Moonlight on Water

by hippiemama3

Broken by the loss of her brother, an assassin makes her way to Skyhold, intent on facing Judgment for her crimes. Against the backdrop of the Inquisition, Cullen unravels her carefully separated life, and she must pull the pieces together. All while he pulls her out of the shadows.

8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: Say the Words

Talise had never been a good patient. She was restless for the few days the healers ordered her to rest, picking up a book only to toss it to one side, grumpily turning down any food only to want it back minutes later, getting testy with Valissia and the healers as they checked on her wounds. The two days it took before Valissia declared that Talise could stop resting had tested their friendship, and both were short with each other.

As soon as she had been cleared by Valissia she had taken a long bath, ruthlessly scrubbed her hair clean; and dressed in clean clothes, headed for the Rookery. Talise passed the morning there, going over reports with Leiliana, and making plans; she had so easily merged her contacts with the Spymasters, and they worked so well together, Leiliana jokingly called her the Left Hand of the Left Hand. By the time they were done, a series of reports had been sent to Cullen and Josephine, and the rookery was nearly empty of both ravens and scouts. Both Talise and Leiliana were intent on finding out any scrap of information on Corypheus and his army, and they were both willing to stop at nothing to do so.

The rest of the day passed quickly for Talise. Her favorite poison was running low, and she mixed some of it, sitting in the apothecary shop as she worked. After her mission the previous days, her daggers had been well-used, and she cleaned them, taking them to Daghna to be thoroughly repaired and sharpened.

Now, she was standing in her room, looking at a small wooden box sitting on the vanity she shared with Valissia. The top was scattered with the trappings of two women, but also bottles of poison, herbs Valissia was studying, a few spells on scrolls, and several throwing knives. A small spot in the chaos had been cleared, and there sat the box. Along with a note, folded in half, her name written on the front, already she recognized his handwriting, it had come from Cullen.

Grinning despite herself, she opened the note first, leaning against the vanity as she read it, one ankle crossed over the other.

Talise,

You told me once about the flower garden your mother planted, and how it attracted butterflies. You smiled when you spoke of it, and these reminded me of your smile. Maybe someday you will have time to plant your own butterfly garden.

Cullen

With one hand, she reached for the box, her eyes re-reading Cullen's words, and without ever taking her sky touched gaze from the paper, she flipped the top of the box open. Only then did she dare peek at the contents of the box, a small sigh leaving her lush lips as she did. Inside of the box were packets of seeds, carefully labeled.

Still holding the letter in one hand, she picked up a packet in the other and stared intently at it. The conversation had been a short one, she had remarked on the flowers growing in the garden, and the memory of playing in her mother's flower garden. Each packet represented something more permanent, somewhere solid to live, as Talise and not as Ghost. Or maybe as both, she was both the woman who loved flowers and an assassin.

Laying the letter to one side, she picked up each packet, looking them over carefully. Most she recognized, and she closed her eyes as they started to brim with tears, remembering the times she played in the garden watching the butterflies. A smile curled the corner of her lips, and she brushed away her tears, tucking each packet of seeds back into the box with tender care.

A stack of stationary rested on one corner of the vanity, and she reached for several pages of it, a quill pen and a bottle of ink, setting out to craft a response. A few minutes later, she slipped into Cullen's office, laying an envelope with his name on it, written in a feminine swirl, as well as a freshly picked morning glory, on his desk. As stealthily as she came in, she walked back out, a faint shadow as she walked down ramparts.

With Christopher at his heels, Cullen walked into his office, agreeing on a few last details for a plan. Cullen's warm honey gaze saw the flower on his desk, and a small envelope beneath it. Casually he moved to pick it up, sighing as he caught just the barest whiff of water lily on the air, it almost seemed like Talise had been here to deliver her response himself.

"Since you're obviously not conducting Inquisition business, I'll just see myself out", the Herald grinned as Cullen held the flower in his hand, studying it intently, before slipping out a door. Putting the flower down carefully, he picked up the envelope, and tugged it open, breaking the gray wax seal, decorated with crossed daggers.

Cullen,

Thank you. I barely spoke of the garden, but you saw how much the memories meant to me. You keep doing that, noticing small things that I think are hidden away.

And yes, I will find somewhere to plant the flowers and make my own butterfly garden. Maybe you'll help me plant them.

Talise

The necklace is my favorite. Take good care of it.

"Necklace?" even as he spoke the words, he saw a glint of silver in the corner of the envelope, and with fingers that just barely shook, he tipped the envelope up. A silver chain slid from the envelope, decorated with a tiny pendant. Delicate silver wires were curled into the shape of butterfly wings; in the golden light that filtered through his windows, tiny gems sparkled blue and turquoise. The delicate pendant spun in the light as he stared at it, and he was nearly overcome by an urge to go find Talise, to hold her to him and promise her that he would plant flowers with her. Once this was over, if they survived, if this war ever ended, he would plant all the flowers she wanted.

Instead, he sat down at his chair, unbuckled his chest plate enough to slide his hand in, and dropped the necklace into a pocket on his shirt. It was too small for him to wear, and he was afraid of breaking the delicate chain, so instead he tucked it into a pocket on his muscled chest, a few inches away from his heart, before writing a note back.

Talise,

I will keep your necklace safe for as long as you want me to. Can I see you this evening? I have a meeting after dinner, but I've been promised it will be a short one.

Cullen

Dinner time found Talise in between Varric and Valissia, with Iron Bull and Dorian sitting across from her, and Sera slipping her notes from down the table.

"Talise…. Any plans for this evening?" Valissia grinned, unable to resist giving her best friend a good ribbing while they sat together at dinner.

"Plans?", Bull's good eye peered intently at Talise, his lips curving when he saw her blush and fidget in her chair, "I say she should strip naked, walk up to the ramparts and demand that Cullen f—"

"That is more than enough!" Talise protested, pressing her hands against her ears as everyone around her laughed, "He hates gossip you know."

"Then he needs to stop stealing kisses he thinks we don't see", Sera grinned, shoving a cookie in her mouth.

"So will you go up to his office, and just strip there then?" Varric looked up from the book he was writing in, his quill pausing, a wicked grin on his face.

"That desk looks sturdy enough." Iron Bull grinned at her over the top of his tankard, before draining it in one motion.

Talise choked on a mouthful of her dinner, unable to breathe for a second, and she glare at the Qunari, "Bull, stop it."

Iron Bull shrugs one massive shoulder in response, smiling at Talise's glare, "It's not like he doesn't want you. We all know he does."

"He has a point", Varric nods, "Cullen's infatuation is obvious for anyone with a pair of eyes and half a brain."

"Are we talking about Talise and Cullen?" Dorian smirks, sitting down next to Iron Bull, just slightly closer than he would have previously.

"Oh Maker. I wish you two would quit stalling", huffing in annoyance, Cassandra sits on the other side of Valissia.

"Ok, I'm done. I have somewhere to be", Talise jumps up from her seat, almost knocking it over in her embarrassment.

"Come on now little love", Varric grins at her, "Sit down and finish dinner. You go see him now and you'll faint before the good parts."

"Wouldn't that be romantic though, she just swoons into his arms?", Sera snorted with laughter at the idea.

Talise stopped to finish off the wine she had been drinking, ignoring her food, "I'll grab something to eat on my way to…. Do whatever it is I'm doing."

"You mean who." Bull looks from Dorian to Talise, smirking at her.

"I said nothing of the sort." Desperately trying to keep the blush from her cheeks, Talise turns, making her way towards the doors of the tavern.

"Didn't have to. Ben-Hassrath, remember?" As Bull calls out the words, he drops an arm over the back of Dorian's chair, in a move both casual and meaningful.

Talise fairly flees the inn, leaving the companions laughing, and Cassandra turned to Valissia, "I've been meaning to ask. Little love?"

"It's not exactly the nickname you would expect a fearsome assassin to have", Dorian adds, sipping at his drink. He did not move away from Bull, but did not lean into the warrior either, although he could not keep the smile from his face.

"It was what her father called her. She came early, and she was this tiny thing with dark hair that screamed all the time. Or so Jordan always said," Valissia smiled at the memories of her friends, "When her father died, Jordan started calling her that. I picked it up from there."

Cassandra nodded, taking a tankard from a passing barmaid with a murmur of thanks, "So it's a family thing then?"

"It's odd she lets people here call her that." Dorian, still half-ignoring Iron Bull, half-leaning into him, spoke from his side of the table.

"No. It's not." Valissia pauses for a moment, long fingers toying with her mug of ale, "She has not been Talise much. She's been the Ghost of Ferelden more. But here, she gets to be who she really is."

"So we can all call her little love then?" Iron Bull smirked, knowing full well what the answer would be. Cullen had been protective of Talise since the moment she had stepped into Skyhold, and that protectiveness grew with each day. Now it was obvious to more than just a well-trained Qunari spy.

"I would take that up with Commander Rutherford if I were you", with a smirk on his face, Christopher dropped into the chair beside Valissia, lifting a hand to brush a kiss against her fingers, "And I have the feeling he will say no. Meeting is over, which is why I suppose I don't see Talise."

"So, is she going to see him or what?" Sera breaks the quiet moment, earning her a grin from Varric.

Valissia nods, lifting her gaze from the Herald's, "I'm certain of it."

"This isn't just a thing, for her, is it?" Cassandra frowned suddenly, concern darkening her features.

"I don't think so." Valissia shakes her head no in response, auburn hair gleaming in the firelight, "Cullen… I don't know how to explain it, but he sees her. I think he's the first one to see her, and not just a spy skulking around in corners."

"Hawke did once. I remember he questioned Jordan about Talise repeatedly, until finally Jordan threatened to beat him to a pulp." Varric spoke off-handedly, his quill moving across the paper as he wrote, not lifting his eyes from his work.

"Really?", Valissia blinks a few times, "I had no idea."

"Do you remember when the three of you came to Kirkwall, you were headed to see Amelia?", Varric looked over at Valissia, continuing when she nodded, "Hawke was interested in her then."

"Well, she's a lost cause for sure." Dorian speaks, "If she goes up there to Cullen, things will change between them. And no one will have a shot with her."

"No one has had a shot with her since she walked in through the gates. He's all she's looked at", Iron Bull speaks then, draining his mug.

"The shadow looks for the light. The light waits for the shadow. They will meet where shadow and light touch." Cole speaks, appearing out of thin air, causing several of the companions to jump.

"Andraste's bouncing tits Kid! Don't just sneak up like that!" Varric recovered first, glaring at the blonde-haired, half-spirit. Despite their fears, Cole was well-meaning, but his habit of just appearing was disconcerting.

It was a relatively short meeting, but Cullen had been impatient from the start, gloved hands tapping on the war table anytime a discussion drug on for long. Talise's team of contacts and spies had been added to the Inquisition's, and there was a fresh stack of reports. He was grateful for the additional information, but also impatient to get done with the meeting. Gloved fingers drummed on the table anytime anyone spoke for over long, and he was more distracted than usual, agreeing to several plans only to change his mind and argue for a more militaristic approach.

As soon as Christopher departed for the Herald's Rest, Josephine for her office and Leiliana for the rookery, Cullen headed back to his quarters. Once inside he surveyed the room, muttering a prayer of gratitude that it was neat and tidy. The envelope that contained Talise's necklace and her flower had been moved to a shelf on the bookcase, he stared at the flower as he started to pace the length of his office, questioning whether he was pushing things too far and too soon. Talise was still grieving for her brother, the war was still waging, he had no idea what the morning would bring them. Was now the time to start something like this with her? And if not now, when?

With every step across the keep, up to the ramparts, Talise's heart rocketed in speed, until she could feel it throbbing in the hollow of her throat. Her knees wobbled on the steps, and she had to lean over the top of the rampart when she got to the top, heaving deep breaths into her lungs. Everything would change, one way or the other, when she walked into Cullen's office. Her heart, something she had kept hidden away all her life, would be out in the open, leaving her more vulnerable than if she was standing in a room full of guards in the middle of the day, holding the Ferelden royal jewels.

Her sure steps faltered again, and she came to a stop, staring at the door to Cullen's office, her feet suddenly locked in place. It took several breaths for her hands to stop shaking, and she stood there for several minutes more, her swirling cerulean gaze wide in the moonlight, the fluttering heartbeat visible in her throat, betraying her nerves, even as she stood completely still.

Two choices lay before her, to retreat into the shadows, to end this… flirtation before it really got started, and bury the memory of stolen kisses in the back of her mind. Focus on the war, on defeating a monster of nightmares made real, and saving her world. Or… walk past all the complications, all the complexities of life that faced her, past the pain of her losing her family, walk out of the shadows, and straight into Cullen's arms.

Weeks' worth of memories come to her; that first awful night, when he had stayed with her, praying the words she could not say, keeping one hand curled around hers and an arm wrapped around her shoulder until her tears faded. His hand curled around her arm when she faced the Herald's judgment, intent on protecting her, seeing the good in her, even as he missed the good in himself. His letters, gradually warming up to her, until he confessed he saw her eyes in the morning glories in the garden, playing chess, that flower he picked for her, the one she had the mages carefully preserve and protect in a glass box, the way he looked at her, every time he saw her. Waiting for her one evening as she taught the scouts, bringing her chocolate, and the kisses on the ramparts afterwards.

"If I die tomorrow, I will not waste tonight" whispering the words, she took one step, then another, her easy saunter returning to her, and she stepped up to his door, raised a hand to knock softly, only to see that the heavy door is just barely open. Pushing it open, she peered inside, sighing as she saw him.

Cullen stood before a darkened window, his back to the office, one hand braced on the stone windowsill, his blonde head bowed in thought. From her spot in the doorway, she could see him frowning, and her fingers curl against her palms, as the sudden urge to run her fingers across the worry lines catches her.

"Cullen?" she spoke his name softly, almost whispering it, almost hesitant to walk into his office, even as her heart demanded she do just that.

"Maker's breath…" she is standing in a puddle of moonlight, her hair nearly black in the darkness, the shining mass lifted up in some way that makes him want to run his fingers through her hair, tugging it free. Against her porcelain skin, her eyes appeared brighter, shining in shifting shades of blue as she looked up at him, meeting his gaze directly instead of peeking out from underneath him from her lashes. A silken shirt was tied around her neck, baring smooth shoulders to him, and his amber gaze lingered on the curves of her breasts, staying there for a beat too second, before sliding down her body. It was her leggings that nearly snapped his control, the ties on the hips were not laced all the way up, instead bits of tender skin was bare to his honey warm gaze, "You are beautiful."

He his compliment was rewarded with a blush that darkened the tops of her cheeks, and even the curves of her ears as she stepped into the office, "Thank you. I feel more nervous than beautiful."

"You? Nervous?" He walked to her, leaning past her to shut the heavy doors, his hands staying on the heavy wood, braced on either side of her head.

He was so close, she took a deep breath, oak moss and elderflower filling her head, making it swim slightly, "HmmMmm. Very nervous."

"I make you nervous then?" He leaned toward her, close enough to catch a whiff of her water lily scented hair, just the smell of her had his pulse racing, bringing out a side of him he thought carefully hidden away.

He was more aggressive, somehow, leaning closer to her as she leaned against the door, and Talise stifled a whimper, sinking her teeth into her lower lip and biting the curve hard, "I can't hide. I mean, I can, but you seem to be able to find me anytime I hide."

"I'm trained for it… and besides", with a gentle, commanding dominance, he leaned in, almost kissing her, "You smell like flowers. I just follow your perfume."

"Maybe… I will… stop… wearing it" even to her ears her words are breathy.

Slowly, infinitely slowly, but not faltering, he slide one hand around her back, drawing her away from the door, and pulling her to him, "Hmmmm.. So I will have to chase you then? Is that what you want?"

Talise shook her head no at his words, past the point of any interest in the chase, or in being chased.

"Tell me what you want." Still moving slowly, but with quiet dominance, he leaned down to whisper in ear, cupping her head with his free hand.

"I want…" her teeth dug into her lip again, and he leaned forward to stop her, pressing a feathery soft kiss against her bruised lower lip. Talise remembered her words to Valissia that morning in the garden, speaking of her deepest desire, and her cheeks flushed again.

Whispered words were pressed into her cheek with small kisses, the hand that cupped her head releasing it to stroke through her dark tresses, tugging free tiny hair pins as he found them, "I can't give you what you want if you don't tell me."

A blush covered every visible inch of silky smooth, pale skin, as she spoke, "To…. To be engulfed. Overwhelmed. To forget my own name, the world. To see nothing… but you."

Cullen's gaze widened for the briefest moment, of all the things he thought Talise would want, would ask for, she had shocked him. He leaned his forehead against hers, his hands curling into fists on the door as he fought desperately for some small thread of control. The battle was lost when Talise leaned up, flicking her tongue against his lower lip, and then sucking it past her lips, nipping at it with her teeth.

In one move he picked her up, pinning her to his body, and turned, taking the few steps to his desk. He would never make it to the ladder to his bed, and with one arm he shoved the reports, the papers, the books, off his desk, sending everything falling to the floor in a crash. Once his table was cleared off, he set Talise on the edge of it, leaning into her and capturing her lips in a kiss.

Her nimble fingers were working on the clasps of his chest piece as he shrugged out of his surcoat, letting it fall to the ground in a heap of fur and red cloth. He had one glove between his teeth, pulling it off his hand when he felt the tremor go through her body, "Talise… have you done this before?"

"Have I ever stripped a man out of his armor while sitting on his desk?" she grinned up at him, her cheeks flushed with arousal.

His calloused fingers trailed over the lush curve of her lower lip, rubbing it back and forth, "I'm not joking Talise. I want this, badly. But I don't want to hurt you."

"To answer your question, yes I have", she stammered a bit, her usually nimble fingers fumbling with the clasps on his armor, "If you must know, it wasn't good. I didn't… he was timid, unsure of himself. Every time."

"Just one man then?" He tugged his other glove free as he spoke, dropping them both to the floor.

She nodded, leaning her burning forehead against his chest, "Yes, just the one man. Being a world-famous assassin doesn't really give you much time for sex."

His blood roared at her words, and he clenched his fingers around hers' for a moment, heaving a deep breath into his lungs, letting go of her fingers and tilting her chin up with one hand, "This won't be just once. I will give you time to walk out, if you want. But if you stay here, you're mine Talise. Mine."

She froze, looking up at him with sky touched eyes, meeting his arousal darkened gaze while her cheeks heated in a blush. Her fingers traced the templar sword engraved on his greaves, and finally she looked down, she would be puddled on his desk if she looked into his amber gaze any longer.

Calloused fingers slid into the shining lengths of her dark hair, tugging her head back when she would look away, "Oh no. You said you wanted to be overwhelmed. To lose yourself. You can't close your eyes, and you can't look away."

She nodded, wincing slightly when the movement pulled on her hair, lost his golden gaze. A sigh escaped her when his fingers trailed over her bared shoulders, "You're warm."

Calloused fingers slid over her shoulders, toying with the silken ends tied in a bow behind her neck, "Maker's breath… how is your skin this soft?"

"You don't see the bottles of lotion in my room", she grinned at his words, but lifts her hands in helplessness, "I give up. There is no way to get you out of your armor. You must sleep in it."

He laughed then, her frustration with his armor giving him something to focus on other than the tender skin at the back of neck, skin he wanted to sink his teeth into, "Here, let me show you."

For a few minutes, he held his fingers with his, running them over the clasps and buckles in his armor, slowly taking his piece off, and letting them drop to the floor. When the last piece dropped to the floor with a clang, her arms curled around his neck, tugging him to her, and he followed, tugging off the arming vest he wears beneath it as he leaned into her.

Her lips grazed his neck, and one of his hands curled into her hair, gripping it tight enough to bring her head up, his other hand reached for the ties on her hip, tugging at them, "Is there a reason why you didn't tie them all the way?"

"All the better to seduce you"

"You didn't need the leggings." He whispered the words in his ear, tugging on the suede ties, groaning as they came undone easily in his hands. The supple material was molded to her legs, and so snug, that the gap in her leggings widened, revealing more of her thigh, "Don't move."

She nodded as he let go of her hair, her bright gaze watching his fingers as he reached for the ties on her other leg, tugging them hard enough to jerk the loose bow she looped into the tie open. Her leggings pooled around her hips, if she was standing they would be sliding down her legs. One large hand skimmed down her leg, trailing over the bared skin, grabbing the top of her boot and pulling it off, before Cullen tugged her other boot off.

The cool air raised goosebumps on her pale skin, and Talise shivered, the only movement she made as Cullen pulled her boots from her, her gaze dark with desire. He felt the shiver, and slowly he slid his hands up her legs, gripping her leggings and tugging them down her legs in one smooth motion, the laces running up her thighs pulling free further.

"Cullen…"

"Hush." He paused in his perusal of her body, running just the tips of his fingers over her thighs, gratified to see her squeeze them together in response, "Don't move."

"I haven't." She gritted the words out, her entire body throbbing as his fingers slid over her thighs.

"I know. Good girl", his fingers slowly skimmed up her arms, toying with the ties on her shirt behind her neck, "And did you wear this shirt to seduce me too?"

She nodded at his words, unable to hide the shiver that coasted down her spine, his tone was rougher, deeper, and she was responding to it, "Yes."

"You didn't have to." He leaned in to brush a kiss across her lips, before pulling back, "I've wanted you every time I saw you. Sitting in the war room, reading your reports, I wanted you. Playing chess in the garden, I wanted you. I was hard for days after you brought me up here to eat chocolate."

With each word, he tugged a little harder on the ties of her shirt, slowly loosening them, pulling with sure, determined ease. When the bow loosened fully, and the ties fell apart, Talise's hands rose to catch them automatically. Cullen grinned them, a smirk curling the corner of his mouth, "No no. You weren't supposed to move."

He caught both of her hands in his at the same time he leaned into her, pressing her backwards onto the desk, until she was stretched out on the desk underneath him. The top of her shirt was loosened enough that the curves of her breasts were bared as she stretched out beneath him, one bare foot coming up to rest on the edge of his desk, and tugged at the material, hard enough that the stitches gave with a popping noise, "Tell me something… how much do you like this shirt?"

Talise panted for breath, her chest rising and heaving, beneath the shirt she was bare, and her nipples hurt as they hardened into points, just barely hidden from view by her shirt, "I… can…"

"You can?" He prompted when she paused, his lips pressed between her breasts, dropping warm kisses up the inner curves, where her skin was as soft as down.

"Get a new one" she gasped the words out, her fingers rising from where he had placed them on his desk, digging into his shoulders.

"Talise… You were supposed to hold still", smirking at her, he lifted her hands back into place, pinning them with one hand. One swift, hard pull and the shirt she wore disintegrated, seams popping and panels of watered silk falling apart. Cullen looked down at her and groaned, she was perfect; pert breasts, not quite enough to fill his hands were topped with rose pink nipples, nipples that were hard already, begging for his mouth.

Her teeth dug into her lower lip until it hurt as his mouth closed over her breast, and Talise tried in vain to keep the moan from escaping her. Muscles bunched as she arched from the desk, offering herself further to Cullen, who answered with a muffled groan. His lips still sucking on her nipple, tongue lashing it, one hand slid up the inside of her thigh, until he felt smooth silk and lace. For a moment he paused, torn between letting go and looking down to see what she was wearing, or just pulling off. At her whimper, he lifted his head, seeing her swollen lower lip being battered between her teeth, and he lifted his head, "I was going to go slow. I wanted to go slow. Maker's breath, I want to go slow."

The silk in his hands came apart with a tug, and he groaned again, looking down to see her swollen and wet already, dark hair carefully trimmed, "Talise… I can't stop."

She ignored his command to stay still, and shifted, wrapped her legs around his waist, her fingers curling into his wrist as he held her hands to the desk, "Please Cullen… please…"

"You don't know what you're asking for."

"Cullen…" she pants his name, her legs tightening around his waist, trying in vain to pull her to him, "I told you what I wanted. You said you would give it to me if I told you."

"Maker's breath…" His free hand slid down her stomach, feeling the muscles bunch and jump as she squirmed, and he gritted his teeth, remembering his training to keep from losing every ounce of control he had, "I did say that… didn't I?"

She nodded, shifting and writhing beneath him, he was so close to touching her, his fingers skimming over her skin, rubbing her swollen clit gently. The moan that escaped her echoed in his office, and her hips lifted eagerly from the wooden desk, following his movements, "Please…"

"Please what Talise?"

"Please… don't…" she meant to say stop, meant to beg him for more, but his fingers left her clit, and she whined, the sound rising into a squeal as he slid one finger into her, with agonizing slowness.

"Don't? You don't want me then?" Cullen winced as she squeezed his finger, adding another, ignoring the throb of his cock, which was pressing insistently against his pants.

"I didn't say that.." Talise panted, her hands struggling against his as she squirmed, her nails digging into his palm and the back of his hand. She was so slick, and growing wetter by the second, her thighs growing damp with it, as she pressed her hips against his hand. White sparks grew in vision, and she moaned, arching up against Cullen's frame, "Fuck… Cullen.. please.."

"Give it to me sweetheart. Let me feel you" he murmured the words in her ear, nipping at the soft flesh beneath it, intent on feeling her orgasm around his fingers. He had been shocked when she had admitted to never climaxed with a man, and he was now driven by some instinct to be the first one it happened with.

As his fingers slid in and out of her with pleasurable movements, Talise shuddered, her legs shifting restlessly around his waist. Electricity sparked down her spine, and she arched, a moan rising in her throat, only to turn into a scream when Cullen brushed his calloused thumb against his aching clit.

She was screaming, the sound morphing into his name, and Cullen groaned, reaching for the ties on his breeches, and tugging them open. As soon as his cock slid out, he ran a hand down his swollen length, once, twice, moaning as pleasure arced through him. His muscles jumped as he leaned down, brushing against her, drawing her orgasm out, and before she relaxed beneath him, he pushed into her body, cursing as she tightened around him. With one long thrust he slid into her body, until his hips were pressed against hers, and her legs curled around his waist.

His hand, smarting where her nails had dug into it, released her hands, and he grabbed her waist with both hands, pulling her down the desk until she was fully embedded on his length, and he was stretched out over her, panting as he thrust into her slowly, grinding against her, "Is this what you wanted?"

Just as she could start to breathe again, he had slid into her, and she had, despite his earlier words, closed her eyes as her climax burned hotter, drawing out further, burying her head in his shoulder. At his words she opened her eyes, and saw nothing but his skin, the curve of his shoulder, the line of his neck; her body responded by clenching around his, "Yes Cullen. Yes."

She was too wet, too hot, too tight, squeezing around him, and he groaned, cursing as he held still, his fingers squeezing around her waist. He was spiraling out of control, he wanted nothing more than to bury himself in her repeatedly, as hard as he could, until she was screaming his name again. The urge to fuck her, over and over, until she was undeniably his, snapped his control repeatedly.

With each thrust she slid up the table, and he brought her back to him, pulling on her hips, feeling her heat envelope him and squeeze him tightly, until he could not even breathe. Every inch of her pale skin, normally so cool to the touch, was warm, turning pink, a blush that spread down her cheeks, he shoulders, over the curves of her breasts and down the flat planes of her stomach. His warm gaze followed the flush of color, and he let go of her hips to follows the blush with his hands, and then his lips, sucking one tautened nipple into his mouth and nipping at it with her teeth.

Talise shrieked then, her skin almost too sensitive to touch, and she curled her fingers into his hair, holding him to her tightly, her hips lifting from the desk to meet each hard, demanding thrust. Her legs tightened around his waist, and she slid one hand down the back of his head and over his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin.

The flash of pain as she raked her nails brought his head up, desire burning hot in his gaze, "I'm fairly certain… I told you.. to leave your hands on the desk."

"I didn't listen." She smirked up at him, shifting her legs and lifting her hips higher off the desk

Cullen stopped, almost pulling from her body, groaning with the effort, and leaned back, sliding her down the desk until her ass was nearly hanging off it, pushing her smooth thighs further apart with his hands, "So you're not my good girl."

Good girl. Every time he said it, whispered those words in his rough voice, chills skated down her spine, and Talise could not stop the whimper as he slid her down the desk, her fingers scratching the surface as she searched for a place to hold on to.

"Don't. I've got you." Teasingly he rocked just barely in and out of her as he held onto her hips, smirking down at her, "Look at you… spread out on my desk for me. Wet and pink and begging for me."

Her blue gaze nearly rolled back in her head, with each teasing thrust he got deeper, almost brushing that spot inside of her that sent fire roaring through her. She couldn't catch her breath, couldn't feel her toes, couldn't feel anything but him, sliding in and out of her body with wicked sureness, "Please… please… please…"

"There she is. There's my good girl", he watched her eyes dilate when he called her that, watched her pulse thrum in the hollow of her throat, felt her squeeze tighter around him and he cursed, losing himself and slamming into her, his hips grinding against hers.

"Cullen…" she whimpered the words, one hand sliding down her body, nimble fingers reaching for her swollen clit as he thrust into her.

"Fuck Talise… I can't watch you.." his eyes squeezed shut, his hands trembling on her thighs as he held her legs open wider, giving him more room to surge into her body in harder thrusts.

She paused, her fingers just inches from her aching clit, her teeth digging into her lip as she whimpered. Much as she wanted to, she couldn't, when his eyes closed she worried she had pushed things too far, and suddenly she wanted to bury her face in his neck.

As in tune with her as he was, Cullen felt her fingers still, felt her body shift, and he blinked, slowing his thrusts and looking down at her. His heart squeezed hard when he saw the uncertainty in her cerulean gaze, and he reached for her, rubbing his thumb over her bruised lower lip, "You'll make me cum Talise. I can't watch you and not lose myself in you."

"I won't then."

"Maker's breath.. don't you fucking dare", he groaned, his fingers reaching for her dark hair and curling into it, holding on tightly, "I want you to. I need you to."

Slowly, her fingers inched down, trailing over her clit in the barest touch, even her light touch enough to set her off, and she squealed, her hips rising from the desk, her depths squeezing him harder as she rubbed again, moving in tiny circles.

He knew what she wanted, and knew what she needed, when she had asked for it, and he leaned down, enough to whisper to her in a rough command, "Be my good girl. Do what I told you."

Talise's eyes squeezed shut at his words, she was right there, hovering on the edge, when he thrust into her welcoming body harder, pulling her hips to his with his hands, and his words pushed her over. Her breath caught as her vision turned white, and when she sucked in a breath, she was screaming his name, uncaring of anyone that would hear her. Cullen slipped a hand over her mouth, still coherent enough to muffle her scream.

But it was his name. His name she had screamed as she came, tightening around him until it was painful, until could do nothing but thrust helplessly into her, swelling as he got closer to the edge, feeling her grow slicker and wetter and even hotter than she had been before. With a shout he came, his hips pressed so tightly against hers they almost ached, his knees wobbling, and he fell against the desk, propping himself up with one hand.

Talise was not sure how long they floated, rocking against each other, drawing the pleasure out as far as they could, her legs wrapping tightly around his hips, her arms cradling his head to her breasts. He moved justly barely, surging into her slowly, and finally he slid out of her body with a moan, too sensitive to stay within her folds, as much as he wanted to. His amber eyes darkened as he looked down at her, the flush starting to fade from her skin, her eyes half-closed, a flash of blue from under coal dark lashes. His seed leaked from her, smearing her thighs, glistening over her folds, and he groaned, feeling his cock twitch with interest as he leaned back.

"Are you alright?"

In an instant, the dominating man was gone, and Talise felt something soft and warm curl around her heart, more than it had been there before. She nodded weakly, her feet sliding off the edge of the desk, and he caught her legs in his hands, keeping her thighs from slamming onto the edge of the table. Once her feet were safely on the ground, he reached for her, lifting her from the table and into his arms, sighing as she tucked her head underneath his chin, "Are you sure you're alright. You're so tiny… and tight. Maker's breath, you have no right to feel that good."

She felt the shudder pass through his frame as his words, and she giggled, clamping a hand to her mouth to try and stifle her laughter as she leaned into him, "I didn't think that was a bad thing."

He grinned as she laughed, enjoying the sound of her laughter, "It is. Tomorrow, when I'm standing at my desk, giving orders, I'll think about this. And how incredibly tight you are."

"That's a bad thing?" Slowly she stretched her legs, reaching for the floor with her toes.

"If I drag you in here and strip you naked in the middle of the day it is." As he spoke he reached for the shirt he wore beneath his armor, the fabric wrinkled from laying on the floor, and tugged it over her head, "And I owe you a shirt."

"I'll just take one of yours in payment." An impish grin lifts her mouth as she lifts her now tangled hand from under the collar of his shirt, tugging the last remaining pins out of the dark tresses.

He smiled at her, the scar that cut down to his lips moving as he did, "You could make 4 of those flimsy things you wore out of one of my shirts, how is that fair?"

"Never claimed to be fair Cullen." She grinned, pulling away from him and flipping her hair over her head, sauntering towards the ladder that led to the balcony where his bed was.

A shriek filled the air as Cullen snatched her, turning her to face him, and then lifted her over one shoulder, walking towards the ladder as he did, "I agree, you've never played fair."

"Cullen!" She squirmed half-heartedly, before giving up and hanging over his shoulder as he climbed the ladder, her eyes widening as they got further off the ground, "You know, I'm perfectly capable of climbing the ladder by myself."

"I've got you. I won't let you fall" He grinned as he felt her stiffen, clamping a hand around her waist and pinning her to him as he climbed the ladder, not pausing until they stood on the balcony and he could set her gently on her feet, holding onto her elbows to steady her.

As soon as Talise was on her feet, she looked up, through the hole in the ceiling, not saying anything as she searched the sky. The neckline of his shirt, untied, fell over her shoulder as she stood there, and she tugged at it, her throat bared to him as she tilted her head back, the movement sending her hair waterfalling over her back in a chocolate colored, silken spill.

"What are you looking for?" He watched her, coming to stand behind her, and slid his arms around her waist, leaning his face on her small shoulder.

She leaned her frame against him, her knees wobbling slightly still, "The stars. You wrote to me of watching the stars when you couldn't sleep, and I wanted to see them."

"Oh. Not from there." Gently he guided her with warm, strong hands to his bed, and he climbed onto it, sitting on his knees in the middle of the bed, and then tugging on her hand. She went willingly, crawling towards him until he held her in front of him, pulling her body to his until they were pressed together, tilting her chin up when his calloused fingers slid beneath it, "Here. I saw them from here."

Twinkling stars studded the blue velvet expanse of the night as she looked upwards, her eyes reflecting the light in a swirl of blue as she looked at him, "So when you couldn't sleep you watched the stars and wrote me letters?"

"And did… other things." Despite their earlier coupling on the desk, the evidence of which was scattered across his office floor, he blushed pink, the tops of his cheeks warming under her gaze.

"Someday… I'm going to want to watch that." A brow lifted at his confession, and she grinned impishly up at him.

"Really?" Cullen's blush deepened, although he had to admit he was intrigued by the idea, and his eyes sparkled with interest.

"Yes. Really."

"I want to watch you then."

"You just did. You owe me one." A hot blush darkened her cheeks as she looked up at him, her fingers toying with the ties on the shirt she wore.

"Touché. I owe you a show then." He grinned at her, through his blush, before looking upwards at the stars again, "Mostly I sat up here and thought about you. Worried about you."

Her smirk faded as she looked at him, face turned up to watch the stars in the sky, a lump forming in her throat as her heart beat against her ribs so hard it ached. Or maybe it was just her want of him that made her heart ache, "I thought of you every time I watched the sunrise. Which was often, I always asked for the last watch."

"You did?" He barely breathed the words out, unable to believe that she was here, in his bed, confessing what felt like something deeper to him. He barely dared to hold on to hope, but he couldn't help himself, his heart thrummed in his chest suddenly.

"Just so I could watch the sunrise. You promised me that dawn would come, that first night. So I started watching for it." She nodded, looking down from the sky to his gaze once more, hers bright with an emotion, sparkling with it.

"Talise I…"

"Cullen…"

The spoke at the same time, and both blushed, Talise turning a dark pink as she fidgeted with the hem of his shirt where it hung over her thighs.

"What is it Talise?" One calloused hand reached for hers, curling around her fingers and holding onto her hand.

"I… I…" her teeth sunk into her lip, and she paused, standing on the precipice between confessing everything, and holding back, "Can't say the words again."

Even as his heart clenched a little as she backed down, he could see the answer shining in her eyes, and he reached for her, curling his arms around her, "I won't make you say them. If you don't feel like…"

"No. No Cullen, that's not what I meant. And this wasn't a one time thing for me, and I have no idea what I'm doing, if you can't tell." she babbled, wincing as the words came out in a rush.

"Shhh.." he leaned forward, capturing her lips with her in a tender kiss, "Do you want to know something? That first night, when I watched Varric take you to your room, after you had cried in the chapel, I wanted to make you leave. I wanted to take you and hide you somewhere safe, until all this is over."

She said nothing, her breath caught in her throat, her sky touched gaze wide and too large for her face as she stared at him.

"There isn't anywhere safe, until this war is over. But I wanted to, so badly." He paused, taking a deep breath, "All I've done and all I've seen, and I never wanted to protect someone as badly as I want to protect you. It's been years since I even thought about someone in my life."

A burn of tears clogs her throat, and her eyes gleam with them, spilling out onto her smooth cheeks when she blinks, sliding down her skin, "Cullen…"

"The way you say my name. It makes my heart ache." He smiles at her, tugging her to him, until she is tucked beneath his chin once more, slowly he eased back onto the pillows, taking her with him until she was curled tightly against his chest, the fingers of his free hand curling around hers.

"I love you" the whispered words hung in the air, and she holds her breath, waiting to hear them back.

"Maker's breath.. I never thought I'd hear you say them."

"I love you", she grew bolder then, lifting her head from his chest and pressing a kiss to the scar that ran down to his lips, "I love you Cullen. I think I have since I saw you that first night."

"The moment you came out of the shadows, you had my heart. You will always have it." His calloused hands trembled slightly as he cupped her face in them, "I love you."

Sometime in the morning, just as the dark sky started the inevitable fade to sunrise, Talise's eyes popped open, alert as Cullen jerked beside her. He twitched again in his sleep, murmuring words as she sat up, shoving her dark hair back away from her face. She was exhausted, they had slept little; reaching for each other over and over, she had woken up to his hands cupped around her breasts, his lips at her ears, later she had slid her fingers down his taut stomach and toyed with his cock until he woke up aching and had reached for her with a hungry gleam in his eyes. Sleep fled her quickly as she realized Cullen was dreaming, and just as her fingers reached for him, sliding over his stubbled jaw, he jerked himself away, his golden eyes flying open as he half sat up.

"Bad dream?"

Cullen nodded, panting slightly and laying back down, covering his eyes with one muscled forearm, "I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's fine. I'd rather be woken up than you suffer with a bad dream", she leaned up enough to press a kiss to his jaw, feeling his muscles tremble as she did, "What do you need?"

"You. Just you." In one movement he rolled to his side and pulled him to her, rearranging her arms and legs until one leg hung over his hip, and her arms were wrapped around his neck, his head tucked into her shoulder.

Slowly she drew circles on his shoulders and back, feeling the knots of tension in his muscles there, and she leaned back enough to brush a kiss on his forehead, "You know what you need?"

"I just told you."

"No. You need a back rub. A good one." Gently she disentangled herself from him, making her way down the ladder and rummaging around in the bag Valissia had sent up. She grinned as she peeked inside of it, seeing all the mage had packed for her, fresh underthings, the lacy ones Talise favored, a clean pair of leggings, a shirt, a comb and brush, a couple vials of her favorite bath oils, soap, and gleaming in a bottle was a bottle of oil, unscented. Talise mixed a few drops of the elder flower and oakmoss oils into it, knowing they would help ease his tired muscles, and climbed the ladder back up.

Cullen had rolled onto his stomach as soon as Talise had left, listening to her rummage around in her bag, and he sleepily grinned at her as she slid back into bed, "Remind me to thank Valissia for her foresight when I see her next."

"I think not having a grouchy roommate will be thanks enough."

"Have you been fighting with Valissia?"

"No. I've just been…. More temperamental than usual." She poured some of the oil into her palms, and rubbed her hands together, warming the oil before she touched him.

"Why?" As he asked the question, Talise slid her hands over his shoulders and down his back, digging into the tired muscles there, and he let out of a groan, burying his golden head into a pillow, "Maker…"

"Why what?" She smirked at his words, her nimble fingers finding each sore muscle and digging into them, her fingers sliding over his skin.

"I have forgotten what I asked about" his cheeks flushed with embarrassment as he looked over his shoulder at her.

"I'm so good at this you've forgotten your questioning?" she laughs, working her way down his back, pressing into the sore muscles and rubbing gently.

He groans again, burying his face in the pillow. When she leaned into him, reaching back up towards his shoulders, her felt her stomach, felt her breasts graze his back, and in seconds he was hard again, throbbing against the mattress. But what she was doing with her hands, working out the sore muscles knotted by stress and tension, felt wonderful, and he was content to lay in the bed, "You're my weakness, I can't pretend that you're not anymore."

At his words, she paused, her fingers stopping their pleasurable work. A smile curved her lips, and she leaned forward, brushing her lips gently against his ear, "You're mine. I watch you at meetings and my knees get weak."

Cullen smiled at his words, his warm honey eyes closing as her fingers picked up their pleasurable work. She stayed where she was, perched on his back, her legs folded on each side of his hips, rubbing his muscles until the oil was rubbed into his skin. The bed shifted as she moved, reached for the bottle and she poured more oil into her palm, setting the bottle down and then starting to work on one of his arms. His lashes flickered as he looked up at her, and then his gaze followed her hands, watching her fingers as she dug into the muscles of his upper arm, and then his forearm. When her slick fingers started rubbing circles on his palm, and then rubbing each individual finger, until his hand was relaxed on the bed, he groaned, letting his head drop onto the bed once more.

By the time she finished his other arm and hand, his skin was tingling. He was relaxed, laying stretched out on his bed, as much as he was aroused, and he raised one hand to catch one of hers, pressing a kiss to the center of her palm, "You have extremely talented hands."

"Part of the job. Pick locks, pick pockets, rifle through people's secrets, give good back rubs" she smirked as she stretched out on her side against him, one hand lazily trailing up and down his back.

He laughed, rolling to his side to face her, and then leaning over her, capturing her fingers in his, bringing them to his lips. Tender kisses were pressed into her palm, and he nipped at her finger tips, watching as chills broke out across her skin, "Are you always so sensitive?"

It took her a moment to respond, her eyes growing hazy with arousal as he kissed and nipped and bit his way across her hand and up the inside of her arm, "I don't know. This doesn't generally happen."

"I see…" he lips trailed over her shoulder, and then up to her ear, where his teeth sunk in with more force than he had nipped at her fingers. She gasped and arched, her body rubbing against his, "You smell like me."

"It's from the oil."

"Hmmm.. and from sleeping in my bed."

"That too. I'm going to have to take a bath later on."

"No", his lips skimmed over one breast, nuzzling into the soft curves, his tongue licking a hot trail over her nipple, making her gasp, "Stay like this."

"People will talk."

"You've been up here since last night, if they're going to talk, let them talk about something worthwhile", he groaned as his fingers coasted over the folds between her legs. She was swollen, tender from the previous time, but she was already slick with want, coating his fingers as they ghosted over her skin, "How is it that I want you again already?"

"I give good back rubs." Her hips arched into his hand, pressing herself harder against him, her feet sliding across his bed.

"You do. And you whimper my name, and you wrap yourself around me, and you're so incredibly wet. And tight" he cursed, his eyebrows coming together as he slid two fingers into her depths, his thumb rubbing over her clit.

"Cullen…"

"That, right there. That's what I like to hear" he grinned wickedly, leaving her breasts and trailing his tongue over her ribs, down her stomach, his shoulders spreading her thighs apart.

"Cullen" his name was almost a whine as he slid down her body, her back arching from the bed and towards his mouth.

"Next time you say my name", with one hand he spread her legs further, leaning in to drag his tongue over her, flicking it against her clit, "… Scream it."

Talise had both hands pressed to her mouth, trying to keep her moans and whimpers contained as he continued to lick her folds, his fingers sliding in and out of her body. One of his large hands slid down her leg, lifting it over his shoulder, lifting her hips up from the bed and towards his mouth. It was just a few licks, just a few passes of his tongue over her clit, and she was screaming, her back arching from the bed as her vision went white. Spasming around his fingers, her hands fell from her mouth and she screamed his name, her fingers digging into the sheet and anchoring her to the bed.

He was drunk on her, Cullen was sure. The taste and feel of her had gone to his head. He groaned as she screamed, uncaring that anyone awake in the keep, and close to his quarters, could hear her. Once she relaxed on the bed, her thigh falling from his shoulder, he held it in place with his hand, continuing his pleasurable work. Talise moaned above him, her hands sliding down to his head, her fingers curling around the hand that held her thigh in place, the other fingers sliding into his hair. At the same time he sucked her on her clit, his amber gaze drifted up her body, her head was thrown back, hair in wild disarray across the bed, and her eyes were shut. She whimpered, her hips pressing against his mouth and fingers, and he groaned in response, pressing his hips into the mattress beneath them, rubbing his swollen length against the bed, desperate for any relief, at the same time he brought her to another peak.

Her throat was hoarse when she cried out this time, and broke. Small toes slid against the sheets as writhed on the bed, squirming underneath his hands, her hips pushing against his while she squeezed his fingers so hard he could not move them within her. When she relaxed on the bed, panting, he was sitting on his knees between her splayed thighs, one hand on his swollen cock, stroking it in sure, but slow movements, his eyes hungry as they watched her.

For a moment she merely watched, his calloused hand sliding up and down his length, and her lips parted on a sigh. The next time his hand moved up his length, she moved, sitting up and he reached for her with his hand. She moved to her knees, as he stretched his legs out in front of him, and once he was settled, she straddled his hips, her arms curling around his shoulders, her fingers sliding into his hair and running through it.

Cullen's eyes slid closed, and he leaned back on his arms when she played with his hair, a groan rumbling from his chest. His hips pressed against hers, almost frantic with the need for release, and Talise whimpered, answering his motion with hers. Just as he would give in, and plead with her, small fingers wrapped around his length, and Talise leaned her head down to look, watching as she positioned his length against her opening. Her eyes lifted to his, holding his amber gaze with her summer bright one, as she sunk down onto his length.

Strong, powerful hands wrapped around her thighs, lifting her slightly, and Talise squealed when he wrapped her legs around his waist. She slid lower onto his cock, he was deeper than he had been, and she could barely breathe for a moment. The position meant she couldn't move much, but she started to rock and squirm against him, whimpering as she did so. Cullen groaned, burying his face in her shoulder, his large hands cupping the curves of her ass and holding her to him, his hips started to lift from the mattress, pushing deeper inside of her.

"Talise, I'm not going to last long…" he groaned out the words, pushing into her in small movements, rocking her body gently with each thrust.

"Me neither…" she was too sensitive still, and already she was shuddering, losing their rhythm, only to gain it again when he pulled her to him. Her nails raked down his back, digging into the muscle and leaving deep furrows.

"Maker… you're so tight…" he groaned the words, pushing into her harder, while tugging her to him, hissing in pain as she dug her nails into his back.

"Cullen…" she whined the words out, her legs shaking. She could feel her slickness leaking from her, wetting the tops of her thighs each time their bodies pressed together, "You're so deep.. I can't.."

"I've got you… let go love…" he murmured the words in her ear, nipping at her skin and then sucking skin marked by his teeth into his mouth. He continued to rock her onto his length in slow, steady surges, pulling her to him as his hips pressed into hers from the mattress. When she started to shudder, he moaned, feeling her tighten around his length, and he pulled her hips to hers, burying his length inside of her.

When he was as deep as he could possibly go, it tipped her over the edge, and she trembled in his arms, her body squeezing around his length in deep, rhythmic pulls, whimpering his name. Cullen responded to it, lifting his hips up from the mattress and pressing hard into her, his eyes closing as his climax overtook him. Long moments later, Talise lifted her head from his shoulder, her body shaking with aftershocks, and gently Cullen kissed her, his lips lingering over hers as he moved, tipping her back onto the mattress. Once he settled onto it beside her, he wrapped a muscular arm around him, pulling her small frame to his, and wrapped his fingers around hers, pressing kisses to the scar that ran across the back of her hand, silvery in the light filtering in through the open spot in his roof.

"Does it always feel that way?" She looked up at him, her eyes wide with wonder. Already small bruises and scrapes dotted her neck and shoulders, proof of Cullen's affections.

The sight brought a smile to his lips, and he shook his head no, "No. Never. I have never felt this way about anyone. And it has never been like that before."

Grinning, she buried her face in his shoulder, burying her face in his chest. One slim leg tangled with his, and she curled up against his side. The arm around her back tightened, pulling her to him, and he sighed, his golden lashes falling closed, "Will you stay with me Talise?"

"As long as you want me here." A soft kiss was pressed to his muscled chest, and she rested her head over his heart, listening to the steady rhythm of his heart, and the steady rise and fall of his breathing.

"Forever. I want you here forever." Sighing, Cullen relaxes back onto the mattress, smiling as his breathing evens and he drifts off to sleep. He still dreamt through the last of the night, but every time he jerked awake, or shifted uneasily in his sleep, Talise was there. She whispered to him, promising her love to him, her loyalty, telling him how much she admired him. Uncaring of the whispers and gossip that would await them in the morning, Talise stayed with him, falling asleep, and waking only when Cullen needed her, staying pressed against his frame through until well after the sun had rose.