Summary: "Why?"… "Why?"… "Oh, that's why." Starting after 10.08, "The Brain Bowl Incubation," this is a series of post episode stories to fill in some of the gaps of season 10. Each chapter should be able to stand on its own, but they also go together as parts of a larger story. Future chapters will, in large part, be shaped by whatever happens on the show.

Chapter 4, post-ep for 10.11, "The Birthday Synchronicity": Sheldon whips out his wand and explores Amy's 'Chamber of Secrets', conjuring up some birthday magic for his foxy teakettle.

—

I.

Alohomora, Sheldon thinks to himself, waving his wand in the direction of their apartment door and shooing Amy towards it.

His unlocking charm proves successful when she turns the knob to grant them entrance to 4B. She assisted the matter with a key, of course, but he isn't going to let that ruin the illusion. They hustle inside, and Sheldon is pleased to see the broad smile on her face. She seems happy, and he hopes that she is looking forward to the remainder of her birthday as much as he is.

He closes the door behind them and turns to face it. With another flick of his wand, this time he chances speaking out loud, hoping that she might play along with him. "Repello Muggletum."

Amy snorts and sets down her bag of souvenirs. He can feel the rough fabric of her Hufflepuff hat brush against his forearm as she ducks under his wand-wielding arm. "A muggle-repelling charm is suitable under the circumstances, but perhaps we should make use of this boring old door lock as well."

"Agreed," Sheldon says with a nod.

While Amy twists the deadbolt with her free hand, she flicks her wand and adds, "Colloportus." Hearing her cast a spell makes him even more enthusiastic for what the evening might entail.

She turns back to him with her head cocked and one eyebrow raised. There should be no further interruptions this evening, but a locked door and an anti-muggle incantation can't have hurt their chances. As he looks at Amy's expectant face and ponders the optimal way to begin the festivities, he spots something on top of a nearby bookshelf, something that he had purchased the day before but forgotten about in the haste of their crazy day.

He stretches out his arm to its fullest extent, and with the aid of his long wand, he finds that he is able to cover most of the distance to point out his target. "Orchideous."

Amy shifts her attention in the direction that he is aiming and takes a few short steps over. "Flowers? They're beautiful, Sheldon. Thank you!" Leaning her face down, she smells the colorful blossoms. "I'm quite the lucky birthday girl today—a romantic fMRI brain scan, a healthy new pseudo-niece, a trip to 'The Wizarding World of Harry Potter', and now flowers."

"Have you perchance been brewing some liquid luck—the Felix Felicis potion?"

Amy stands back to her full height and smirks. "No. But with less than one hour of my birthday left, I'm still holding out hope that I'll get lucky anyway." She points her thumb in the direction of their bedroom. "To that end, perhaps we should make our way to the Room of Requirement. It should have everything that we need."

Sheldon smiles, relieved and grateful that she is making things easy for him. Sometimes it still makes him nervous when he thinks about it, but physical intimacy with Amy always ends up feeling natural when they are in the moment. He pulls off his scarf and plucks the hat off of her head, an action that leaves her hair a mess. She doesn't seem to mind, though, nor does she mind when he wraps his arm around her waist and starts making chugga-chugga train noises. "All aboard the Hogwarts Express."

She laughs while they shuffle the short distance to their room.

"Lumos Maxima," he says when he hits the light switch, filling their bedroom with the soft light of a floor lamp.

It's not until he closes the door behind them and turns to face her that her quiet laughter calms down to a gentle smile. "It appears that you've taken me someplace magical."

"That's the plan," he admits.

While she begins walking in a slow circle around him, Amy taps her wand against her chin in a contemplative fashion. "You're not wearing an invisibility cloak, but I suppose I could still allow you to come visit my restricted section."

He can't believe that she's been holding out on him like that! "You have books that you won't let me read?"

Amy's steps come to a halt, and she reaches up to gently brush his cheek with the backs of her fingers. "Of course not. That was a euphemism, Sheldon."

It takes him a second, but he soon figures it out. "Oh, I see. You're suggesting an exploration of your 'Chamber of Secrets', as it were."

"Exactly."

"Well, I can assure you that as an adult wizard in full possession of my mental faculties, I am more than capable of choosing to peruse my mate's 'restricted section', assuming that she is amenable."

"Oh, she's amenable, for sure."

As always, he has to stoop down to kiss her. She stretches to wrap her arms around his neck, but even when she's on her tiptoes, he towers over her. Their kiss intensifies, and as he presses up close to her, he accidentally pokes her with his wand a few times. It isn't long before he is forced to stop and catch his breath.

Taking a step back from her, Sheldon strokes the length of his wand while he considers what spell to cast next. Amy waits patiently, though he can see her eyes tracking the slow movement of his hand. Only one thing comes to mind as the obvious next step. The birthday girl is wearing far too many clothes for coitus to be feasible. He runs the tip of his wand down the zipper on her Hufflepuff sweatshirt and utters a revealing charm. "Aparecium."

Tilting her head and biting her lip, Amy slowly sets her wand on the bed before beginning to unzip her sweatshirt. As she removes that garment and gets to work on the rest of her attire, she says, "Aparecium is a spell that's used to reverse a concealment charm. I'm not sure that it would work on a physical item like clothing. I think you would need an incantation that interacts with the tangible world rather than one that interacts with magic itself."

Her nitpicking attention to the authenticity of their play is almost as arousing to him as the sight of her increasingly revealed body. The combination makes him feel like he's been hit with a confundus hex. He stares at her, unmoving, until she has run out of garments to remove.

It's no surprise to him that Amy notices his stunned state, and of course she knows the counter spell. Picking up her wand, she nudges his midsection and says, "Rennervate."

His head jerks as he snaps himself out of it. A little embarrassed at having been caught gaping at her, he isn't quite sure what to say.

Fortunately, it seems that Amy does know what to say. "Accio Sheldon's current attire."

He has to admit to himself that her spell is more legitimate than his. If she'd been vague and said 'Sheldon's clothes' then he would've had to hand her all of the clothing from his drawers and laundry basket, and that might've ruined the mood a little bit. But as expected, her spell is precise in both accuracy and specificity. Her breadth of magical knowledge makes him wonder how she could have ever been sorted as a Hufflepuff and not a Ravenclaw.

In any case, he is happy to obey her command. After setting down his wand, he removes his robe and hands it over to her. One at a time, he continues to remove articles of clothing and pass them to the woman who has summoned them to her.

Fastidious as ever, she sorts each garment that he gives her. Most of them are set into their laundry basket, but she folds his robe and places it on her dresser next to her own discarded Hufflepuff garb. The orderliness of her actions soothes some anxious part of his brain that he can't name. Amy would no doubt be able to identify it, but he doesn't want to interrupt the proceedings to ask her.

Having lived with her for a few months now, he is familiar with the sight of her naked body, and he knows that she has ogled his form on many occasions as well. Nevertheless, he finds himself feeling shy. From their many make out sessions, he knows exactly how to get past the feeling before it overwhelms him. He reaches down and takes his wand in hand again. "Accio Amy."

She closes the small space between them in an instant, and he pulls her into a hug. Physical contact almost always leaves him unsettled rather than comforted, but Amy has never even come close to following his brain's typical rules and patterns. She throws exception flags all over his mind's internal coding, and as such, the warm press of her skin against his is nothing but pleasant.

Her lips feel soft where she presses a kiss over his heart, and her eyes look shiny when she tilts her head up. "You don't have to say Accio to make me come, Sheldon."

Before he can figure out why she would say that, he is distracted by several gentle kisses to his neck and chin that culminate in one substantial kiss to his lips. Her bare hips feel soft and smooth when he runs his hands over them, as does the rest of her posterior. Amy gasps into his open mouth and pulls back far enough to say, "I'm starting to feel like I've been hit with the Jelly-Legs Curse."

That's easy enough to remedy. Sheldon holds on to her tightly and turns so that his back is facing the bed. His wand is pressed up between them, assuring that his spell will hit them both. "Everte Statum."

This hex throws the target backwards, and the two of them land in a cozy heap on their bed after Sheldon tips over with her tucked snugly against his chest. Amy makes a squeaking shout at the motion, but her surprised face morphs into a smile when she realizes what he has done. She takes the wand from his hand and says, "We should be careful not to break this. And as you know, 'just because you can do magic now doesn't mean you have to whip your wand out for every tiny little thing'."

Sheldon recognizes the quote right away. She examines his wand, running her index finger along its length, and when she begins to speak again, he recognizes some of her next words as well.

" 'Rather thicker than one usually sees…quite rigid…' a perfectly serviceable length." She places their wands together on the far side of the bed. "I think we're done with these for now."

He agrees, "Yes, I've heard that charming a witch isn't all about wandwork."

The way that Amy looks down and eyes his nether regions makes him wonder if she's still thinking about wands at all. "Perhaps not, but proper wandwork doesn't hurt a wizard's cause on that front."

If that's the case, he's not sure why she put their wands away. It'll be fine, though. Sheldon knows that a powerful wizard can cast a spell without one and can even do magic without speaking the words aloud.

Amy's body is still sprawled halfway on top of his from their fall, leaving her in a useful position for him to get back to kissing her and running his hands all over her skin. They may have only had coitus one time, but they've made out often enough that he knows which areas provide her with the most stimulation. It always strikes him as convenient that the areas he most enjoys touching and kissing are the same ones that seem to provide her with the most pleasure.

He's been feeling quite stimulated himself for some time now, and he's sure that it has not escaped Amy's attention. When one of her busy hands finally makes contact with his own most preferred area of stimulation, she pulls back from his mouth to speak. "It appears that you have been subjected to a persistent Engorgement Charm this evening."

Thrilled by both her touches and the fact that she has decided to continue with their game, he can't hold back a happy gasp. The pleasure is intense enough that he can't resist letting her stroke him for a while, even though he knows that he must pull away soon. He doesn't want her to end up with the wrong kind of birthday surprise on her hands, so to speak.

When he can't wait any longer and twists his hips away, he sees the grin on her face grow wider. "This is fun. I can make you moan more than Myrtle's ghost, and I bet we can turn our quiet little room into the Shrieking Shack before the night is over."

With her hands now occupied applying caresses to his chest and shoulders, Sheldon finds it a bit easier to think. He rolls her underneath him. "You're right again, Miss Farrah Fowler." Raising his right arm, he waves it in the direction of their closed door. "Muffliato. That should keep any potential nosy listeners at bay. Feel free to screech like a mandrake if the need arises."

She nudges her hips up into his own a few times, a rhythmic motion that generates some compelling friction. It's impossible to stop himself from gyrating back at her. "I can feel the need arising as we speak," she says.

Sheldon can too. Unfortunately, reality must intrude to interrupt them one final time. He prepared by purchasing condoms months ago, but the inconvenience of stopping to put one on can't be avoided. With hasty, fumbling movements, he forces himself to pull away from her and sit up, intending to take care of the matter as quickly as possible.

The first one rips when he isn't careful enough tearing the package open. "It's too bad that there's no magic spell for birth control," he says. "I wonder what the words would be for such a thing. Fetus nonconceivus?"

He's not joking, but Amy looks amused anyway. "I would've thought you'd be a big fan of condoms, Sheldon. In fact, sometimes I'm still surprised that you don't opt for a full-body latex suit when we're being intimate."

It's by no means a graceful process, but by taking more care with the second one, he is able to get it on. He wrinkles his nose at Amy's last statement even as he crawls back over to her. "You know my feelings on the subject of our future progeny. As such, I consider any such barriers unnecessary."

"Baby-us not today-us," she says, making it clear that she hasn't changed her mind about that yet.

"Technically there has already been a baby today."

"Not one that we are responsible for. Besides, that's not what I meant about the latex."

"Oh. If you're instead referring to my issues with germs, I would've thought you'd have figured that out by now. It's no longer a relevant concern when it comes to you. After years of increasing physical contact, I've come to accept that we're more or less sharing a single microbial ecosystem at this point."

This time Amy wrinkles her nose. "I can't decide if that's beautiful or revolting."

He shrugs. "Let's just call it true."

Last year he learned that it's easier if he lets her control the docking procedures, so Sheldon tugs on her hips to encourage her to roll over on top of him. She must've decided to consider his previous statement beautiful, because she is back to smiling at him as she straddles his hips.

He would return her smile if he could, but he is too distracted with awe at the sight of her beginning to fit their bodies together. Once she has succeeded, she leans down to kiss him, smooshing their chests together too. She must feel just as eager as he does, because she begins to shift her pelvis right away.

Though his mind is blank of anything brilliant to say for their game, he continues to feel caught up in the magical aura of the experience. When Amy sits back up, her new position makes it impossible to kiss her. It does, however, allow him the opportunity to enjoy the sight of her moving above him. She is quiet for a few long moments, but eventually she reaches over and traces her finger across his forehead, whispering, "Legilimens."

That spell is no small demand at a time like this. Legilimency allows a witch or wizard to delve into the mind of another person, giving them access to that person's most private thoughts, memories, and emotions. He's already literally stripped himself bare to share his body with her, and even though it makes him nervous, he's not opposed to sharing his mind with her in a similar way. In fact, it's quite in line with their recent make out sessions.

"You can block me with Occlumency," Amy adds, slowing the movement of her hips to a near halt while she speaks. "I'd love to know what you're thinking about while we do this, but it's okay if you don't want to."

His voice comes out sounding shaky. "I don't want to block you. I love you." He swallows hard, trying to shove aside his apprehension. "I'm only worried that I'll say something I shouldn't."

"It will be fine. I promise I won't get upset no matter what you tell me. I just want to hear you."

He believes her. "Okay."

It's hard to sort through all of the swirling thoughts in his head, and he soon gives up, deciding to simply say whatever runs through his brain. It seems like the appropriate course of action anyway. Legilimency doesn't allow for censorship.

With every other slow slide of his body into hers, he shares a fragmented piece of his thoughts. "This feels perfect… I remember this from last year… All of it… It's way past my bedtime… I should feel sleepy… I like to watch your breasts when you move… I'm not supposed to say something like that."

Amy grunts and digs her little fingers into his shoulders. It doesn't stop him from continuing to speak. "I want to make train noises again… But you wouldn't laugh if I did it now… I don't like feeling out of control… It's okay if it's just with you… I didn't think I could ever do this… I'm glad I'm not a house elf… I am fond of one dirty sock though… My thoughts sound weird even to me."

He has to stop for a second when the shaking movements caused by Amy's sudden giggles create a bit too much stimulation. "I'm loving your thoughts," she assures him, shifting her upper body close enough that she can place a kiss on his forehead. "You have the best brain."

Hugging her tightly to his chest to prevent her from wiggling, it takes all of his concentration to calm down. When he can stand it again, he loosens his hold on her and they resume their combined rhythm. His superior brain soon reminds him that it's a good idea to slide a hand down between them at this point. Amy's breath catches for a second when his fingers make contact with the correct target.

In the brief moments when he can manage to work around his gasping breaths, he continues to talk to her. "I love your brain too… I can't finish yet… It's too soon… I hate when people write 'should of' when they mean 'should've'… It doesn't even make sense… It's been 366 days since we last did this… I don't like leap years… I wonder if I'll be able to think about anything but this tomorrow… It stuck in my head last year… Scary… I felt mindless… Like an engineer."

The words coming out of his mouth slow further even as his lower body picks up the pace. "No one had better interrupt us now… You're going to be on the other side of this spell someday… You better count on it…" It's becoming almost impossible to speak. He can only choke out a few more words, "I hope you're having a happy birthday."

"I'm very happy," she insists, her voice sounding adamant despite her labored breathing. "I'm so, so happy. The happiest. There isn't a strong enough word."

Before he can even try to get back to his babbling and tell her that he understands that feeling, she presses an enthusiastic kiss to his lips. He's glad that he doesn't have to try to form words while her body tightens around his where they are joined. He pulls her hips down firmly to his own while she squirms above him and groans into his open mouth. Within less than a minute he can feel the hard, squeezing pulses of her climax, and once again he finds himself thankful that his mouth is too occupied with hers to be able to speak. It would be impossible to describe what is going through his mind without sounding terribly vulgar.

In time she pulls her mouth away from his and buries her flushed face against his neck. He can feel her hot, panting breaths close to his sensitive ear while she recovers. It's difficult to remain patient, but he slows down his movements as much as he can and waits for her to come around. Instead of distracting her with more of his thoughts, it somehow feels right to him to stay quiet now.

Once she has caught her breath at last, she tilts her head back far enough to meet his eyes and then whispers in his ear, "Mmm. Ten points to Gryffindor!"

—

II.

It's likely to be a fanciful bit of imagination on her part, but Amy could swear that the light from their kitchen window is somehow brighter this morning. She takes a bite of toast and watches Sheldon pour himself a bowl of cereal in the kitchen. He appears deep in thought, which is not unusual. What is unusual is that he has so far stayed quiet about it. After adding milk to his bowl and getting out a spoon, he makes his way over and takes a seat across from her at their tiny dining table.

They're both fully dressed to face the day, but that doesn't stop Amy's mind from flipping through memories of last night's coital dalliance. Sheldon is staring at her while he takes slow bites of his cereal, and she wonders if he is doing the same thing. Though it's tempting to ask him about it, she feels like she has pried into his thoughts enough as of late, and it seems best to wait out his quiet mood. She doesn't have to wait long.

Once he has finished the final two bites of his breakfast, he sets his spoon down in his empty bowl and meets her eyes with his own. "Amy, are we weird?"

That's an interesting opener. Unsure of what he's really trying to ask her, there's only one response that leaps to mind. "We've been together for over six years and you're just wondering that now?"

He frowns. "I'm being serious."

She tilts her head while she considers it. "I think something like that is very subjective. Weirdness, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. To be fair, though, most of those who behold us do tend to think we're unusual."

"I mean with regard to our… intimate activities. We carry on some rather interesting conversations in those moments. I can't say I've ever felt a single speck of regret about any of it, but I can't help wondering. Are we some kind of deviant perverts?"

Amy has to bite her tongue so that she doesn't smile and make light of his concerns. It makes perfect sense to her that a man who was raised in a conservative religious household might have some qualms the morning after engaging in extensive Harry-Potter-themed fornication.

"No, we're not. Enjoying one another's minds along with our bodies does not strike me as deviant in the slightest. People tend to label perversions as whatever activities they don't happen to engage in, but I think being judgmental about others' intimate choices is nonsense. We are adults choosing freely and hurting no one. That's all that matters by my moral standards."

She's pleased to see more color in his cheeks, and he's starting to lose the serious expression that was stuck on his face. "That seems fair."

"It's more than fair. I love how we are together. I think it's hot, and I couldn't care less if someone might consider it strange. Besides, no one has to know what goes on between us other than you and me."

"You won't tell the girls?"

"That we've had whimsical and inventive sex that rocked my world? No, I suppose I can keep it to myself."

Sheldon smiles at that, and if she's not mistaken, it looks like there's a hint of arrogant pride in his shiny eyes. "We are rather… hot."

That word sounds so wrong coming out of his mouth, but that only makes her enjoy hearing it all the more. "We are indeed. And maybe our path together has been different than what most people go through, but at this point it all feels perfect to me."

His smile begins to fade and a few creases appear on his forehead. Biting his lip, he shifts his gaze down towards his lap and starts absentmindedly folding his napkin. Taken together, it's a combination of actions that she can only interpret as anxiety. That seems incongruous considering their conversation. Amy can't think of a single thing she's said that would have him feeling anything other than reassured.

After a few seconds he releases his lip, but he doesn't look at her when he starts to speak. "I am aware that one year between instances of coitus is far from what most would consider perfect. Are you sure that you've been content with that arrangement?"

There's nothing quite like starting the day with a fully loaded question like that. Amy's not sure what he is hoping to hear from her. It doesn't matter, though, because the truth is the truth regardless, and she isn't going to lie to him. This isn't a conversation that she wants to have with the top of his head, so she tugs the napkin out of his hands to capture his attention. She waits until she can see the blue of his eyes before she starts to address him.

"Sheldon, I love to be close to you in whatever way we choose to be together. Coitus is special, but so are all of our other intimate encounters. Making out can still end in a mutually satisfying way. I don't think that there is a right way or a wrong way for us to explore this part of our lives. Whatever we both feel comfortable with at any given time is what's right for us. Believe it or not, I'm not in a hurry for anything in our relationship."

He looks skeptical at that last part, and she can't really blame him. But there's a big difference between the years when she had only the tiniest hints of physical affection from him and what they have now.

Given his skepticism, she opts to elaborate. "I know that it wasn't always the case for me, but you're not the only one who has changed over the course of our relationship. I know now that we always get where we both want to be eventually, and it's not necessary for me to push you about any of it."

He tilts his head and squints at her, like he's sizing her up in some way. After an uncomfortable period of silent scrutiny, he finally asks, "What if we both decide that birthday coitus isn't enough?" She can usually read him pretty well, but the current expression on his face is an utter mystery to her. "I suppose we were canoodling well past midnight last night, so technically we're already in violation of that plan," he adds.

While Amy is genuinely content with their intimate relationship, the idea that Sheldon might be wanting more sends a little thrill down her spine. It's best not to get her hopes up, so she swallows down the squeak of glee that wants to escape her throat and stuffs aside the urge to stand up and do a victory dance.

She's proud of how calm her voice sounds when she conjures up a mature reply. "If we decide it's not enough, then we can find a new arrangement that suits us better."

Reaching across the table to take hold of his hand, she feels her heart flutter with happiness at the growing grin on his face and the eager way that he squeezes her hand back. "But I meant what I said before," she continues. "I am not in a hurry. I have learned to enjoy every step of our journey."

—-

Notes:

All the Harry Potter references and quotes that were sprinkled throughout this chapter belong to JK Rowling, of course.

I don't know where the show is going to go with the coitus issue, but I tried to make it clear in this story why it doesn't necessarily matter. Even though this would make a decent ending point, I'm leaning towards continuing this little series. Thanks again to everyone for reading. Have a great holiday season!