"One...two...three!"
"Hmph!"
A hefty thud followed the throwing of a box onto the back of a moving van.
"I think that's the last of it for now..."
Sweat was thrown from a teal blue forehead and onto the ground.
"Squidward..."
The exhausted squid looked over from the van to a drenched squirrel sitting on the curb of his doorstep. A tubby pink star laid flat on the sand not too far away.
"Water...we need some water..."
Squidward nodded and walked past Sandy and into his home. The smell of kicked up dust and cardboard boxes filled up his nose as his eyes adjusted to the darkened interior. His house was emptier now. Boxes lay where his couch and chairs once sat. His cupboards empty of its usual contents. Fridge too. His bedroom only contained the imprints of his bed and dresser on the carpeted floor. Decades of dreaming and sleepless nights forever ingrained into the soul of the Easter Island head. His once bountiful art gallery filled with voices of the squids own thoughts and feelings now echo only footsteps. Squidward decided almost immediately after leaving the hospital and entering his home again that he needed to move right back out. He hadn't been in his home since they took him to the hospital so when he came back the house still was in a disheveled state. His bathroom belongings were spewed on the floor, along with dried piles of vomit. His bed sheets were strung out everywhere, the phone was lying beside a wall, and the downstairs furniture was pushed around from the gurney the EMT had to push through. He decided he needed a new start.
Over two weeks later and here he was.
Done with the Krusty Krab and done with his home. The house hasn't been sold, yet, but he found a cheap shared apartment to rent downtown in a no-bad-but-not-good area. The right side of the wrong side of the tracks. This is financially risky as most of his money is in the home but he is hoping someone will buy it shortly and be done with that neighborhood forever.
Squidward grabbed some cups out the boxes on the counter and poured water from the faucet for the three of them. He looked into the cups of glass and saw his own reflection bouncing around in the ripples.
He was scared.
He lived and worked on this side of town for twenty years. He was used to the same people, the same smells, and the same routine. There was nothing that could prepare him for uprooting his whole life and moving across town.
Squidward carried the glasses carefully through the living room and out the front door. Sandy was sitting on the front door step and turned her back to the sound of the door creak.
"Finally!" She squeaked as she reached for a glass.
Squidward walked over to Patrick who was still stone-locked in the same position on his back.
"Here you go, Pat" he placed the glass on the ground as Patrick opened his eyes.
Squidward went over to sit next to Sandy. She thew down half the glass already and was now just staring out into the distance. It was a warm sunny day and the rolling hills could be seen for miles across the street. The flowers in the sky were especially vibrant today.
The squid took a cool sip and then wiped his mouth.
"It feels so weird"
"What?" Sandy dashed her eyes to him.
"That I'm finally going"
Sandy took a sharp inhale.
"Ya definitely weird...but exciting too"
She continued with a smile.
"This is a brand new chapter for ya. Long overdue."
Squidward nodded as he turned to face Patrick.
"I can't believe I'm actually...sad...about leaving too. Like I always hated it why the hell am I so upset?"
"You got a lot of memories here Squidward. Twenty years is a long ass time and whether you like to admit it or not, you developed many relationships to people and things in that time period."
She faced him.
"That would be hard for anyone to just up and leave it all"
The squid shrugged.
"Ya well...at least its only across town and not like the other side of the country"
"Right, Squiddy, we'll all still hangout and stuff"
This warmed the heart of Squidward. At least he knew he had some support from Sandy, maybe Patrick too, to begin his new life in a part of town he'll know no one in.
Patrick walked over as he downed the glass and left a heavy burp
BBBBRRRRRAAAAAAAAAPPPP
The two other covered their noses and waived the air.
"Patrick, JESUS"
"It's like he swallowed a cadaver or something."
The two laughed at each others joke while Patrick sat down in the sand and got adjusted.
"Aw Squidward I'm gonna miss ya!"
Squidward smirked.
"I suppose hell froze over because I sincerely gonna miss you too, Pat. I really hope we stay in touch and catch up sometimes"
Patrick flashed a goofy smile and nodded.
"Now that Spongebob is bad and all you're my best friend now! There's so many movies we gotta see. While we're high as shit too! I'll have to make a list..."
Squidward and Sandy giggled as Patrick scrolled through his phone and then looked at each other.
"So where are you gonna work again?"
"Gotta job working at busboy at this quiet bar on the Strip. Decent pay and stuff. Might work myself up to bartender one day!"
"Ooooh so you're done with cashiering?"
Squidward snorted
"By god YES. I'm too tired of shithead customers I need some kind of change in my career"
Her mouth contorted to the side a bit.
"You sure gonna be alright? The Strip is not the best environment for people like us...might be too tempting"
He waved her off
"No need to worry, Sandra. I'm not gonna go relapse or anything. I'm still in an outpatient rehab program and got a sponsor at my AA to talk too."
Sandy looked into his eyes with a flicker of worry.
"Sandy..." He held her hand.
"I promise I'll be OK"
Sandy smiled and went to finish the rest of her drink before setting the glass back down.
Squidward continued.
"So what's the deal with you and Spongebob? Still ignoring him?"
Sandy wiped her paws on her pants and inhaled through her teeth.
"Honestly, Squidward, I have no idea how to go about this. I want to confront him and all but..."
She turned to him.
"Something feels off about this whole thing. Like if I say something he's really gonna blow up and go off the rails...especially now that uhh 'we' are talking and all...I don't know what but I don't feel safe around him anymore"
Squidward nodded slightly but deep down understood what she meant one hundred percent. Spongebob was deceiving and unpredictable. Who the hell would feel safe around him after the trouble he's been causing?
"...I know it sounds crazy cause he's so small but like...I think he would kill someone and not think twice about it y'know? He has no heart and that's terrifying"
Squidward muttered a "Ya for sure" and sat in silence for a moment.
Sandy sensed the shift in the atmosphere and made her way up to stretch out her limbs.
"Well I hope the best for ya Squidward...I probably should get home to get ready for work tomorrow. If you need help setting up stuff at your place just text me!"
Squidward smiled back as they all three stood up to hug each other. He landed a quick kiss on her cheek, away from Patrick's view, and pulled away. Patrcik waved everyone off as he walked to his rock and Sandy hopped in her car and started the engine.
"Hit me up too Squiddy! I know you need my strength" Patrick flexed his arms and laughed.
Squidward waved back before looking back at Sandy who was now reversing out of his driveway.
"Damn Squidward..."
And he walked inside.
Spongebob stood behind to the side of a gas station convenience store with his back against the wall. It was foggy where he was at. Surely a rainstorm should approach any minute now.
"C'mon where the hell are ya" he muttered as he checked his phone.
A loyal customer and some of her friends were supposed to meet him about some pills and weed. For the first time in history, a dealer was on time and the customer was the one late. Spongebob was growing impatient and didn't like the idea of loitering around the same spot for a while. He put his phone back into his pocket and peered up through the fog to see if anyone is approaching.
"What the..."
It was Juney as he expected. But the other men he had never met before and looked a bit...
"Strange"
Both men were red-eyed and tired. Neither of their heads were combed and their skin, across the whole body, was dotted with unhealed wounds of sizes ranging from a bead to a coin. They were wearing tank-tops with stains adorned on them and gym pants. Juney still looked herself, albeit a little skinnier.
Spongebob placed his hand on his right pocket and felt his firearm. These guys looked trouble.
Juney stumbled up towards the curb and rubbed her arms.
"Boy it's cold outside ain't it?"
Spongebob looked her up and down and shrugged his head.
"I guess so. For the South Pacific at least"
Her blonde hair bounced on her shoulder as she reached for her wallet to pull out some bills.
"You've been doing alright?"
Spongebob nodded slightly and mustered a "ya"
He kept glanced at the two men beside her. They both towered him and looked at him. Their eyes were distant however.
"You? Still at AA?"
She giggled, eyes down, while handing him the bills
"Pft nah no I decided I'm doing alright at the moment"
She met his eyes.
"Missed sleeping in on Sundays anyways"
Spongebob smirked while grabbing the bundle and reaching in his pocket for a couple of bags.
"Here ya go"
He glanced his eyes at the men once again before returning to face Juney.
"Stay outta trouble ok?"
She laughed as she waved goodbye. With that her and the boys crept back into the ocean fog and into oblivion, leaving an anxious sponge in their wake.
"Guess I better eat or something. Should have some leftovers..."
Spongebob walked across the parking lot and onto the main road. His feet were moving fast but was only half the speed as the churning of his mind.
Spongebob heated up some leftover lasagna and plopped his ass on his red chair with a late in one hand and a beer in the other. He gripped the remote and flipped through the channels trying to find something decent on.
"Want to kill yourself? Try KRILLZAULTA™ today! Side effects might include death-"
"Jesus Christ"
Spongebob found one channel of some adult cartoons and relaxed his muscles. He took a sip of beer before a thought popped in his head.
"Oh shit the-shit!"
He launched himself up and ran upstairs into his room. His door was still demolished so he had to skip over the rubble and turned his body to find his closet. His yellow hands slid open the creaking door and met his eyes with a white box. After the robbery, he was able to make some of his money back. At least enough to hold off Bubble Bass for a while.
"You better pay the other half next week Spongeboob! I don't care if you have to rob my shit BACK!"
Spongebob pulled out a couple of wads from the box and found some envelopes to put them in. He still owed Sandy and Squidward some money and wanted to make something finally right. The frycook had to even throw in some of his paycheck for these debts.
"Best to just get this shit over with once and for all"
Spongebob brought the envelopes downstairs to the kitchen to find a pen and stamps. The TV was blaring something indescribable in the background as the kitchen lights flickered. He pulled open a drawer to find what he needed and wrote the information to send to Sandy's address, then just a note on the front for Squidward. He looked at Squidward envelope for minute.
"I'm so fucking sorry Squidward"
The yellow sponge made his way outside and up to Squidwards door. The upstairs light was on indicating he was prepping for sleep. In fear of causing alarm, Spongebob tossed the envelope onto the front step before making his way to his own mailbox. His blue eyes saw the oversized moving trucked parked out front. This came as a surprise to him as well. Squidward was always threatening to move out for past two decades but never did. It was always just empty threats. Even when Spongebob assaulted him, the stubborn squid didn't bulge. The squid must've grown really attached to this place, Spongebob thought. It had to take being almost killed to finally shake him off that damned Easter Island head.
Approaching the mailbox he gripped Sandy's envelope tighter. Why hasn't she responded? Is she ghosting him? Is she hurt? It just doesn't make any sense.
"Where the fuck are you Sandy"
He opened the lid and was surprised to find a couple pieces of mail inside already. His hand pulled them out before placing his own inside and closing the lid. He put the flag up before heading inside again.
"What the...Oh fuck-"
The first letter was from the county court system. The rest were junk mail.
"Ten days?"
He looked up at his living room and talked to no one aloud.
"Why the fuck wasn't I given an attorney to contact? Isn't there supposed to be some kind of process?"
He read on and found that there was indeed an attorney to call. Provided by the state of course. And to call immediately.
Spongebob checked the clock on the oven and saw it was almost ten at night. Whatever lawyer he got probably is wine drunk in their bed by now. Ten fucking days until he is set to stand before jury about that coke he had on him many moons ago. He is just hoping they let him off with some community service or something.
Either way. He just wants to be done. His body tires.