Three months ago, I ran away from home.

You know, this whole business of running away ended up going a lot more different than I thought it would. Every time I went into the grocery store, I would check the little boards they had up in them for parents looking for lost children, just to see if I was on them. Not once did I see my picture, my name, nothing. The world outside didn't seem to care that perfect angel Tino Vainamoinen had ran away from home. Granted, I was pretty far from that old house I used to live in now. I had trekked all the way from Helsinki to Tornio. Granted, I took buses along the way and stuff, but hey, I was pretty proud! I wonder a lot if my parents even bothered trying to look for me, or if they just woke up the day after I left, shrugged, and went on with their life.

When I think about it, I am a little astounded by how little I care what they did. I mean, they gave me life, you think I would care a great deal more what their opinion of me was. Every time I thought about them though, I simply give them the same disregard I can only assume they gave me. A shrug, oh well, who cares. Stuff like that. If they were looking for me, I doubt it was a really through search. After all, Tornio is a very long way from Helsinki. They let me slip away this far, and every step just got me a little further away from them. Every step was a step closer to assurance that I would never see them again, and that almost made me happy.

My list was the same. I haven't checked off any of them yet, because I haven't really settled down long enough to have time for feelings. But the pages after the list had changed over the three months I have been gone. It's kinda become a diary, listing out all the cool stuff I see, all the stuff I do, what I think. A mess of musings in sloppy handwriting, because I most certainly was not blessed with the gift of good handwriting. That was the one fault everyone back in Helsinki did see. Oh, he's perfect, Miss Vainamoinen! Except for that atrocious handwriting... Nobody actually said that, but I bet they probably thought it. Not like it mattered anyways, I doubted I would see anyone I had ever saw there here. Tornio is nice and all, but Helsinki is Helsinki. None of mom's high society friends wanted to be here. My mom wouldn't come here either, being the high class snob she is, and dad had the same sentiments. Unless they suddenly got washed over with love they have never felt for me in their entire lives, I didn't need to count on ever seeing them again.

Anyways, if anyone got their hands on my diary, I could be sent to jail, so I am pretty protective of the thing nowadays. I write a lot in that little thing, and the pages of that book knows that I have had to resort to stealing stuff to get by. I started out with six hundred Euros. I never expected that to get far, sure, but having to steal sucks. Luckily, though I didn't get good handwriting, I did get blessed with good looks.

You're probably thinking- Tino! How does being attractive make theft easy? I'll tell you. It takes away all the rules of thievery I swear, all I gotta do is bat those pretty little eyes of mine and suddenly I can take a shower in cash. Okay, that is an exaggeration, but being cute gets me out of the whole hard part of stealing stuff. Who knew that having a nice face is about lethal as holding a gun to someone's head? I certainly didn't, but when I walked up to that first girl at the park and kindly swindled her into giving me thirty Euros, I found out quick that I could be a criminal and not feel too terrible about it. No messy bank hold ups, no guns, no potential to kill. Unless you really think looks can kill, of course, then I am certainly a murderer.

I looked down at that suitcase of mine. It was in worse shape than when I took it with me down my street, which sure is saying something. Started out just a little old looking and frayed, now it was faded and quite honestly, it looked abused. I opened up the creaky latches, examining my possessions. A little thought for all of you planning on running away, you never get over the fact that everything you own can be shoved into such a small space. Personally, I can't wait for the day I find something permanent and manage to get a job and stuff, so I don't have to think about how small I am. That hasn't happened yet though, and I only had ten Euros in this small bag.

"Time to be pretty." Sighing, I shut it again. 'Time to be pretty.' was something I always said before I swindled people out of their cash. I don't remember why it started, it was just a thing I said. Seemed as natural as breathing though, like I had to say it before I did it or else I wasn't allowed to do it. Running away messes up your mind a million ways, but it is also the best thing you can do in a situation like mine.

The sky was grey today. I like grey skies, they calm me. Calm was definitely something I needed right now, as I look at all these big buildings, targeting which one I should enter. A shopping mart never went well, for obvious reasons. Hotels worked the best, especially if they happened to be run by women. Many times I had charmed my way into a hotel and just stayed the night there, wanting a bed, not money. Maybe I could get both tonight?

With all that on my mind, I decided that I'd be walking into the next hotel I spotted. Surprisingly, it took quite awhile to find that hotel of glory. You'd think this place would have more hotels, being a border town and all. I bet the world just had it out for me and wanted to inconvenience me, like my whole life had been inconvenienced with my mere existing. No, I'm not suicidal or anything. Nobody loves life more than Tino Vainamoinen, trust me. A lot of times I just think it would have been better if I hadn't been born at all. If I had not been born, there would be nothing to miss, nothing to mourn about life. My parents would have liked that. Block it out as I may, I don't think I will ever forget the subtle reminders from my ever so bitter mother that I was an accident. My dad called me the broken condom more than once. I am entirely aware that my life, and everything in it up to this point, was an accident.

I found a hotel eventually, and walking into that hotel was no accident. Fate wanted me to go there. Maybe that is why I passed up all the other places I could have easily got money from. That was why I was so suddenly set on a hotel robbery. But I didn't know that this run-of-the-mill swindle would wind up being so much more than I had intended it on ever being. The hotel itself wasn't special looking, though it was notably old. Not exactly run down, but old. As I walked up to the front door, the sign next to the fancy looking door confirmed that.

Oxenstierna Hotel - Founded 1913.

A very simple sign, but it didn't need much more, did it? I didn't pay much attention to it in any case, too excited for the whole robbing thing. It is so wrong, but even for someone as clean cut as me, you still get that rush. Adrenaline, you can't help it. Or at least I always tell myself that you can't help it, because God forbid I actually enjoy robbery. I don't wanna become a criminal, right now I am just temporarily obligated to it.

Upon opening the door, I should have been a little more surprised by how welcoming the place was. Hotels are made to be welcoming, sure, but this place felt too right. Meaning, it felt too much like a home. I didn't notice at all. Too much adrenaline. Way too much. My hands shook, sweated, all that nasty-feeling stuff that happens when you are entirely aware you are about to do something very wrong. Maybe that adrenaline rush isn't as great as I originally described it, because the whole thing is very much laced with guilt. The lady at the front desk is probably in her early fifties, so I would have to play my cards right with this one. Women in their thirties oddly enough the easiest to get cash out of. Older made it a little harder, but nothing is impossible. I'm the untouchable Tino, after all, the boy who had escaped a falling home in Helsinki and got himself all the way to Tornio on his own. Worry shouldn't even be in my vocabulary anymore. I was king of the world, unstoppable!

Think that all I want, I didn't feel unstoppable at all standing up at this desk. She looked to me, giving me a curt smile. The lady wasn't so good at smiling though, it seemed super forced, but points for trying I guess. "Welcome to The Oxenstierna Hotel, would you like a room?"

I gulp, trying to think about literally anything else. So I thought about the lady. She was clearly aged now, but you could assume that once upon a time, she had been beautiful. Her smile sucked, but she had pretty hair. Blonde, albeit graying, but shiny. Her skin was smooth looking beyond the wrinkles as well. Being honest though, she could have looked like a literal pile of dung and would have still been considered beautiful just because of her eyes. I like blue eyes just like anyone else, but her's were different. Almost luminescent. Enthralling. I wanted to simply stare at them and be entangled in their beauty, but I had things to do, money to steal and such.

The realization that I was using my own beauty to get money from someone with those kind of eyes was a little daunting. Before I had always stolen from the less... Attractive. But I was already here, what was the worst that could happen! I gave her my smile, tugging my lips in that perfect way I had trained them. You have no idea how many mirrors I have stared into, making sure my smile was best it could be. I don't think anyone in the history of ever has ever cared about their smile as much as I do. I needed to though, the smile was what sold this whole thing. "Oh, yes! How much is one night?

She had no clue what I was attempting, so all she did was answer, "It'll be sixty a night."

Funny. I only had ten on me. I unbuckled my suitcase, handing her my ten. "This is all I have... Can I take a job or something to pay the rest?" Being the honest kid I was, I always did do that work I promised to do. But there is another part to this crime which involves me opening up the safe while I am cleaning and taking about eighty Euros out. I don't wanna take to much ever, I only ever let myself steal eighty at a time. I need to live, yes, but I don't want to put a business under just because I need to live.

"I have a son for that." The woman, who I was currently assuming was Mrs. Oxenstierna, scoffed. I had been rejected before, the initial rejection was actually normal, so I wasn't at all phased by it. This was the first time they had a son do their work for them, but I am sure that is a detail I can work around pretty easy.

I pout, keeping the money held out for her to take. "Then he can have a day off. Please, I really have no where else to go..." Hey, at least that last part was kind of true. No hotel would take ten bucks, I wasn't dumb. And I wasn't fond of the idea of sleeping in some city street. I was a runaway, not a homeless guy.

But I didn't have a home anymore, that qualified as homeless. I try not to think about being homeless though, it seems derogatory in my mind. In between homes is the term I prefer to use on myself. That way I never really have to mentally face just how shitty this whole situation is. Nevermind these thoughts though, I just think a lot I guess. The woman responded though, after a good few moments of staring me over, grabbing the money I had offered. "Hmph. I guess the kid needs a day off."

Phew, hard part over. Cracking the safe was never as hard as cracking the front desk. Less emotionally stressful, that is for sure. "Thank you." I keep my smile on, though it became more natural and relaxed as she gave me the key. I'd have a bed at last... And soon, money.

"No, thank you." Mrs. Oxenstierna smiled, "Once you get your stuff put up, come to the back room, just behind me. You got work to do." To be certain I knew the location, she pointed behind her, to a door. It wasn't labeled or anything, but even without her direction, it could be assumed that was a staff room of the sorts. In response, I nodded, proceeding to hurriedly head up a narrow flight of stairs that led to room four, which the tab on my key indicated would be mine for the night. I but only glanced at the room, in a hurry to get downstairs and get to work. Quickly, my precious suitcase was left on the bed, and I closed the door behind me.

Nothing eventful happened between me closing the door and coming downstairs. Something very eventful happened when I opened the door to the staff room. I was eye level with someone's neck as I opened the door, which I had not anticipated. Like any rational human being, I squealed. "EEEP!" I called back, stepping back a few feet for extra measure.

When I got the courage to look back up, I got a little less scared. Only because the head, and more particularly, the face, held up by that neck was a very attractive one. Wow. To put it in very simple terms, he was fine. A little frightening, but I like my men like that, so there were no complaints on my end with that. He had those glowing blue eyes the lady at the front had. Short and kinda choppy blonde hair sat upon his head, fitting his long, structured face well. He had an almost model-like face. Scratch that, why was this guy working in a hotel anyways? He should be strutting that beauty on some runway. Oh and did he have the body to match, those arms were so strong looking-

TINO. Contain yourself, please, for the love of God, you're about to steal from this guy's mom.

The whole 'I am stealing from this hottie's mom' thing just hit though. Maybe it was really shallow to think, but I felt a little worse knowing that someone this... Attractive, would be affected by my thievery. Actually, that was really, really shallow. I always felt bad for stealing, but I haven't ever stole from anyone with this attractive of spawn. Wow. Wow. I am officially the most shallow man on this Earth.

"Hi." He muttered, staring down at me. Oh my gosh, I was so staring at this guy. Put me in jail for eye rape immediately, because I am not going into detail, but I was not looking him an ounce innocently.

I gulped. "Uh- sorry. I didn't think you'd be... Like, at the door and stuff. Hi. Are you the lady at the counter's son? I'm Tino. I'm like super poor so I am taking your job for the day. Is that okay?" I mutter on and on about the most stupid stuff when I am around hot people, I swear, this is precisely why I have only ever had one boyfriend my whole life. Not like I intended on making a boyfriend out of this guy. Wouldn't mind it at all, but considering I am stealing from him, I don't think the relationship would go very far at all.

He nodded. He was so tall, he had to look down at me. That was kinda hot. Really hot. Damn. I couldn't even think in a complete sentence at this point, that's how hot he was. I don't think he knew how attractive he was, but it doesn't matter. He can be eye candy and unaware of it, fine by me. "Yeah, I'm her son. Berwald." And like any normal human being would, he held out a hand to shake.

Oh my. I was about to grab his hand. I, Tino, would get to touch an angel. Of course I was excited. I mean, who doesn't get all fluttery in their chest when they see a practical walking sex God like this? I thought stuff like that to justify it, but all I actually did was take his hand and smile best I could. "N-nice name. My name is Tino, it's really nice to meet you. Have a nice day and stuff."

Another nod. Do hot people nod a lot? According to Berwald's actions, they definitely did. "I will." Was all he said to me before walking past me, and I can only assume he left the hotel, because my mind took a good minute of spacing before I came back down to reality after that. Call me tough and stuff for enduring running away from home so well, but I do not handle hot people well at all.

Even with my mind stopped from a hot-man coma, the world did keep turning, and I was fetched for by the lady at the front desk, who never confirmed her name for me. I just kept going on assuming she was Mrs. Oxenstierna, which turned out working out by her. I'll spare you the details of my work. All that is important is that, the whole time, I was thinking. I do a lot of thinking. I was mostly thinking about Berwald at the beginning. He was the type of hot that just kind of leaves an imprint on your life forever. The type of hot that you remember, talk about with your friends, the immediate person you think about when someone says the word attractive. Mind blowing. You can't really blame me in particular for being so impacted by it. The last three months, though liberating, have been pretty mundane in terms of socializing, and I hadn't come across someone so mind-numbingly attractive my whole life. My weak state just made the impact harder.

Near the end of my work though, when the sun came down through the window, my mind got itself back on track. Even someone that unattainable type of attractive cannot take away the whole runaway thief factor of my life forever, though the brief distraction was awesome. I had to steal. I decided, due to her having Berwald as a son, I would only steal fifty bucks. I guess crime does discriminate, if you don't have tall, blonde, blue-eyed, muscular sons, you get more money stolen from you. But hey, that is life! I already had the safe in sight, this would be easy. It was tradition for me to finish working first though, so I didn't start my meddling until I had finished my last chore- the dishes.

The safe itself was easy to crack, easy to open, and that was all apparent just by the appearance. It was old, probably as old as the hotel I assumed. I put my ear up to the safe, needing to hear those small ticks to crack it open. But then, something happened to me that has never, ever, not even once, happened to me before. It was bound to happen eventually I guess, I just wish it hadn't been now.

I stopped upon hearing footsteps, and the opening of a door.

I sigh, pushing myself off the safe at the suddenly very loud sound of an opening door. I held my hands up, just to prove I wasn't gonna pursue the money anymore. I'd leave without protest, and hope they wouldn't inform the police. Because the police would send me home. And home was a million, trillion times worse than prison.

"Filthy." At least I hadn't been caught by Berwald, I would have felt worse. But no, just his mom. I could feel her disproving stare in my back, I swear. I held my head low. Just because her super hot son didn't catch me did not mean I didn't feel bad. Being caught at all made me feel like crap. Even doing it made me hurt. Here I was, the perfect son in everyone's eyes but my own parents, stealing from a hotel. Never before did I ever think I would wind up doing this, but I was doing it, and this could be the end. "Face me."

I turn around willingly, not meeting her bright eyes.

"Why?"

Okay, time to meet those bright eyes, because I was way to confused. Why? What happened to getting cussed out? Or shot? Or the normal reaction? Who even asks why? Who cares why? "Why?" I blinked, not getting it.

"Yes," She nodded, frowning, "You must have a reason why. So, why?"

Truth time. I sigh, slowly lowering my hands to my pockets. I had no fake pity story to get out of this. I had a real one. I never planned on getting caught, so what she was getting now was something she hadn't got out of me yet, something real. But I spared her the long story of being called the broken condom by my dad all my life, so I just told her the plain, simple, raw truth. "I'm a runaway. From Helsinki. Needed money."

"Ever thought about earning it?" I have never in my life been so confused. She seemed more annoyed than mad. Uh, I just tried to steal from your respectable establishment. Be mad like a normal human please, I can comprehend that. This just annoyed bullshit didn't make any sense to me.

But the least she deserved was an answer. I am no criminal, not a normal one. A normal one would- I dunno- try to kill her or something. I'm to weak to do that, so I just kept up with those answers. "I want to. I don't like the whole stealing thing. But I'm never in one place long enough to get a job anywhere."

Mrs. Oxenstierna nodded. There was something off in her eyes. I couldn't pinpoint what it was. But this wasn't normal. "I see. Go to bed now."

Cue question marks in my mind. What? No 'Get out of my hotel!'? Just 'Go to bed now?' I didn't know how else I was supposed to respond, so I just nodded, willing to do whatever she told me. Maybe she wanted me in bed while she called the police. Maybe she was gonna kill me in my sleep. I didn't know what was going on at all, but I felt bad, and all I knew with certainty was that I wanted to make up for my thievery, so I did as she said.

I closed the door to my room, left it unlocked. If she was gonna kill me, fate clearly wanted it, so there wasn't a point in trying to fight fate anymore. Just leave it open Tino, make it easier on the woman. Before falling onto the bed with knots of guilt welling in my stomach, I took my suitcase off the bed and tucked it away under the bed, immediately curling into a ball on it. I stared at the wall for a long time, thinking about things. No angry footsteps ever came to kill me, not while I was conscious at least.

Tino, you messed up.

With such a guilty heart, you would think I wouldn't be able to sleep that night. But they sure had put me to work for those fifty Euros I owed them, and I was bone tired already from walking so much these past months. I slept well. Guilt didn't affect my sleep at all.

I didn't know what tomorrow held. But what happened was something I didn't anticipate at all, and I even anticipated my own murder, so that's saying something.