A/N: This is the next instalment, I will admit that I wrote half of this while I was drunk. I haven't got a beta, so I apologise for any mistakes.
Thank you for your reviews! They inspire me to write more and I was extremely moved by Eos Blaze 0402 comment.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters, they all belong to the writers and creators of The Vampire Diaries and The Originals.
Forever and Always
Part 3 - Life Without You
From the moment that the curse took effect, Elijah had been ridden with guilt. Even if it wasn't his fault, he would be causing her pain. He had never wanted to leave her alone, especially for an undetermined amount of time. He didn't have a choice. The witches had placed the curse without hesitation. His time was limited and he would be damned if he spent it anywhere other than by Elena's side.
She had read him like an open book. His last moments being of their magical nuptials. It would forever be ingrained in his mind. He had never felt so much happiness in his thousand years of walking the earth. Yet this woman made him feel everything in the last decade.
He never wanted to say goodbye to her. He hated it when she cried. Elijah was always the one to understand her and give her exactly what she needed, though this was something he couldn't promise her. The cards had been dealt and now he had to live with the guilt, as she had to live without him.
~Life Without You~
Didn't want to say goodbye
Didn't want to see you cry
And look what I have done
~Life Without You~
It wasn't death. It wasn't a slumber either. When Elijah had been daggered he could dream and be in a mindless loop of memories. But what he was enduring was torture. He was tethered to his one true love, forever by her side and yet she saw nothing. He was invisible, a ghost, a mere shadow of his true self.
She was hurting and it was all because of him. He should have been more careful. He should have known that the request of the witches seemed strange. The gut feeling that something was wrong should have alerted him. Now he had to watch as Elena became the very thing that she never wanted to be.
Elijah watched as Elena took a life, and then another. With blood on her hands, he worried that she would lose her compassion. He didn't fail to notice her restlessness at night, he could feel her pain and was beginning to believe that Elena Mikaelson was a goddess in disguise. She fought through the void his absence left and let blood spill in honor of his name, yet she still held on to her humanity.
He was the master of control and even without his presence she was still herself. She was still the woman that he fell in love with.
~Life Without You~
Didn't want to make a mess
Broke your heart and I confess
I'm the guilty one
~Life Without You~
Day and night Elijah would watch her. He never tired, he guessed that this was the consequence of the spell. To witness everyone and everything around you move forward as he stayed in limbo. He was grateful for the moments that he got to hear her speak to him. Her soft whispers when she uttered his name made the nothingness around him seem clearer somehow.
He waited for the moments when she talked to him. He could almost feel her breath on his skin, even though it would never reach. He was forever behind an invisible barrier until they found a way to break the curse.
It never matter what she said. Her actions were enough and when he returned, he was never leaving her again.
~Life Without You~
How I need to hear you
Hear you so softly
Hear you say anything
~Life Without You~
He never wanted to see her cry, even after five years and watching her push forward in her mission to bring him back, Elena had never cried like she did when saying her goodbye. It almost broke him in two to see her so torn. Screaming and shouting that he understood, his presence unknown but his thoughts were crystal clear. He wanted her to go, even if it was to find a little happiness without him.
Elijah had never been more proud of her in that moment. Her soul was so bright and full of compassion, he was lucky to even share an ounce of it with her. Elena Gilbert had been a magical entity, she had lost so much in a short amount of time, her experience and kindness had led her to a decision he himself would tell her to do.
He was always with her, supporting her from the beyond. He could have just been lost in memories, but he chose to walk beside her. He unknowingly placed a hand on her shoulder when she drank too much, or stroked her cheek when she slept. He was forever by her side, but she would never know, not yet.
~Life Without You~
Every single tear you shed
Well it kills me
Oh, she'll never see
~Life Without You~
She had moved to a small place in Georgia. Eliza was still young and Elena wanted more than anything to give the little girl a normal life. She deserved the good education and the list of boyfriends, then later marriage and kids. Elena wanted that for her. The doppelganger couldn't have that normalcy, but she could give it to this child.
Elijah watched as the pair had grown closer, the child didn't even mind that she had been taken from her home and her mother. If anything the bond that the two shared was a mother-daughter relationship. Elena may not of brought a child into this world, but she was certainly shining when Eliza returned from school with report cards.
The curse was starting to become a blessing, Elijah was witnessing everything. He wasn't missing a moment and for that he was thankful. He could only wonder what it would be like if everything was just darkness, an eternal sleep. The thought alone made him shudder.
He missed her. This is the life that Elena had made for herself and Elijah was present for all of it. He had come to terms that he wouldn't be with her yet. He had lived a millennium, what was one lifetime to him on the larger scale. He was a vampire after all. He was alone and yet all at once he felt closer to Elena more than ever.
All he had ever wanted was for her to be happy and she was. A child to watch grow and protect just like a mother would and an uncomplicated life...without him. He would have loved to share all these moments with her, but he had to live with the fact that he couldn't.
~Life Without You~
Oh, this is life without you
I'm learning how to miss you
I guess I need to know how it feels like
This is life without you
I don't know who to turn to
And everything I've known is said is goodbye
So goodbye
This is life without you
This is life without you
~Life Without You~
It was another moment that he didn't dare miss. Elena was cheering as Eliza graduated high school. Diploma in hand and a smile on her face, she ran up to her mother and gave her a crushing hug. The happiness on his wife's face made this torture bearable.
Their were no shortcuts, Elena had started writing and even publish a couple of books under a different name. She wanted to lay low so Elena Gilbert and Eliza Laurent were now known as the Elliot's. Elijah had smiled at the reference to his name, it wasn't a direct connection, but he was honored nonetheless.
Elijah could tell that he was in her mind every moment. Everything she did or was going to do was like she mentally asked herself 'What would Elijah do'. He couldn't count the number of times that he heard her ask him at night for his guidance. Sometimes she found the answer minutes later and other times even he didn't know the answer.
He hadn't seen his siblings in just over a decade. His soul was bound to Elena and that was where he remained. He couldn't leave to check on them and he understood why she had stayed away, but he couldn't help but miss them. Instead he had watched the little brunette so full of life take a shine to dancing. Elena had enrolled her in some classes and she hadn't stopped since. Eliza took part in school plays, she was a talented young girl and she grew into a beautiful young woman with so much to look forward too.
~Life Without You~
Didn't want to make a mess
Didn't want to feel again
This heart has had enough
~Life Without You~
The eldest 'living' original had not been scared of much, but he was worried about returning. It wouldn't happen yet, but the fact that so much time would have passed is what made all the difference. Elena was the same and yet at the same time, different...wiser. The earth still moved and time still continued even if he didn't. He was alone with no one to hear him, it was just silence on his side. He could beg and cry and no one would notice. He wasn't home, because home was with Elena and right now, she didn't know that he co-existed with her.
Her life was moving forward. Elena had brought a second hand car for Eliza to use. The teenager didn't complain especially since she was heading to college in it. Getting accepted into a prestigious dance school, Elena had to let her go. Although Elena had moved with her, due to Elena's vampirism she had to relocate closer so others wouldn't noticed her unchanging face.
It was actually like a fairy-tale. Elena had been introduced to Eliza's first serious boyfriend when she was 21. He actually turned out to be a witch. The supernatural always found itself seeking familiar waters. Although Eliza was a witch, it was ancestral magic. Something that she had been separated from for a long time.
At first the young man, Thomas Carson had been wary of the fact that Elena was a vampire, they were natural enemies after all. But he soon came to the conclusion that she meant well. Thomas could see the love that shone between the women and he wouldn't come between that.
~Life Without You~
Desperate hurting all alone
Called the house that isn't home
I'm afraid to pick it up
~Life Without You~
Three years later...things had changed drastically. Eliza had graduated from College and was in the process of finalizing her wedding arrangements. Her first serious boyfriend had turned out to be the man of her dreams and Elena couldn't be happier. Elijah watched on as Elena helped to support her daughter plan the biggest moment of her life, even if they couldn't see the him, he was privileged to witness such a life changing event. It was so normal and human.
The original had been by their side for decades now. He knew them so well and enjoyed the nights where they sat watching television and gossiped to each other like school girls. It wasn't anything interesting, but seeing the love of his life laughing hysterically made him smile.
Although he wished to be there, it probably wouldn't be the same. Nothing Elena did surprised him anymore, he could easily predict her reactions just by her facial expressions. He hope that when he awakened that he would remember every detail, he didn't want to forget. It was both the great and worst experience of his immortal life.
Elijah was certain that if he had to endure this any other way, he would have lost his mind. He still wasn't sure if he had or not. Could this life he followed all be a dream that he imagined as he slumbered in a basement? Was it real?
It had to be. His Elena was too real to be a dream. His memory was as vivid and detailed as the real thing and surely his siblings would make an entrance quite often. Doubt flooded him, but the light in the end was her. She kept him sane. Elena Gilbert made this veiled life worth it. He would take any part of her he could get, even if it meant his physical absence.
~Life Without You~
All I want is someone
To tell me I'm crazy
It just might save me
~Life Without You~
The invisible tether that held the noble Mikaelson close to the brunette was a blessing on a special day. He never had the pleasure of meeting her. Eliza the little girl tied to his own immortal life, she was to walk down the aisle and marry the man she loved. She had grown into such a smart, beautiful woman that reminded him so much of Elena. His wife was clearly meant for motherhood, Eliza was proof of that.
Even if he had no part in the upbringing of this young woman, Elijah felt like he had. His family values had been ingrained in her mind by Elena. She matched Elena's compassion, offering her life for his and as expected Elena had declined. Eliza had found several items belonging to him and her curious mind wouldn't let it go until Elena had sighed and told her the truth. She was old enough to know, but made sure to clarify that she was in no danger from her. Elena wanted her to live a full life, which she was.
Eliza had taken her first steps down the aisle with Elena by her side. He expected nothing less. A father figure or male figure in fact was never in their lives. Elena filled the role of both and Eliza never minded.
The most memorable moment for the noble one was when the bride and groom kissed, which resulted with his Elena having the most beautiful smile gracing her face. He was so happy to see her in such a way that the emotion overwhelmed him. Reaching out to nothing but air as she stood mere inches away from him. He needed her and she needed him, he could tell by the way she wrapped her arms around herself. It was far from perfect but it was the closest that they were going to get...for now.
~Life Without You~
Oh, all I need is someone
Right here beside me
Oh, now I can see
~Life Without You~
Everyone was happy. Eliza had her friends attend the wedding, it wasn't very big but all the important people in her life were there. Thomas on the other hand had his family, friends and fellow witches that Elijah could only assume were part of his coven.
The Carson's were well known for their Spiritual Magic. Guided by their ancestors that allowed the coven to draw power from their family line, it was that connection that made them extremely powerful. Elena had only met Thomas and his parents a few times and it was more for Eliza's benefit. They were polite and cordial, but Elena could always sense the elephant in the room, her vampirism.
She never asked them for magical help or advice. To them she was simply Eliza's mother who happened to be a vampire as well. But it seemed that things had changed now that Eliza was part of their family.
It happened while Elena was dancing with Eliza for their mother/daughter dance. The Carson coven circled them, including Thomas and his parents Annette and Joseph. Their movements were slow as they began surrounded the duo on the dance floor. Their eyes were open and heads tilted backwards, their arms were outstretched enough to lay their hands against another members.
Elena and Eliza could only turn within the circle and watch as the witches chanting got louder. It was fascinating to watch, but worrisome at the same time. Elena gripped her daughters hand tight, trying to give comfort even if she didn't feel any herself. When the voices became softer, it was then that Elena noticed a shadow standing in the circle with her and Eliza.
~Life Without You~
Oh, this is life without you
Learning how to miss you
I guess I need to know how it feels like
Oh, this is life without you
I don't know who to turn to
Everything I've known is said is goodbye
So goodbye
Oh, this is life without you
~Life Without You~
Elijah didn't know what was happening, the language in which they chanted was unknown to him. All he did know was that they meant no harm to the two important people in the middle. He had seen the love that Thomas held for Eliza, it was how he felt toward Elena, and if they were anything alike he wouldn't harm a single hair on Eliza's head. And he was right.
It all happened so quickly, one minute he was watching Elena dance and the next the witches had them trapped. The look of worry tore at his heart, but that wasn't the only thing that he felt. In an instant he felt as though he could breathe. The heaviness that usually donned his chest had disappeared. He could feel the burning around his ring finger. Without thought he had whispered 'Elena' in panic as nothing like this had happened before.
He turned around the instant he heard her gasp, terrified that she was hurt. Like many times before he approached the woman that held his heart and caressed her cheek, even if she would never be able to feel his touch. The instant his hand met her skin and for the first time in decades he felt her soft skin did he let the tears fall. He was real. He wasn't a ghost and she could finally know that he was there, he had always been there.
Elena didn't hesitate and threw her arms around him in shock and disbelief. He was real and it was taking a moment to sink in. Elijah's response was instantaneous, his arms wrapped around her waist and he held her close as though he would disappear any second. He could hear her soft sobs as she buried her face in to his neck. It was perfect and all he could do was close his eyes and commit this memory, while he held her tight.
~Life Without You~
Oh, this is life without you
Learning how to miss you
I guess I need to know how it feels like
Oh, this is life without you
I don't know who to turn to
Everything I've known is said is goodbye,
So goodbye
This is life without you
This is life without you
~Life Without You~
The Carson coven had spoken to their ancestors on Thomas' request. He had heard from Eliza the fairy-tale of Elena's love story and the tragic ending. For a vampire Elena was far from heartless, putting aside the love for her husband to raise a child as her own and protect her. After much consulting it was agreed that they would give Elena and Eliza this gift. It wasn't permanent, but they could grant a few hours for a reunion.
Elena had kissed him was the tears had dried, she mumbled against his lips. It almost became a chant of 'I'm sorry' over and over again. She pulled away from him, the stray tears falling down her cheek as her voice cracked.
"I'm so sorry Elijah...I couldn't...I...I had to...I couldn't take the life of a child to bring you back." Elena was broken, she didn't want to see the disappointment or anger from Elijah. She had always hoped that he would understand, but now that he was here, the certainty had vanished.
"I know lovely Elena...I know" Elijah smiled gently, while cupping his wife's face. He was taking in her beauty and this time she knew he was doing it. Elena relaxed at his assurance and when she went to speak again, Elijah beat her to it.
"I would never have asked you to take that life. I have been by your side every single moment, watching...waiting. And I will wait lifetimes more if it means that you keep your compassion. I will always love you Elena, we have forever. Knowing you are mine is what keeps me alive." His eyes glistened as his words spoke nothing but the truth. He watched as an array of emotions crossed Elena's face, but one stood out and it was love, love for him.
"I missed you Elijah and I love you..so much." Elena had a beaming smile on her face as she stared back at Elijah. She kissed his lips and then peppered more kissed on to his face, she chuckled when he laughed.
She grabbed a hand out to Eliza, pulling her into the fold. The young woman needed to meet the man that completed her. Her family was finally together, even if it was only for tonight.
"Eliza meet Elijah, Elijah meet Eliza...our daughter" She took a step back to witness their interaction and was quite surprised when Eliza chucked proper etiquette out of the window and threw herself into the arms of the original.
"It's so nice to meet you! She talks about you all the time and I know she misses you. I wish...I wish I could do something help..." Eliza's enthusiasm calmed as she thought about the major factor in breaking the link. She'd have to die. The young woman who was so like her mother, wanted to grant him that wish, wanted her mother happy, but she'd have to leave her. Shew as conflicted, but as soon as the thoughts crossed her mind, she was interrupted.
"I have watched you since you were a baby. You are helping by just being you. You're both happy and that is all I have wanted for you two. We may never get to meet again, but you must know that I have loved you since your mother took you in. Although you didn't have a father figure, you have always been my daughter. She is my entire exist and you are hers. So live your life...I will always be there." Elijah's words would melt anyone's heart, his voice soft and the honesty shone through.
Eliza could do nothing, but stand in awe of the man in front of her. She would be proud to call him 'Dad'. She could see why her mother was so in love with him. Eliza was pretty sure that everyone else had felt the truth in his words and they would be forever with her.
Some time had passed and Elijah had managed to have a few dances with his wife. The DJ had even done a father/daughter dance and then the three spent the time talking as a family. For those few hours everything was perfect. But perfect couldn't last forever.
It was that time to say goodbye...again. It was painful for it to happen a second time, but they were blessed to even be given this chance. Whispers of adoration and love were passed between parted lovers. Kisses lingered and memorized, while promises were made of him returning. They would find a way, a way that didn't involve the death of a young woman he had grown to love.
The heaviness had returned and the feeling of loneliness had comeback, but at least this time they knew he was forever present. He would witness more lifetime events and they would know that he was also there.
Forever waiting...
Forever wanting...
This was his life...Elijah's life without them...at least for now.