He followed her out into the evening sun and to her car. She turned on the engine in silence and then put on the radio. Without a word she started driving to the direction of his house. He knew she was really upset with him.
"So..uh how was work? Any more dumbass college kid horror stories?"
Sandy glanced to her side
"Not really"
"Eat anything good?"
"PB & J"
"What?"
"Peanut butter and jelly, Spongebob"
"Sandy I-"
"Please. Spongebob let me just drive"
Spongebob recoiled in hurt for the rest of the drive. Finally, they pulled up to his pineapple and she shut off the engine. They sat there for a minute. Neither of them knew what to say.
"Sandy…"
"Spongebob what exactly did you do"
Her gaze was straight ahead as if she were in a trance. She didn't bulge once.
"Sandy it's a long story…"
"Spongebob"
She turned to him
"What possibly could you have done as to having the bail being nearly a grand?"
"A grand?!"
"Spongebob…"
Her eyes started welling up with water. A few drops tapping along her glass bowl head.
"What did you do, Spongebob?!" Her voice louder now
"To put it bluntly…I broke into Squidwards house, stole his valuables, beat the shit out of him, and then got caught with coke at the Krusty Krab"
Sandy closed her eyes and put her hands to her face
"WHY SPONGEBOB?!"
"I NEEDED the money Sandy…you don't know everything that is going on in my life right now"
"But don't you see this affects ME TOO?"
Sandy gasped in between tears
"I'm a grand short and now the love of MY life might be behind bars for YEARS"
Spongebob sat in silence. He didn't know what to do to comfort her.
"I TRY so HARD to be good person…Lord knows I do…I keep MY nose clean…I try to make ends meet…I TRY to live my dreams as a scientist…and"
She turns again to Spongebob
"I try and be a really supportive girlfriend. I was considering MARRYING YOU. I knew you were down on hard times I get it…I grew up dirt poor. But…"
She wiped her eyes which transformed her sadness to malcontent. She started hitting the wheel with her fists
"I want you to read MY lips thud I am NOT someone to be reckoned with thud I WILL NOT be left lookin stupid and broken-hearted thud I WILL NOT let some fuck up FUCK MY LIFE UP!"
She started crying again
"You have no idea how hard I have worked to be where I am today…Spongebob…why didn't you just ask for help? I could have helped you find another job or-or sign up for government assistance…anything!"
Sandy covered her eyes again and sat for a moment
Spongebob became very ashamed and stressed. He had no idea if he was going to lose her or not. This might be it for them.
"Sandy…"
She didn't bulge
"I promise I will get your money back…I promise that I will do everything in my power to stay out of prison…Sandy please look at me…"
Sandy wiped her nose and peered upwards. Eyes all swollen and red.
"Sandy, I don't want to lose you…I one hundred percent own up to my mistakes."
Spongebob took out a cigarette and lit it with his lighter. Taking a slow inhale before continuing. The rolling underwater current filled in the quiet for the meantime.
"I promise to make this right for us"
Sandy shook her head
"Spongebob I want to be with you but…I need action not empty promises"
Ouch.
"I think…I think I need some time alone just to let all of this sink in, ok?"
She put her hand on SpongeBob's thigh.
"I don't want to end things with you…I just need to see that you're trying."
Spongebob nodded as he flung his cigarette out the car.
"Take all the time you need…I'll be a call away"
Sandy smiled slightly and gave him a hug
"Good luck Spongebob I really hope this is a wakeup call"
Spogebob hugged back with a "Thank you" and started making his way to the front door.
Once inside. He had that strange feeling from the jail again. As much as didn't want to admit it, He had no idea what he was getting himself into these next few days.
—-
Spongebob didn't show up to work for a few days. He was too sick mentally and physically. He couldn't get the look of Sandy's face out of his head. He was also too afraid of showing his face at work again and possibly getting into the wrong crowd. Why did he do this to himself? He drank and drank and drank. Liquor, vodka, schnapps, and wine. He didn't care if he mixed, he didn't care if he threw up. He barely ate as well. Chain smoking will do that. How do you think Dorothy stayed thin in Wizard of Oz? His house smelled of stale smoke and throw up.
"Mao"
Oh shit
"Gary, what"
"Mao"
When was the last time he saw him?
Spongebob looked over at his aging pet. Gary's shell color was fading, and the force of the ocean chipped away at the hard surface. His eye stocks were wrinkled, and he moved at an even more glacial pace than before.
Spongebob barely left his bed so getting up was hard. He rolled off and fell to the floor, slowly regaining stature. He checked his phone and found a few missed calls from work but not Sandy.
He went downstairs and opened the fridge. He sure as hell hasn't been to the store in a couple weeks. Ah.
"You like krabby patties?"
"Mao"
Spongebob chopped up a patty with a fork and slid the contents into the snail's bowl
"Bon Appetit"
He tried finding something for himself but came up short. He shook a cereal box and sounded it had some crumbs left
"Good enough for me"
He stuck his hand in the bag and grabbed a handful to snack on
Knock Knock
"Who the fuck is that?"
HIs heart jumped a little at the possibility. Could it be Sandy? Or…Bubble Bass?
He felt his ears burn at the thought.
Knock knock knock
"Hold on"
Spongebob opened the door to a disappointing surprise
"Squidward?" he groaned
"Spongebob."
SpongeBob crossed his arms and looked around to see if there were company
"It's just me Spongebob"
SpongeBob nodded
"What do you want?"
"Where have you been the past few days? I know Sandy bailed you out day of"
"You saw Sandy?"
"I mean she called but…anyways what's the matter with you?"
"I'm sick"
"You look fine to me…you haven't even called out or anything…did you get our calls?"
"Squidward I just told you I'm sick what more do you wa-... did you just come here to berate me or?
Spongebob narrowed his eyebrows
"Look, can we just talk about it...I feel we need to clear the air"
"I might be going to prison because of you"
"That's on YOU Spongebob and you know it"
"You made me do it"
"What? How?"
"Squidward, I fucking can't stand you. You treat me like shit despite me trying to be friends with you for years on end. But now you want to try and make up? After years of verbal abuse? Sabotage? Literally sending me to jail? NOW?!"
"Spongebob please I'm trying to do something nice for you if you just listen…"
"I wanted you to finally feel how I have felt being neighbors and coworkers with you for years. I finally got my chance and it felt so good…I DON'T regret it and I would do it again too"
Squidward's eyes glazed over, and his lip tightened
"I'm sorry"
"What?"
"SpongeBob I'm sorry for the way I've treated you"
Spongebob laughed
"I'm serious, Spongebob. My drinking hasn't been helping and I even join a local AA…I'm trying to get better I'm trying to say I'm sorry"
"Bitch you said sorry? Oh, wow I feel sooo much better! Is sorry going to get me outta jail? Is sorry gonna pay my debts? Is sorry going to get my girl back? Is sorry going to get me out of fucking here?"
Squidward stood in silence and then crossed his arms
"You fucking buddying up with Mr. Krabs sucking his dick and all! You both turned on me!"
Squidward shook his head
"When you're ready to talk…you know where to find me…I'm trying to help you out Spongebob"
"Burn in hell"
Spongebob slammed the door in his face and walked back upstairs.