Beorn did as he had promised. When we left his abode, we were adorned with as much food and as many water skins as we could carry in our packs or on our backs. Those intelligent creatures that waited upon us during our stay were not the only horses in Beorn's possession; he had also many normal steeds of which he granted us fifteen to carry us to the eaves of Mirkwood.
From our hosts earlier warnings I had the strong notion that Mirkwood was like to be our biggest challenge thus far, though I would not impart such pessimism with my fellow companions; they did not need any of my pointless negativity right now.
We rode out before the sun had even properly risen, Thorin not wanting to waste a single moment once we were all of us packed and ready. The air was fresh and free as it pushed past us in our haste. Thorin had set a vigorous pace that all of us struggled to maintain at first, but our horses soon grew accustomed to their expected speed and fell into step with Thorin's easily enough.
The rushing winds made conversation invalid since none could hear a thing that the other said to them, and that did not matter all that much to me; we were passing through vast plains of grasslands that stretched further than I could ever have imagined. The emptiness made me feel both exposed and liberated at the same time; such openness simply did not exist in the Shire, our fields were miniscule in comparison and it was well-known that Hobbits were none too keen on open, exposed spaces – it made them feel vulnerable. I felt safer, such a space made me certain that any ambush would be spotted long before anyone had time to get to us, though if I had been alone I was not sure that I would feel quite so confident about that – it would also mean that no one for leagues would know of an attack should one occur and that would mean no help would come.
All too quickly the forest came into view, creeping closer ominously. It went on for what looked like leagues at either side, I could only imagine how long we would have to travel through such vast territory.
It was only just midday when we reached the eaves of Mirkwood. It was not difficult to see why the woods had such a name. The trees stood tall and proud, but their bark was grey and black, their leaves speckled with mud brown freckles. The Woods fell open like a curtain, framing a dark and dank path with gnarled and tangled branches eager to tear at clothes and flesh alike.
"Before us lies the path of the Elves," Gandalf informed us, "It will not guarantee your safety, but it is the only path that will not destroy you all with its overgrown evil, for the magic of the High Elves of Old still lives upon its trail."
"Could we not simply go around the forest?" Bilbo questioned naïvely.
Gandalf tittered, shaking his head. "Not unless you wish to travel three hundred leagues in that direction," He indicated the left side of the woods, "Or twice that the other way." He explained gesturing to the right.
"Sounds fun," I muttered under my breath. Going into a forest of 'overgrown evil' on a path that was not necessarily entirely safe was not my idea of a good time.
"Yes," Kili intoned, his breath flowing into the shell of my ear, "Sounds delightful."
I giggled quietly.
Gandalf took no notice of us, though I am sure he heard us; he had near Elf-like hearing sometimes. "You shall leave the ponies hear as a show of good will to our friend and former host." He ordered.
"If we must do this to keep an ally, then so it shall be done." Thorin grunted, clearly regretting his promise to return the creatures. In all honesty, I could not see what benefit it would do us to take them with us, surely they would only slow us down; with their hooves getting snarled in twigs and us having to duck branches whilst we sat upon them.
I swung myself down, perhaps not as gracefully as I had intended, for I stumbled a little ways into Fili as he dismounted. He supressed a peel of mirth as he steadied me, possibly because the look I gifted him with plainly said: laugh and die.
I sighed heavily as I shouldered my pack, already it was heavy; the few days of rest combined with the lack of supplies beforehand had left me once more unused to carrying great loads. Sucking in a breath, I prepared to wear this burden for as long as I could; after all, a heavy bag was a full bag and a full bag meant there were plenty of supplies. Around me a few others seemed to stagger slightly under the weight of their possessions which eased my thoughts considerably, however, some held their loads so easily it appeared as though their bags were filled with naught but feathers. Of course, Kili was one of those somewhat infuriatingly annoying people, though I said no such thing to him.
As soon as everyone had dismounted, the animals set off in a hardy trot back the way they had come, their manes flowing faster than seemed proper for their speed, but was beautiful all the same.
"With that done," Gandalf began, it had not gone unnoticed that he had not left the back of his horse and for that Thorin eyed him suspiciously, "I must bid you all a very fond farewell."
"You're leaving?" Bilbo cried incredulously, like the rest of us it seemed the Hobbit did not see a way through this wood without our handy wizard.
Gandalf nodded solemnly, "I am afraid I must, master Baggins," The wizard affirmed. "There is some pressing business to the South to which I must attend."
Thorin's brows were dark clouds above stormy eyes, "You would desert us now? In our hour of need?" He growled, the tempest awoken in his words.
"I wish it were not so, but there are greater needs of my assistance than yours at this time." The old man scolded. "I will, however, return when I am able."
The Dwarf-leader recoiled in outrage, but stayed silent; he knew better than to get on the wrong side of a wizard and the promise of a return muted some of the betrayal inside him.
"Now, I fear it is good bye to you all for a short while," Gandalf announced. "Be good, take care of yourselves – and don't leave the path!" He finished with a pointed look at Fili, Kili and I, evidently the wizard thought us to be the most reckless of our company.
Before any of us could even begin to complain or protest his absence, he gave his horse a firm prod with his toe and was sent hurtling away due south from us. I would never have said so, but the absence of our wizard had already begun to make me feel slightly uneasy and the prospect of entering Mirkwood still did not appeal to me all that much.
"Well then," Thorin called gruffly, "We ought not to stand about."
Fili nodded, "Indeed. The sooner we go in, the sooner we get out." He affirmed. I hoped to the Valar that he would be right.
Once I passed under the very first eaves a cold sickness leeched the very air from my lungs, it was a few moments before I was able to regain some semblance of a normal breathing pattern. The mist clung to the skin, heavy air ripe with misery seeped through to my core. How could anything enjoy living here? Trees swayed despite the lack of any wind at all, in fact the only thing that stirred the air was our own movement. All at once the wood was quiet and yet filled with the whispers of a thousand souls. I hated it and I had not been inside the wood for more than five minutes.
The trees felt too close together, stiff and silent and yet they seemed to shimmer and shuffle on voiceless mutterings. The path was nothing more than a few cobblestones every few steps to keep you in the right direction; for an Elven path I would have expected it to have been something much grander – Elrond's paths would never have been so decaying, of that I was sure. Perhaps the Elves that had forged this path were of a different sort entirely. Whatever they were, I hoped we did not have the pleasure of meeting them.
In going further down the small path, we agreed to travel in threes, there being fifteen of us. I was at the rear with my usual pair. The youngest brothers did their utmost to pretend that they were unaffected by the stuffy closeness of the forest, but the way Kili held onto my hand and how Fili would peek behind him far more than he would anywhere else told me different. There was an uncomfortable vibe in this place and I was certain that the others all felt it too. Amongst the Company, there was no playful banter, no cheerful singing, and no good-natured conversation. Only the sound of our footfalls and the occasional sigh could be heard from us.
Secretly, I was glad of Kili's hand in mine; it steadied me more than any words could have and as soon as he had offered it to me I had clutched it gratefully. There was something comforting in the way that I could feel his heart rate through his palm, strong and calm, that forced me to try and make my own match his.
The deeper we ventured, the more uneasy I felt. There was nothing tangible to blame; it was pitch black almost, but I was not afraid of the dark; the trees determined that we would walk closer together than was normal, but I was not claustrophobic. This place strongly reminded me of the Old Forest, except the Old Forest somehow had a remnant of the Shire's charm about it. This forest was wild and angry.
It was on the second night that something out of the usual happened. By this point we had gone far enough so as to hear the small creatures that littered the forest, though we saw no more of them than their tiny shadows. Their chittering and snuffling was louder than I would have given to their size, and I wondered how they could possibly survive in this place; I had seen no trees that bore anything but mouldering berries and I had yet to spot any water source at all – though through the dense murk of Mirkwood, I was not all too surprised.
We had all unrolled our meagre bedding and were settling down for the night. Thorin was once again on watch; it was as though this strange surrounding made him unable to sleep and even sit comfortably for he always had a twitch of caution in his eyes. I was almost asleep by Kili's side when the leader shook Kili awake and made the gesture of silence with his forefinger pressed to his lips.
"Shh," He whispered to the sleep addled Kili. He looked pointedly to his left.
I followed his gaze to where a rustling disturbed the brush. Before I could even register what it could mean, Kili had reacted decisively. Kili's arrow had stilled the rustler in less time than it had took me to think a bow could be useful. He set down his bow, and I realised he had been sleeping with it above our heads; in easy reach should he need it. I had never seen Kili sleep with his bow so close, it made me wonder when he had decided he needed to protect himself so fiercely; his bow had always been in easy reach, but never so accessible. Perhaps it was the discomfort of this place inhabiting itself in his actions.
Without a word, the youngest Dwarf rose, lightly pressing down on my shoulder when I made to follow and shaking his head. He drew out his knife that hung on his belt, again, something I had not seen him sleep with before. Kili plunged his hand into the brush, his knife ready, and plucked out the offending beast: a small, charcoal-furred critter, something akin to a demonic-looking squirrel.
"We should cook it!" Bombur exclaimed.
By now the rest of the camp had awoken, I do not know whether it was the sound of the arrow or some kind of mutual Dwarven sense of possible danger; or in Bombur's case, the prospect of meat. We had discovered that any meat we brought with us soon went bad in this forest.
The Dwarves went about doing what they did best in times of trouble, they cooked the creature as per Bombur's suggestion. Though the meat smelled pleasant enough once Bofur had seen to it, the colour of the brown flesh did not appeal to me, I insisted that Kili take my share whilst I nibbled of the last portion of my stale bread.
Ori eagerly took a huge mouthful of his share, chewing happily until he happened to taste the meat. He hurriedly spat chunks to the ground spluttering and coughing in an attempt to rid the vile taste from his tongue. Not many others bothered to taste the grisly flesh after that. Even Bombur could not stomach the taste. Maybe Beorn's warning of the animals being dark and not good to eat were correct; this creature seemed harmless enough and yet it certainly was not a palatable food source. We would not be eating meat again until we got to Erebor by the looks of it. That did not faze me too much, for we still had a few rations of vegetables and rice left which should last a day or two more.
It was not so easy to sleep after that. The sound of roiling stomachs was rife about camp and I am certain I heard poor Bilbo retching until the early hours; him having taken nearly as big a bite of his piece of meat as Ori had. Hobbits are seldom made ill by food and so this flesh must have been particularly potent to disagree with Bilbo so much. Once again, I was pleased with my decision to avoid it. Despite Kili's positively green countenance, he feigned immunity to whatever was wrong with the food and insisted that we settle down as we had done.
Laid with my back to his stomach and his arms cradling me, I could feel every roll of his insides as the mouthfuls he had scoffed without tasting lingered within. I felt a little sorry for him, but if he had listened to me when I had declined the foul food he would have been perfectly fine.
Travelling the next morning was slow, laborious business. Those who had dared to try last night's supper were indeed suffering, their mouths were dry and ashen and their spirits considerably lowered.
"Are you certain you are quite right, Kee?" I pestered a still peaky-looking Kili.
He nodded, "Of course," He dismissed, patting my shoulder, "Takes more than a bit of bad grub to stop me."
I giggled, he was clearly bluffing, but I did not call him out on it; he would only have grumbled and that was the last thing I would want, especially in this miserable wood.
He paused slightly, as though caught off guard, I rose my eyebrow in questioning. "It's good," He explained, "To hear you laugh. I forgot how nice it sounded."
I blushed lightly, "Well, it's the first time I've felt like doing anything other than frowning since we entered the forest."
"So it is not only me that has noticed that?" He pondered, "There must be some strange magic over this place."
I bobbed my head, I knew what he meant; there was no natural explanation as to why a forest could possibly feel so unwelcoming. The trees of the Old Forest were nothing compared to those of Mirkwood. According to the Old Took, the trees of the Old Forest were alive because of the Elves that used to live there an Age ago; they spoke to the trees, softly and beautifully, until the first tree spoke back. Perhaps that is what happened here, though the thought sent another shudder through me; if it was Elves once more, then I was right earlier, these Elves were certainly an entirely different breed to the ones I had come across previously. These Elves would be dangerous to cross, I hoped again that we would not cross paths with them.
We all walked in silence as usual. Kili had his bow in hand, as he had ever since the rustler. It worried me a little to see him so on edge, but I suppose we all were. None of us had slept all that much and we were running out of food faster than I thought we would. The close air of the woods made all of us tired and grumpy, I even felt confused – though what about, I could not guess.
It was not all that long before we came across something I had been dreading. A river. Or rather the river. It cut right across our path and dimly, through the dusky light, I could make out the rest of the path on the other side, though that was no use to us; the river was too wide to cross without being in the water and I had a feeling from Beorn's warnings that that would be a horrible idea.
"We need to cross." Thorin asserted, stating the obvious.
"Is that a boat?" Fili asked, squinting into the distance.
Sure enough, there was a small, wooden dingy at the opposite side of the river, still as though it were on land as opposed to water. Looking closely at the river I saw that it was as unmoving as a frozen lake, somehow that unnerved me more than it should have; it seemed unnatural to me for a river not to be flowing.
Ori piped up a suggestion. "I have a rope," He began, "If we had some sort of hook, we could throw it and drag the boat over here."
The Company nodded slowly, it seemed a good idea, and there was just one flaw. "It is an awful long way." I put in, "Is anyone here even able to throw something that far?"
My questions only brought grimaces, it was apparent that no one really thought themselves up to the task. After all, the boat was a good thirty feet away at least.
"I can do it." Came the familiar confidence of the youngest Dwarf, the stubborn effect of the forest disappearing momentarily. "I have thrown things further, have I not, Fili?"
"You have, brother, but this is important." The blond reminded uncertainly.
I had no doubt that, ordinarily, Kili would have been more than able to do as we needed, and yet I feared that the smothering dullness of the wood would somewhat lessen his abilities.
Thorin handed Kili a small axe that had been tied to the end of the rope, "You can try, young one, but do not expect to succeed."
Great. Now Kili was bound to doubt himself. I placed a hand on his shoulder and gave a gentle squeeze. "You can do it." I whispered in his ear, gifting him with a peck on the cheek.
He held the rope firmly in hand and swung the axe a few times in a wide circle, building up a momentum that tugged the rope taught in his palms. With a low grunt, he released and the axe went sailing through the air. It grazed the bow of the small vessel, scratching the wood lightly.
Without a comment, Kili swiftly hauled the rope back as fast as he possibly could. He was visibly frustrated, but no one spoke. I could see Thorin eyeing his youngest nephew with both wonder at his confidence and disappointment in his abilities. Surely, if Kili had come that close to the boat, he could hit it directly?
Once more Kili swung the rope laden axe and threw it. Much too quickly. The axe landed behind the boat, further than necessary. The Dwarf was now shaking with barely contained anger. Something about this wood brought out an intensity in Kili that I was not sure I liked. Normally, he would have shaken something like this off with a laugh and a joke, but now his eyes were ablaze and he was struggling to drag the axe back through the murky waters.
He needed calming down desperately. I placed my hands over his and silently worked the rope back to us in time with him. Even in doing so, I could feel his hands starting to relax, the muscled clenching less tightly. When he had the rope back in his grasp, I rubbed soothing circles upon the back of his hands and he closed his eyes. His entire stance became his own once again, he was no longer the rigid, stoic stranger.
"This time." I promised in a whisper, knowing he would get my meaning.
Kili nodded, his eyes still shut against the world. He took a few steadying breaths as I inched away, for a moment he looked a little lost at the lack of contact, but he regained his composure and opened his eyes. He did not let his scrutiny diverge from the boat, forgetting everything else around him, he launched all of his attention onto the tiny target.
One final time, Kili raised his arms, swinging the rope with greater force than was probably required, and flung the axe out to the other side of the river. The object flew as though guided by the hands of the Valar, possibly Mahal himself for all I could tell. It landed, as you might have guessed, perfectly lodged into the prow of the boat.
Immediately, the Dwarves converged in celebration, clapping Kili on the back and shouting hysterical congratulations' that I could not understand because either they were speaking too fast or in their native Khuzdul; Bilbo gave the young Dwarf a firm handshake and a polite "Well done, good fellow."
I settled for waiting until the enormity of what he had just accomplished settle upon him, until his eyes finally fell upon me. Dark eyes filled with the delight and wonder that made me feel strangely warm inside and a smidge nervous, though I knew not why.
I beamed back at him as he made his way towards me, ecstasy and determination etched onto his visage. He took me gently into his arms, securing me against him, and leaned down to my face, pressing his lips against my own with an unfamiliar, but not unwelcome, ferocity that held me in place better than his palms ever could. This was not the soft, chaste kiss of the other night at Beorn's, but a hard and assertive assault of the senses. I was gasping for air within seconds, a thing that Kili only took advantage of. His tongue slid inside my mouth, probing and exploring wherever it could reach. I had no idea what I was to do – I had never shared a kiss like the first and was certainly at a loss with one such as this. I need not have worried, my instincts took over and my tongue mirrored his, moving fluidly as though it were just another part of Kili.
Speaking of other parts of Kili, his hands pressed the small of my back, pushing me flush against him. Needless to say, it was not merely his arms that I could feel. Evidently Kili had noticed a certain protrusion too, he pulled away slightly, a sheepish smile gracing his features. It was adorable that he should be embarrassed by such a thing, especially with me, though I wondered if he, too, had remembered that we were not alone, but surrounded by many now shocked Dwarves and a thoroughly mortified Bilbo. The look on my cousin's face told me plainly that we were to have words about this.
We broke apart, Kili keeping an arm around me and placing me just ahead of him, in an effort to cover himself. That was our first real kiss in front of the Company and I was not sure if I would have preferred it to have gone slightly less passionately, they did not really need to have seen that, and yet I could not truthfully say that I was all too sorry about it. Besides, a few of the younger Dwarves were regarding Kili with an awe that I had not seen from them previously. Thorin, on the other hand, did not appear impressed in the slightest; the stare he granted me was filled only with disgust, as though I had been the one to initiate such a vulgar display. Great, and I thought he and I were starting to get along.
Thankfully, Fili decided to detract the attention away from us by heaving the vessel across the black waters. Others slowly began to join him and soon enough all but Thorin had forgotten that little incident and were chattering about how best to go about crossing.
"We should see how many of us can actually fit inside the boat." Fili advised, it seemed a reasonable enough idea to me.
"Very well," Thorin agreed. "Ori, you first." He ordered.
One by one, he added another Dwarf, until – "Hold it!" Cried Oin. "The old thing will take no more."
Our experiment had proven that our little boat would take no more than four. We would have to go back and forth between each bank about five times. I could already see Bilbo's discomfort. The Baggins inside him was fighting hard against his Tookish nature; most Hobbits feared and distrusted water and boats, none more so than the Bagginses, and anyone who ventured into rivers or ponds deserved whatever end they met in their opinion, it was only the Tooks and Brandybucks that ever used boats these days and the only real river we had in the Shire was the Brandywine. His Tookish courage and need for adventure seemed to be having a mighty fight, the Hobbit twirled his handkerchief – Beorn had been kind enough to gift him with one – betwixt his fingers nervously.
First to cross the river was Ori, Nori, Dori and Bofur; the latter would be the one to row the boat back to us. Next went Bofur, Bifur, Dwalin and Balin with Dwalin returning and so on. It was decided that, as Bombur would be the heaviest load, he should go last with the two remaining lightest beings, those beings being Bilbo and myself.
Bilbo was made to paddle his way back once he, Fili, Kili and Thorin were on the opposite bank, safe and dry. It took the little fellow rather a long time to get back to Bombur and I, he had been muttering furiously the whole way, only when he had gotten closer could we hear his ramblings.
"…Nasty terrible things, adventures, make you late for dinner. Really, when does one ever feel the need to cross water that could potentially kill us all? All rivers are as bad as each other, it's a great wonder no one had yet drowned." The boat wriggled, "Aaargh! This surely cannot be safe. Never again will I cross so much as a puddle!"
"Calm down, dear cousin!" I called, "The more you complain, the more you will disturb the boat!"
Bilbo simply huffed and resumed his mumbling, he was more scared than angry; I could tell by the slight scrunch of his nose and height of his brow. The Hobbit bumped the boat along our shore. I held the boat steady as Bombur clamoured in, it would have been far more difficult to squeeze him in once I was already seated. I then followed, making sure that I did not so much as touch the rippling waters as I climbed into the gently swaying boat.
It was a much faster journey getting across with Bombur and I rowing as opposed to Bilbo, even with Bilbo's whimpering as Bombur's movements rocked our vessel. It would have been amusing to see Bilbo in such a freight, but I understood his mistrust of water; it would have even been amplified by the warnings Beorn had given of these treacherous waters. His incessant ramblings continued in much the same vein as before, only now they sounded a little more frantic; perhaps our speed disconcerted him as well. Nevertheless, it was quieter than before, which also meant that he was more afraid; after all, a child will not scream at their most deepest and darkest of fears, for they are too scared to utter a single sound.
Our dingy soon hit our destination and Kili all but tripped over himself to help me put my feet on dry land. Unfortunately for the boat's final occupant, Fili was also helping Bilbo flee from the river. The sudden removal of all the balancing weight made it so as the boat began to tip and tip rapidly. The vessel was overturning and poor Bombur knew not what to do and so did the first thing to cross his mind. He grabbed me. A great splashing crash echoed about me. Bombur. He was in the river. Beorn had explicitly said not to touch it and now Bombur was submerged and still pulling. No matter how hard I struggled, there was no getting away from Bombur's grasp. My fate was utterly and undeniably sealed; I was going to fall.
I could feel my hand slipping from Kili's, see the horror in his eyes, hear the air rushing past my ears and all of that before I realised I was falling backwards. The force of Bombur's pulling slackened as I felt my back break the surface of the oily river. A cold powered through me, penetrating my skin right to the very bones of my being; it felt like there was ice replacing the marrow, replacing my pulse. I was so very cold and unbelievably soaked. I may as well have fallen into open water for all the good kicking and spluttering did me, I thrashed as much as I possibly could – until the waters froze my limbs into place and stilled my breathing. Within moments the water spread like a skin over my face and I could see nothing, hear nothing, nothing at all but the same words repeated inside my head over and over again as the blackness sprouted inky shapes before my closed lidded eyes.
Open Water - Bless The Fall
Sorry for the late update, I had some personal stuff to deal with.