CHAPTER 1

- Dead in The Night -

They were alive and that was enough – at least it should be. She tried to focus on that.

It wasn't like she could do anything but sit and wait.

Not only was she grieving the loss of her magic, but also the two most important people in the world. Her boyfriend and her…best friend.

Enzo.

It had been two years yet now it seemed like a lifetime away. Every kiss, every touch seemed stranger than the last whenever she relived their story. No moment she reminisced was enough to comfort her. All they did was taunt her with empty promises and what ifs.

Then there was…Damon.

His loss left her with conflicting emotions.

Damon, a man she had loathed, had wanted to die, repeatedly. She had imagined it in many various ways and even been the cause of torture. Then he abandoned her and when he returned, she clung onto her pride unwilling to forgive him. This feeling was the worst – each bated breath berating Damon for a decision that he had made in fear. Yes, she despised what he had done but she would have known…if she could have seen this happening then her pride wouldn't have mattered as much.

She tried to push the guilt away. She fought against the doubt. She battled with her insecurities and the weighing need for defeat.

If anyone was a survivor, it was Damon.

They were alike in that fashion.

She hadn't realised or wanted to admit how similar they both were. Both protective of those they loved, both fighters, both repeatedly wounded to the point you wonder how they were still surviving. Often, she found herself wondering what he would do if he was her or what he would want her to do. She rationalised that her thoughts of Damon were more frequent because of their history. That was all.

Now she found her thoughts trailing to Alaric's wedding. The moment Damon had sacrificed his everything for her. He had chosen her. Sacrificed himself for her. Given her back her life – one which seemed meaningless if they were gone. Then when she was a hunter and he had fought so hard to make sure she had a life…a future. Regardless of the fact that if she died, the love of his life would return. Damon hadn't spared a thought as he and Enzo went on a killing spree until she was safe.

Only offering a few words, usually assurances, she spent most of her time in her thoughts. Thoughts that would probably be resolved once inked in her journal to Elena, however, these thoughts seemed more private. They only belonged to her and fear that another person would see them stopped her from searching for a pen.

Instead, she slumped onto the bed, feeling empty – hollow.

It was one she was accustomed to.

The only thing that helped was the brown teddy bear beside her. She had been pleasantly surprised to find that Damon had kept Mr. Cuddles. The amusing thought of him hugging the bear to sleep warmed her as she hugged it close.

All that was left...

The house was empty, leaving her feeling more alone than ever. All of which she had brought onto herself.

It was her anger than had driven everyone away. Unable to bottle it up anymore, it showed in her glares and abrupt answers. Each question slowly driving her into insanity as she continued to hang onto her last thread.

All she wanted was for everyone to leave her alone and without meaning to, she got her wish. Stefan disguised it as a coffee break and Caroline reluctantly followed. Bonnie felt her relief sink in as the door closed behind them. Now all she was left with was the overwhelming loneliness drowning her.

Turning onto the bed, she missed the musky scent that kept him alive. Stefan had changed the sheets and she'd wanted to yell but instead kept quiet. Thankfully, she found refuge in one of the leftover tartan shirts. One which she had worn for the past three days.

Unfortunately, even this scent was fading which lulled her mind back to her grief. It rattled in the broken cage, desperately screaming to escape – to be felt but she didn't dare reach out her fingers. One touch and she would break. One sob would result in defeat. Something she could not afford.

She was Bonnie Bennett.

The girl who lived.

A small smile rose but soon fell when she had a clutter and felt the sudden breeze. Sitting up she realised the heavy wind had blown the window open. One she was sure she had locked.

Standing up, she limply strode over to the window, bear in hand and reached for the shutters. Only her grip on Mr. Cuddles loosened, leaving it to fall on the floor but she was soon distracted.

"Hello Bonnie"

A rasped gasp froze against her lips as she numbly locked the windows. Her fingers trembled as she tried to get a grip. The grief had transformed into an overbearing fear, crippling her as she languidly turned around.

Everything she had wanted and dreaded materialised before her.

A few feet left between them.

He smirked, like nothing had changed. Nothing was different in him but she knew it wasn't possible. Nothing was ever this easy.

"I'm dreaming…"

Her voice was not her own. The tremors gave way which only made his sarcastic smile grow. There was something familiar about it that comforted her, enough to find her voice. "Damon?"

"The one and only"

He remembered.

It was him. Damon.

She smiled, remembering their previous reunion and how she had leapt into his waiting arms.

Before she could help herself, a sob broke through as she renacted their past. Her arms and legs wrapped around him and he held her securely. She made a mental note, asking him to never let go and somehow his grip only tightened around her.

Real or not, she just wanted to be.