I made my way down from the Hokage Mountain, wisely choosing to climb down instead of using the easy route sane people take. But I just couldn't be bothered by the length of it, so climbing seemed like a better option. When I got down, bruised and sweaty, I understood why Hinata didn't even bat his eyes and simply ran out to the classic route we came from.

Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he was a dog, and dogs, even in this world, still can't climb down a mountain.

The annoying part was that I had to wait for him to finally appear, and he looked way too nonchalant. Like I haven't been waiting for fifteen minutes until he dragged his furry ass down the fucking mountain.

I was starting to treat him as a human, a proof that I was really losing it.

I gave him a light pat on the head, and feeling somewhat grateful to him, I focused on finding the closest shop to get him some food. Every year, he's gotten larger, and I assumed it was because I fed him regularly, always finding something for him to snack at. Maybe sometimes even more than he could eat, which was right by me, at least I could have the leftovers. Not that I didn't get any food for myself, but I shared the unconditional love for food with my dog. We were so similar it was unhealthy. Even our reactions were similar. So, was I secretly a dog, or was he hiding a squished human in that furry body of his?

Well, maybe he ate one at one point of time, I didn't know.

We found a dango restaurant that was still open. Who was I kidding, restaurants here were open all the time. When did the poor people sleep? But it was quite convenient, so I waltzed inside with a huge, fake smile plastered on my tiny face and a large dog by my side. Hinata scanned the shop, sniffing the air for anything odd smelling before he let me proceed to the bunk I was prepared to glorify with my presence of a dirty, sweaty and whiny four year old. And I sure as hell was whiny today, never mind it was my birthday. No one gave me any present anyway. No human, I meant.

I didn't give a single fuck. Humans were useless idiots anyway. Not to mention they couldn't be used as a ladder to get to the fridge. Sure, they could be, but I doubted they would cooperate.

I walked over to the counter where a young woman was smiling her head off, her perfectly makeup-ed eyes so small I could barely make out what color they were. How could someone be so happy just by selling dango, I would never understand. Oh well, maybe she just wanted to appear charismatic or something to sell more of her cooked catastrophe, and obviously it worked because the number of customers was pretty high. So, I told myself I would try out too, open to a pretty surprise.

The counter was, as always, too high for me, so whistled at Hinata who let me use him as a ladder once again, and now I was tall enough for my eyes to reach over the counter, so I could talk to her without her talking to air.

"Hello? How may I help you?" the woman's smooth voice carried over the room. I was keeping my gaze lowered so she wouldn't see the freakish color. I played it off as my shyness.

"I- I would love some dango, pretty miss." I focused on warming up my cheeks, a trick I've learned long time ago.

"But of course, sweetie. What kind and how much?" she reached over to ruffle my hair, and had she know what kind of images flowed into my head that moment, she would run out of the door maximally disturbed. But I just smiled a bit more, as if in delight.

"Hanami, please." I bowed my head, as if sorry for even asking. "Three sticks."

"But of course darling, it's coming right away." She cocked her head to a side, gesturing to the kitchens behind her.

"Can… c-can I pay now?" I asked, still looking at the ground under my feet, careful not to destroy the whole process. If I looked up, she would most likely call exorcist on me. And I hated being wet, even though that damn liquid was supposed to be holy.

She nodded, so I pulled out all of the small coins from my pocket. Well, not all of them, but half at least. Sure, they weren't technically mine, but I took my birthday present whether Aiko gave me one or not.

"W-w-would that be enough?" I said in a voice full of false worry. It hit the target perfectly.

The woman only looked at it and knew it would be barely a half of the prize. But then she looked at me, an image of anxiety and good intentions, and she smiled gently. "Well…"

"You know…" I started, full of sadness. "It… is my birthday today, and m-my mom told me to get something because she's always busy with her clients and…"

Realization drew onto the woman's face, and I only now realized how it sounded. Now this is the universe telling me I should continue. She most likely thought my mother was a whore, at least that was how it sounded. It was something I rather welcomed. She crouched to be on the same height as mine, and gave me a sad smile filled with pity. "Here, " she took my outstretched hand and opened it, forcing the money back in it, "today, it's on the shop"

If I wasn't still in the role, I would scream in victory, possibly gangnam styled out to my box, but instead I just half nodded, planting a relieved and grateful smile on my lips, my eyes disappearing and leaving only slits with smile wrinkles on the corners. "Thank you, pretty miss." I bowed my head, and then walked to the closest box open. My smile changed from fake and plastic to the real, victorious one.

I climbed up my way to the seat, and smiled in satisfaction when I could finally rest my back. How good was this?

Hinata jumped in from the other side, scooting over to me and laying his head to my lap. That was silent for 'scratch me', as I learned from his various attempts to get me to do so, and then his vengeful plans when I ignored him. I started scratching and tugging on his scalp, and he literally purred like a cat.

"I think I just found my profession. I will be a professional dog massager." I chuckled, and Hinata howled in agreement. Tell me, wasn't he just a perfect dog?

"Oi! Stop being noisy!" a cold voice interrupted my peace, and I stopped scratching Hinata, instead I dug deeper with my nails. The poor dog howled in protest, trying to wiggle out of my grasp. I didn't let him, but masked my irritation and a near-heart-attack with a bright, if not a little mocking smile. I looked down at Hinata with a silent question in my eyes, and he moved his head towards the box behind me. I nodded slightly, and then shrugged. I was a child, after all, I had the luxury to do things I would not allow myself to even think of in my past life.

From the corner of my eye, I saw the woman bringing me the dango, with a soft look playing on her features. I quickly put my mask on, sighing in content as she put the plate in front of me. "Thank you so much, pretty miss." I smiled a board smile, showing my toothy smile with few of the teeth missing. I learned it was taken as cute between adults. So, why not use it when I still have the chance?

"You are welcome, sunshine." She ruffled my hair again, and now even Hinata glared fiercely at her. He knew how much I hated human contact. Luckily, she didn't notice it. She just turned her kimono clad back and walked to some other customer, a man with freakishly long white hair and a look like he wanted to eat her whole.

I looked conspiratorially at Hinata, who bared his canine teeth in what was supposed to be a smile. Again, this dog was damn too intelligent for his own good. I took one of the dango sticks, eyeing it sadly. Such a waste of food. Hinata gave me a shove, indicating he was ready to part with the food in order to have his revenge. So I slowly climbed on his back, and he stood up.

I only briefly saw the unruly silver hair that was literally everywhere, before I jabbed the sticky substance into his nest of hair. And I wasn't gentle at all.

The boy turned around, his face looking just as old as mine, and furious. His glare was so icy I felt like freezing in the very place. His teeth gritted, he tried to pull the sweet out of his hair, note that unsuccessfully.

I cocked my head to a side, looking far too amused. "and I did it without any noise, see?"

That was it. He literally fled out of his seat, and he almost radiated electricity. His expression mixed with horrified and furious one, and it was almost as if no one dared to do this before. Even with his black mask on his face, I could see how he reddened with anger, and it pleased me in the most odd way.

Suddenly, he gained his composure back, adjusting his green scarf. "you are a walking deadman." He announced, and with his light brows furrowed, he started walking slowly towards me, his posture more than threatening.

"Hinata…" I started frantically, reaching for the dog's fur. "Hinata…" I looked at the boy with wide eyes, and urged the dog to move. Hinata took one look at the boy, and immediately understood. We both ran out of our booth in rocket pace, sprinting out of the dango shop with me quickly snatching the remaining dango off my plate. With that, I exited the shop, a flicker of silver on my tail.

"Now…" I huffed while running, "we… have… fucked…up."

Hinata just looked at me, reminding me it was my stupid idea in the first place. I managed to glare at him, but he was totally unfazed. I guessed he just got used to my empty threats. I sprinted over the corner of the street, hoping to shake him off. That was when a flying kunai pierced the ground just few centimeters in front of me. I froze for a second. "That stupid kid is a ninja?" I wondered out loud, and fear mixed with fury shook through me.

"Yes, and that stupid kid is going to send you to a hospital." I turned around to see my pursuer slowly reaching me, dango sticking out of his already messy hair. He said it almost finally, like it was a sure thing.

"In your wishes, fucktard!" I turned around and continued running, which earned me another kunai flying past my precious face. Not for the face, darling, that's some important thing you are aiming at.

This unpleasantly reminded me of my escapes from the mafia families in my past life. But back then I was a grown woman with speed and more than decent agility. Sure, I still had the agility, but I had shorter legs so my speed was not nearly as high and efficient as before. So, I had to use my surroundings.

I saw a lighting conductor on one of the buildings, and I was immediately there, climbing up higher and higher until I reached the roof. I was breathing shallowly, due to the loss of oxygen. But that goddamned boy looked as fresh as a daisy, minus the dango stuck in his head.

"And what will you do now, huh?" I yelled at him, stupidly letting him know my position. Thanks to my pride, I let my cover blow. But I just wanted him to know I have the top hand despite him being a ninja. Thinking of it, if he was a ninja, why wasn't he wearing a headband? As far as my knowledge went, all ninja had to wear a headband as long as they belonged to a village. So, either he was a missing nin- but he appeared to be too young to be one. This was Naruto world, but even here weren't super-babies. Well, that Uchiha boy with long hair could be labeled as one, but… you know. I needed a tiny piece of hope that I wasn't that left out, considering my abilities were still nonexistent.

So, I assumed he was an academy student. Which was not much better, because he still out-leveled me. It also made me wonder why the hell was he so good in such a young age. After all, as far as I knew, ninja kids started their hellish training around the age of eight, so why was there a five year old chasing me around the streets of Konoha? This world was making less and less sense every day. Then again, what did I expect from a fictional world? Logic was shunned here.

Then he did something I should've expected. I really, really should've.

That bastard starting walking up a wall. Literally walking in 90 degrees, like it was normal. It wasn't. It was freaky at best, and I was starting to feel anxious about my own existence, I wasn't supposed to be here. This really wasn't a place fit for me.

"Fuck fuck fuckity fuck…" I chanted, watching him with wide eyes. Hinata tugged on my hair, and I looked up to him. Realization drew on both of our faces, and I switched to look on what I was holding in my small hands.

I waited patiently till he climbed up, and he obviously didn't care about the pace. He was so cocky and confident in his abilities it was both sad and amusing. After all, cocky asses were the first ones to die. Better be safe while knowing your abilities and your limits than being overly arrogant and not knowing where your possibilities end.

When the silver head stuck out of the edge of the roof, I smiled a rather unpleasant smile that made his eyebrows shot up. My lips stretched even more, and with a flashing speed, I removed the dango with my teeth and threw the stick at his forehead, making sure I hit the spot right between his eyes.

His reaction was priceless, and I doubled over laughing. His face morphed into a mortified expression, feeling the sticky piece of wood hitting his forehead in such a speed it left a small and red hole there.

I let out more of the choking sounds that I doubled as laughing, because I was such a lost existence I couldn't even laugh properly. "Now, this is just fun-fucking-tastic." I choked out in between laughing. "hopefully this would draw your nonexistent intelligence out." Saying that, I tapped my chin and shot him a mischievous look, "wait, you are not Hindi, so I doubt it would work…" I stuck the remaining dango stick in Hinata's mouth and watched him take the dumplings from it. I played with the stick with my fingers, swinging it. "Maybe we can try again." My board smile sent him on the edge.

"You stupid little-!" I didn't let him finish, because I threw the second stick at him, only a millimeter near the last spot. It blended into one, and now he had a large red hole in his forehead, with me laughing my ass off again. This was the most fun I had in ages. In four years, to be exact. Sure, I've been doing things like that before in my previous life, making fun of my opponents on daily basis, but this was just plainly amazing. Annoying a fucking ninja to the point his face swelled with anger.

Oh, my mother would be proud. Not.

But when I saw how his face settled on a cold expression of hatred, I knew it was the time to run. After all, he was a skilled fighter, and I was… well, an idiot for provoking him.

So, I turned on my heel, whistled highly to get Hinata's attention and then started running, leaping from one rooftop to another in the fastest pace I could muster up with my tiny legs. Hinata was right behind me, accompanying me with his loud barking to make go faster. The silver midget was starting catching up. As I saw a building taller than those two before, I started climbing it using all of my strength in my upper arms, and then swinging myself over the edge were the triangular roof started. I climbed up the one side of the roof, and then hopped on the another, lazily sliding down and then jumping off, landing right on my feet, one leg outstretched. I straightened up, with Hinata somehow landing right behind me. I knew the boy was right behind me, following me like a very fast shadow. And thank you, one was enough. I didn't need a second one in a form on a silver haired brat.

The first thing I saw was an open clothes shop, so I maneuvered my way through the crowd on the street and hid behind the curtain that served as door. I jumped behind the first figurine, and held my breath with Hinata hiding in a giant pile of clothes near one of the changing rooms. In my peripheral vision, I saw the brat entering the shop, his sharp eyes scanning for any sign of me or poor Hinata. Oh, why am I saying poor, that dog was just as guilty as I was. After all, without his ladder skills the plan wouldn't be successful in the first place. Every time the kid moved, I turned around the figurine and mimicked it's position, so I would be unnoticed. Somehow, it worked, and he left the shop with a scowl on his lips, making me sigh in relief. I was safe, fucking safe and no one could destroy the victory feeling inside me.

It was when an elderly woman screamed at her pile of clothes which suddenly grew a tail and when I saw Hinata sprinting out of the shop with the surprisingly swift grandma glued to his behind that I realized how fucked I was.