honestly with where my mind went when I first read the day's theme you're just lucky you're not getting some being john malkovich type monstrosity….. aaanyways TheatreTM kank is best kank and I love writing bickering sand sibs so enjoy this complete mess!
Day 6 - Kankuro AU
"Gaara, what the hell are you doing?"
His brother gave him a stare that was only marginally more blank than the one he'd been wearing five seconds ago. "…What you told me to do."
Sighing, Kankuro sat heavily on his messy bed, wrapping an arm around his brother's shoulders to drag him down with him. He looked deep into narrow, pale eyes as he said in the gentlest tone he could manage, "Gaara, bro, you're great and I love you, but there is no world where what you just did counts as acting."
"I was pretending to be someone other than myself, that's all acting is."
"Ok, yeah, technically," he said, releasing Gaara's skinny shoulder to wave a hand vaguely, "if we're going by strict definitions then you were acting, but you weren't acting, y'know?"
A long, slow blink was all the response he received. In the corner, Temari snickered.
He barrelled on regardless, "Real acting is more than just reading out a script, you have to feel the character, deep in your soul, you have to really become them, understand every tiny aspect of their being, know how their mind works, their darkest desires and oldest memories. You're good at remembering lines, but you've got no soul, you sound like you might as well be reading a shopping list."
Green eyes narrowed even further. "Does it matter? This is supposed to be practise for you, not me."
He groaned, wishing that just this once his brother would stop being so rational and boring. "And how am I supposed to get into the role when I'm practically talking to a brick wall! Temari, back me up on this."
Gently rocking in his desk chair, his sister gave him the look that let him know she was about to be an absolute bitch. "Actually, I thought he was doing a very good job, you're just being dramatic."
"I'm an actor! I drama! That's my literal job!"
She snorted. "Mhmm, you know they say that the mark of a true actor is in their subtlety-"
"There's a difference between subtle and flatter than your ass, sis. No offense Gaara," he said, patting his brother on the shoulder.
"I really don't care-"
"I have a flat ass?" Temari snapped, leaping to her feet and stomping towards him. "What do you call that bit of soggy, shapeless paper you've got then?"
He let out a scandalised gasp, placing a hand over his heart as he slowly rose to his feet to meet her gaze head-on. "I'll have you know that my ass is a thing of beauty and Sai has an entire sketchbook dedicated to its glory."
Her face immediately crumpled up, looking at once ready to burst into laughter or let out a horrified scream. She eventually settled for a disgusted grimace as she said, "Sai's willingly dating you, they aren't exactly an arbiter of good taste."
"Please stop talking."
Ignoring Gaara's request, Kankuro smirked down at his sister. "If I'm so unappealing then how come I've actually got a partner and you don't, huh? Huuuhhhhh?" He leaned in closer, though prepared to leap back at any second; his sister's eye was twitching quite rapidly.
She opened her mouth, then snapped it shut again, eyes burning pin-point holes into his.
The longer she went without saying anything, the more worried he became, but he'd dug himself into this hole, no way was he going to show weakness by crawling back out now, he'd just sit here in his dirt pit glaring at her until one of them finally broke down and attacked, as was the Sabaku way.
The cough from behind him didn't make either of their stares falter, nor did the ten-second long groan the littlest brother gave. It was only when he began to speak that Kankuro had to react.
"The depths of my loathing for you knows no-"
"Oh, for crying out loud." Spinning in a perfect circle, he snapped the script from Gaara's slack hands and shoved it into Temari's chest. "That's it, you're up sis, try not to be the literal sound of paint drying, m'kay? No offence Gaa."
The muttered, "I really don't care," was barely audible over the crinkling of papers as Temari caught the script and flattened it out, quickly scanning the lines he'd been attempting to rehearse before his completely wooden practise partner finally got to him. She rolled her eyes, cleared her throat and held one hand out towards him.
"The depths of my loathing for you, knows no bounds-" her fist clenched dramatically, "-if I had but one wish, I would leave the world to wallow in squalor, just to remove your ungodly presence from it!"
At that he had to sit back down again, then drop his head into both hands as he sobbed. "My baby brother and big sister are both philistines, how could I have failed you so badly…"