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Chapter 15: Disputes

"You just want me as some petrified sex slave. Hear me out; I do not fear you any longer. I do not know who I was for the past 12 years but I do know one thing. I will not make the same mistake and fall for you again.

The words coming out of Hiroki's mouth was something Nowaki never in this lifetime he would think to hear. How in the world Hiroki came up with that assumption makes Nowaki question on who Hiroki was talking to. Obviously neither Akihiko nor Misaki have any grudge against him.

"Hiro-san, where did you get that disgusting idea about me from?" Nowaki questions

Hiroki deflect and twist the doctor's queries with his disputes

"Why did you do it? To screw around my mind? To trap me like a bird in its cage?"

"Hiro-san, all I have been to you for these past 12 years was kind to you. I never did anything that might cause harm to you."

"Then how the hell did I get into this fucking hospital?"

Nowaki backed off. Tears begin to form in his eyes but the urge to cry was pushed aside.

"I'm sorry…" Nowaki muttered

Hiroki looked at the unstable tall doctor.

"I'm sorry, for causing such confusion, for getting angry at you, for making you angry, for not trusting you, for…"

Hiroki soften his eyes at what he hears stutters from the tall doctor. He continues in a shaky voice

"For not taking your word, for not protecting you, not being there when you needed me for…for…"

"Kusama"

"for…" he continues ignoring the patient

"Shut up already, no need to say more"

"for…"

Nowaki resisted those tears once again. He was never to be the one crying in this relationship but for all the things happening to him he can't help it but to let at least a tear drop down from the bottom of his eyes to the bottom of his cheeks. Hiroki catches that glimpse of water and can't help but feel pity for the man.

"Kusama, just stop, stop talking for now."

"For making you get into this god damn hospital and stuck in this bed practically paralyzed!"

"Kusama-san you need to get your emotions in place! You're not in the right mind!"

"Fuck my emotions!" Nowaki screams at the top of his lungs at Hiroki which causes him to shiver in fear

"Fuck it all! I put you in this damn mess because of my selfishness! I am so fucking exhausted, working my ass off for you in order to pay your damn medical bills, so fucking stressful over your condition, so fu-"

"Nowaki! Stop! You're frightening me!" Hiroki shouts and cutting him off

Nowaki heard his first name being called out. He realizes how much stress he is putting on Hiroki and tries to calm down by taking a deep breath.

"I am truly sorry; I'm just, so… tired, forgive me Hiro-san"

Hiroki crawled next to Nowaki who was sitting on the edge of the bed. He sighs and begins to comb his messy long chestnut brown hair with his fingers.

"You know, it's not all your fault. Even though I do not remember anything at all about you I do understand a tad bit on what you are going through."

Nowaki turns his face towards Hiroki while raising his eyebrows in curiosity.

"Which is?"

"Desire to know what is happening to my life right now. Am I correct?"

Nowaki nodded his head agreeing to the patients words.

"Hey, Kusama-san. If I ever leave from this hospital would you do me a huge favor?"

"Certainly, do tell."

"Take me to get a haircut."

Nowaki chuckled and nodded his head once more.

"Will do, but that overgrown hair of yours does suit you quite well."

"Shut up" Hiroki smiles

For whatever reason, the words from Tsumori's mouth do not appear in Hiroki's mind. Even with all of the terrible things he has said about Nowaki, it makes Hiroki wonder if he was actually happy before he lost his memories. Did he find happiness somewhere along the relationship he had with Nowaki that may make it worth the pain and suffering he suppose he had in his life. Either way the past was the past. Right now is the future and from his view point Tsumori may just be spitting out lies. Before he gains any trust for Nowaki, Hiroki said to himself that he needs to find someone who will tell him all the truth and nothing but the truth.

Nowaki left to go back to work leaving the book behind for Hiroki to read. Hours later there was a knock on the door which soon opens to a man with short black hair with midnight blue eyes.

Hiroki looks at this man with hunger in his eyes. Hoping he may be answer to all his questions.

Note: Long time no see! Sorry for not updating but school is such a drag with drama.