Because Chaitanya and I skipped our regularly scheduled meetings that day, I returned to my dorm early to find my roommate sitting in one of the bean bags, playing some zombie video game.

I grabbed my laptop and my Harsul's book and sat them next to each other on my bed. I went back and forth between the internet and the story, reading more into Kei's scenes, and getting this incredibly distinct feeling that Kei was a neutral party even though he claimed to be with the bender army.

Kei was cleverly aloof. Even Harsul got that impression of him. That he pretended not to know anything about war and strategies but only as a pretense for not participating.

But the bender army unquestionably trusted him. Only a handful of people knew of Harsul's role in the war, and Commander Katsu had trusted Kei enough to keep him looped in on their plans - even though Kei himself rarely actually did anything.

And when he did fight in battles, he didn't firebend.

As neutral as a soldier could get, especially a general.

But the internet confirmed he was one of the first generals to be recruited into Katsu's army. There was no evidence he needed to prove himself like the others who fought for his ranks. And since he was one of the first, shouldn't there be more information on him, not less?

I needed this all ordered in my head. Was I even connecting the dots right?

"Hey, Aki…" I said, reading a line from the book that described Kei's pride - a trait completely at odds with his apparent motivations and actions.

"Hmmm?" he asked, not turning away from his video games, sensing the distraction in my voice and deciding against giving me his full attention.

"Do you remember General Kei?"

"Uh, yeah. My squad was supposed to match up against one of his before the war ended."

It was easy to forget Aki was a year older than me and was forced to enlist for the last year. He was barely more than a recruit though, and most of his stories were of training and not the war itself.

But it did bring up an interesting point. Kei's squads frequently lost battles, and it was assumed to be bad leadership. But that begged the question - why did his battalions constantly sacrifice their lives for him, knowing they wouldn't succeed? And why was Kei allowed to continue being a general? And one that was allowed to know deep secrets at that?

"What do you know about him?"

Aki shrugged. "That he was young for a general, maybe the bender's youngest."

That would make sense since Chaitanya couldn't have been much older than me. But again, why make someone so young with no track record a general? Was he perhaps brilliant or powerful but secretive about his strengths?

Aki continued, "I heard he was a great shot but never had anyone among his ranks who was half as good. That he oversaw mostly fire and earth benders. Oh, and that he was a firebender himself."

"Who told you that? No one has ever seen him firebend, right?" Kei was never on the front lines.

Aki just shrugged. "Yeah, but it's clear that he was from the former Fire Nation, so what else would he be? Fire Nation citizens were the ones most against 'crossbreeding.'"

I frowned and stared at Kei's name in the book. "Would you say he was pretty incompetent as a leader then?"

Aki snorted. "Yeah, of course. The military rarely went up against him in battles, and when they did, he almost always lost. We always speculated that it was some warped tactic the benders had, but nope… He was just awful. That's why they always sent troops up against him."

None of this made sense.

"So if he was that bad, why did he hold back and never use his bending? He had to have been made a general for a reason."

"I dunno. Maybe he was secretly a Republic sympathizer? He sure did give us a lot of victories."

I hoped that was it. I hoped that if Chaitanya was General Kei that he was on our side the entire time.

But I felt like there was something I was missing. I wanted to force those two opposing personalities together, but I didn't have the piece between them. Chaitanya was quiet with more than just his voice - and guilty about the war, about giving up his comrades and fellow benders. I got that much from his conversation with the stranger. So it made sense that he would also be the general that gave us a lot of victories.

"But why did they make him a general? They had to be impressed somehow."

Aki set his controller down as he completed his level and laid back, watching his stats scroll by on the screen. "So he was powerful in some way. He proved himself to the other benders unquestionably. That's why they allowed him to keep screwing up. But what kind of bender hides his bending? And why would the others allow it?"

The silence stretched out between the two of us, and I slowly rose my head as Aki turned around and met my eyes.

"The avatar," I whispered.

Aki's eyes were wide disks, coming to the same conclusion.

It all snapped together. It was a perfect picture now. These two diametric forces were one absolute. General Kei was under pretense. The avatar was always the great unifier - a force of peace, ending wars that divided the world. If General Kei was the avatar, and if everything I knew was true, then his pride, cockiness, and screw-ups were all fake. It was all just a mask to keep him secret. He could have been coordinating with the other benders to end the war behind closed doors, but he must have known he couldn't do it by eradicating all non-benders. Maybe there was no peaceful conclusion where both sides could coexist. The benders would never stop being oppressive dictators and the avatar resented them for it.

"But if he was… Why didn't he just end the war?" Aki whispered as his next round started without him.

Maybe, somehow, with all the legends they tell of his incredible power, he was the one responsible to vanish all the other benders.

"I think he did."

My heart was pounding out of my chest.

If Chaitanya was… No, it couldn't be possible.

I kissed him.

If he was, I kissed the fucking avatar. Twice.

This was insane. This was out of my grasp. Chaitanya wasn't such a powerful person. The concept didn't connect in my head.

But there was a chance. It didn't matter how small, if it was true, now that I knew, I couldn't be safe. There's a reason why it was a secret - why no one knew. Because they were probably all dead.

Shit! Shit, what had I gotten myself into?

I quickly closed the laptop and the book and grabbed a towel. "I'm going to go to the bathroom," I said, rushing out of our room and to the community showers at the end of the hall. I stripped and hid behind the curtain before even turning on the shower, and when I had, I left it cool.

And I could feel myself breaking down, terrified for my life. I crouched down and put my face in my hands, trying to fight a trembling wail.

I had to leave. I had to run very far away. But on the chance he wasn't, I needed him to know- but I couldn't even risk that much. I didn't want to be around the bender. I didn't want to risk my life. I didn't want to die.

I couldn't tell Chaitanya goodbye. After everything I said about being there for him, I didn't want to give him a reason to hurt me. I was going to do that anyway.

I just need to get as far away as possible.