either need to get him to the hospital or stitch it up. He'll bleed to death if we don't," Xiumin stated, worriedly.
Lay looked at Chanyeol, pulling him back from Baekhyun. "As to why he did it, I don't know. He does get picked on a lot, it could have been that," Lay stated, trying to coax Baekhyun into talking to him again.
Kris and Sehun looked down- ashamed of their previous statements that morning. They didn't mean to hurt the kid's feelings that bad. They didn't want him to hurt himself because of something they said out of humor. They were trying to be funny, not kill the kid's self-esteem to where he found it better to kill himself rather than live life.
Chanyeol stood, rushing to find his first aid kit as he desperately searched. He couldn't remember where he placed it last night, but he wasn't going to let Baekhyun die either.
Lay was still coddling Baekhyun's head, whispering quietly into his ear as he continuously brushed his hand through Baekhyun's hair. "Please, Baek. Talk to me. Tell me what's bothering you. I'm your best friend; you can share your feelings with me. I promise you we're here to help you, not tease you," he stated, gently brushing Baekhyun's hair from his eyes- that were now unfocused. He was staring at no one in particular or nothing in particular as he struggled to breathe. "I'm sorry," he whispered again, tears rolling down his face. "I don't mean to be like this," he stated, making everyone feel terrible. No one knew how much he was suffering inside, and no one would ever fully be able to understand what he was going through. No one knew he had this mental illness, and it wasn't like he wanted to share that with the world either.
"Just let me die," he whispered softly, his body being wracked by violent sobs as Lay stared at him, hurt. "I will not. I want you to live. You have been my best friend since we were small children. Do you honestly think I'm just going to letyou die," he asked, crying himself. Baekhyun just didn't realize how much he'd hurt Lay's feeling right then and there with such a small phrase.
Chanyeol finally found his first aid kit again- hidden under the sink- he rushed back toward Baekhyun lying on the couch. Everyone could tell Baekhyun wasn't really fighting for his life as he lay there, staring up at the ceiling. "I'm sorry. I can't change who I am on the inside or how I was born. I try to make a difference, but it never works-" he was cut short as his head rolled lazily in Lay's arms.
"Baek," he asked, shocked. "Baek! Baekhyun," he called, but Baekhyun was unresponsive to everything going on around him- his eyes blank. "Baekhyun," Lay screamed as Chen rushed around to pull Lay away from Baekhyun's limp body. Lay nuzzled into Chen's neck, hiding his face as he sobbed heavily, body wracked with sobs as Chen tried his best to hug and comfort him. Chanyeol got down on his knees, placing the first aid kit by the couch as he turned Baekhyun's face to him. Pinching the bridge of Baekhyun's nose, everyone in that room, watched as Chanyeol placed his lips to Baekhyun's- giving him CPR. Dara was not pleased as she watched her fiancé give CPR to another man, but it wasn't like she could even argue right now. The kid was dying and needed to be saved.
After several minutes of compressing his chest and blowing oxygen into his lungs, Baekhyun's chest heaved heavily as he inhaled deeply- gasping as he finally became responsive again. His lips felt as if they were on fire- electrifying every sense in his body as he stared up at Chanyeol. He was already so grateful to him, and he here was, saving Baekhyun once again. Baekhyun couldn't help what he felt as his heart beat rapidly in his chest, but he was pretty sure that was just because he was so close to dying just moments ago.
Everyone around let the breath they'd been holding out in a sigh of relief as Chanyeol then began to prepare the needle and wire- surgical suture. He was going to stitch Baekhyun back up rather than let him die on the way to the hospital to get stitches. Chanyeol sighed as he threaded the needle with the suture, diligent and nimble hands, working hard to keep Baekhyun alive.
After several long and excruciating hours, Chanyeol had Baekhyun stitched up, but now, he was going to need a blood transfusion or some iron. Any way to build the blood he'd lost back up to what it once was. He watched Baekhyun's hand as it shook uncontrollably from the loss of iron. "Now, why'd you do it," he asked, seriously as he stared Baekhyun down. Baekhyun stared up into Chanyeol's eyes, tears cresting down his face again. "I'm so sorry," he whispered, and that was the only answer Chanyeol was going to get.