This chapter is rated T (Bad language)

This is mainly just for my own enjoyment. Fill and slight crack. : D

I am SO SORRY for such a long wait! 8 O

Ink…

Chapter 9: Poseidon Has a Heart Attack

POV Change

Sally gulped and watched Amphitrite sit down across the table from her. They were in the kitchen. Percy had mouthed 'Good luck' and had left to spend some brother time with Triton. Sally wished Paul were here, but the man had taken one look, connected the dots, and fled.

Jerk. For not taking her with him.

Sally gave a little sigh. She didn't know how to begin. How does a woman begin a conversation with another woman whose husband she's had an illicit affair with? Sally wanted to burst out in hysterical laughter.

Amphitrite swallowed and spoke. "You must be an wonderful woman to have a son like Percy Jackson."

Sally smiled. "Yes…he's the best thing that's ever happened in my life." She blinked and looked down.

Amphitrite frowned slightly. "My…Poseidon is not?"

Sally flushed. "Um…well…Poseidon was nice…but…" She bit her lip. "I knew he was a god even before we…ahem…anyway, I knew it wouldn't last. Percy is my son. He came from me. I never knew that motherhood could be so wonderful." Her eyes misted with tears. "He's exceeded everything I ever dreamed. You know how a mother dreams of her child's future all the while the boy is still in the cradle?"

Amphitrite smiled and nodded.

"Well, it was like that. I was rocking his crib and looking at the sky wondering what would happen to him. Poseidon told me that children of the gods don't have very good lives…that's why I named him Perseus. Perseus was the only demigod who had a happy ending. I hoped it could be a good omen."

Amphitrite laughed and nodded again. Her eyes twinkled. "It had nothing to do with the fact that Poseidon brooded over his son being named after a child of Zeus?"

Sally blinked. Her eyes widened. "He brooded?!"

Amphitrite giggled. "Yes! He was acting like a toddler! Grumbling and complaining about how Zeus always buts into his life somehow!"

Sally started giggling too. Amphitrite took a breath. "Are you…still in love with him?"

Sally shook her head. "I mean…Poseidon is a very handsome man, but…" She looked where Paul had escaped. "He's unattainable." She sighed slightly. "He was kind to me, but Paul…Paul is permanent. He's steady. Strong." She smiled dreamily. "He loves me unconditionally. And I love him. Unconditionally." She looked at Amphitrite. "Poseidon no longer has my heart."

Amphitrite smiled. "I have to admit, I'm glad. That would have made things exceedingly awkward. Now, however, that that's done with…" Her eyes twinkled. "Perhaps you can tell me how you first met him?" Sally blinked.

Amphitrite coughed. "Unless it's too personal."

"No…no, it's fine." Sally chuckled. "I was walking along the beach once at Montauk, and I saw him. I didn't know then that he was a god. He looked like a thirty year old man." Sally giggled in spite of herself and leaned closer to Amphitrite. Suddenly, the two women were old college friends catching up in a coffee shop. "He was building a sand castle. Quite a good one too, but a child, mortal, came running up and knocked it down. He jumped up and started bellowing at the child so loudly that the poor little boy started crying."

Sally bit her lip. "I ran up between them and slapped him. I then started lecturing him about being polite and not shouting at children. When I finished, I picked the child up and took him back to where he said his parents were. Poseidon was just standing there thunderstruck and flabbergasted."

Amphitrite was laughing so hard, she was crying. Sally got up and started making them both coffee. "He saw me searching the beach for something and called out to me. I had dropped my flip flops when I ran over, and he had found them. We started talking about nothing in particular, and he invited me out for lunch." Sally shrugged.

Amphitrite sighed. "So the first time you meet you slapped his face." Sally ducked her head.

"And the second time too."

Amphitrite blinked. Her eyes gleamed. "Do tell…"

The rest of the afternoon was spent talking about Poseidon's embarrassing moments.

Two hours later

Poseidon came back and groaned as he sat on the couch in his room. He could tell that Triton and Amphitrite were still there. Suddenly he bolted upright. "Sally!" He yelped and rushed to her room. Paul was sitting at the desk. He glanced at Poseidon warily.

"Yes?"

"Sally! Where is she?! Amphitrite's here! Been here! Is she safe?" Poseidon's eyes were bugging out.

Paul started laughing. "Last time I saw them, they were talking in the kitchen. It was Percy's idea for them to meet."

Poseidon looked pale. "Talking? Like civil conversation?"

Paul was amazed at how similar Percy was to his father. He nodded. "Yeah."

Poseidon walked like that of a dead man and went to the kitchen door. He heard voices. Very pleasant, happy voices. What in Hades?

"…and then you crack the eggs and stir it up."

"Yes, but how do you make it so creamy?"

"Oh that's easy, just stir until not a single bump is left."

"Seems like a lot of manual labor."

Poseidon cracked the door open and spied on the two women. He nearly died. Amphitrite had her hair tied up and a pink apron on. Both she and Sally and flour smudges on them. She was holding a large metal spoon and was stirring vigorously in a bowl.

Poseidon felt faint. Sally saw him first. "Hello Poseidon! Want to lick the spoon? Percy loves to." Amphitrite took one look at her husband's face and giggled. Sally snickered and whispered something to the taller woman. Amphitrite nodded.

Poseidon fainted.

""Poseidon!""

POV Change

I growled and launched another attack at Triton. He laughed and deflected my water easily. "Growing tired little brother?"

I hissed and then tendrils of the pool water erupted and entangled him. He grunted and tried to break my will over them. Didn't work.

I chuckled. "And that's a win." I loosened him and grinned. "4 to 4. We're evenly tied."

He grinned. "I am honored to have a powerful younger brother. At least you aren't a weakling and a shame to my family."

I blinked. "You might want to brush up on your ability to compliment people. It's a little rusty."

He nodded. "I'll make a point of that." We grinned at each other and did a bro hug.

"I've never had an older brother before. This'll be awesome." My eyes twinkled. "Dude, have you ever done a prank?"

He turned slowly and looked at me. "A Prince never does pranks. It is below him." Suddenly, his face turned positively impish. "At least…that's what Mother says. I say to hell with that, and what did you have planned?"

I started laughing, loving how the Fates had turned this out. I opened my mouth to tell him what I had planned for the opposing gods, just a little prank, concerning spray paint and vandalism. When Sally and Amphitrite were calling to us.

"Percy!"

"Triton! Percy! Come here! Your father has fainted!"

I blinked. "Gods can faint?"

He shrugged. "Apparently."

I sighed. "Coming!" I turned to him as we climbed out of the outside pool. "I wonder what caused him to faint…"

Triton suddenly gripped my arm tightly. "Look!" His voice sounded strangled.

I looked and suddenly wanted to cheer. Amphitrite and Sally were laughing with each other. Amphitrite even had an arm around my mom's shoulders!

I blinked. "So that's why he fainted…"

Triton swallowed. "Let's go revive him." We flashed next to our mothers.

Mom hugged Triton. He blinked and hugged her back when Amphitrite glared at him until he did so. "Triton, I've been told so much about you, that you seem to be like a nephew to me now."

Amphitrite chuckled. "Sally, don't be politically correct. Triton is your son, and Percy is mine." Sally smiled.

"Of course. I didn't want to overstep."

Amphitrite smiled. "You're a very nice mortal. The nicest I have met." She nodded. "If Poseidon had to dally with someone, I am glad he chose you."

I blinked and stared at Triton. He blinked and stared at me. I whispered to him. "I think we've just entered the Twilight Zone."

He nodded. We all moved to the lounge where Poseidon was sprawled out, just now gaining awareness again. Triton slung an arm around my shoulders. I gave him a 'dude, what the hell?' look, and he nodded to our dad. Turning, I saw Poseidon gaping at all of us.

"What?" His voice was faint.

I shrugged Triton off me and moved closer to Dad. "Dad, Amphitrite and Triton came over, remember. Well, they wanted to make amends and start over. I agreed and then introduced Mom and Amphitrite to each other. It would seem that they too, have started over and are now friends. I think this is unusual and awesome. Don't you?"

He nodded and then gaped again. "This isn't happening. This isn't what usually happens…"

Sally looked at Amphitrite. "What usually happens?"

Amphitrite shrugged. "Triton and I usually curse the mortal woman and the child."

I blinked. "Seriously? You curse the kid?"

Triton flushed. "Jealousy is a powerful thing."

Sally stomped her foot. "No excuse."

Amphitrite looked embarrassed. "Apologies."

I sighed. "Fine. Let's get dinner ready."

Sally smiled. "Done. Amphitrite even helped me bake the cake!"

Amphitrite grinned. "Sally taught me how to cook!" Turning to me, she nodded. "You will call Sally 'Mom' and myself 'Mother'. It has been decided. Triton, you shall call Sally 'Mother' as well."

Triton blinked. "But I call you 'Mother'!"

She shrugged. "Call us both Mother."

I chuckled nervously. "One, big, happy…family?"

Poseidon groaned and slumped back on the couch. Triton sighed. "This could only happen with the Greek gods." I nodded. We roused Poseidon and went to eat dinner.

This was ever so slightly crack fic. I couldn't resist. I wanted Amphitrite and Sally to be friends. In a few of the accounts of the Greek myth stories I read, it said that Amphitrite wasn't as jealous as Hera was…soo, I ran with it and this chapter was born. *smiles innocently. Hope you enjoyed! (And yes, I did have a little bit too much sugar and caffeine before hand…but I couldn't bring myself to delete this darling little chapter.)

Ink…