Chapter 2- Day 2
After Kaiba cleaned off the half-digested dog food from his face, he decided that getting real food for the blonde would be beneficial for his own mental state. After all, having Joey-germs sprayed across his face was not very high on list of Things I Must Do Before I Die.
Joey, of course, requested (read: demanded by means of threatening to shave off Kaiba's eyebrows in his sleep if his needs weren't met) a disgusting blob of grease smothered in cheesy goo and tomato gunk, also known as pizza. It was also covered in every topping known to mankind. And a few others that no decent human being would even think to eat. Joey ate it all happily.
Upon Kaiba's comment on the inedibility of the food, Joey had decided that it would be a good time to redecorate Kaiba's kitchen and face. For the second time in the past hour, the brunette found slimy food dripping from his nose. Kaiba immediately decided it wasn't one of his favorite feelings.
The once immaculate room - and the brunette - now resembled a battle zone.
The spoils of war: The stripping of Kaiba's dignity.
The victor: The "All-Mighty" Joseph Wheeler.
Choice of Weapon: Nuclear Pizza.
The two boys sat on the kitchen floor, panting. One blonde was laughing breathlessly, while a brunette was glaring daggers at said laughing blonde. When the pair had regained their breath, Kaiba walked over to a closet and took out a broom and mop. Silently handing one to the blonde, they quickly set to work on cleaning.
Surprisingly, Joey did not complain. Though that could have something to do with the fact that Kaiba's glare said something along the lines of If you value your organs inside of your body and your head connected to your neck, you will do exactly what I say. My word is law, and you will clean your mess.
Joey began to clean his mess.
After a few moments of frenzied mopping – how the hell did raw eggs get on the floor? He only threw pizza, for pete's sake! – Joey took a moment to glance at the tall brunette who didn't seem very happy about having to clean. More surprising than the fact the brunette hadn't called on a maid to do the job for him was the fact that he had not yelled at him for being a clumsy, messy mutt, or something of the sort.
This has got to be one of my more…odd…experiences. Who would have imagined that I'd be cleaning with Kaiba? Plus, we're not even really fighting…well, not yet anyway… Joey stood still in his silent reverie until the taller teen threw a wet rag at the blonde's face. Joey growled. Oh, it's on, Kaiba-boy.
This resulted in Joey throwing a soapy sponge at Kaiba, and almost caused Kitchen War II. Mokuba, however, had walked into the kitchen once more – and not a second too soon, as Kaiba had just decided that the butcher knife would be a pleasant choice of ammunition - and suggested that they watch a movie later that night. He turned his pleading eyes to his brother, silently begging him not to kill his new toy (read: Joey).
Kaiba just gave a half grunt, very reluctantly putting the knife back, and the slightest nod of approval. After all, who could say no to Mokuba? Joey jumped up and down in excitement – Theater-sized plasma screen TV, here I come! - but his foot managed to slip on a particularly large piece of pepperoni still stuck on the floor.
A moment later, after blinking the stars out of his eyes and watching all of the pretty Kaibas flittering above his head, Joey briefly wondered how he ended up on the floor. Then he decided that he didn't care. Watching a bunch of Kaibas with wings and pink tutus flying above his head was disturbingly amusing. Pretty Kaiba ballerinas floating above his head. It was kind of like one of those cartoons, when a character falls on their head and suffers a concussion…Joey paused. Wait a second. That probably was not a good thing.
Suddenly the real Kaiba appeared over him, blocking out some of the light from above, forming an ethereal halo around his head. He was wearing a look of concern, something that seemed highly unnatural of his face. The muscles seemed to be spasming in protest. In fact, Joey was sure that he was imagining it, and could be evidence that he may have a concussion.
"Are you alright? I think you might have blacked out for a few seconds. You were staring into space." Joey frowned. He was also imagining the sound of a concerned Kaiba. Also pointing towards the possibility of a concussion.
Joey blinked. "Actually, I was just thinking that you would make a nice ballerina." Then he clamped his mouth shut, unable to believe he said that out loud. Yep, it was official. He had a concussion and killed off the last few brain cells he had left, because there was no way in hell he would ever say that if he were lucid.
Kaiba's look of shock and horror at such a mental image was enough to console Joey from the loss of his brain cells. It even put him in a good enough mood to want to get up from his comfortable position on the floor.
Joey was disappointed once again, however, when Seto's haughty smirk came sliding back into place on his face.
"I should have guessed that a fall like that would have destroyed what few brain cells you have left, mutt," the brunette sneered, unaware of Joey's previous deduction. "I guess it's my fault, though." At this, Joey's jaw dropped at the seemingly apology. Forget the concussion, he must be in a coma or something. Or dead. Dear God, he was too young to die! No way would Kaiba actually apologize in real life.
However, Kaiba continued, "I suppose the master will have to take better care of his pet. Puppies, after all, can't be expected to look after themselves." Joey resisted the urge to growl like an insulted puppy. So it wasn't a real apology. Well, at least Joey knew he wasn't dead, after all.
Joey was about to jump Kaiba for that remark, but a slight cough from behind him made him stop. The raven-haired brother put his hands on his hips impatiently, after waiting so long for the two to stop fighting. "I want to watch a movie," he complained, lip sticking out in a pout. It was such an adorable look that the two teens caved in instantly.
Seto and Joey glanced at each other and silently decided to call it a temporary truce. For Mokuba's sake. Mokuba cheered and ran out of the room, his whooping cheers echoing behind him. Kaiba and Joey walked through a few halls and up a flight of stairs at a much slower pace, and finally came to a room that sent Joey right back into fits of glee.
Like the kitchen, and most likely every other room in the mansion, it was gigantic. There was a giant leather three-seater couch, a dark blue like everything else in the house, a very large high-tech TV – Joey cheered inwardly – and Kaiba's own personal Blockbuster. The entire wall was filled with movies! Joey could almost feel his eyes popping out of his skull. Seriously, the brunette must have had every DVD known to man!
"Am I in heaven?" he whispered in awe, eyes still bulging. He glanced over at Kaiba, as if to make sure he wasn't dreaming, who didn't seem to appreciate having the blonde drool all over the rug beneath their feet. Deciding this was, in fact, real, Joey let out a war cry before running over to the case to wage battle against the numerous choices that lay before him.
Scrambling to the top of the video case, he proceeded to inspect each and every movie. Starting from the very top, he pulled the movies out one by one, tossing them haphazardly over his shoulder. And he could have been a baseball player in a past life, because those DVDs had some speed to them.
Every now and then the Kaiba brothers could hear the blonde mumbling comments to himself as movies arched through the air. They turned to stare blankly each other and eventually shrugged. What else could they do? And it wasn't like the blonde had broken anything or hurt anyone. And then a flying DVD whizzed past Kaiba's face, just half an inch from his nose, with enough force to take down a small elephant.
"Would you watch it?" Kaiba growled harshly, only to earn another video to the eye. Now it was the brunette's turn to lie on the ground, blinking back stars. After a second or two, he attempted to get back up, but decided to duck for cover behind the couch after another DVD shaved off a few hairs from his head. How the hell did they get sharp?! He quickly grabbed Mokuba and ran for it.
Spotting the spacious couch – Ha! Sanctuary! – the poised, dignified, multi-billionaire CEO of a worldwide prestigious company took a bodily leap and dived headfirst into safety.
As the two brothers regrouped – Kaibas never cowered, which they definitely were not doing, mind you - behind the very large piece of furniture, they could hear loud crashes as the sounds of very expensive things shattered into millions pieces of worthlessness. Kaiba could only cringe at the idea of the damage Joey had caused.
"Yes!" Joey cheered. Kaiba peaked cautiously over the blue upholstery, fully ready to duck back down if the projectiles had not stopped, to find Joey holding his prize covetously. Apparently Joey had gone through every movie in the house, effectively obliterating every moment of hard work Kaiba had put into alphabetizing the entire bloody thing.
The carpet was virtually invisible, and all that could be seen was an endless sea of various movie cases. Joey grinned and held up his trophy, the movie Zoolander, the only one that had not been carelessly tossed to the floor. Kaiba had a strong suspicion that Joey only picked that movie because it was the last movie left in the case that had not been used to try to take out the brunette's eye.
Kaiba sighed wearily, but dutifully cleared a path to the couch. Mokuba cheered excitedly, and ran back to the kitchen to make a large bowl of popcorn. Joey and Kaiba glanced at the couch, which would comfortably sit three people, and quickly grabbed opposite ends of the couch. There was no way the two would ever willingly sit next to each other!
The time it took for Mokuba to return with snacks was filled with an awkward silence between the two teens. When the shorter boy returned, he sighed at the two boys practically sitting on their respective armrests to put as much distance between them. Mokuba sat in the middle, coaxing the two teens closer with the promise of sharing his popcorn. Joey was instantly right beside Mokuba, eagerly plunging his hand into the bowl of buttery goodness. The brunette dimmed the lights and the three were plunged in darkness.
The movie started, and everybody was laughing – well, a blonde and a raven-haired kid were laughing, and one stoic brunette was glaring ahead at the TV screen - and enjoying their selves. Joey was enjoying the popcorn very much—it tasted just like the movie theater stuff. Joey wouldn't doubt for a second that he had an actual popcorn machine just like in the theaters. He was definitely rich enough to afford it. Joey, not about to pass up the opportunity to make good on his promise to eat Kaiba out of house and home, was taking very large handfuls from the bowl about every two seconds.
After half the bowl had been depleted, Joey paused a moment to breathe. "You haven't eaten any," Joey pointed out to Kaiba.
"You've eaten enough for both of us," he shrugged nonchalantly. He didn't bother to mention the valid theory that if he were to stick his hand in the line of attack, he was very likely to lose a finger - or even a whole hand - to Joey's insatiable appetite. Little did he know, that is exactly what would have happened. Never come between a hungry blonde street punk and his salty, buttery world of popcorn goodness.
Joey pouted, slightly disappointed that no one seemed willing to eat the popcorn with him, and turned back to the movie. A few seconds later, however, he found himself grinning when Kaiba took a handful of the buttery substance. The slender brunette was pleasantly surprised at how delicious it was, and took another. Joey inwardly cheered, but didn't seem to notice the small smile that crept onto his own face.
The two continued to eat on in companionable silence, totally unaware of the smirk on Mokuba's face as he watched the two eat on in companionable silence, for about ten more minutes, until Kaiba and Joey both reached for the last handful at the same time.
Their fingertips brushed against each other slightly, enough for Kaiba to register that his hands were really greasy and would definitely need to wash them, but in that one split second, both felt a shock of electricity jolt up their arms. They looked at each other, a clash of cold blue against warm honey, and as their eyes locked Joey felt himself wondering why he hadn't moved his hand yet.
Mokuba sneezed, inwardly groaning at himself, and the moment was broken. Kaiba hurriedly turned the other way, coughing into his hand in a slightly dignified manner.
Joey, however, being the rash person that he is, handled his embarrassment in an entirely different manner. By filling his mouth so full that he would not be able to say anything to make this moment even more awkward. He scooped every last bit of the popcorn and stuffed it into his mouth. In his embarrassment, he forgot to chew – come on, this is Joey here. It could happen - and started to choke.
Mokuba and Kaiba rushed to Joey's aid – and by this I mean that Mokuba ran to help the poor blonde, while Kaiba stood in the background muttering about foolish mutts - as his face began to turn blue for the second time that day. After a lot of heavy patting to the back, Joey finally managed to swallow. He took several gulps of sweet blessed air.
Kaiba's eyes narrowed. "You're a hazard to yourself. I don't know how you've managed to survive this far." He inwardly tried to convince himself the only reason he would care if Joey choked to death was that he didn't want to deal with the hassle of so much paperwork. Yeah. That was why.
Joey's eyes flared up in response, filled with his fiery energy. He had every intention of telling Kaiba where, exactly, he could shove his stupid opinions. Before he could respond, however, Kaiba stood up briskly, very carefully not looking at those burning eyes, and brushed off his clothes.
"I think we should all go to bed. It's been a very long and tiring day. For all of us," he added, finally gracing the blonde with a sneer. With that, Kaiba strode up to his room, not glancing back. Joey and Mokuba, still sitting on the couch, looked at each other, and shrugged. They might as well do the same.
Up in Kaiba's room, the brunette typed incessantly and furiously on his laptop. What was he thinking, taking in the stupid mutt for an entire week? He wasn't sure if his sanity would be able to handle it. His deep blue eyes scanned over the screen as he analyzed his report, and a flash of burning honey eyes flashed in his mind.
He stopped for a few moments, staring into nothing. He thought of the blonde's rambunctious laugh, and his incorrigible energy. And he thought of greasy, buttery fingers touching for the briefest moment. He held up his hand that had touched Joey, and just stared confusedly at it.
Up in Joey's room – which, of course, was freaking huge! – the blonde was getting dressed in his pajamas. He slid the cotton pants over his hips, and struggled to fit his tank top over his mop of messy hair. He walked around the room, whistling to himself appreciatively. Kaiba sure didn't hold back with his decorating budget!
He paused in front of a hanging mirror, and looked at himself. He reflected over the day, and was surprised to find that it wasn't half bad. He looked at his reflection, talking softly to himself.
"This was definitely a weird day, but you know, it was actually kinda fun with Kaiba." The blonde paused, and stiffened. Wait just one second. Rewind. Play. Fun. As in, with Kaiba.
His eyes widened considerably, realizing what the hell he had just said. Fun. And Kaiba. Used together in the same thought.
Oh God.
He ran into the bathroom to wash his mouth out with soap.