Jean collected the post from the box at the end of the drive. The morning sickness had begun to subside and she was feeling much better physically and about the pregnancy. Lucien was considerate but she had made it plain she was pregnant not sick and refused to change the way she went about things. Mattie had laughed when he offered to carry trays and baskets for her and she had given him a look that would have stopped Bill Hobart in his tracks never mind a lesser man. So he had given up after Mattie had talked to him about raising Jean's blood pressure!

There was the usual selection of bills and medical information and two letters, one for her and one for Mattie. They were post marked Melbourne and she thought they were probably from Martin and Martha.

In the kitchen she sat down to a cup of lemon tea, her preferred drink nowadays, and set about reading her letter. Mattie would read hers later, after surgery.

'Dear Jean

Thank you so much for making me feel so welcome the other week, and I'm sorry it has taken me so long to write. I would love to take you up on your offer to visit again, from time to time, but I will stay at the hotel, it would be unfair of me to make more work for you while you are carrying. I realised how much I missed Mattie and I am so very proud of her and how she had made so much of her life in the face of such adversity. I'm not sure I could be as strong. I am going to ask you a huge favour, will you look after Mattie for me, her father has not come around to her situation and is prepared to lose her to his stubborn attitude.

I'm not sure when I will next get to see Mattie and Grace, and you of course, Martin has a round of functions he needs me to attend as he tries to get elected; I can't say I'm looking forward to them!

I must close now and see to another dinner party.

Again many thanks,

Kindest regards,

Martha.'

Jean was pleased to get Martha's letter and surprised at how candid she was about her life with Martin. It saddened her to think that Martin couldn't reconcile himself to the choices Mattie had made about her life.

Mattie read her letter in her room while she fed Grace after surgery.

'My darling girl, her mother began;

I was so happy to see how settled you are and how lovely my granddaughter is. I would love to come and see you again, but next time I will stay the hotel, it would be unfair of me to add to Jean's load while she is carrying. They are just as you said, lovely, kind people and generous with their time and love.

Your father, I'm sorry to say, has still not come around to your choice of lifestyle. I had an argument with him about it, I think that's the first time I have defied him in all our married life. He is hopeful of being elected to office, and this means a round of dinner parties and social engagements he expects me to attend with him. I will, but only after securing a promise that I will be able to come and see you as often as I can, if I am welcome. We live separate lives, Mattie, not what I envisaged all those years ago, when I was young and extremely naive, not seeing how much I was being manipulated. Your father has always provided for me, financially, I have never had to lift a finger, but having stayed with you and the Blake's I know now there has been something very important missing from our relationship and that is love and respect. Your father even asked me if I intend to take a lover! I know it happens in the circles we move in, but I am not sure if that is what I want, or if I could. I have always believed it would be wrong to do so. I am also sure you would be very disappointed in me if I did.

Mattie, my dearest child, don't make the same mistake I made. Charlie is a lovely man; yes I did notice; and if he makes you happy, that makes me happy too. But whatever you decide will be the right thing for you. I do love you, even if I haven't shown it much, and I hope you can understand what I am doing. Love Grace with all your heart, make her the centre of your world if you need to, but make a life for yourself that you can be proud of.

I have written to Jean to thank her for her hospitality, and asked her to support you when you have read this letter. I have not told her everything I have told you.

My love to you and Grace, always,

Mum xx'

Mattie read the letter twice. Her father was so darn stubborn, and how dare he suggest her mother take a lover! She knew her parents had slept in separate rooms for years, her father said it was so he didn't disturb Martha when he finally retired for the night. As Mattie had grown and matured, and begun to have boyfriends she had found the situation a little odd. Ok the thought of one's parents being intimate was mind blowing, but when she thought about it, how had she come into the world if they hadn't been?! Once she had discovered this intimacy with Tom, she couldn't understand how her parents could live without it. She found she missed that feeling now, and looked forward to the time she and Charlie would marry, he had asked her and she had said yes, but they were going to wait until Grace was a little older, but not much! They had not given into temptation, it would have offended Jean and they held her in too high a regard to do that.

She hadn't realised how much her mother had not enjoyed her life with her father. She'd always seemed perfectly content, but maybe seeing Jean and Lucien together, and having noticed she and Charlie were very close, had opened her eyes to what a loving relationship could be. She hadn't seen her parents touch or kiss since forever, and in her world in Ballarat they were always touching, even if it was just a touch on the arm. Financial security, her mother had hinted, was not all she wanted. Would she mind if her mother took a lover? She wasn't sure, it'd be a shock, but ... She might talk that one over with Charlie and Jean. Funny that she thought she could talk to Jean about her mother being, essentially, unfaithful. But Jean was understanding and logical, and maybe, just maybe she would accept it. Not that it was anything to do with Jean but she would be shocked if Martha turned up in Ballarat with her lover, whoever he was. Maybe she should pick one for her! That made her smile.

A knock on the door and a bright voice offering tea, brought her out of her reverie.

'Please,' Mattie called back, and Jean came into the room.

'Your mother wrote to me to thank me for letting her stay the other week.' Jean sat on the bed and took Grace in her arms, while Mattie poured the tea.

'Yes, she said she had,' replied Mattie. 'She really enjoyed her stay, much more relaxed than at home, I think.' She offered the letter to Jean to read.

'Oh no, Mattie, that's personal,' Jean was surprised she had wanted to show her what her mother had said.

'No, please, Jean, I'd like you to read it,' Mattie insisted. It would be so much easier than trying to explain what her mother had said.

Jean read through the letter, she found it unnerving to read someone else's mail, but Mattie wanted her to see what her mother felt, and could admit to her daughter. She was shocked that Martin had asked if Martha wanted to take a lover. It was unimaginable to her, her first marriage had been happy and loving and her second even more so. But she surprised herself by thinking it would not be as bad as she thought. She didn't agree with extra marital affairs, but if Martha felt so unloved then why shouldn't she try to find the love she craved elsewhere.

'Mattie,' she turned and touched the younger girls arm, 'are you alright?'

'Well, I suppose deep down I knew mum wasn't happy, but she didn't show it. I thought it was normal that parents slept in separate rooms as I grew up, but then I realised that they were missing an intimacy that I needed, and still do.' Mattie looked at Jean, 'Don't worry, Charlie and I haven't done anything you would be disappointed in, but, Jean, I have to admit, it's not easy! How mum copes I don't know, but I don't know how I'd cope if she took a lover. Maybe it would be better if they divorced.' It saddened Mattie to think this but she wasn't Catholic and although divorce was still frowned upon by the Anglican Church it wasn't as bad as Jean's church.

'That wouldn't do your father's ambitions any good.' Jean said blandly.

'Oh to heck with his ambitions!' Mattie cried, 'what about mum, why should she suffer just because dad wants to be 'something'. All I've seen of these power hungry men is a total disregard to people's feelings. I've seen marriages fall apart for this as I've watched mum and dad entertain their so called friends!'

Jean drew her to her in a motherly hug. She understood Mattie's frustration. Lucien's only ambition was to support his wife and child, to treat the patients he had with compassion and fight for justice for those he dealt with as police surgeon.

'So, what are you going to do?' She knew Mattie wouldn't leave her mother to fight alone.

'Nothing for now,' Mattie admitted, 'but I'd like her to stay here when she comes to visit. I know it's extra work but I promise I'll help. She shouldn't have to stay in an anonymous hotel.'

'That's my feeling too,' Jean smiled, stroking her growing bump, 'it won't be a problem, I'm fine.'

'Thank you Jean, I'll let her know that we'll keep the guest room free, shall I?' Mattie hugged her friend back.

'We certainly will.' Jean left Mattie to finish her tea, relieved that the young woman could accept her mother had needs that had never left her.

Mattie wrote back to her mother immediately. Letting her know there was a room ready for her whenever she wanted to see them and Jean wouldn't take no for an answer. She didn't mention the 'lover' that her father had suggested, but did say that whatever her mother decided she would fully support.

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Back in Melbourne Martha read Mattie's letter and smiled at the updated photograph of Grace, she was growing so quickly. Mattie said Jean and she insisted that if she came to visit she was to stay with them. The one bit of information she left out, because her mother would then be adamant about staying in a hotel, was that Jean was expecting twins!

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Mattie did Jean's check up regularly, as she should. She had listened to the heartbeat of the growing baby and had smiled and then giggled.

'What's so funny?' Jean asked.

'Err..' Mattie took a deep breath, 'I can hear two heartbeats, and neither of them are yours! Jean, it's twins.'

'No!' Jean shouted, which brought Lucien running, worried that something awful had happened.

'Jean,' he gasped as he rushed, unbidden, into Mattie's consulting room, 'What's the matter?'

Mattie and Jean both burst into peals of laughter at his concerned face, so unfair!

'It... it's twins!' Jean grinned, 'Lucien I'm expecting twins.'

Mattie slid a chair under Lucien as he sank slowly to the floor. He'd fathered twins, two babies, oh my word! He was speechless, not usual for him.

'That would explain the size of your bump,' said Mattie, 'You're rather big for four months.' She hugged her friend, Jean's face told how happy she was.

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Martha found that she could visit Mattie about once a month. She enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere in Ballarat, and began to join in with the daily running of the house. She made tea, helped with the cooking; learning from Jean; and loaded the washing machine. She found she was happy there, it was so...ordinary.

Mattie enjoyed her mother's visits. She had never before understood her, and probably didn't now, well not totally, but she knew she was trying to make up for the lost years.

Mattie and Charlie decided to marry before Jean became too big and uncomfortable to attend. It was to be a church wedding, with a shortened mass as Mattie wasn't Catholic. As Mattie knew her father would not walk her down the aisle she had asked Lucien. Lucien was only too happy to oblige, he loved Mattie as much as he loved Li. Jean would look after Grace and Mattie had chosen Alice to be Matron of Honour. She had no close friends she could ask to be bridesmaid and, as this was her second marriage, well, a bridesmaid wasn't what she wanted. She wanted a more mature representation to accompany her down the aisle. And so Alice obliged.

The invitation to the wedding landed on Martin O'Brien's doorstep, Martha caught it before her husband could consign it to the bin. She was delighted and promptly informed Martin that their daughter was marrying and she would be attending, he was welcome if he could find room in his schedule. Martin was not best pleased to find Mattie was marrying another policeman, albeit higher up the ranks. He declined the invitation, another meeting. But even Martin couldn't deny Martha the chance to see her daughter walk down the aisle.

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About a week before the wedding Martha had been to see Mattie. She had spent a pleasant few days helping organise flowers, registering her approval of the navy blue dress Jean had made for her. She had helped arrange part of the house for the newlyweds. The house was large enough to split into two and eventually would be transformed into a house with adjoining apartment for Mattie and Charlie. If they wanted to buy their own property this would give them the time to do so, without rushing into anything foolish.

Martha had to go back to Melbourne to organise a function for Martin, a condition of her attending Mattie's wedding, but she promised to be back two days before the day.

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It was late when Martha arrived back home. There were lights on in Martin's room as she supposed he was still working. She needed some time to think about the dinner party, although she had left instructions for the housekeeper and hopefully there would not be much to do.

She walked up the stairs, looking forward to a good night's sleep but as she passed Martin's room she heard what she thought was giggling. Martin wasn't a giggler and the voice was too high pitched to be his. Against her better judgement, and fearing what she was about to encounter, she pushed the door open just enough. Martin was with his secretary and she wasn't taking dictation!. He didn't notice his wife, the woman who had decided she couldn't bring herself to have a relationship outside of marriage, silently close the door and make up her mind about the rest of her life.

She left the note on the breakfast table,

'My lawyer will be in contact,' together with a photograph of her with their daughter and granddaughter to remind him of what he was losing.

She packed everything she valued and left the house for the last time.

At the lawyers office she asked for a quiet divorce, she didn't want Martin to suffer in spite of everything. She told the lawyer what she had seen, that she wanted a yearly settlement and where she could be found. If, and only if, Martin would not acquiesce to her requirements, she hesitated to call them 'demands', then she would disclose everything, he would be ruined.

Martha wasn't due back in Ballarat for another two days and the last thing she wanted was for Mattie to find out what had happened, yet. When she and Charlie had returned from their honeymoon she would tell them, by then she hoped she would have more substantial news for them. She booked into a hotel about an hour from Ballarat until she could arrive at the Blake's without arousing suspicion. She was not going to ruin Mattie's big day.

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Martha sat in the front pew of the church next to Jean. They were taking it in turns to hold Grace. There was a small selection of Mattie and Charlie's friends and colleagues to help celebrate their day. Matthew Lawson, the Best Man, she knew , was the former Superintendant of Police in Ballarat until he was injured too severely to return to duty, Agnes Clasby, an old friend of Lucien's and some nurses Mattie had worked with over her time as a District Nurse. The organ started up, Charlie stood to attention, handsome in his uniform, not daring to turn round to see his bride. Matthew put his hand on Charlie's shoulder and smiled encouragement, he saw how radiant Mattie looked, Charlie was a very lucky man. Lucien couldn't have looked prouder as he escorted Mattie down the aisle. He hadn't been able to do this for Li and when Mattie had asked him it had been all he could do not to cry.

The wedding was over much too soon for Martha, just to see her daughter so wonderfully happy as she took her vows, knowing she was choosing love over duty would live in her heart forever. She didn't notice Martin at the back of the church, nobody did. He watched Mattie marry Charlie, and left immediately afterwards. Martha's note and the photograph shocked him but he knew she had caught him, literally with his pants down, and she would never forgive him. He would have to make the best of it and had instructed his lawyer to agree to the divorce. Publicly it would be acknowledged that they had grown apart, not that he had been unfaithful. He didn't even care that much for his secretary, she had thrown herself at him and he had taken what he could get.

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Jean had prepared, with Mattie and Martha's help, a buffet to celebrate the wedding. Mattie had at first not wanted to put Jean to so much trouble, but Jean had told her that, as she found being pregnant with twins tiring, it would mean she could slip away to rest if she needed to, and she could take Grace for a nap when she became fractious. Martha had enjoyed this domestic activity. She was not particularly confident in the kitchen but with the other two women's instruction she was able to provide much needed help, she even washed up! Something she never thought she'd do. The celebrations went well. Charlie's colleagues from the station called in to wish them well, people came and went and Mattie enjoyed introducing her mother to the stream of people she had come to know and love. As the day wore on, Jean found she needed to slip away to rest. She felt old, old enough to be Mattie's mother, she was a grandmother, after all. She would be glad when the twins were born but she was worried about how she felt, constantly tired. It was a feeling she hadn't revealed to Lucien or Mattie, Mattie would refuse to go away and leave Grace if she thought Jean was not well enough. Settling Grace into her cot she sought out Alice.

Touching Alice's elbow she whispered, 'Can I have a word?' and moved into the surgery.

'Jean, are you alright?' Alice had noticed that Jean was pale and her make-up barely disguised the dark circles under her eyes.

'I am so tired,' Jean admitted, shame faced. 'I don't want to worry Mattie or Lucien, could you help me?'

'You could just be anaemic,' Alice offered, 'but if I take bloods I could be sure.'

'And if not?' Jean could only show her fear she was actually ill to Alice. She was six months pregnant, she had to get further in order for the twins to survive, but...

'I'm sure that's all it is, Jean,' Alice touched her friend's cheek, 'that and you do too much.'

'I ran a farm while I carried my boys,' Jean countered stubbornly.

'Jean,' Alice shook her head, 'you're carrying twins and, I'm sorry, but you're not eighteen anymore.'

Jean looked close to tears, this was not unusual. She had won the battle of morning sickness but crying at any given opportunity, no, she still couldn't stop the tears.

Alice, took her in her arms, 'Don't worry, you'll be fine. Now where are Lucien's syringes, if we're quick I can take your blood and he'll never know, unless,' and she stressed this, 'unless I find something of note. I will tell your husband.'

Jean gave her a wan smile and showed her where the syringes were and Alice took the samples.'

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Martha saw Jean and Alice come out of the surgery, Jean looked worn out. Jean would be taking care of Grace while Charlie took Mattie to visit his mother, and have a break in Melbourne where she lived. She hoped it wouldn't be too much for Jean. It was a source of concern to Martha, that Martin was in Melbourne and if they decided to try and see him he might tell them about the divorce She would have to hope that they would find something else to do, rather than visit him.

'Are you all right, Jean,' she asked going over to them.

'Yes, thank you, Martha,' Jean managed a smile, 'you are staying for a while, aren't you? I'd welcome the help.'

'Of course I'll stay,' Martha was touched to feel she could be of use, and she'd love to spend more time with Grace.

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Mattie and Charlie left for their honeymoon just after lunch. They had decided to travel during the afternoon in order to arrive at their hotel in time for dinner. Initially, Mattie had been worried about leaving her daughter, but she was weaned now and her mother and Jean had assured her Grace would be well taken care of.

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It was Martha who looked after Grace that week. Jean was exhausted, and Lucien insisted she rest, this time he was in charge and he would not take no for an answer. She was allowed to play with Grace but Martha took over the cooking, remembering what she had seen Jean do, and she found she had a talent for it. She understood flavours and what went with what. Jean relented and spent her days on the couch in the living room and in the sunroom, or sitting in the kitchen talking to Martha and giving her further instruction on certain recipes. It was on one of these occasions she broached the subject of the letter to Mattie. She apologised for having read it but Mattie had insisted. Although Martha didn't want to add to Jean's worries she told her what she had seen that night in Martin's room. She also told her she was going to divorce Martin on the grounds of infidelity. She didn't expect Jean to be sympathetic, in fact she expected to be shown the door, but Jean was so very understanding and said she was welcome to stay as long as she wanted. Martha accepted the invitation on the understanding she would help as much as she could around the house and contribute to the household expenses. She had been worried that Martin would cut off her link to the bank account over the recent weeks and had drawn out small amounts, putting them into her separate household account that Martin had set up for her when they were first married. She was in charge of running the house and he had never wanted to be bothered with it. As long it ran smoothly he left her to it, and so she had managed to save enough to keep her going for a while. Certainly enough to pay Jean for her keep.

Jean felt sad for her new friend. Martha had such a lot of love to give and Martin had thrown her over for his secretary. Some men were fools, she thought.

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Charlie and Mattie arrived at their hotel in time for dinner. Charlie had suggested they dine in their room, it would be more intimate than the dining room, he thought. Mattie agreed, just to be alone with him at last suited her, after all this time of there always being someone else around and a baby to take care of. She adored her daughter but was grateful that they hadn't had to bring her with them.

The week away was a wedding present from Jean and Lucien as was the chilled bottle of champagne they found in their room, that would have been Lucien, thought Mattie, such a romantic.

They ate their supper looking out of the bedroom window at Melbourne at night. The lights from restaurants and theatre sparkled in the streets. Charlie watched his new wife as she sat opposite him. He thought she was so pretty and he was going to enjoy showing her off to his mother.

There was a couch in their room and they took their champagne over to sit in comfort and sip the treat. Charlie slipped his arm around Mattie and gently took the glass out of her hand. He tipped her face towards him and, tentatively at first, kissed her. Mattie in turn moved closer and allowed him to deepen the kiss into a long passionate one. She felt his hand start to slide the zip at the back of her dress slowly down and his fingers expertly undo her bra. He was holding her too close for her to start on his shirt buttons but she didn't want to break the hold. He broke the kiss and looked into her eyes, then over to the bed, smiling a particularly wicked smile. Now they didn't have to worry about being caught by Jean. Mattie put her arms around his neck and allowed him to carry her to the bed and place her gently down. She knelt up and began to make short work of his shirt and tie, there were no inhibitions now. They could explore each other's bodies, Charlie found an appendix scar which her proceeded to kiss, and then moved up her body, tasting her sweet soft skin until he ended up back at her mouth. She grinned and wriggled enticingly and he gave in to her invitation.

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The early morning sun streamed in through the curtains. Charlie became aware of a weight on his chest. Something soft and sweet was draped over him and he smiled at the memory of their first night as man and wife. He was pretty sure their life together was going to be wonderful. Mattie stirred and opened one eye to look at him.

'Good morning, Mrs Davies,' he said.

'Good morning, husband,' she replied, and smiled, she felt so lucky, that after so much heartbreak she had the love of this good man. She snuggled closer and sighed contentedly.

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I'm sorry that this chapter has turned out so long, it just didn't want to end.