No one was in the elegant great room when Sirius entered the headquarters of the Order. No one was sitting at the large kitchen table either. "Hello?" Sirius called.

"Where is everyone? Start the party! Sirius has arrived!" But no one came to greet him. Sirius tried to ignore the strange feeling in his stomach and his suddenly pounding heart. There was always someone at the Order, always! Sirius took the steps two at a time.

When he reached the second floor landing he was so relieved to see people that he almost didn't notice that they were all sitting silently, looking shocked.

"What's wrong?" he asked as he bounded up the final few stairs. Dedalus Diggle, who sat nearest Sirius, was shaking and he had tears running down his cheeks. Remus sat beside him on the overstuffed couch, patting his back in a vaguely comforting manner, but otherwise looking completely out of it.

"Moony?" Sirius asked, but Remus didn't appear to have heard him.

"Joanna?" he asked, turning to the others sitting on the other side of the room. Joanna was pale and frozen looking; she didn't seem to be able to speak.

Sirius whirled around, looking for someone coherent enough to tell him what had happened. Gideon Prewett stood silently by the window, staring out at the dismal grey landscape. He turned to Sirius and lead him silently into the other room.

"There's been another attack," he said solemnly. Sirius stared at him, uncomprehending. Gideon and his brother were the funniest, liveliest pair of people Sirius had ever met, besides, of course, himself, and it took a moment for Sirius to even grasp the fact that Gideon was being serious.

"An… an attack?" Sirius finally managed, trying to think what could possibly make Gideon so incredibly somber and distant sounding. "Someone… died?" Gideon nodded. "Not… not Fabian?" he asked suddenly, naming Gideon's brother.

Gideon shook his head. Again Sirius struggled to think what could possibly make anyone this serious when, he, Sirius was around. Who was missing? Remus? No, not Remus… He was safe, Sirius had just talked to him… He was fine… James? Sirius gulped, his brain was working in slow motion. James was not there. He was not at the Order. James would have answered Sirius right away. James wouldn't make him guess.

"J- James?" Sirius at last managed. Again Gideon shook his head, 'no'. The wave of relief was so huge that Sirius almost jumped for joy. Then he remembered. Someone was dead.

"Peter!" Sirius gasped suddenly, but again Gideon shook his head. Sirius was starting to get annoyed. "Lily?" again Gideon shook his head, "Alice? Dorcas? Emmeline? Edgar?"

'No, no, no, no.' Sirius felt like screaming at Gideon, why wasn't he talking? "Frank? Benjy? Gwendolyn? Tra-" The change from a shake to a nod was so fast that Sirius almost didn't notice it.

"B-Benjy?" Sirius asked, shock spreading from his brain, through his body, all the way to the very tips of his fingers and toes. Again Gideon nodded and now Sirius could see why he hadn't spoken, he'd been holding back tears.

Cheerful, friendly, little Benjy? "N-no… no!" Sirius stumbled backward, away from Gideon.

"There was a huge explosion… The d- death eaters killed him… They… they didn't even f-find his body yet!" Gideon turned away, shaking his head disbelievingly. Sirius stumbled blindly back into the other room. He sat, trembling, down on the couch beside Remus.

When he'd first joined the Order, only about a month after he'd first met her, a young witch named Marlene McKinnon had died, but Sirius had barely known her. Five months later, Caradoc Dearborn had disappeared; they'd still been searching for his body up until recently, but lots of people had disappeared back then. The war had been going very badly; they'd been losing, but now… None of the Order had died in almost half a year!

Benjy… Remus looked at Sirius desperately. He was even paler than usual and looked like he might be sick. Sirius remembered their very first day at the Order… Remus had told everyone about his furry little problem and Benjy had shrugged casually, telling them all about his second cousin who was a werewolf. Sirius wondered now if he'd made that up to make Remus feel more comfortable. That was just the kind of person Benjy was.

Silently, he put his arm around Remus, gasping for air and shaking his head. They were shocked, everyone. The room felt like a wake or like a vigil in the room of a dying person. Who could kill Benjy? Disbelief, denial, astonishment… They hadn't been close, but Benjy was a great guy… And people in the Order didn't just up and die anymore! Sirius felt anger course through him. Remus's much too thin frame was quivering next to him. He was silently staring blankly at the wall. Every now and then he would turn and look into Sirius's eyes as if searching again for confirmation or comfort. Of the latter, Sirius had none to offer. He was too utterly shocked himself.

A/N: Hope you liked it! Please, please review and give me some incentive to update! lol