HELLO MY PEEPS! How's everybody doing? I'm back with another chappy for you all so ENJOY!
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18 DAYS BEFORE DEATH
The first day of summer vacation was supposed to be a happy occasion, one full of laughter, happiness, and romance. Instead the beginning of our independent lives marked the beginning of the end.
Summer started off with a sour note. The first day out of prison, aka school, Ari and I spent at home. We were finally free from the annoying responsibility of waking up early, so we overslept with pleasure. I had planned to sleep for a solid twenty-four hours, but Jeb had other plans.
I awoke to the sound of shattering glass and heavy, thudding footsteps. Immediately, I jerked awake and listened. After the brief eruption of noise, there was silence in my house. Careful to not make a sound, I crept out of my room and down the stairs. Peeking around the wall's corner, I saw Jeb standing in front of a broken vase, head in hands, body shaking from tears. For a moment, I just stared. I could never describe how terrified I was in that moment.
Had he been drinking? I thought. However, this fear was momentarily dismissed when he lifted his head up and I caught a good look into his eyes. He had the same chocolate brown eyes as me that could be filled with joy in one moment and have mile high walls around our souls in the next. When Jeb had gotten drunk just months before, his eyes were always cloudy and somewhat glassy, almost as if he were staring right through you. In other words, he had the eyes of a dead man. But in that moment, I saw that his eyes were more than alert and his soul had been shook to the core.
I made a move to go back up the stairs and leave Jeb in this state, but that damn, crazed Voice in my head thought There's no time like the present to have father-daughter bonding, am I right? And before I could rethink this and stop myself, I was walking down the stairs, stepping into view, and approaching Jeb.
"Jeb—Dad—er, dude, are you okay?" I asked as I came to stand in front of him.
Chuckling quietly at my awkward attempt to address him, he forced a smile onto his face and tried to secretly wipe the tears from his eyes. "Yeah, Maximum. I'm fine." At this, I crossed my arms and jutted out my hip. "Really, Max. It's nothing."
"Nothing, my ass. Look, I tried to do this the nice, concerned-daughter way, but if what upsets you has even the remote chance of you having one of your—your—your episodes, so help me God, I will—"
"Maximum! Calm down. I swore to you that I would never have one of my…episodes again, and I am going to keep that promise. And although I may not have been doing the best job of it lately, I am still your father." Jeb looked like he wanted an apology and he sure as hell wasn't going to get one. Placing my hands on my hips, I stared my old man down until he sighed in defeat. Smirking, I made a Go on motion with my hands. "Fine. You know how I work as a scientist for Itex?" I nodded. "Well, lately, they've had to make cuts to conserve on the outflow of expenses, so today I was…let go."
"YOU WERE FIRED!" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Instant worries of how our family and Jeb were to survive without any money flowed through my mind over the course of a millisecond.
"Look, Max. I know you're worried, but I assure you. I will figure everything out, alright? There's no reason for you to be more of an adult than you have to be. I've slacked off enough, and it's time that I take control of situations. So sit back, relax, and be a teenager." I opened my mouth to protest but Jeb wasn't having it. "OKAY?"
"Fiiiiiinnnnnneeeeeeeee." I groaned. Turning around, I marched up the stairs, back into my room and flopped into bed.
If Jeb were a weather forecaster, then his predictions wouldn't even be in the same state as the proverbial ball park consistently, just like his "premonition" that everything would be okay. Each day Ari and I watched Jeb walk out the door with an air of confidence befitting of a man on a mission, and each day Ari and I watched Jeb slouch back into the house bearing the weight of defeat. It was a pathetic display to watch, one that repeated over and over again throughout those first few days of summer. It came to the point that Jeb's confidence gradually shrank overtime so that he slouched both in and out the door. His chocolate, vibrant eyes faded to a dull greyish-brown, eerily resembling the eyes of the drunken madman he once was. Every time I thought about it, I shuddered.
For reasons I'll never understand, I no longer felt that it was entirely safe in the house for me and Ari. As often as I could, I would have us hang out at Fang's house. Call it woman's intuition, paranoia, superstition, whatever the hell you like, but whenever we were there, I felt like I could breathe again without feeling suffocated. Or maybe I just liked being with my boyfriend. Either way, you won't find me complaining.
"Hey, Max." I snapped out of my thoughts and landed my attention back on said boyfriend. Glancing to my right, I saw Ari talking with Angel and let out a breath I didn't even know I had been holding. Once again, we were at Fang's house and he had been telling me about how he was trying to buy this sick new motorcycle he saw in the shop the today.
"So I met with El Chapo the other day." Fang raised his eyebrows and cocked his head at me.
"That's nice, babe." I said absent mindedly as I tried to reign my thoughts in.
"Are you even listening to me?" He didn't sound angry, just concerned, which was the final pull I needed to give him my full attention.
"Yeah." I nodded my head, trying to sound convincing, even though I wasn't fooling anyone. "So, you were saying you met El Chapo the other day?"
"Max…" Fang looked me dead in the eyes and held my gaze. "Is everything okay? And don't try to hide it. I know you too well, Maximum Ride."
The way he said my name and looked me in the eyes—into my soul—I could tell that he could see right through me and into all my secrets. "It's nothing, I swear." Fang rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. He didn't buy it. Hell, I wouldn't buy it. "Really, Fang. It's nothing. I'm just making a mountain out of a mole hill, that's all."
"In order for there to be a mole hill to make a mountain out of, there has to be a problem. Spill."
Wise words from a kid just out of high school, I thought to myself. "Alright, alright. Don't get your panties in a wad. But like I said, it's nothing really. I just feel a little uneasy, that's all."
"Uneasy? What do you mean?" Fang leaned forward and studied me more closely.
"I mean…I feel like something bad is gonna happen, you know." I shrugged awkwardly, not finding the correct words to express how I felt without spilling the specific "beans" that I didn't want to spill.
"No, I really don't know. Are you feeling nervous about college and stuff?" Fang cocked his head to the side and arched his right eyebrow.
"No, it's just…it's just hard to explain, that's all." In frustration, I got up and walked out of the living room, up the stairs, and into Fang's room. Sitting on his bed, I placed my head in my hands and closed my eyes. Soon afterward, I heard footsteps and for once I knew that Fang was standing next to me without having to look up. The sound of squeaking springs followed the slight sinking in the bed as Fang sat next to me. I felt his warm hand rubbing my back up and down. "Talk to me, Max. Please." His feathery breath whispered in my ear, causing a slight ripple of chill to creep wherever his hands touched my back.
Sighing, I ran my hands through my hair, sat up, and looked at him. I opened my mouth, but hesitated. It wasn't that I didn't want to tell Fang anything or that I didn't trust him, it's just that I was so used to hiding things from people that honesty no longer came easily. I had to push it out of my system violently, and the scarier the reality was, the more pain I felt to say it. Telling Fang about my father was the ultimate infliction of discomfort. And no matter how badly I wanted to tell Fang everything, my yearning for painlessness was much stronger. So I did the only thing I could do, the only thing I was good at. I lied.
"Like I said before, it's nothing really. I feel uneasy and worried, like…like something bad is going to happen. I know I'm just making a big deal out of nothing, but I can't help but feel…sick to my stomach." Technically I hadn't lied, just withheld some of the truth.
Fang knitted his eyebrows together. "Is there a reason why you're feeling like that?"
"Um, well…like I said before, it's no big deal, but a little while ago, my dad lost his job.
"WHAT?!" Fang's eyes ballooned to popping size, and I was afraid that they were going to do just that.
FANG POV
"WHAT?!" I could feel my eyes growing to the size of watermelons and I was pretty sure that if a gentle breeze blew against them, they would burst into a million pieces.
"Calm. Down. Like I said, it's no big deal." Max tried to soothe me by holding my hand, but I shot off my bed and whirled around at her.
"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN CALM DOWN? THIS IS NOT A SITUATION TO BE CALM ABOUT!" Generally, I'm not much of a worry-wart, but I could feel the hairs on my neck rise and goosebumps forming.
"FANG. CHILL. OUT. IF I'M NOT WORRIED, THEN YOU SURE AS HELL SHOULDN'T BE." Great. Now I'd made her mad. Just perfect.
Flopping down back on my bed, I grumbled, "Sorry."
Sighing, Max just shook her head. "It's alright. And like I've been trying to tell you this entire time, I'm not worried. You see, my dad is a bioengineer and I'd bet businesses are lining up left and right to hire him."
Yeah, like it's that simple, I scoffed to myself. I opened my mouth to say just that, but right as the first word was coming out, I paused. Narrowing my eyes, I examined Max, watching her face, seeing her reactions, studying everything about her. I realized two things. One of which was the normal vibe I constantly got off her that she was hiding something. The other thing was much more alarming. She was scared.
I've seen Max scared before. I've seen her get scared over mid-terms and finals, over future plans and headaches, over relationships and me. But on those rare moments that I've seen her truly scared, she has this look on her face. Her eyes crinkle, her smile is too wide, her nose is slightly flared, and her eyebrows twitch. And studying her face now, I could see that she wasn't just scared—she was terrified.
Taking her hands in mine, I leaned close and looked deep into her eyes. "Max. Please. Let me help you." I could see her façade waver, her walls crumble slightly. I pushed on. "Tell me what's wrong." Just as I felt her walls finally begin to fully give way, I sensed her resolve fortify in strength, and her walls became much, much higher, too high for even me to climb in one go.
"Like I said, I'm just a little worried about my dad, that's all. It's no big deal." Shrugging her shoulders, she stood up and began to walk out of my room. I felt an urge to stand up and grab her, never let her go, protect her from whatever it was that was going on, shield her from any pain. But it was obvious that she didn't want me to do any of that. Or she couldn't. Either way, she'd tell me when she was ready, or not at all. I just hoped that it wouldn't be too late.
As she was about to open the door, she paused. Talking over her shoulder, she said, "Fang. I need you to promise me one—no two things."
"Sure. Whatever you like." I stood up and slowly walked towards her.
"First of all, Ari doesn't know about Jeb's joblessness, so could you keep it between us?" I couldn't help but raise my eyebrows at that, but who was I to judge.
"Alright. Consider my lips sealed." By then, I was standing next to her. "What's the second promise?" I said gently.
"The second promise is…a bit more complicated." Once again, Max paused. She took a deep breath and continued. "If I'm right and something bad does happen, I want you to promise me that you'll take care of Ari."
"Max, that's goes without saying-"
"I know that you'll look out for him, but what I want you to promise me is that you'll take care of him." Max whirled around to look at me, and the look on her face spoke volumes.
"What, do you mean "take care of him" as in take him in?" Now my brows were sky high and pushing past the limit. "Max it won't come to that."
"You don't know that!" Max yelled.
"But I do!" I countered. "I promise you, this time next week, your dad's gonna have an even better job and your family will be living the dream."
MAX POV
"I know that you'll look out for him, but what I want you to promise me is that you'll take care of him." My body felt like it was in slow motion compared to my thoughts. I didn't want to say my worries out loud for fear that they'll come true—and also a fear of a hell called "foster care"—but I didn't want to leave Ari unprotected and vulnerable. Although I liked to paint myself as the invincible older sister, but I was really just the pathetic teenage girl who was way out of her league. An inner war inside of me was waging and it was unclear which side was winning.
I need to tell him. I thought to myself. If I don't tell him now, it might be too late. Besides, if I don't tell him, he'll be more than mad; he'll be crushed.
You can't protect everyone, Max, the inner Voice inside of me rang out like the tempting voice of Satan.
Pushing my conflicting thoughts aside, I refocused on the task at hand. Like I said, I needed to know that I could depend on Fang to look out for Ari and shelter him if need be.
"What, do you mean "take care of him" as in take him in?" I could see Fang's eyebrows shoot up almost as fast as basketball players get their growth spurts. "Max it won't come to that." Why was he trying to console me when I was inconsolable? Didn't he see that his efforts were pointless, that there was no way to "fix" my situation with pretty words and empty promises? I didn't need a hug or a kiss, despite how good Fang was at both of these. What I needed was a safety net, something to ensure that I wouldn't have to be stressed out of my mind with worry over Ari. Something that sounded eerily similar to an empty promise, built on hopes and dreams of things that don't quite make the cut to reality. But what else was I supposed to do, huh? There was no time for moping around hoping for the best. The best that I could do was make an empty promise or two. But this knowledge still didn't help me keep my temper in check.
"You don't know that!" I yelled.
"But I do!" Fang countered. "I promise you, this time next week, your dad's gonna have an even better job and your family will be living the dream." I don't know what I was expecting him to say, but it sure as hell wasn't that. And I guess it showed on my face because Fang's hopeful look gave way once again to worry over me. "Hey. Like I said, everything will be okay. I'll look out for Ari."
"Promise me." My voice cracked. I could feel my walls faltering once again and all I needed was a simple "I promise" so that I could be on my way before I embarrassed myself by breaking down into tears.
"I promise. I swear on my life that I'll take care of Ari in the case of an emergency and that I will protect you." I was about to open my mouth to tell him not to joke around about this, but when I looked into his eyes, I could tell that he was taking this very seriously. His dark eyes were steely and his tone had morphed from worry to resolve. Smiling slightly to myself, I told myself that I could relax, breathe, and not worry. But for some reason, I couldn't squeeze out a single breath or lift any of the weight of my anxiety. Pretty soon, my smile disappeared as well, drowning under a sea of worries and resurfacing troubles.
You're a dead man walking, Maximum, the Voice inside of me whispered, and a chill rippled violently throughout my body.
Avoiding eye contact, I mumbled, "Thank you" and gently shoved past Fang out the door, into the hallway, and down the stairs. Before I knew it, I was calling for Ari and rushing him out the door, mumbling how we had to get home before dinner. Even though I was supposed to feel relieved and happy, I didn't. I just felt dead inside.
That was three weeks ago. Three weeks before I fell into a mild depression. Three weeks before Ari complained nonstop about being suffocated in the house and not seeing Angel. Three weeks before Jeb bought his first few cans of booze. And it was all downhill from there, all the way down to the darkest recess of hell.
TO BE CONTINUED…
So…yeah. Cliffhangers, you gotta love 'em! For all those people out there in the world wondering why writers have cliffhangers, the answer is simple: because we love messing with people! Yeah, we're assholes, but you still buy our books! Anywhoooooo…So I hoped y'all liked this chappy! Warning for the next couple of chappies: things are going to get VERY dark VERY fast. Can't wait! I love hearing from you guys and I wanna hear MORE so if you love reading this as much as I love writing this, say so in the comments or DM me. Please, please, please, please, PLEASE follow and favorite this fanfic and I hope you guys come back for more! And since I'm on summer vacation now, I can actually WRITE! YAYYYYYYY! So yeah, I love you all and have an AWESOME, SPECTACULAR, NOT-SO-DARK-AND-GRIM DAY!
Watch the skies,
Doctor Bessy