Rokudaime
Chapter Nineteen
Same Old Love
Take away your things and go
You can't take back what you said, I know
I've heard it all before, at least a million times
I'm not one to forget, you know
This was the worst part of loving someone else was the heartache that came with the territory. That constant throbbing pain, resonating within her chest at the thought of him. The memories were the second worst part, and drinking her sorrows away only made the memories that much more vivid and painful. She was on the brink of breaking down, but something inside her kept her together.
Haruno Sakura was wallowing in her broken heart, and the only thing comforting her tonight was a cold, dark bottle of Hennessy. She cradled the nearly emptied bottle close to her bosom, where her heart was breaking into million of pieces. At least, that's what it felt like to the Hokage. This feeling, burrowing deep inside her chest was far worst than the pain she had felt five years ago when Neji first left. By avoiding Neji, she had inadvertently numbed herself of her feelings for him, and with his return back to the village those feelings that she suppressed, like a dam, just burst.
I don't believe, I don't believe it
You left in peace, left me in pieces
Too hard to breathe, I'm on my knees
Right now, 'ow
What infuriated Sakura the most was the fact that he was whole, and at peace with himself internally. He wasn't suffering with this inner turmoil over her. He wasn't heart broken like she currently was right now. That fact alone pissed her off. She hated feeling like this. She hated feeling so weak and alone.
The Hokage took a long swing from the bottle, and finished off the remaining dark liquor inside of it. The hot, burning sensation that the liquor offered traveled down her esophagus smoothly, momentarily distracting her from her misery. She placed the bottle down rather clumsily, next to the other two emptied bottles of Hennessy she drowned earlier this evening. Her vision was a blur and filled with shadows in her drunkenness.
Her condo was covered in total darkness, save for the silver of moonlight shining in through the blinds. Sakura felt sick to her stomach, and she refused to save herself from this self inflicted, emotional maelstrom. She was capable of being a heavy drinker, but she often limited herself in self discipline, and to set a good example for the younger generation of shinobi who looked up to her.
Tonight, was different, she let go of all inhibition and she drank until she could forget about today, about him, and about his love child with another woman.
Sakura laughed to herself for her failed plan, and she rolled over onto the floor as her hysterical self pitying laughter filled the emptied condo. At least, she thought it had been emptied until the lights to the living room were turned on.
Sakura winced at the blinding light assaulting her now sensitive eyes, and she brought her arm up to shield her eyes as they very slowly adjusted to the brighter scenery. Her vision swam before her, and Sakura had to squint her eyes and put forth an effort to see who dared disrupt her moment. It was true what they said about misery loving company, but Sakura preferred to be alone in her misery, because it was what she deserved. She was going to be alone for the rest of her life now, so she needed to come to terms with that fact. None of her friends should have that burden thrown on them.
"Sakura-chan?"
I'm so sick of that same old love, that shit, it tears me up
I'm so sick of that same old love, my body's had enough
Oh, (that same old love) [2x]
The drunken woman couldn't identify the person calling her name with concern, but a part of her realized that she knew who the person was. She just couldn't put her finger on it, and her ears picked up muffled foot steps heading her way. A part of her felt as if she should be alarmed because a random stranger was inside her house, but then again there was the feeling of familiarity as well. She knew the person wouldn't hurt her. It was the opposite, really. This person loved her unconditionally despite her many flaws.
The tall and blurred out figure closed the front door, and made their way over to the woman sprawled out on the living room floor. Confusion and concerned filtered across his face, but he quickly understood why he was called in so urgently. He's seen her in this similar state before, but this was far more disturbing to see this time around. She hit rock bottom, again.
The stench of liquor was prominent in the condo, and on his distraught Hokage, and the state of her condo was a wreck from the many things she's broken in her fit. It was a good think Toushiro was out on a mission, and not here to witness this chaotic mess.
"Sakura-chan, are you alright?" The voice asked, his voiced perturbed, as he crouched down besides her slowly. His soulful eyes were filled with pity and pain at her condition. Granted, she put herself in this situation, but the reason behind it left him somewhat clueless and helpless.
All he knew was that he had to help her. Her guards were promptly yelled at by her when they tried to check in on her earlier. She threaten to fire anyone if they kept interrupting her, and they feared they might exacerbate her fury. That's when Shikamaru contacted him in an effort to try and reel her in, get her back to her senses. She wouldn't listen to anybody else, but she would listen to him. Sakura always listened to him.
Of course, this was all to be kept on the down low. It wouldn't do well for publicity if the news outlets caught wind of a drunken and unruly Sakura. It didn't help that Sakura had an important TV interview tomorrow morning.
I'm so sick of that same old love, feels like I've blown apart
I'm so sick of that same old love, the kind that breaks your heart
Oh, (that same old love) [2x]
I'm not spending any time, wasting tonight on you
I know, I've heard it all
So don't you try and change your mind
Cause I won't be changing too, you know
Sakura groaned in response, and kicked out her leg to stretch over her rug. The motion caused shattered glass to scattered against one another. The noise made her guardian wince slightly, off-guard.
"No..." She managed to mutter out. Her eyes were shut against the light, having given up earlier in adjusting to the sudden brightness. This made her eyes feel better, and it brought about a sudden drowsiness in her body. She was incredibly tired, and exceedingly drunk. All she wanted to do now was fall asleep, and it helped that someone she trusted was here now, too.
"How about we put you to bed. Come on." The voice urged gently, and Sakura felt her body being lifted from the floor and into warm, comforting arms. Her face rested against the crook of his warm neck, and she caught a whiff of his scent. She buried her nose further into it, and realized the person was Naruto, her best friend.
That revelation alone brought tears to her eyes, and she slowly brought her arms to hug him around his neck. She allowed herself to cry out her pain now that she felt safe to do so. Naruto wouldn't judge her. Naruto wouldn't leave her. Naruto wouldn't ever stop loving her.
"I'm a terrible person, Naruto." Sakura muttered out against his ear, and the blonde shinobi frowned slightly at the confession. Despite her overly slurred speech, Naruto understood her.
"I don't believe that, Sakura-chan, and neither should you. You may be a lot of things, but terrible isn't one of them. I'm not really sure what made you drink this much, but I know it isn't worth it. You're better than this." He scolded her lightly as he kicked open the bedroom door and laid her gently on to her bed. He proceeded to take off her heel shoes, and changed her clothes into something more comfortable; a simple night gown he found in her top draw.
The last time he had to do this for her was five years ago, but instead of prying into Sakura's business he kept silent. This time around he needed to know why. She wasn't going to pretend this never happened, not again.
His sapphire irises stared at her softly from his position by her dresser. She was curled up like a ball, her eyes sealed shut with tears running down her cheeks, and onto her pillow. The sight honestly hurt him. He took a seat on the edge of the bed and held her hand.
Even he knew she had to cry it out in order to feel better from whatever it was that was ailing her heart. Shikamaru assumed it was because of Tsunade, but Naruto knew the Nara was holding back some more vital information. Her death anniversary was approaching soon, and Sakura had celebrated yet another birthday without the busty woman in her life.
"Why does love have to hurt so much?"
You can't believe, still can't believe it
You left in peace, left me in pieces
Too hard to breathe, I'm on my knees
Right now, 'ow
Naruto was taken by surprise at Sakura's sudden question, and her seeking eyes now staring at him with tears lining her vision. He was stunned. He didn't know what to say at the moment. He's had a lot of loss in his life, but the biggest loss of all that really hit home for the blonde was the death of Tsunade. The old hag was like a relative to him.
"I like to think that love is worth the pain, don't you agree? You can't have one without the other. Love makes the pain bearable in some cases." He countered evenly, and his voice was hushed in an effort to maintain a calm, and relaxing environment for the distraught Sakura. The two of them were thinking about two completely different things. Sakura was asking about love in regards to Neji, while Naruto assumed it was about the loss of Tsunade.
She remained silent for several moments before sighing in tiredness. Her eyes closed softly as if she had come up with an opinion, too.
"I guess you're right..." She shared.
"I'm just sick of that same old love constantly hurting me." She whispered out sadly, and her body relaxed to the point she fell fast asleep with her hand still holding onto Naruto's, like a lifeline.
"Don't leave, okay." She told him, and from the tone of her voice it was an order.
Naruto stared at her in astonishment, his sapphire irises gleaming brightly against the moon light.
I'm so sick of that same old love, that shit, it tears me up
I'm so sick of that same old love, my body's had enough
Oh, (that same old love) [4x]
I'm so sick of that same old love, feels like I've blown apart
I'm so sick of that same old love, the kind that breaks your heart
Oh, (that same old love) [4x]
A/N: Hehe, another update! A very short, but deep chapter about Sakura's heart break since the time skip. I used Selena Gomez's Same Old Love for the lyrics. I love that song, and thought it fit perfectly with what Sakura is currently going through. I believe this is my first time incorporating a song into a chapter, let me know how you guys like it?
I was listening to the song while I wrote this piece, so feel free to listen to the song while reading this chapter to get a better feel for Sakura's pain.
Next chapter, you will all be meeting Neji's child and Sakura's reaction to him/her. You can leave a preference on the gender, if you'll like in the reviews. Majority will win, of course lol!
Read and Review
Lady Manami
P.S: Thank you all for the reviews in the previous chapter! They were so heart warming and encouraging. I promise to keep up the good work for you all!
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or the lyrics used in this chapter.