A/N - behold the last chapter of this story.
thank you to every single person who left a review, who favorited and who followed this story. it all so appreciated. i love you all so much!
i don't yet have an idea for another story (if anyone has any suggestions, please comment them ;) ) but i'll try and get one posted asap.
again, thank you to everyone!
Caleb couldn't move. He was sat on the king-sized bed he shared with his perfect wife, staring at three pictures hung opposite on the cream walls. They were of their wedding day, one of the happiest days of their lives. Caleb felt his heart break within him, and he had to look away.
The trees danced softly in the weak wind, the leaves gently rustling. It was fall, and everything was a beautiful mix of red and orange. Everything was calm, quiet. A leaf floated slowly to the ground.
Just across the street, hundreds of people gathered in the grounds outside of a beautiful, Victorian church. Alison straightened out the skirt of her long, chiffon dress and moved an inch to the right. Emily linked her arm with Aria's, her gold bracelet slipping down her wrist. Spencer kicked a stone out of the way of her four-inch heels. And Hanna stood staring at the camera, grinning from ear to ear. Her bridesmaids shuffled around, doing as the cameraman asked. Emily swapped places with petite Aria, Spencer and Alison murmured over who was taller between them.
"Okay, then!" the cameraman, Tony, yelled, holding his pointer finger up to the bright, blue sky. It was November, but the weather was oddly warm, but Hanna wasn't complaining. She'd been praying for good weather since she and her new husband set the date. "I'm going to take the photo after three, okay? Ready? One…two…three!"
All five of the girls beamed as the camera snapped the shot. Emily, Spencer, Aria and Alison were all clad in stunning, night-blue dresses that fell to the ground. Their heels were nearly six inches, and they—well, not Aria—towered over the small, tiny cameraman. He had been forced to adjust his shot every time one of the girls moved from one foot to the other.
As stunningly beautiful as the four bridesmaids were, they were nothing compared to the bride herself. Hanna stole the show—quite literally. As she had walked down the aisle just an hour earlier, everyone's jaws hit the floor. She was dressed in a backless, ivory, lace mermaid dress that accented every single one of her perfections, from her top to her bottom. The gown had a cathedral train that followed along behind her, cap sleeves that showed off her toned arms, and v-neck that subtly hinted at what was underneath.
"Nice one!" the cameraman exclaimed after quickly checking the picture he had just taken. It was perfect, with all five of the girls showing off their perfectly whitened teeth. "All right. Now for a few bride and groom shots."
Caleb was called over, and he came running. As Hanna had entered the church and spotted her fiancé standing at the alter, she had let out a little gasp. She was sure she had never seen someone look so handsome as Caleb did in his Hugo Boss three-piece. The handkerchief sticking out of the pocket matched the color of Hanna's bouquet exactly. The waistcoat was just tight enough to show off Caleb's toned chest. The light bounced off of Caleb's shiny patent leather shoes.
"Groom, can you pick up your wife bridal style for me, please?" Tony asked. Caleb did just that, and Hanna let out a small squeal. She threw her head back, laughing loudly, and the cameraman was quick to take the picture. It turned out perfectly, and would be the first picture Hanna and Caleb would later hang up in their first house together.
Caleb carefully placed Hanna back on the ground, mindful of her long trail getting in his way. "Now, bride," Tony called, "you need to lean into the groom, and stare directly at the camera. Groom, while she's doing that, I need you to kiss the top of her head. Got it?"
It took another two hours to finish the photos. After the bride and groom shots had been perfected, it was time for family ones. The family pictures took the longest by far. Instead of a normal family having just two parents, both Hanna and Caleb had four…each. The first pictures were with Ashley and Ted. The next were with Tom, Hanna's dad, Isabelle, Hanna's step-mom, and Kate, Hanna's step-sister. Then there were the ones with Claudia, Caleb's mom, her husband, and her two sons. And finally, there were the ones with Jamie, Caleb's father.
There was a quiet tap on the door and Claudia poked her head around. She noticed Caleb was sitting just as she had left him: in his pajama pants. Without saying anything, she quietly padded in, headed straight for the closet and picked up the all-black suit that was hanging from the door. Claudia walked over to her son and carefully sat down next to him.
"Caleb, you need to get ready," she said quietly. "You don't want to be late, do you?" Caleb didn't move. His eyes were glazed over, like his thoughts were in a completely different world of their own. Claudia sighed. She hadn't gotten a word out of her son in over three weeks, a month after the accident had happened. "Caleb, please. We need to leave soon," she pleaded. Caleb slowly turned his head towards her, but continued to stay silent.
"I can't go," Caleb croaked. His voice cracked, and his eyes started filling with tears.
"You need to, Caleb," Claudia replied, her voice as firm as she could possibly make it. "I'm not letting you miss the funeral of your wife and child."
Caleb swallowed hard and turned back to the wall. "It was a boy," he mumbled. Claudia breathed in deeply, but then stopped.
"What?"
"The baby," Caleb explained, "was a boy."
Claudia let out a stifled breath. Caleb hadn't told anyone the gender of the baby; it just didn't feel right. He and Hanna had promised each other they would keep it a secret from all of their friends and family until the birth, where they would release his name as a give away. But there wasn't going to be a birth. There wasn't going to be a moment where Caleb would hold his son of the first time. There was going to be nothing.
"Did—did he have a name?" Claudia said, her hands beginning to tremble.
Caleb had to take a deep breath. It felt wrong, saying this. Hanna would have killed him if she knew he was telling someone before the birth. But Hanna couldn't kill him. She couldn't kill him because she had been killed herself. And Caleb was never going to see her again. "Finley Elliot," he finally whispered.
Claudia felt a pain in her gut. She would have—should have—had a grandson. Her first grandson. And his name…oh, how perfect the name was, she thought. "It's lovely. I remember the day you were born; how happy I was I had a son. And although I never had the chance to watch you grow up, you were always the best thing to have ever happened to me. When I left you, I never thought I'd see you again. I still haven't forgiven myself to this very day. And I can assure you, you won't ever forgive yourself if you don't go to this funeral. This is your only chance to say goodbye to Hanna and Finley properly."
The pain was still raw, so raw. Just hearing her name sent a ripple of grief through his soul. But Caleb wasn't just grieving for his wife. He was grieving for the son he never got to meet. The son he never got to hold. The son he never to got tell how damn much he was loved by his dad.
How had it come to this? How had it come to Caleb attending the funeral of his wife and unborn son? How was it possible? No one had the answer. The news had spread around quickly, but all anyone could tell Caleb was how sorry they were for his loss. He didn't want to know they were sorry. He wanted to know why it had happened. Why it had happened to him of all people.
"I can't go," Caleb said again. Attending the funeral meant it was real. This could all be some sick, sick nightmare and soon, Caleb would just wake up and Hanna would be lying right beside him, snoring away, whilst taking up over half of the bed. He would wake up and she would still be five and a half months pregnant, and in the morning, they would go out to the store and start buying nursery decorations.
"Please," Claudia begged. Her heart felt heavy. She had lost a daughter, a grandchild, and now it seemed she had lost a son, too. "I can't go by myself."
"You won't be by yourself," Caleb replied, his voice cold and harsh. "You'll have Clay and James."
Claudia felt like she was fighting a losing battle, but she wasn't going to give up. Even it meant using all her strength, she would take Caleb to that funeral and let him to say his goodbyes to his wife and son. "Fine. Go for Madelyn."
Caleb stopped. Madelyn. Maddie. Amongst all of the grief, Caleb had forgotten about his baby girl. He hadn't seen her since in over two weeks. She must be so confused, Caleb thought. Her parents had abandoned her. Well, Hanna not by choice. Caleb suddenly stood up and marched out of the door.
"Caleb?" Claudia called out, following him down the hall. They were in the apartment—Claudia had flown out from California almost immediately after hearing the news, and had been staying with her son ever since—and Caleb walked into the living room, where he picked up his cell and tried to switch it on. The screen stayed black. Crap, he thought, it's dead. Caleb spotted his keys on the coffee table and grabbed them, before heading over to the door. Claudia had no idea what had suddenly gotten into Caleb, but she sure as hell knew she wasn't going to let him drive anywhere. Before Caleb could open the front door, she jumped in the way.
"I need to see Maddie," Caleb declared.
"She's in Rosewood, Caleb. She's three hours away," Claudia replied.
"So? I'll drive to Rosewood, then."
"No you won't," Claudia scoffed. "You can see her later, though."
Caleb's face was about to turn purple with anger. "I don't want to see her later, I want to see her now!" he yelled. Claudia jumped, frightened by the sudden outburst.
"You're not in a position where it's safe to drive," she said as calmly as possible. "Get your suit on and I'll drive us to Rosewood. The funeral's there, anyway."
Somehow, Claudia managed to persuade Caleb to get changed. The process was long, with Caleb moving slowly. He put one leg in the pants, but waited a good minute before putting in the other. Claudia was already dressed in a black pencil dress, a pair of small kitten heels, and had a thick, black winter coat hanging up by the front door.
Claudia and Caleb sat silent in the car. They were parked in the lot next to the large, Victorian church, and had been for the past 10 minutes. Various people were wandering into the church, all wearing black. Claudia looked to her right.
"Come on, Caleb." She grabbed his hand reassuringly. "Let's go in."
Caleb quickly pulled it away. "I can't."
"Caleb, please."
"What do you want me to do? Go right in like there's nothing wrong? That's my wife's funeral in there. My freaking wife. So, I'm so very sorry, Mom, if I don't want to get up and go inside," Caleb yelled, spitting everywhere. Claudia gulped. He was right. But so was she.
"I can promise you now, you will regret it if you don't go to that funeral," she said. "I 100% promise that you will."
—
Caleb sat on the front pew, Aria, Spencer, Emily and Alison to his right. Ashley sat to his left, and had her hand gripped in his, whilst the other held a crumpled, tear-stained tissue.
There, in front of them, stood the coffin. It was a fine, mahogany wood, with beautiful flowers lying across the top that cascaded down to the floor. They were Hanna's favorite flower, lilies, and it was a painful reminder of what Caleb would never be able to buy her again. He used to love surprising her with a bunch when she used to come home from the boutique in Rosewood; her face would always light up when she saw them.
Pictures also surrounded the coffin, pictures of a fun, loving, beautiful woman who's life had been cut so tragically short.
"It'll be okay," Caleb heard Ted whisper to Ashley. Ashley looked tired and oddly aged, with her eyes teary. Madelyn was three pews back, sitting on the lap of her grandfather, Jamie. Claudia was there, too, along with her husband and two sons. Caleb was right, she wouldn't have been alone if he hadn't of come. And right now, Caleb was really regretting the decision to walk through the very doors that he and Hanna had burst out of on their wedding day. What a stupid idea, Caleb had thought, to hold the funeral in the same church the wedding had been in.
The minister at the front of the church shuffled towards the coffin and when he stopped, slowly clasped his hands together on his stomach. The church was filled with nothing but sadness, sorrow and grief. There are no smiles, no jokes, no laughter. Everything's solemn, and Hanna would have hated it.
"We're gathered here today to celebrate the life of Hanna Elise Rivers and her unborn child. Hanna was a gentle and kind young woman, who was thoroughly devoted to her husband and daughter…"
The minister carried on, but Caleb zoned out. He couldn't hear this. He couldn't hear what a wonderful woman Hanna was; he already knew that. Sitting here, in this very church, that he had married in just five years earlier, was destroying him. Caleb wanted to wake up from this nightmare. He didn't want to feel like this anymore, so heartbroken. He was in pain, physical pain, and it hurt. He was distraught, he was alone. And there was no one there he wanted to comfort him more than Hanna herself.
Images of the night Hanna was killed started flashing before Caleb's eyes. The arguments, the shouting, the loud slam of the front door filled Caleb's mind. The amount of regret Caleb felt was making his body ache. If only he could go back to that night and tell Hanna she didn't have to move to California if that wasn't what she wanted. She wouldn't have left the apartment, she wouldn't have gotten into her car filled with rage, and she wouldn't have been hit by that truck.
The funeral was ended with a short, meaningful but simple prayer. The congregation stood and started a slow descent out of the church, the coffin following shortly behind. Ashley grabbed Caleb's arm as she past the large doors and carefully made her way down the stone steps.
Ashley felt numb. Numb with grief, numb with sadness, numb with disbelief. There was an overwhelming sensation of pain within her heart. It felt like part of it had been ripped out, leaving a hollow hole behind, a hole that would never be filled again. When Ashley received the news that her only child, her beloved daughter had been killed, the world had come crashing down. She had dropped the phone and collapsed onto her knees, cursing at God.
"Why?" she had screamed repeatedly.
The burial was quiet. The winter sun was shining down, reflecting off of the wood. A few birds chirped in the tall trees above, but only the ones brave enough to come out in this cold weather. There was a harsh chill in the air, puffs of breath visible as everyone shivered. Caleb and Ashley stood arm in arm. Emily and Alison stood close for warmth. Aria and Spencer stood huddled into their husband's arms.
The minister mumbled a few words for the people that were listening, but for the close friends and family of Hanna, it was impossible to focus on what he was saying. All any of them could think about was the person lying inside of that wooden box.
Emily was remembering the moment she and Hanna first met back in sixth grade. Both girls were so awkward and giggly, they never even told each other their names. Their formal meeting and introducing of themselves happened three days later, when they were both standing in the cafeteria by themselves.
Alison was remembering the time she spent with Hanna in prison back in their final year of high school. It certainly wasn't a joyous time, but it was time they spent together, without the interruption of the other three girls.
Spencer was remembering when Hanna announced she was engaged to Caleb. Hanna had been so excited and ecstatic, she was barely able to let the news out. She had immediately shown everyone the bright, sparkling ring on her finger. She was the first one to get engaged, and made sure to let the others know.
Aria was remembering the day Hanna let it slip that she was pregnant with Madelyn. She wasn't supposed to, as she and Caleb had planned to announce the news at Christmas when they would all be spending time together, but accidentally said it whilst talking about going on vacation. She had murmured something about not being able to fly in a few months because she would be too big, and all four girls stopped chewing their food and let their jaws drop.
Ashley was remembering the phone call she had received from Hanna, letting her know that she was on her way to the hospital because she was finally in labor. Hanna was supposedly contracting, but she somehow managed to equal with excitement through all of the pain.
And Caleb…well, Caleb. He was remembering every second he ever spent with what he thought as the most beautiful, kind, sweet and just perfect woman to ever walk this earth.
It was hard to believe that very person was trapped inside of the coffin, her body mangled. The car had hurtled down the deserted street at such a speed, Hanna's body was nearly as wrecked as the vehicle was.
Ashley stared at the hole in the ground. This was it. This was her final goodbye to her baby girl. A tear rolled down her cheek, and she held the lily that had been handed out at the end of the service close to her heart. Emily and Aria simultaneously threw theirs towards the coffin, and it gently fluttered down to rest on the lid. Spencer did the same, and then, a few moments later, so did Alison.
Caleb gripped the stalk of the lily tight in his hand. He tried to let it go, but his body kept refusing. His fingers wouldn't drop it, like it was the last piece of Hanna he had left. He couldn't throw that.
Moments before the burial ended, Caleb let go of Ashley's arm and bent down. Now, with his face closer to Hanna's body, he whispered, "I'll never stop loving you, Hanna Rivers."
And Caleb never found someone so beautiful, so perfect again.