Well, here's chapter three. Um, I can't remember the last time I updated, but it seems like it was kind of a while ago. Still hope you all enjoy!
I walked to the large room where my father and brother were waiting for me, a malicious grin gracing my face. I was still quite uncertain as to what type of conversation would ensue among the three of us, but I doubted that it would be pleasant, and the thought of us throwing spiteful insults across the room at one another excited me in a way no ten-year-old should have to experience. Perhaps there would even be a physical fight … and flames. Then, I realized, I would have the chance to flaunt my newly learned ability; the potential to produce blue fire.
"Good morning, Fire Lord Ozai," I greeted my father as I bowed low, clutching my left fist with my right hand. Determined to show him the utmost respect and therefore surpass my brother in all ways possible, I bowed lower than I normally did and stayed there for but a second or two longer. It wasn't my desire to have my father suddenly decide that Zuko did not need to be banished, though I doubted that he would change his mind, and I concluded that by displaying my perfection it would effectively lower my brother's reputation in my father's eyes.
Slowly standing back up, I opened my eyes after having closed them in a respectful manner, only to have my gaze fall upon my brother Zuko and Uncle Iroh after quickly looking at my father. A scowl involuntarily swept across my face, for I did not realize that my uncle would be at this meeting as well. Upon seeing him my stomach lurched and for a second I once again felt as though I might throw up.
"Daughter," my father began in his voice that seemed to reek of fear-instilling authority, "your brother is leaving today. He is never to return to the Fire Nation…"
"Yes, Father," I replied, implying that I knew this was to happen. I paused waiting for him to continue.
"…until he has brought back to me the Avatar."
My face widened with a smile that was impossible to contain, for I knew what this meant. "Yes, Father." I said once again. I could feel my uncle's eyes penetrating my very being, but I refused to let him get the better of me. As I grew older and more hateful with the years, he began to act as a harping and constantly whispering conscience, as my own had become nonexistent within me. This only succeeded in bothering me, and spurned me on to performing even more ruthless and spiteful acts than I had before he became so bent on changing me for the better.
"Ozai," I heard my uncle say. "You know the Avatar has been missing for one hundred years! You cannot expect your son --"
"Silence! I am the Fire Lord and all obey me!" My father had released some of his rage upon my uncle with the harsh words he chose to speak. I became like a sponge, soaking in all my father said and did, hoping to learn from observing him and his ways. Perfection, I knew, was what was expected of me, and no less.
"My son is disrespectful, arrogant, and cocky. A fool! He will learn to submit to those who have authority over him, and this is the way I have chosen for him." My father paused, his eyes narrowing with a haunting stare that would have sent any normal person into a fit of panic, but my uncle stood firm, waiting for his brother to continue. "If you wish to question my authority, brother, perhaps you should accompany my son on his quest and learn some respect yourself!"
My uncle Iroh, as much as I hated to admit to myself, was a strong man. He knew what he wanted out of life and he knew how to acquire it. But he was also aware of what he needed out of life, which was completely different from what he wanted. I believe as well, that, in a way, he also knew what he needed to give back to life itself.
"I will accompany Prince Zuko on his quest for the Avatar, as futile as it might be. But realize, my brother, that the tree does not create shade for the wandering traveler because man ordered it to." Those being his final words, the very last words I heard him say for a long time, my uncle turned to leave the great room, my brother Zuko following him like a lost animal that follows the first thing that shows it the least bit of kindness.
"Azula," I heard my father say after he calmed himself from his brother's comment and actions. "Show me what you know. Give me a demonstration." He leaned back in his throne, making himself comfortable, and I could tell that he needed to gaze upon my expertise and perfection in order to refresh himself. My brother and uncle had drained him of all pride, and soiled the halls of his palace with their disrespect. I would have to restore the sacred aura of this great room by a display of my ability.
"Yes, Father," I said, bowing low and backing away in order to properly distance myself to perform one of my techniques. Breathing in deeply, I concentrated on focusing my rage at one point in my body, and then extending it to my fingertips. Practically shaking with the power I felt coursing through myself, I began kicking and punching at imaginary foes, embellishing the performance with fire at the proper times, and even going so far as to dodge the blows from my enemies that existed only in my mind. And although I knew that no one was there, in my mind's eye it became apparent that the ones I had chosen to fight were in actuality Uncle Iroh and Zuko.
Realizing that it would become necessary to end the demonstration with an impressive display of skill, I decided that the time to show my father the blue flames I could produce was now. Focusing every ounce of anger I had in my body, I brought forth red and orange flames, circling them around my body in an impressive display of light and heat. I then crushed the rage together in my body, imagining it as a source of energy, pent up and ready to explode. After forcing it to stay in a container entirely too small for it, my body, I then allowed the energy of the rage to be released into my flames; the fire burst into a magnificent show of light blue as it continued to circle my body for a split second afterwards. Then, almost as quickly as I brought it forth, I diminished it, and ended the show in a bowing position, leaving my father to process the demonstration in his own mind and judge me accordingly.
"Ten?" was all he asked, his face displaying no emotion, his voice not revealing his thoughts, either.
"Yes, Father," I answered, as was the standard reply in my vocabulary when it came to having a conversation with Fire Lord Ozai. My blue flames, perhaps, impressed him, and he had to be positive that the display of abilities previously laid out before him were indeed performed my a mere ten-year-old.
"Perfect," he said in reply, a smile spreading across his twisted face, a maniacal rage entering his eyes that caused them to dance with villainous pleasure.
Yes, I heard my own voice say to myself within the confines of my mind, I am perfect.
--------------------------------
Later that day, I found myself in the sanctuary of my room, sitting cross-legged on the cold, stone floor, a scowl resting on my face. The birds outside my window filled my ears with the loving chirps of males attempting to attract a female as they flitted about in the most romantic way a bird knew how to. I stared rigidly at the light the sun cast on the floor just in front of me, glancing up every once in a while to observe the particles of dust floating around the room, visible only where the beams of light shone through the window. My own mind, and my room, were in full contrast with the light, airy atmosphere of the natural world outside. A curiosity overtook me, to stand up and pull my chin up to the high sill of the window in order to glance outside and view the world beyond my room. But something held me back. Something inside my mind told me to stay put, remain cross-legged on the floor. Here you are flawless and hold the highest of regards, the voice told me. Don't go out further than what you have been taught. For, by looking out the window and wistfully wishing to run and play like a normal little girl, my conscience told me that I would be weakening. Strength, my heartbeat said. Strength, strength … no room for weakness, no room for emotion. No room for weak links in the chain of divine-ruling Fire Lords and Ladies. No room for people like Zuko.
I feebly held out my hand in front of my face, studying the lines and curves of my fingerprints, paying special attention to my slender fingers. Fingers that produced fire and caused destruction. But destruction is who you are, my mind told me. Destruction is what you've been shaped for.
My expression hardened as I forced my delicate hand into a hardening fist, still not breaking my gaze from it. It was as if a tiny vestige of emotion was left within me, still telling me to look out the window; go outside and play in the sun.
"Go ahead," I mocked it, "Just try and make me do it. I dare you."
At that very second in time, I heard a rapping on my window. Steeling myself for a split second as I involuntarily prepared myself for battle, my mind told me to calm down, and that the noise I heard upon the glass of my window was something to investigate -- not to attack.
Cautiously standing up, I turned myself and look out the window, only to be greeted by the perpetually smiling face of my friend, Ty Lee. Of course, even at the time I would not have necessarily labeled her my friend; she was more like a person whom I spent some time with in order to surpass her. I had found myself doing that lately; putting myself in the presence of others so that I might emulate them. For, although I hated to admit it, Ty Lee was an expert at acrobatics, and as it was in my nature to do so, I wished to be better than her. The influence of my father was once again prevalent in my life in that I kept friends merely for the sake of sharpening my skills.
After observing the fact that Ty Lee was able to reach my window with the aid of a tree, I gently pulled on the handles, opening the window.
"What are you doing here?" I said in a most threatening tone.
"I just wanted to talk with you! And there were so many scary guards at the entrance, I didn't think it would be good to go in that way," she put on an expression that showed how pleased she was with herself. "So I decided to hop a few fences, and climb a few trees -- and here I am!"
"You … wanted to talk?" I said, half not believing her, and half thinking she was idiotic for going through the whole process just to strike up a conversation with me.
"Yes," she said, her frighteningly happy expression changing from that to one of sorrow and pity. "When I heard that Zuko was being banished, well, I thought I should come and help you not be so sad about it."
"Help me not be so sad?" I started, about to go into another fit of rage and explain to her that, on the contrary, I was quite pleased with the outcome of my brother's punishment.
"You sure are asking a lot of questions!" she answered in a high pitched voice. "Yes, of course; if my brother was banished by my father and given a horrible scar to top it off, I'd be feeling pretty sad too. Except," she put on a thoughtful expression, "I don't have a brother."
"Look, Ty Lee," I said, starting to feel exasperated. "I am not sad or upset about my brother's banishment. I am actually happy about it. And, as for his scar, he deserved it, after disrespecting my father that way."
At first Ty Lee looked rather surprised, then a bit frightened at the prospect of hearing her friend say such a cruel thing. Her expression softened, however, and she put on an admiring face. "Wow, Azula. You sure know how to look on the positive side of things. And to think that when I heard about Zuko's banishment, I could only feel sorrow!"
I rose one eyebrow slightly, staring into the visage of my dim-witted friend. "Yes," I said, sarcasm so evident in my voice, it was painful. "Yes, Ty Lee. I am an expert at looking on the bright side."
A silence followed thereafter, and no matter how long I stared at her, my eyes, described by another as a stare that held both the intensity of ice and fire, could not penetrate her happy being, and she stayed, waiting for me to say something. Finally, she broke the silence, swaying ever so slightly in the tree branches, "Well, Azula, it's getting a little uncomfortable sitting in this tree. Why don't you climb down with me and we can go get Mai and do something?"
My gaze at her intensified, although I myself hadn't thought it possible, and she giggled nervously, "Or I could just go…"
"Good idea," I said, somehow managing to keep my voice soft but still have a sharp edge to it. My mouth broke into a slight smile as I watched her struggle to find her footing on the way down the giant tree.
"Uh … a little help, Azula?" I heard Ty Lee's voice cry up from about half way down the tree, and I ran to my window to look down at her pathetic figure. She had somehow managed to get herself tangled up in the tree's branches, and if she moved too much in the wrong direction, it was inevitable that she would go crashing to the ground below.
"You know," I said, casually examining my fingernails. "I don't think it's very proper for a young Fire Nation Princess to go tree climbing, now is it?"
"You know, Azula, I think you're right," she said, starting to sweat, "but I really could use a hand …"
I was about to say something back to her, as I watched her struggle to position herself, when a dark figure came out of nowhere. Standing beneath Ty Lee in the tree, a hoarse voice cried out, "Come on, Ty Lee. Just fall; I'll catch you."
Adjusting my vision to the bright sunlight, I glanced down only to see Mai standing underneath the tree, a bored expression on her face. "If you're wondering, Azula," the girl said plainly, "the only reason I'm here is because there was nothing to do at my house."
I was not given the chance to reply, because Ty Lee, trusting that Mai would catch her, had released her hold on the tree and let gravity do the rest. I watched with delight when I saw that Ty Lee's weight had been a little bit more than Mai had expected, and they both hit the ground hard when the acrobatic girl made contact with Mai.
A venomous laugh escaped my lips, only to be put out by a fierce expression from Mai, shot at me just as swiftly as a knife could be thrown. "You think it's funny, Azula?" she said, standing up as she brushed herself off. "Well, you can sit back and laugh all you want at other people's pain. But you yourself would never be able to stand the kind of pain that someone like Zuko had to go through."
"Zuko?" I said harshly, as my mood did a nose dive. My expression darkened as I listened to Mai continue.
"Yes, Zuko." She said. "Not only did he have to get banished, but he went through the physical pain of being burned by your father!"
I growled fiercely, blue fire almost involuntarily emitting from my fingertips. So engrossed was I in my rage, that I did not even notice that I had brought forth fire without having to actually turn it blue first. Glancing down at my friends, I noticed that their expressions had wavered slightly, and Mai looked like she wanted to take back what she had just said.
"You don't think I can withstand pain?" I barked, climbing up onto my windowsill, looking down at the ground below. For the first time I realized how far away the grass really was from my window, but my expression stood solid. "Just watch."