There was once a hunter named Sesshomaru who used often to spend the whole night stalking the deer or setting traps for game. Actually he still does; he's quite the stalker. He was also a perverted Peeping Tom.

One night that he was hiding in a clump of bushes near the lake to look for some wild ducks that he wished to trap and make into another furry boa. Suddenly he heard, high up in the air, a whirring of wings and thought the ducks were coming; and he got his sword ready. I don't know how he hunted with a sword; he just did.

But instead of ducks there appeared seven girls all clad in robes made of feathers, and they alighted on the banks of the lake, and taking off their robes plunged into the waters and bathed and sported in the lake. And Sesshomaru leaped for joy inside his mind because there was nothing a Peeping Tom loved more than stalking on young girls and spying on them bathing.

They were all beautiful, but of them all the youngest and smallest pleased most the Sesshomaru's eye, and he crept forward from the bushes and seized her dress of plumage and took it back with him into the bushes, grinning like a psycho.

After the swan maidens had bathed and sported to their heart's delight, they came back to the bank wishing to put on their feather robes again; and the six eldest found theirs, but the youngest, named Kagura, could not find hers. They searched and they searched until at last the dawn began to appear, and the six sisters called out to her, "Go fuck yourself! You should've kept track of your robe anyway and it's not our fault you lost it." And with that they donned their robes and flew away, and away, and away. And away. And away. And away. And away. And away. And away .And away. And away. And away. And away. And away. And away. And away. And away.

When Sesshomaru saw them fly away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away and away,he came forward with the feather robe in his hand; and Kagura slapped the living shit out of him for stalking her and spying on her like a pervert before demanding that he gave her clothes back.

He gave her his cloak but would not give her her robe, feeling that she would fly away. He asked her out on a date and Kagura said yes, for he was very sexy. So he took her home and while she was drunk, he hid her feather robe where she could not find it. Sesshomaru hoped to get laid but did not.

So they were married and Sesshomaru finally got laid; and had they two fine children, Hakudoshi and Kanna, who grew up strong and beautiful; and Kagura loved them with all her heart.

One day Kanna was playing at hide-and-seek with Hakudoshi, and she went behind the large rock that had a sign on it saying "There are absolutely no feather robes hidden behind this rock" to hide herself. She found there a robe all made of feathers, got angry at the sign for lying to her and took it to Kagura.

As soon as she saw it she put it on and said to Kanna, "Tell father that if he wishes to see me again he must find me in the Land East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon;" and with that she flew away.

When Sesshomaru came home next morning Kanna told him what had happened and what her mother said. So he set out to find Kagura in the Land East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon...believing that a land with a name like that actually existed. But hey, it's a fairy tale so anything could exist.

And he wandered for many days until he came across the wolf demon Koga, who had fallen on the ground, and he lifted him up and helped him to a seat and stalked him-I mean, tended to him until he felt better.

Then Koga asked him what he was doing and where he was going. And he told him all about the swan maidens and his wife, and he asked the Koga if he had heard of the Land East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon.

And Koga said, "No, but I can ask."

Then he uttered a shrill whistle and soon all the plain in front of them was filled with all of the beasts of the world, for Koga was no less than the King of the Beasts.

And he called out to them, "Who is there here that knows where the Land is East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon?" But none of the beasts knew.

Then Koga said to the Sesshomaru, "You must go seek my brother Inuyasha who is the King of the Birds," and told him how to find his brother.

And after a time he found the King of the Birds, and told him what he wanted. So Inuyasha whistled loud and shrill, and soon the sky was darkened with all the birds of the air, who came around him. Then he asked, "Which of you knows where is the Land East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon?"

And none answered, and Inuyasha said, "Then you must consult my brother Miroku, the King of the Fishes," and he told him how to find him.

And Sesshomaru went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, and he went on, until he came to the King of the Fishes, and he told him what he wanted. And the Miroku went to the shore of the sea and summoned all the fishes of the sea. And when they came around him he called out, "Which of you knows where is the Land East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon?"

And none of them answered, until at last a dolphin that had come late called out, "I have heard that at the top of the Crystal Mountain lies the Land East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon; but how to get there I know not save that it is near the Wild Forest."

So Sesshomaru thanked the Miroku and went to the Wild Forest. And as he got near there he found two men quarrelling, the assassins Bankotsu and Jakotsu and as he came near they came towards him and asked him to settle their dispute.

"Now what is it?" said Sesshomaru.

"Our father has just died and he has left but two things, this cap which, whenever you wear it, nobody can see you, and these shoes, which will carry you through the air to whatever place you will. Now I being the elder claim the right of choice, which of these two I shall have; and he declares that, as the younger, he has the right to the shoes. Which do you think is right?"

So Sesshomaru thought and thought, and at last he said, "It is difficult to decide, but the best thing I can think of is for you to race from here to that tree yonder, and whoever gets back to me first I will hand him either the shoes or the cap, whichever he wishes."

So he took the shoes in one hand and the cap in the other, and waited until they had started off running towards the tree. He smirked evilly, and as soon as they had started running towards the tree he put on the shoes of swiftness and placed the invisible cap on his head and wished himself in the Land East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon.

And he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, and he flew, over seven Bends, and seven Glens, and seven Mountain Moors, until at last he came to the Crystal Mountain. And on the top of that, as the dolphin had said, there was the Land East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon.

Holy shit, it existed. They even had a sign up there with that long ass name on it.

Now when he got there he took off his invisible cap and shoes of swiftness and asked who ruled over the Land he was told that there was a king named Naraku who had seven daughters who dressed in swans' feathers and flew wherever they wished.

Then Sesshomaru knew that he had come to the Land of his wife. And he went boldly to Naraku and said, "Hail, oh king, I have come to seek my wife."

And Naraku said, "Who the fuck are you, you gay looking stranger? And who is your wife?"

Sesshomaru said, "Your youngest daughter. And look at your own violet-eyeshadow-wearing self before you call anyone else gay looking." Then he told him how he had won her.

Then Naraku cried like a pansy for he had no comeback, and said; "If you can tell her from her sisters then I know that what you say is true." And he summoned his seven daughters to him, and there they all were, dressed in their robes of feathers and looking each like all the rest.

So Sesshomaru said, "If I may take each of them by the hand I will surely know my wife" for when she had dwelt with him she had sewn the little shifts and dresses of her children, and the forefinger of her right hand had the marks of the needle.

And when he had taken the hand of each of the swan maidens he soon found which was his wife Kagura and claimed her for his own. Then Naraku shouted random obscenities at them in German while they made their way down the Crystal Mountain.

And after a while they reached home, and lived happily together ever afterwards.