Case Files of Our Lives

Title: Case Files of Our Lives

Author: MYBIGBLUEBOX

Series: C.S.I

Rating: T

Genre: angst/comfort

Spoilers: none

Characters: Gil Grissom and Sara Sidle

Disclaimer: God knows how many times you've all read these disclaimers but I'm going to say it all again just coz. I don't own these characters they are all property of channel 5, CBS productions and the writer. Also a bit of the song, Do you believe in love is used. This belongs to Craig David and Windswept Music Ltd.

Summary: Gil and Sara talk about their pasts, Sara has nightmares. Take note of the rating please. Bad language, rape subject and violence through out.

Dedications: Everyone who's read anything I've done over the years and gave their constructive criticism.

Warnings: very violent and a strong reference to rape. Bad language and despair. Explores the feelings of rape victims so please mind the rating, if you are affected by any of these subjects.

NOTE: Thank you fed-up-reader for your review about my spelling. I have double checked my work for mistakes. I was quiet hurt by the harsh comments you put in your review. I try to make my work as good as possible, but I don't think you needed to be quiet so nasty. I don't mind criticism but I DO mind pointlessly nasty reviews. Thank you for taking the time to review and read my piece.

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I awoke to Craig David's Do You Believe In Love playing on the radio in the kitchen of Grissom's apartment. How the hell'd I get here? Last thing I remember is Ecklie's face. I shudder involuntarily, not the nicest thing to remember. I strained my ears to hear to quite verses of the song. Is that Grissom? SINGING!...It is!

'Just one day,

If I could hold you in my arms,

Close to my heart where you belong,

Love of my life you really are,

Still be showering you with kisses like snow in winter...'

All I could do is listen . Dare I believe he's singing about me? If he was I think I would be the happiest woman alive, despite all that's happened. He's actually quite good. If he was singing about me what would that mean for us? It would be a dream come true, if I could have him back again. He's coming down the corridor . If he sees I'm awake he might stop. I don't want him to stop, fro this moment I can pretend he's singing to me.

'Just one day,

If I could touch your face again,

Words can't describe how I'm feeling,

If I could turn back the hands of time,

I'd still be holding on wishes that you left behind.'

He's leaning against the door jam to his own bedroom, arms folded against his chest. Watching me breath, laying in his bed. My heart racing, making me feel light, but I'm not afraid. How could I be afraid of Grissom? I turn over and face him, showing him that I'm awake and listening. He falters at first unsure if he should keep singing or not.

'Remember moments when there was nothing better than,

A stroll in the park walking hand in hand,

I'll never forget the times we talked about me and you,

The things we do, together, forever.'

'You hungry?' Am I! I realise that I haven't eaten in about a day and I'm starving. I nod at him shyly. I'm still very quiet and reluctant to speak, I don't really know why. Maybe I don't want to talk about what happened, by keeping my mouth closed nothing will slip out., igniting conversation. I feel like I'm seven years old again.

I crawl out of bed and follow Grissom into his beautiful kitchen. It's five pm, I can't believe I slept that long, I suppose I'm still a little drugged up with what they gave me for the pain at the hospital. We gather up our plates of green salad, (I guess Griss remembered I'm a vegetarian after all) and make ourselves comfortable on the couch. There's a forensic show on, we eat in a comfortable silence, commenting now and then on our pet suspects liability. I didn't realise until it was too late that I was snuggled under Grissom's arm, that was flung over my shoulder. He didn't make any move to get away from this incredibly domestic position so I shrugged mentally and settled back to enjoy the comfort he gave me.

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Two hours later I yawned deeply. I didn't want to move from under Grissom's protective body but I needed a shower and some sleep. I know full well that my sleep will be full of nightmares but I can't help that, I've dealt with them since I was a child, I'll deal with them now. I gently eased myself out from under Grissom and made my way down the hall to the bathroom.

'Hey, where are you going?' Grissom called after me, I could almost hear the pout in his voice, making me smile.

'Shower and then bed if that's o.k. with you.' I heard him move off the couch and into his room, I leaned against the door waiting for what ever he was bringing me. He returned with fresh towels and his bath robe. I forgot I didn't have a change of clothes.

'Thanks Griss, I don't think I've thanked you once today for what you've done for me. I really appreciate it.' We stood close to each other, taking a minuet to revel in the scent of each other. He reaches up and for one breath taking second I thought he was leaning in to kiss me, he pulled away at the last minuet to squeeze me hand.

'You know I don't mind looking after you. Go have your shower, I'll make a bed up for you.'

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It felt so good to be clean at last, I was finally out of Ecklie's clutches. His marks still covered my body. I touched the raw skin puckered with the ugly black thread of stitching. There didn't seem to be an inch of her body that hadn't been damaged in some way. It made her shudder every time she touched a mark. Exiting the bathroom I made my way to the couch, expecting Grissom to have gone to bed a while ago. I was surprised to see him curled up asleep on the couch, I tiptoed over to him and placed a light kiss to his forehead, I would never have got as far as I have without him, it's only been one day. I pad off down the hall to the bedroom.

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Dull screams echoed down the corridor and hit my ear drums bringing me out of a deep sleep. I knew this would happen, but I can't blame her. I throw off the blanket that is suffocating me as fast as I can and pelt down the hall. I pause in the doorway, frozen where I stand. She's screaming, sobbing curled in a tight ball, fists flying fighting of what to me appeared to be the air, but to her she was fighting of Ecklie.

I made my way over to the side of the bed and take her hands in mine, kissing the palms.

'Sara? Sar? Come on wake up honey.' Her eyes snapped open, frightened and unfocused. More tears fall down her already and soaked face. God this is like hell for both of us. I take her in my arms and let her cry into my shoulder for what seems like the hundredth time in the past twenty four hours. Running my hand through her hair I mutter what I hope to be soothing nonsense into her ear.

'It's o.k. it's o.k. sweetheart, it's just a dream, it's o.k. Your safe here.' It seems like hours before she calms downs enough to let me fetch her a drink. She sips in the dim light the bed side lamp gives. I can just make out the shine of her beautiful hair. Still wrapped in my bathrobe she cuddles against my side. I'm not going to leave her alone tonight, sod the damn rules. I want to be there when she wakes up. I put my arm around her delicate shoulders, settling back against the headboard. I play with a strand of her silky hair.

'Griss? Tell me about your family. I want to know about you, about them.' I sat in silence for a moment unsure where to start. Suddenly I knew.

'You wanna know about me? Well I suppose I best start with Alice.' So begins the case file of our lives.

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O.k. so I have checked and re-checked my spelling. I hope you enjoy this new chapter. Please review.