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One more chapter after this one, and it is everything that you have been missing…like the why and the how and all that jazz…So until then, you get this little bit of angst mixed with a tiny bit of humor. Enjoy!
He will wake up.
When?
You should go rest.
I'm fine.
Stay positive.
I am positive.
Didn't all these people realize their "words of encouragement" weren't working? They could go home. They could go rest. They could stay positive. But she was going to sit right here, in this chair, until he opened his eyes, and until he could speak to her.
And God help the next person who tried to remind her it could be a while until he wakes up, or the person that tried to force food into her hand one more time.
She was fine, and most of all she was not a child. If she was hungry, she would eat. If she was tired, she would sleep.
Their concern—although on some level appreciated—was unwarranted.
Two days had gone by since the accident, and the fire was under control and almost extinguished completely. If they wanted to be helpful, they could go solve a murder. Or even better they could go see if there was anything at the scene that hadn't burned up. They could tell her exactly what had caused the accident.
Nonetheless, they could not continue to tell her what to do or how to feel. She's the one that gives the damn directions, and when Lieutenant Provenza decided to show back up she was going to make that clear to everyone.
As Provenza walked in the hospital and navigated the halls to the waiting room, he could feel the tension in his shoulders building. The Captain had been anything but compliant since Rusty had come out of surgery. He knew the woman was as stubborn as a mule, but really sometimes it was frustrating as hell. He did not come here to argue with her. However, he was here to wrangle the team back to work. They had a case, and Taylor was being his usual self, worrying about the story breaking on the news and trying to stay ahead of it. Taylor was a real ass most of the time, but seeing as how they were stuck with him until Pope retired, it was better to just pretend to appease him.
Rounding the last corner into the waiting room, he heard Sykes tell Flynn that she was going to go get coffee. She stopped mid-stride when she saw Provenza though.
"Lieutenant? I thought you wouldn't be back until tomorrow?" Sykes questioned.
"Well Sykes, nothing like a good murder to ruin plans."
"We have a case?"
"Very good Sykes," he snarked and then turned his attention to the rest of the team, "Looks like our time here is done. Where is the Captain?"
"Where do you think?" Flynn shot back with as much sarcasm as possible.
Provenza chose to ignore that remark, everyone was running low on sleep and caffeine. Instead he headed down the hall to Rusty's room. He stood outside and peered through the window for a moment, just watching the Captain. She looked like hell. He didn't think he had ever seen her look this run down or exhausted before in their 20 something year relationship. He sure as hell wasn't going to tell her that though.
She was running her hand down Rusty's arm saying something to the kid. Every so often, she would raise her other hand to wipe her eyes. She had been by that bed for a day and a half now with the exception of about an hour.
The longest hour of his life.
When the kid made it out of surgery, the Captain had disappeared saying she needed some air. Provenza had given her 10 minutes, figuring that she just needed a minute away from the commotion, but when the nurse had come back and said Rusty could have one visitor at a time, Sharon still wasn't back. He had gone in search of her and found her kneeling on the floor of chapel, crying silently.
The last thing he had wanted to do was intrude, but it seemed as though she wasn't going to be pulling it together anytime soon. So, he had gone to her and carefully placed his hand on her shoulder. Sharon jumped at the touch, but then just sank completely to the floor and continued crying. After a few moments the tears let up, and he handed her his handkerchief. She had been shaken to core by everything and held it together long enough to find the kid and rescue him, but now that he was safe and out of surgery it all hit her. If there was one thing that everyone knew about Sharon Raydor, it was that she was a mother above all else. Because of that he hadn't been sure what he could do for her, so he knelt beside her on the floor just offering her support through his presence.
Once she had regained her composure, he could see the exhaustion already setting in from such an emotional attack. They had exchanged a few words, words that he couldn't even remember now, but he remembered her trying to apologize for him having to see that. Their relationship was very different from the past. She wasn't the wicked witch of the west anymore in his eyes, so of course he had shrugged it off because he didn't want to let her see his emotions either. Then, he had stood and pulled her to her feet. She straightened her jacket, looked him in the eyes, and said, "Let's go see him."
It had been the fact that she invited him in with her to see Rusty first that had shaken him up. Sure, they were like "parents" to the kid, but the Captain did all the heavy lifting, he just offered advice and support here and there.
Provenza was drawn from his memories when a nurse bumped into him accidently. They both apologized, and then she hurried off to do whatever she had to do, reminding him of why he was there in the first place. He tapped on the window lightly to get Sharon's attention, and when their eyes met he nodded for her to come out there. Provenza didn't want Rusty to hear what he had to say—if the kid could hear them.
As Sharon joined him in the hallway, wrapping a sweater around her tightly, he cleared his throat trying to figure out what to say first. "How is he doing?"
Her eyes found the boy through the window when she responded, "He is about the same. I think he has a little more color now, what do you think?"
Provenza also moved his eyes toward Rusty. He didn't agree with her, but he nodded his head for no other reason than he wasn't about to dispute anything she had to say in the state she was in.
"I thought you had left for the night, Lieutenant?"
Right. That's what he needed to talk to her about. "Duty calls, we caught a murder, and Taylor called me. I came to get the team because no one was answering their phones when I called."
"They are here still?" Sharon glanced nervously down the hall. "I told them I was fine and to go home."
"You know they don't always listen to what we tell them," he said trying to lighten the mood somewhat. It didn't work because not even a smirk crossed her features.
"I should go thank them," she said hesitantly looking at Rusty again. It was painfully obvious that she didn't want to leave his side, but still felt the need to be polite to the team.
"I will let them know, but Sharon—"
She cut him off, "No." She shook her head, "I'm not going home, and I am fine. I appreciate the concern, but I can't handle it right now."
"Well that isn't what I was going to say anyway," Provenza said—even though it definitely was—this woman was so frustrating! "I was going to say call if you need anything. You're not alone."
Those were just about the most caring words he had ever said to this woman and surprisingly he didn't feel like he was going to have a heart attack.
"Thank you, I will keep you updated." Her eyes were on Rusty as she spoke, and her hands were shoved in her pockets. Everyone knew that was one of her tells. He decided to let it slide for now. He was just about to turn and walk away when he heard her whisper, "What if we were too late?"
Of course she would find a way to blame herself for this. "We weren't, the kid is tough, but he's also stubborn like his mother," she looked at him and he smirked, "No one can make him do what they want until he is ready. You two are two peas in a pod." He put his hand on the Captain's shoulder, "You got to him, and that's what counts. Call me if anything changes."
Before she could reply he turned to go, and just before he rounded the corner of the hall he called over his shoulder loud enough for her to hear, "And ye gods eat something!"