Love's Odyssey in Death's Design
VI
"Bellatri-? Bella? What on earth?"
Narcissa was struck dumb. It was incredible. Absurd. And it could not be merely a case of her seeing things because the witch that stood on her doorstep did not look a thing like her sister. Her voice did not even sound like Bellatrix's, but the tone - that petulant, exasperated tone - was quite familiar. Maybe. Or perhaps the loneliness was causing her to lose her mind. Funnily enough, the possibility of her going insane was a far easier concept to believe and accept than the idea of her dead sister somehow managing to come back to life in the body of another individual.
"Are you going to let me in or not?"
The blonde felt herself move away from the door in a silent invitation and watched, in grey wide eyed wonder, as the witch stepped into the foyer, the sound of her heeled boots striking the marble floor echoing off the walls. The walk was the same, Narcissa was able to immediately discern, but in the way it had been before the other's imprisonment in Azkaban, a lazy strut that was both arrogant and confident. A swagger that seemed entirely out of place as the face was not recognizable.
"Is it really you?"
A ridiculous question to pose now, considering she had already permitted the witch passage into her home, but one she needed to voice aloud anyway.
"Yes," the reply was given in a distracted fashion and Narcissa could see the reason was because the witch was currently regarding her reflection in the large looking glass above the mantle piece with a transfixed, contemplative expression. As if she was not quite sure what she was looking at, or studying her features to cement them to memory. Their gazes met in the glass. "It's an icebox in here Cissy, honestly, have one of your Elves start a fire."
The blonde clicked her fingers twice sharply, sending a call that was effectively received by a small House Elf donning a tea towel that was wrapped around its body like a Grecian toga. The Elf was relatively young, not quite full grown, but its ears flapped forward, its bulbous nose nearly touching the floor as it sunk into a low bow.
"Mistress has called for Teeny?"
"Light a fire," Narcissa ordered with a dismissive wave of her hand, still avidly and openly staring at the witch who had claimed to be her dead sister. Teeny did not seem to mind the cool, detached tone, nearly bouncing with glee to complete the request.
"How is this possible?" the Lady Malfoy murmured, taking a couple of hesitant steps in the other witch's direction, stopping herself before she got too close.
Bellatrix sighed heavily, having since stepped away from the mirror, and all but threw herself down upon a robin's egg blue colored settee, ignoring the flinch from her sister as the dried leaves and forest earth that sullied her cloak came into contact with the furniture's fabric. "A long story, that, but I want tea first. The strongest you have, with lemon, and a drop of -"
"Dittany essence," Narcissa cut in automatically, finishing the sentence in a soft though no less shocked tone.
Bellatrix smirked, chuckling softly in affirmation, "You know how I like it."
As the blonde only knew of one individual who took their tea in that particular fashion, that one individual being her presumed deceased eldest sibling, it provided the tiniest semblance of proof that this was in fact not some strange nightmare, but solid reality. She was not sure which of the two - nightmare or reality - was the most frightening, but when one had experienced hell and actually lived it, there was not much that could effectively top such a thing.
This however came close.
Once roaring flames came to life in the fireplace that had fallen into disuse since the Dark Lord had taken over the manor, Narcissa ordered the tea. Rather she ordered the witch's - Bellatrix's - tea, preferring now just hot water and lemon as the caffeine in the latter brew would more than likely make her more twitchy than she already felt at present. Perhaps she needed something much more potent than either. A straight shot of Firewhiskey would have done wonders for her nerves. But such would have been unseemly as now was certainly not the time to imbibe. Just the same, the House Elf, pleased beyond words to truly be of service after being more or less ignored for a fortnight, disappeared with a light pop to go fetch the beverages, leaving the two witches alone once again.
Not trusting herself to stand much longer, Narcissa took a seat across from the other, perching on the edge of the opposite settee. Her posture was stiff and prim, back straight, shoulders drawn back, her hands folded neatly in her a lap- a stark contrast to the way Bellatrix was sprawled in an uncouth manner upon the furniture, a habit of hers that had never ceased to irk the blonde.
"I truly cannot believe this," the words were spoken on a broken whisper, Narcissa allowing a sliver of the emotions she had been suppressing since she had first opened her front door to finally surface, "I thought you were dead. They, the Aurors, told me you had died in the Battle."
"I did," Bellatrix said, cocking her head to the side, her eyes narrowed, as if she were pondering a fleeting thought or about to ask a question and was indecisive as to which action she would go with, another one of her many quirks that the blonde witch could not help but notice, "Yes, that great red cow was the one to do me in. Shameful really, to die like that. But then, something brought me back."
Before Narcissa could begin to decode the frustratingly cryptic statement, Teeny's arrival was announced with a pop, the little Elf carefully balancing a Goblin wrought silver tea tray in its hands, large eyes shining with pride for having served its mistress and her guest promptly and efficiently. "Will there be anything else Mistress is needing?" the Elf squeaked, looking back and forth between the two witches once the tray had been set down, readily accessible to the both of them.
"That will be all Teeny," Narcissa stated with a curt nod and the little Elf disappeared at once.
Settling back slightly, she watched with a guarded expression as Bellatrix leaned forward to take her tea, bringing it to her nose to breathe in deeply the wafting steam and aroma. To some, it might look like a common gesture made by one simply seeking the comforts of a hot beverage, but the Lady Malfoy knew her sister well and so knew that it was not something half as simple or pleasant.
Seeming to detect nothing out of sorts, the dark witch sipped slowly from the porcelain teacup, her throaty sigh of satisfaction swallowed by the crackling of the fire.
"So this something brought you back from the dead?" Narcissa prompted pointedly, not at all caring about her own shamelessly conspicuous manner of speaking. Social decorum and civil discretion were not the priority in times such as these.
Bellatrix paused for a moment, toying with the pendant around her neck, as she regarded her youngest sister. It was evident that like everyone else she had encountered thus far, with one horrible exception that she refused to think on at present, Narcissa could not see her true face. It made the conversation difficult to start because the blonde had a guard up, the facade she erected whenever she was in the company of anyone that was not her immediate family. And even though it was clear that her sister had accepted that she was who she said she was, Bellatrix was able to bear witness to an obvious conflict within the other, an uncertainty that did not bode well for the acceptance of the secret she was being spurred on to tell.
No one but the Dark Lord had known about her Horcrux.
And it was after that moment of pause that Bellatrix decided that no one would know. Not if it could be helped. "I don't know what it was," she said, using her finger to swirl the contents of her cup before lifting the digit to her mouth to lick away the drop of tea, "It was strange though, chaotic, even for me. I'm in this body now. A fresh start, a second chance."
It was not an entire lie, the dark witch thought, but dear sweet Cissa of course could be counted upon. Her sister did not look at all convinced of the tale, her brows furrowed lightly as she tried to make sense of what truly made no sense.
"I have never heard of such magic," there was a bitter edge to the statement that did not go unnoticed but was ignored just the same, "How ever did you get here then?"
"Oh, that. I was aboard the Knight Bus when - "
Narcissa barely stifled a horrified gasp. "You traveled on that thing?" She shook her head slowly as she set her drink down on the tray. The Bellatrix she knew would never lower her standards and step foot on such a hideously Muggle-esque contraption. No self respecting Pureblood would ever. "You - ?"
"If you would shut up for a moment and allow me to finish my story," Bellatrix retorted, cutting her sister off, clearly torn between her own revulsion at willingly being a passenger on the Knight Bus, and blatant amusement at Narcissa's reaction, "There was an...accident and Potter's Mudblood assisted me the rest of the way."
The story was getting worse by the minute and Narcissa could no longer conceal her disgust. She suddenly leaped to her feet as if she had been stung by a particularly nasty Billywig though the action was still carried out with all the poise and grace befitting of a proper Pureblood lady, "Hermione Granger? She Apparated you to my home? You let that girl onto the grounds of my home and told her who you are?"
Bellatrix rolled her eyes, a gesture of annoyance and confusion brought on by how ridiculous her sister was behaving. At first it had been funny. Now, it was just becoming irritating. The time did not seem right to confess that said girl was the only person in the entire world who could actually see her true self so she had not exactly told the Mudblood anything, and as the Horcrux portion of the explanation had been omitted, it would not make sense to mention it now.
"She was on the bus as well and I haven't got my wand. How else was I supposed to get here?"
A dark gaze followed Narcissa's somewhat frenzied footsteps as she paced the length of the drawing room. After a while, the rapid clicking of her heels was the inevitable straw to break the proverbial camel's back, grating on the last of the former Death Eater's fragile nerves like the whining of a spoiled child, "Oh stop that," Bellatrix snapped waspishly, "You're overreacting Cissy. I'm the one in the predicament. Not you."
Narcissa too had reached her breaking point and she suddenly rounded on her sister, the blue of her eyes taking on the likeness of encapsulated lightning, "Lucius has been taken by the Ministry. He is facing life in Azkaban for his involvement in the war."
"Oh, sorry," the dark haired witch muttered around her teacup, hardly sounding sorry at all. And why should she? She had always thought Lucius Malfoy to be far beneath her sister's standards, not deserving of even a second glance, and Bellatrix had never hidden her far less than approving thoughts and sentiments on their marriage. But somehow Narcissa had convinced herself that she was in love with that sorry excuse for a wizard, foolish as it was. Still, his capture and impending imprisonment had nothing to do with her the now.
"Well, I haven't any belongings for your Elves to bother themselves with, as you can see. One of the spare rooms should be suitable, preferably in the west wing."
All of the intensity bled from Narcissa's gaze as she stared at the witch lounging carelessly on the settee. The witch who had proven to be her sister reincarnated. While somewhat true the story had been, intuition told her that there was much more than what had been stated, but she had no desire to pry for further information. Regardless of what else there was to it, the fact that Bellatrix had returned was evident. Was that not something she should want; a silver lining in the dark clouds that had rolled in and heavily shrouded the azure skies of her life? Of course, the eldest Black heiress could hardly be considered a cloud's silver lining. She was more like the promise of a tornado in a thunderstorm on her best days but she was, first and absolutely foremost, her sister. Right? She should be happy to see her living and breathing even if it was in the body of someone else, shouldn't she? But still, Narcissa knew that was not what required an answer. No. The true question was could she withstand another storm while she was desperately trying to rebuild from the rubble the last tempest had wrought? And she knew that she could not.
"You aren't staying."
It was Bellatrix's turn to jump to her feet, the teacup in her hands tumbling from her grasp, spilling its contents as the porcelain shattered against the marble floor. "What?"
The blonde licked her lips, a thrum of nervous energy causing her to tremble slightly yet she did not falter, "You are not staying here."
"Narcissa what the hell do you mean?" Bellatrix's brows rose as her eyes widened almost theatrically in her head but the sheer treachery of the statement had truly shocked her to the core.
"You're my sister, Bella. Even if I can't see it's you, I know it's you in my heart. And I love you, Merlin help me, I do. But this? It's all too much."
Love. That word again, that meaningless emotion. Again. Though this time, the utter uselessness of the word and all that came with it was rearing its hideous head. The dark haired witch laughed, her harsh cackle a resounding noise filled with scorn, well concealing the almost crippling hurt she really felt.
"Too much? Are Gobstones rattling about in that pretty blonde head of yours? How dare you speak to me about anything being too much?"
Narcissa lifted her hands in what could have been perceived as an appeasing gesture, or a submissive one, as if she were trying to ward off an attack that had yet to come. "I can't deny all the things you have done in the past for both Andromeda and I, nor will I ever do that, but you are very much aware of the losses I've sustained all in the name of the cause."
"Oh, I see it now," her sister trilled in that cringe inducing sing-song voice, the one that bespoke of madness, as she took a step closer, "This is about revenge! Ickle Cissy exacting her pound of flesh. Glad to know you've finally grown a spine."
The words were honed with venom and well aimed, meant to wound where it was sure to hurt. But Narcissa had been anticipating this and knew what shields to put up in order to block Bellatrix's deadly bladed tongue.
"No, it is not. This is about salvaging all that I have left, this is about protecting my family."
"I am your family, Narcissa!" The childish voice vanished, replaced by a gut-wrenching tone, almost a plea, that verily ached just to hear.
A heavy sadness filled the blonde's eyes for a moment before an icily passive expression slid into place as her resolve was enforced with steel. "My husband will be sentenced to Azkaban, my only child has not eaten or spoken in weeks. What do you suppose will happen if and when the Ministry and the Order is given the word by that wretched little Mudblood that I am harboring one of the Wizarding World's most wanted under my very roof?"
Bellatrix snarled, her anger, disbelief, and the pain of the betrayal well passed its peak. "No one would know it's me. You didn't even know until I told you, and even then you were not sure!"
Narcissa slowly shook her head, heat prickling beneath her eyelids, "It's too big a risk to take Bellatrix."
"I hate you."
And the dark witch wanted to mean it, wanted to mean it with every fiber of her being. Tears threatened to spill from her eyes, the desire to hate her sister in that moment so devastatingly strong. But no tears fell for she simply could not let it happen. So it was Narcissa who succumbed to the weeping for the both of them.
"I know," the words were strained, the voice cracking under the weight of the emotions that laced them, "Right now you may hate me, but one day you'll understand why it has to be this way. Even still, I can't bear the look of betrayal in your eyes right now." Despite the fact that they were not her sister's eyes, it was still like a sword thrust to the heart.
"Fuck off."
Swallowing, the lump in her throat making the action difficult, Narcissa turned her face away from the dark haired witch, her gaze resting on the dancing flicker of the flames in the fireplace. The charmed sconces on the walls. The cathedral ceilings. Anywhere but her sister. "I'm sorry," she murmured, so softly that in another circumstance one might have needed her to repeat herself. Now, the statement carried like a chilly northern breeze, "You have to leave. Please."
The word 'please' and its desperately beseeching tone was like a strong compulsion spell. Bellatrix had never been able to deny Narcissa anything. Ever. Funny how the sentiment could not be reciprocated when it mattered most. Years ago, practically in a different lifetime, Andromeda had done the same. To the both of them. History certainly did have a nasty habit, a perverse fondness for repeating itself.
She left, silently, without a backward glance. As she stepped out onto the manor grounds, the first stirrings of dawn were visible just along the eastern horizon. Taking a deep, calming breath, Bellatrix closed her eyes, centering herself, concentrating solely on the flow of raw magic that coursed through her body - flooding every cell, every muscle fiber, every bone - the magic that was as innate to her as breathing, and tapped into it. She could feel the change, feel how her tumultuous emotions finally found an outlet.
Soft down and feathers erupted first, then the talons, leading up to the odd sensation of her body shrinking in one way, lengthening in another. It was not painful, nor had it ever been, the taking to her Animagus form. A small trill of excitement surged through her at the confirmation that she had in fact retained the ability and she took the skies, her wingspan greater than she was tall while in her human form. A Verreaux's eagle, one of the largest birds of prey, adorned with a plumage of obsidian and cream. It had always been so fitting and such was the same now. The eagle screeched, long and shrill, shedding the pain like a snake molting its skin, the weightlessness of flight easing the emotional heaviness, the rush of the crisp morning air unraveling the knots of her tangled thoughts.
Author's Note: This was difficult to write and left me kind of emotionally drained. But all in the name of Bellamione, of course. That is the main goal here and I'm sure you all, or at least most of you will agree. Let me know your thoughts on this chapter though and, as always and forever, thank you so much for the reviews, the favorites, follows, the support in general! It's all like sunshine on a cloudy day, for real if you'll pardon the utter cheesiness of that particular statement. Until next time loves - bellanoire, over and out!